LATE NITE: THE REVIEWS:
THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH JAY LENO (NBC)
JAY LENO. In the words of that ill-fated character from that really funny movie I can’t remember the name of’ “Wha’ happened?” He USED to be a comic. He used to be really funny. He used to eat roast beef sandwiches on the Letterman show in between being hilarious. Now, the show is…I don’t know – he does this bad, pandering monologues. The jokes are solid, but his delivery is full of insecurity. Like a dog that needs his belly rubbed. So yes, he has no writers, and no, I can’t tell much of a difference. He does earn points, though - for appearing very honest during his last bunch of shows, and frankly, I can’t even tell the difference in his monologue – but is he really writing it on his own???? Who cares. The best thing he ever did was have Jimmy Kimmel on as a guest – that was a CLASS MOVE and one of the better interviews he’s ever done.
GRADE: C +
THE LATE, LATE SHOW with CRAIG FERGUSON (CBS)
Ferguson - As insignificant as before the strike. Boy, do I not get this one. He was fine on DREW CARRY – but really, in the however many years he’s been on, not once has anyone ever said to me, nor have I ever overheard, nor will I ever over hear “Did you catch Ferguson last night?”
GRADE: D +
LATE NIGHT with CONAN O’BRIEN (NBC)
We're going on something like 13 years without Conan making me laugh - without his writers - he's actually making me frown. His videotaped "guitar hero" bit was the unfunniest moment of the new year. So many of my friends and associates just love him – and I will admit – he has GREAT writers and there are many inspired bits. But Conan himself? Unfunny. Always has been, always will be. The worst interviewer in the world – on par with Tyra Banks. I’m not kidding. Have you seen him conduct an interview. He lets the celeb say something, than he interrupts with a shockingly unfunny self deprecating remark. I guess he really is the white Tyra Banks. Although, Tyra is clearly insane. I don’t think Conan’s actually insane – just really, really REALLY not funny.
Grade: D
THE LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN (CBS)
Letterman - Looked very manly with his beard - and his show was just flat-out funny. He had writers, and Letterman just happens to be funny and nearly at the top of his game. His top ten list with out of work writers was particularly funny. As the weeks have gone on, what can I say – the guy is just late night gold.
Grade: A -
KIMMEL LIVE! With JIMMY KIMMEL (ABC)
The very best of the lot. Jimmy was just himself, funny and charming, and Andy Dick was very funny as well as the first picket crossing guest. Jimmy’s monologue has been very interesting, and he’s truly a gifted ad-libber. And as far as the future of late nite, Kimmel is the one to watch.
Jimmy Kimmel was really funny with Dr. Drew talking about CELEB REHAB. He called Jeff Conway criminally insane and among the living dead. I love his MOMENTS OF THE PAST which pays his on strike staff residuals. I wish he’d dig into the closet from the summer of 06’ – now there was some comedy bit GOLD! But Kimmel is the guy, and if they put him on at 11 30, I think he would give all these guys a serious run for their money. Having Jay on was great, and hands down the funniest Jay's been since his pre-Tonight show days. That "monkey-in-a-cup" story was laugh out loud funny. Jay actually rocked on Jimmy's show. They should do that more often.
Grade: A +
SWEENEY TODD (DVD SCREENER)
Johnny Depp is brilliant and haunted in one of his best roles ever. Tune wise, he sort of channels David Bowie (Mark G. pointed that out to me) and succeeds much more in song than I ever would’ve suspected. Helena Bonham Carter is just okay – but the tragic tale and revenge blood lust take center stage in this lavishly produced, extremely dark musical. I enjoyed it, but at just under 2 hours, it drags a bit, and as usual with Tim Burton directing, the story could’ve been a bit clearer.
Grade: A
BEST NIGHT EVER (VH1)
A five minute version of BEST WEEK EVER – I love this show – so I’ll take it every night, but the format here is very different with only one comic doing some bits and the overall quality isn’t as funny – but it’s good – and only five minutes.
GRADE: B -
BIGGEST LOSER: COUPLES (NBC)
I had never really watched this before but I have quickly become a huge fan. This couples idea is great and let’s face it – it’s just really fun to watch seriously overweight people lose a lot of weight and see that transformation. But I can’t believe how fat some of the people are when they start – there is one guy on there that was over 400 pounds. He’s now lost about 40 pounds and the only minute difference I can spot is that his tits are now sagging about a half inch lower.
Grade: B +
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
"TEARJERKER" This was a full on 007 spoof that worked SO well – you just had to be there.
Grade: A -
DR. DREW'S CELEB REHAB (VH1)
Wow, where do I begin. Mary Carry literally looks like she’s there to get stoned and laid from the guy from CRAZY TOWN. She is such a complete moron I can’t believe that drugs are her number one problem. I loved when she said “Some people also know me from politics.” Yes, as the crazy porn star who made a ridiculous bid for office that included porn. About 4 years ago I was at Oddysey Video on Lankershim and I was innocently renting some dvds when Mary Carry came in – asked me to hold a camera, and photograph her with the two guys behind the front desk. Right as I was about to click, Ms. Carry pulled down her top. I will always remember that and be grateful to Ms. Carry, however, she has to be one of the more ridiculous “celebrities” out there. She was told at the beginning by Dr. Drew that “no drugs and no sex” were part of the routine there, so she brings her own porno tapes and says “At least I can watch myself have sex!” Yeah, she’s getting cured. I have no idea who the guy from CRAZYTOWN is, but he reminds me of a less angry Vanilla Ice. Chyna Doll is sort of a train wreck, as is Brigitte Nielson, who actually does seem to take this a bit seriously. But the hands down, bat shit crazy spectacle of this entire show, and a man I’d like to see get his own comical half hour next season, has to be the hilarious Jeff Conway. Man, he is so fucked up – he video’d himself doing blow the entire night before he got there – and he can’t actually talk. I mean, the guy who used to crack me up on TAXI can’t talk. Even after his rest he came out and reminded me of one of the patients in AWAKENINGS before they got the miracle drug. And Jessica Sierra – I know she was on IDOL, I know she has been in and out of jail, I know she is expecting both a baby and a porn film she did for drugs. I think the porno arrives first. And the show is surprisingly real and candid and with the exception of Mary Carry and Daniel Baldwin, who appears to be in an infomercial for himself, you can’t help but feel incredibly empathetic towards these people (I hate to use the term celebrity – as some of them I have never heard of) – but – just the fact that they’re in there getting help is actually heartening. Is it completely exploitive? Completely. But if Dr. Drew can make Jeff Conway talk again, then the entire enterprise was worth it.
Grade: A
UPDATE: I just watched the second episode – apparently Jeff Conway has two personalities: comatose and explosively angry. All kidding aside, this show is serious about calling these guys out on their bullshit, Dr. Drew is a perfect host and doctor on this, and I’m actually rooting for every one of these people to get better – they all really need it. Although I swear Daniel Baldwin is there simply to make jokes and get some face time.
Grade: A
SCOTT BAIO IS 46 and PREGNANT
After a mildly fun, mildly scripted first season, this show is back for an even less fun, more scripted season. The scripting at the beginning of the show was laughable.
Grade: D
ROCK OF LOVE 2
This is the one! I don’t know what it is about this setup, but Bret Michaels is absolutely the man to be doing this show – and the girls they are getting on are crazy in the BEST POSSIBLE WAY. But don’t threaten me with a good time.
Grade: A
I LOVE NY SEASON 2: THE REUNION (VH1)
NY and Taylor Made find love! But…are those grainy images true – is there a NY sex tape on the way????.....if you have info on this alleged tape, links, descriptions, screen shots, please send them to this blog so I can personally help New York out and find the culprit! Send your info to
TheDigitalCouch@aol.com
By the way – if there are any comments, questions or anything you want to talk about – please drop me a line at that email.
DAN IN REAL LIFE (DVD SCREENER)
Wow – this was SO much better than I ever would’ve thought. Carrel is pitch perfect – and Dane Cook – God Bless him – he’s fine in this role. Anything that doesn’t have comedy in it – Dane seems to succeed in – so basically, Dane Cook started this entire MYSPACE revolution to become this big comic based on his internet audience (and not, sad to say, on his "scary dangerous comedy.) And as it turns out – not only does he fucking SUCK at anything resembling comedy, but he turns out to be a decent character actor. Go figure. Meanwhile, the film is terrific and Steve Carrel, after grating everyone’s nerves all year on the increasingly fucking horrible OFFICE, reminds us just how great and subtle an actor he can really be. And touching. Recommended.
Grade: B +
BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
What the hell happened? How did this show get good all of a sudden? The recent ep where Shatner took on a murder case by himself was terrific.
Grade: B –
WIFE SWAP (ABC)
I know this is a particularly low rent show, but it rocks.
Grade: C +
THE APPRENTICE: CELEBRITY EDITION (NBC)
Wow, this show has gotten exactly the right makeover. The celebs are mostly people you’ve heard of at least. For me, it’s fun to see Big Pussy Pastore try to operate with humans. But the real draw here is the insanely unlikable Omarosa, who could literally give lessons on how to alienate everybody around you simply by opening your mouth.
UPDATE: I watched the 2nd ep – where Nadia Commenichi gets fired! How dare Trump! But this version of the show is terrific.
Grade: B -
THE JANICE DICKINSON SHOW (OXY)
A very nasty woman. A mildly entertaining show. At a full hour though, seems like this is padded. Janice slapping her drunk model recently was very bracing. Remember when her and Omarosa had the BEST SEASON EVER on Surreal Life? With Omarosa calling Janice a “crackhead” and Janice trying to climb out of a window?
Grade: C +
THE BAD GIRLS CLUB (OXY)
The sick, deeply disturbed girls are getting even sicker. I don’t know any of their names, their all just memorable for the layers of craziness. I fuckign HATE Naveen - the odd looking judgemental woman who supposedly co-hosts some morning radio show in Portland. For some reason, I seroiusly doubt this scenario. Like -maybe she was an intern and got on the air a few times? If she is a part of a real show, I can't imagine the unfunniness going down. Lyric is self centered and somewhat retarded. Her music career is going about as well as her criminal record. Her explanation for why she ripped off a woman at a bar was priceless. ("I needed to pay rent a lot more than that rich bitch needed her drinks.") Priceless. Genavecia seems pointless and I can't remember anything about her. Darlene is insane, with a six year old daughter and a penchant for being drunk, fighting and cursing. She's also a slob. She seems born to have confrontation. Hannah does not register AT ALL! Tenisha is the loud, angry black woman who runs around the house physicaly trying to fight people. She is a one man show and they should probably give her her own half hour next year. She's hilarious and sick and cruel and crazy, and that's just the half of it. Lastly, my favorite slut, Cordelia. She has a fiance', she strips, she's screwing some Jewish guy she met since being there, and she says she uses sex as a weapon. My cat Munchy is smarter than this woman. He is!
Anyway, as usual, I love this show. Keep it coming!
Grade: B +
www.badgirlsclubonoxygen.com/bio.html
FAST FOOD NATION (HBO)
I missed this in theaters, but caught up with this film a few days ago on HBO. Based on the fact filled FAST FOOD NATION book that documented just how fucked up the fast food industry is (Apparently, Mickey D’s has more actual feces in their meat than any of the other chains – Go McDonald’s!,) this movie – instead of trying to be a docu, decided to dramatize the whole thing with Greg Kinear as a fast food investigator who works for one of the biggest chains. There are lots of star cameos, from Wilmer Valderama (surprisingly good) to Bruce Willis (always an asshole – but it works here.) Richard Linklatter directs. I have to say, having seen many docus on the subject, having read the book – I’m super familiar with all the themes. But this really might be the first time a studio movie made a film that is anti-meat. We find out why there is so much crap in the fast food meat, how the stuff is made – from the farms to the slaughterhouses, and finally, in the haunting, wordless final 13 minutes, the absolute nightmare of the slaughterhouse. This is a great, important film and while it meanders here and there, it’s short and mostly to the point, with some of the most grave sequences I”ve ever seen. I don’t think anything I’ve seen recently that beats the last 15 minutes. A great, important film that I give my absolute highest recommendation to.
Grade: A +
Remember the first, great few seasons of JUST SHOOT ME when it was just this really funny new show that figured out a perfect way to use David Spade? I don't know what happened to that show - but it was pretty fucking great in its first 3 seasons.
AS I AM - ALICIA KEYS (CD)
The whole CD is pretty spectacular in a quiet, moving way. But it really reaches an early peak with "No One" which is a fantastic bouncy single. Here is the link:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ktUSIJEiOug&feature=related
there are 3 or 4 other songs on thd CD that are in the same arena - it's really good.
Grade: B
THE STORY OF US (CABLE)
Once in a great, great while - a movie comes along that is so bad, so pretentious, so confident about it's horrible sense of humor - that movie, is THE STORY OF US. I have never seen this, but did not pass up the opportunity when it came on cable (I can't remember which channel.) I truly can't describe the levels of badness this filmed entertainment reaches. Just know that Bruce Willis sets the tone right in the first minute, giving a ridiculous testimonial to the camera as he tries to be funny, sad and poignant. I knew right there - in the first minute - that this was going to be one of the all time worst movies in the history of the movies. The film is about the break up of Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfeiffer. Michelle looks gorgeous. Bruce looks like his usual total douche bag self. Only he's trying to be "comic." The kids are given "funny" dialog. The movie seems to be made around the time that SEINFELD was really popular and tries for that vibe of irreverence. Boy, does it not work. Perhaps the best/worst of the film is NOT the girls getting together and complaining about the men (although - make no mistake - it's really bad and unfunny.) Just wait until Bruce gets together with his two buddies, Rob Reiner (the writer/director of this piece of shit) and long time Seinfeld impersonator - the achingly unfunny Paul Resier. In their scenes together, Reiser does a really bad Seinfeld impression and Reiner does a really bad George Costanza impression - with no laugh track - and no laughs. Nothing I could write here could prepare you for this - but mark my words, this is one of the very worst excuses of a movie you will ever see - and on that level - you are in for a treat.
Grade: Z
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Movin' Out (Brian's Song). Even in the title – this episode lampoons more things (including the Robot from ROCKY IV) then any other half hour out there. And this episode in particular was about as funny as things get on this show. Brian moves in with his girlfriend, and Stewie ends up moving in to help them pay the rent. One of this season’s best.
Grade: A
ART SCHOOL CONFIDENTIAL (SHOWTIME)
Much better than it’s reputation, but can somebody who’s seen this please shoot me an email and let me know who the killer is? (Yes, there is a serial killer subplot that subverts, and ultimately completely derails this film.)
Grade: C +
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
Homer burns down Fast Food row. I forget what happened after that, but I think it was funny. But I can’t be sure.
THE LITTLE GIRL WHO LIVES DOWN THE LANE (SHOWTIME)
Wow – this is a great old movie with Jodie Foster as the little girl and Martin Sheen as the sicko perv trying to play LOLITA with her. This is a GREAT, creepy old movie, and besides one unfortunate scene involving prosthetics, is nearly perfect. I remember reading this book as a kid and kind of loving it. Somehow, the movie casts a glow nearly as somber and interesting as the book. This is the perfect chilly date movie with a bottle of wine – and though the movie is dangerous in its sort of pre-politically correct notions – the most startling moment came about half way through when a 13 year old Jodie Foster changes clothes and the camera doesn’t flinch. That was really shocking and brief – but something you’d never see in today’s modern cinema. But it’s an important scene in that it cinematically displays the womanhood that this very young girl has due to an adult life lived too soon.
Grade: A +
THE WIRE (HBO)
It’s back. It’s better than ever, and I can’t believe this is the last season. Though it does feel like the end of something, this was truly edgy and complicated television. Like THE SOPRANOS, a one of a kind show that will never have an imitator. I’m looking forward to these last episodes. I thought last Sunday, with McNulty screwing around with that dead body, was pretty disturbing.
Grade: A +
I'M NOT THERE (IN THEATERS)
I have to confess, while I know all the big hits, I’ve never been a HUGE Dylan fan, so me and G. went into this hoping to become fans, but quickly found out that one needs to already BE one in order to enjoy this properly. We left after an hour, in a sea of frustration and exhaustion. That makes maybe the 5th time in my life I’ve ever left a theater mid-movie. (The other ones were FAR & AWAY, ENCINO MAN, THE LAST ACTION HERO, and SUPERMAN RETURNS.) Amazingly, I stayed all the way to the end on the two films I consider the worst every made – ARTHUR 2: ARTHUR ON THE ROCKS and…I can’t say it. A friend wrote it and I just can’t. Let’s just say….nothing. If you ask me personally I’ll tell you (via email.) (HINT: the film is over 12 years old and features Kathy Bates - and the movie is a truly obscure one.
Grade: ?
THE SOPRANOS "Whitecaps" (DVD)
Wow – what an episode to close out the 4th season. The fighting that went on between Tony and Carmella over a lifetime of Tony’s infidelity was literally a shake the walls experience – and a masterful episode.
Grade: A +
30 ROCK (nbc)
An okay episode about Kenneth becoming a coffee junky and Alec Baldwin ending his affair with Edie Falco. I think this was their last fresh ep, and the ending, which was a musical – was excellent.
Grade: B
THE SIMPSONS MOVIE (DVD)
What can I say? A pretty big disappointment, but certainly not without laughs. It just seemed really crude and not as layered as the half hour version, nor as witty.
Grade: C
OPRAH WINFREY PRESENTS ONE MORE DAY (ABC)
I think the title was actually longer - but this was a tv movie that I probably wouldn't have paid attention to if not for the inclusion of the great Michael Imperiolli, whose career I will follow for a long time to come. Anyway - this aired forever ago and I don't even know if anybody watched it - but it was really good, if really sentimental, and Imperiolli can do anything. The tv film was about a washed up ball player (Imperiolli) who gets one more day his mother after she dies. It was sort of predictable, but Ellen Burstyn was fine as mom and Imperiolli was great - anyway - there it is. Pointless since the network tv movie has to be the hardest to track down - and this wasn't great.
Grade: C -
Okay, of all places, I found this new singer, ADELE, on PEREZHILTON.COM of all fucking places. But she sounds a bit like the Wino, but different....I don't know. It's almost a brilliant impression, but her voice is great if you like that smokey Wino affect - and the songs I've heard thus far are really really good. Anyway - if you're interested - go here:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=7032442
DATELINE: TO CATCH A PREDATOR (NBC)
I hadn't seen this in a long time. Since the last ep aired, there has been a LOT of controversy and speculation that this show is truly entrapping some of these guys, that the operation is dangerous and sloppy, and that real law enforcement aren't running the show. All that aside for a moment, how fucking great is this show? Maybe the best EVER? Did you see the one guy on his birthday - he was so happy to be there! Or that parapeligic who was quite sexually evil? I think the real drawer on this is that - once those dudes enter that house - it is straight downhill. Their entire lives. This is a scary show, with scary people, and it raises a lot of moral questions. One question though, has never been in doubt. When this is running, you simply can't take your eyes off the screen.
Grade: A
DREAMGIRLS (HBO)
How did I not see this last year? Anyway, this is a GREAT movie. The first time I've ever really liked Jaime Fox (I fucking hated RAY) and Eddie Murphy is fantastic. The rest of the cast, Jenifer Hudson included, is a bit on the amateur side - but the ton of great songs, dancing and the actual story itself is so compelling that I wish the filmakers were a little more eloquent in the telling of it and some of the poor editing and directing choices make this less than perfect. Still, Hudson singing some of those songs, Eddie Murphy's final performance in the film - this is pretty great stuff. Highly reccomended.
Grade: A
AMERICAN IDOL (FOX)
What can I say, I’m not a huge fan of the first few weeks. But these early eps are slightly better produced then they were in years past, where they basically told you before the actual audition who did well. Ryan Seacrest would say something like “And before Brian Astin auditioned, these judges had thought they’d heard the worst of it!” I never understood why they cut the suspense from their own show. You can still tell – if they do a ton of production work on someone’s segment, like going to their hometown and stuff – they get through. I’m already bored of this – I wish we’d just get to the competition.
Grade: C
2008/01/20
2007/12/30
Last blog of 2oo7!
EXTRAS (SERIES FINALE) (HBO)
Being that this is the exact same format the BBC OFFICE went (2 seasons and a wrap up,) this had a lot to live up to. TV GUIDE actually let some spoilers leak, so I went into this knowing a few things, which sucked. However, despite that, this was pretty bloody good. They took the Andy character about as far as they could take him as well as his platonic relationship with…(It can’t be a great sign that I don’t remember her name – although she was never my favorite part of the show.) I wish there had been more scenes of Andy and his agent, and the whole thing was a bit on the dark side, but that’s probably why I liked it so much. I wish there had been a bit more finesse to it, and a few of the jokes were a bit too self conscience (like the Kramer doll and the Direc TV bit) but mostly, this was pretty great. Who even knew we were getting a finale? Although – strangely enough, it kind of felt like a bigger rewrite of the last episode of the series (the ep with DeNiro.) While EXTRAS will never be in the same category as THE OFFICE BBC, it did have many many moments of greatness, particularly the second season. And to have this 90 minute finale was a great cap to a damn fine show. While I think they over stated their point a few times, and got a bit preachy here and there, this still worked exceedingly well and serves as a satisfying conclusion to the show.
Grade: A -
THERE WILL BE BLOOD (IN THEATERS)
Long. Tedious. And kind of brilliant. Daniel Day Lewis is so good. Paul Anderson Thomas, best known for the perfect BOOGIE NIGHTS, somehow changes who he is as a filmaker in this 3 hour epic based on the oil biz in the 20s. Lewis’ performance will haunt you for a long time to come.
Grade: A
LARS AND THE REAL GIRL (IN THEATERS)
Clever concept. Piss poor execution. For proof that Ryan Gosling can star in a horrible movie, look no further. If you really want to see what a REAL GIRL (an expensive sex doll) looks like, go to www.realgirl.com - at least you won’t have to sit through this movie. Which is bad. Really really bad.
Grade: D
THE SAVAGES (IN THEATRES)
Laura Linney and Phillip Seymour Hoffman are touching and real in this great film I recently saw directed by Tamara Jenkins – who you might remember from the great SLUMS OF BEVERLY HILLS. This is a lot more bleak than that film – but the performances are so good there is simply never a dull moment. As good as Linney is, I think that Hoffman might be the best actor of his generation.
Grade: A
SPIDERMAN 3 (DVD)
A 2 hour and 20 minute fucking insult. Some of the best special effects in recent memory as well as some of the very worst dialog, acting, pacing, directing, lighting, scoring and mostly every other aspect of this sitcom-like extension of the franchise. To get the big picture, this is the last BATMAN film with George Clooney that everybody hated and killed the franchise. This is the worst of the 3 new STAR WARS films, all of which were truly drop dead awful. Sam Raimi is a GREAT director. He made the EVIL DEAD trilogy, which is insanely good. He also made a great drama called A SIMPLE PLAN that features the best Bill Paxton and Billy Bob Thornton performances you’re ever likely to see. I even think he made a great actress out of Bridget Fonda in that movie. But this is dead on arrival. The bad sitcom like plotting in terms of the James Franco character and his….it’s too complicated. Anyway – very, very bad. With good intentions. Had they chopped this down to 90 minutes, it could’ve been okay – but probably not. It’s just bad. Really, really bad. Awful.
Gradeless.
Fuck you, Rami. Wasting my time with this bullshit.
PS: Why does the SPIDERMAN theme sound EXACTLY like the BATMAN theme? Did they think we wouldn’t notice? Even the music cues seem to be lifted directly from Batman. What’s up with that? I’m not kidding – it’s EXACTLY the same score only somehow not quite as good.
RUNNIN DOWN A DREAM: TOM PETTY DOCU (DVD)
Not a huge Petty fan but this 4 hour docu by Peter Bogdonavich almost made me one. This package comes with 2 dvds that cover the docu, another dvd of a unreleased great live show, and a 4th disc – a CD with live cuts and rarities. This is 25 bux at Best Buy. If you’re into Petty – this is an insane deal.
Highly recommended.
PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN 3 (DVD)
I had this for a month. I just sat down to watch it. I got through about 4 minutes.
I think women really love Depp and Bloom, for I know no man who likes these movies.
I don’t get it.
Not even a little.
T2: JUDGEMENT DAY (DVD - XTREME EDITION)
By the way, this double disc, loaded to the gills with extras and Easter eggs, is TARGET right now for 5.95 - which means it's probably about to be re-released - but you'd do well to own this version. Since this is one of the best action films ever made, with and ending as good and sentimental as the rest of the film is action fill led. The "extended version" has a few unfortunate moments that probably should've remained on the cutting room floor (like Eddie Furlong teaching Arnold's Terminator how to "smile".) However, when we get the entire REESE flashback - it's hard to argue with the longer edition. The extras are so plentiful on this 2 discer that the 5.95 price at TARGET is a bit of a lovely joke. By the way, T3 pretty much sucked, and T4 is coming. Imagine how exciting it would be if Cameron were returning to the series? With Eddie Furlong? Nah, it'll be Christian Bale and an action director. (sigh.)
Grade: A +
GOODFELLAS (DVD)
Watched a bit of this just recently - the newer editions have a great commentary track with the actual wiseguy himself, Henry Hill. Still, the scenes with Maury are still the greatest of all time, and Joe Pesci's "You think I'm funny" is still frightengly fantastic.
Grade: A+
COOL AS ICE (SHOWTIME)
I recently watched for the first time - this Vanilla Ice movie from the late 80s - and WOW, this is some bad shit. And not in the bad/good way - this is just BAD. Yet, it's so bad it's borderline brilliant. It's shot in the worst style I've ever seen, Vanilla Ice's wardrobe and hairstyle are ones for hte ages, his "friends" from the hood - trust me - this fucking thing just has to be seen to be believed. How Michael Gross got sucked into this is anybodies guess - but check out the first time we see the "normal" family and how the director wanted them to play out in a sort of "RAP"....this is impossible to explain - you have to see this stinking bad flick.
Grade: F / A (for camp value)
For some reason I reviewed this twice - I always find it interesting to compare what I was thinking on what day - the next review I must've wrote after just watching it - let's compare:
COOL AS ICE (HBO)I started watching this VANILLA ICE movie the other night on cable - I don't know who the girl is but she was gorgeous. The father of the girl who likes Vanilla Ice is played by Michael Gross. Now let me see if I can explain the plotline of this "film" - as I understand it. Vanilla Ice is cool. Cool as Ice. In fact, at the beginning of the movie, he's breakdancing in dry ice, so we KNOW he's cool. Also - his 3 best friends, his little motorcycle gang - is black. And one of them is a CHICK! So yeah - we know he's cool. After Ice and the girl meet cute around her horse (I'm not kidding) she sort of punches him in the chest to which Ice replies "You hit pretty good - for a girl." She smartly snaps back with "Well, coming from a big dangerous biker like you, I'll take that as a compliment." They almost smile at each other - but not quite. FUCK! This movie is COOL!!!!!!! They then show her family, lead by Michael Gross of FAMILY TIES as the dad, and for soem inexplicable reason, the family scene is initially shot in a bad hip-hop style that doesn't seem to make sense - u sort of have to see it to believe it. And then, even more inexpliciably, Ice and his friends take their bikes to be repaired by an old "funny" couple that live next door to this girl! (Like I said - it has to be seen to be believed.) Anyway - Ice and the girl get close, dad reveals that he's under the witness protection program due to some tomfoolery in his police career - you know what - just see the film - some movies are so bad they're just bad - this movie is so bad it's fucking GOLD, Jerry, GOLD.Grade: A
MEATLOAF: 3 BATS LIVE (DVD)
This is personally hard for me because I LOVE Meatloaf. He’s been a part of my musical reference since I was a kid. But there is some unfortunate things happening in this DVD. This is one of the best Meatloaf concerts ever put on dvd – and the man’s voice is not up to it. Meat is about 62, and his voice is slipping. This is a GREAT collection, and it works despite the vocal limitations, but still – what a shame. Also, OBJECTS and ANYTHING FOR LOVE are both strangely missing their middle verses (he did this in the show me and Steven G. saw in San Diego as well.) But – for the big fans – this is a must, and the videos are pretty cool, though for some reason at the last minute, a 2nd disc with a great docu on Meat is missing. (maybe they’ll release it later – but apparently this was a 90 minute docu that truly rocked.) Also, why does he choose to end this show with some horrible bad songs from NON BAT cds and then a horrifying cover of GIMME SHELTER? Still, a lot of this really does rock. And if his voice isn’t up to par, the band and his energy and even the blind enthusiasm of the new 20 year old singer that replaces Patti Russo, who’d been in the band for 20 years but has left in a cloud of mystery, giving way to this newer onstage singer, who resembles Meat’s granddaughter and makes watching then make out in PARADISE a bit creepy. It’s still a lot of great songs with Meatloaf at the helm. One only wonders what kind of encore they’d have if Meat were still in tip top voice and Jim Steinman was all the way involved in both Bat 3 and the following tour; as he was on BAT 2. Either way, if you ever loved BAT OUT OF HELL and you buy music dvds, this is definitely a must buy. The sound is superb. And some of the versions are really growing on me. Oh, fuck – don’t listen to me – I LOVE Meatloaf. Even when he’s not at his best. I just love the guy. Impossible for me to give him a bad grade when he’s out there killing himself singing his biggest hits.
Grade: B +
DRAWN TOGETHER (COM)
"Drawn Together Babies"This was a pretty funny, if completely inconsistent with the show's mythology, (which changes all the time anyway) but fun nonetheless to see the babies up for murder and mayhem even in diapers. Sometimes this show is SERIOUSLY funny – this was not one of those times.
Grade: B –
ER (NBC)Really seems to be chugging along. Most of the major players are gone, but there are enough new players and some revitilization of the older characters to make this season (reportedly the last) very satisfying.
THE SOPRANOS "WHOEVER DID THIS" (DVD)
I recently re watched this episode in which Joey Pants meets his maker. Brilliant. Tony lets Ralphie get away with killing a stripper but kills him over a horse. This show will be missed forever. Will there ever be characters like this again?
MY NIGHT AT THE GRAMMYS (CBS)
This could have been great – 2 hours of fantastic grammy moments. Unfortunately, it was ruined by placing celebrities in little boxes to comment on, and therefore ruin, every performance shown.
Grade:
Concept: A
Execution: D
BARRY MANILOW - SONGS OF THE 70s (PBS)
If you are a fan of Barry, and I admit, guilty - this was a masterful set of songs, both from the new cd and Barry’s own blistering 70s catalog. It’s not on dvd yet – but I hope it gets there, because it'd be a nice new collection and he puts delivers a stunning performance on I WRITE THE SONGS, which sounds like he just wrote it.
Grade: A +
FRANK TV (TBS)
Frank is a talented guy and a gifted mimic.
I’ve heard him on Stern and found him to be funny, affable and simply lovely.
His show, however, is totally unwatchable.
Grade: F
HOUSE (FOX)
I recently caught up and watched the 4 episodes before the break. Dazzling, smart, brilliantly acted - what sounded like a weird concept of House choosing his new team became a fantastic storytelling device and got House involved with lots of different personalities. Favorite moment: when House hired the chick from the government – then dispatched her when he realized she was an idiot.
Grade: A
SOUTH PARK (COMEDY CENTRAL) - "Imaginationland - parts 1,2 & 3"
This was so good it could’ve been their next feature. The sight of Cartman walking around grousing about Kyle not sucking his balls – maybe you had to be there – but in it’s – whatever number season – the creators have made this funnier, smarter, and more relevant with every episode.
Grade: B +
INTO THE WILD (DVD)
The best film Sean Penn ever made, the best acting by Emille Hirsch ever put on film, and a great retelling of a true story that I remember very well in the early 90s. This kid had graduated high school and decided to forgo his parents money (of which there was a lot of) and decided to go on this half-assed journey to Alaska. Lyrical, trenchant, but never overly romantic about this kid’s plight, this film is going to be talked about for a long time. I thought Eddie Vedder’s songs for the film were all fairly pointless and just took a few points away. (and now - a week and a half after writing this, I'm starting to come around to the soundtrack a little.)
Grade: A -
If you haven’t heard Artie “coming out” to George Takai on STERN – you haven’t lived.
I AM AN ANIMAL: (HBO)
Unforgettaqble images make the case here for going vegan. I haven’t finished watching because some of the images are so disturbing – but based on the first half, which I plan on finishing shortly, it’s a tough look at THE toughest subject.
Grade based on first half: A +
DEXTER (SHOWTIME)
I watched the last 7 episodes in the last couple of weeks. It’s the best. I was a little worried about the first batch of eps because it felt like a certain laziness had set in, but the next run of eps were uniformly exciting and the finale was pitch perfect and in some ways sort of horrifying. Dexter season 2 has a much more satsisfying conclusion than season one. Despite loads of bad acting (the sister actually got worse this year,) DEXTER is one hell of a show. Last year, they put on a great show. This year, they dazzled.
Grade: A +
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
I still love this show, but there were a lot of misses this season.
Grade: B
DAVE ATTEL: CAPTAIN MISERABLE (HBO)
I really like this guy and think he’s really funny. That said, I didn’t get this standup set at all. I thought it intimated comedy but didn’t really deliver any comedy. Which is not to say it doesn’t have its moments. It’s just few and far between.
Grade: D +
Because it’s not aggressively bad.
AN OPEN LETTER TO GEORGE LOPEZ
I saw you on some TV show the other day, talking about the Amy Winehouse nominations. You said something like "I guess if doing drugs, cutting yourself up gets you the nominations...etc.) - You went on to some very bad punchline that didn't even make the reporter laugh. Now here is the deal, Mister Lopez. How your show is still on the air, is truly a testament to good fucking luck and power of your own personal prayer. The reason she got the nominations is because no matter how fucked up her personal life is, Amy Winehouse is the best female singer to come along in about a decade. And I know late at night, when you think about how talented she is, you probably say to yourself "If I only had that talent, I would never do those fucked up things." Unfortunately, that's something you'll never know about, because as marginally talented as you are, and while you are certainly a success by anyone's measure, you will never know what it's like to be as uniquely talented as someone like Winehouse, so please continue to do your rotten sitcom and remember to thank God the next time you are nominated for anything. And as far as doing fucked up things, you did them all! So what the fuck are you talking about? Really, when it comes to Winehouse, keep your mouth shut, hack.
What's the deal with CHARLIE WILSON'S WAR? Tom Hanks in a movie with Julia Roberts?
JULIA ROBERTS as an old southern belle? Jesus fucking Christ. Does nobody remember "I kissed Sidney Pottier" at the Oscars???? Julia being in a movie in which she could potentially be nominated or even win, or even do a round of talk shows is a BAD BAD THING AND MUST BE STOPPED.
Ryan Seacrest is the only bad thing in KNOCKED UP. His promos on IN DEMAND where he spoofs his role, are so bad my cat recently learned how to change the channel.
GOOD OL' CHARLES SHULZ (PBS)
I am and always will be a huge fan of PEANUTS. It’s been a huge part of my life and it’s the classiest, funniest thing I’d ever read as a kid and kept reading for a long time after. This docu, which has a lot of testimonials from people close to the creator of Peanuts, Charles M. Schultz, and lots of footage of Schultz himself being interviewed. I would’ve liked to have seen the last hour, but TIME/WARNER fucked my shit up and erased everything on my DVR, and it was on PBS, so who knows when it’s be on again – but based on what I saw, and how interesting it managed to be and how Schulz is really a compelling subject….
Grade: A +
HOSTEL 2 (DVD)
Get the unrated version – I think I reviewed this last time, but ended up seeing it again with a friend, and I now think it’s even better than I initially gave it credit for. It’s creepy and funny and about the best they could do for an encore, to the first, better film. But this is pretty fun. The scene in which the various guys around the world are bidding is an instant classic.
Grade: B +
SUPERBAD (DVD – UNRATED EDITION)
This rocked. Maybe not as much as KNOCKED UP, but it's not a really fair comparison. They are two completely different, and hilarious, movies. As far as SUPERBAD goes, not quite everything works. The more outlandish and high-concept some of the bits get, the less fun they play out since this is mostly grounded in reality. But for straight out belly laughs, look no further. And as good as Michael Cera is, Jonah Hill, seen in 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN trying to buy boots at Kathy Keener's Ebay store - and in KNOCKED UP as Seth's fould mouthed friend - becomes a star in this movies. I think this guy could do anything - and he's one of the funniest guys to come around in a while.
Grade: A -
JANICE DICKENSON MODELING AGENCY (OXYGEN)
Janice is insanely unlikable and unpleasant, yet I really like this show, somehow a little better in it’s 3rd season than it was in its second.
BAD GIRLS CLUB (Season 2 – OXYGEN)
The new bad girls appear to be a pretty insane lot, but I don’t think anything will ever compare to the first season girls. They seemed to have personalities beyond the fighting. These girls are just truly insane on every level. And highly entertaining.
Grade: B -
DAVID GILMOUR: REMEMBER THAT NITE (DVD)
One of the best sounding dvds out there, and Gilmour, who has lost a LOT of credit to Roger Waters, IS the voice of Pink Floyd, plays some of the best guitar in the business, and has a lot of new great songs, particularly, SMILE. Plus the entire Pink Floyd cannon. Here, he performs COMFORTABLY NUMB with David Bowie and an acoustic version of SHINE ON with Crosby, Stills and Nash. Astonishing.
Grade: A
IN POT WE TRUST (SHOWTIME)
Very fine Showtime docu on people who really need medical marijuana. Don't we all?
Grade: B
REBA (SYND)
I recently took in a few eps of this while I was cleaning my apt. I think the success of this show is pretty good proof that the yahoos are winning.
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Da bomb. Bring this one back. I will never look at any restaurant the same way again, and Gordon Ramsey is a TV natural. Great subjects, great episodes.
Grade: B +
A SHOT AT LOVE W/ TILA TEQUILA (MTV)
I’m going to try and imitate Tila’s sing-song voice to try and convey how annoying she sounds. (She does this a lot when she’s trying to sound important.) Okay, so – this is Tila talking, and when she raises her voice, I’ll use caps. Tila Tequila: “Okay, so like, I brought them to my STUDIO. Where I’m a RECORDING ARTIST. And like, my producer has worked with PARIS HILTON and LINDSEY LOHAN, and now, most importantly, TILA TEQUILA.” I’m not kidding – I wish I could record a sample of what I mean and post it – I’m sure I could find a perfect you tube clip, but I’m too lazy to add these links that would make this a better blog. Tila looks kind of strange. Not that she’s ugly, she’s just…kind of weird. So – this was a dating show with a twist – Tila supposedly wanted to figure out if she wanted to end up with a guy or a girl. Tila: “I’m coming out now and it’s really IMPORTANT to me. And I don’t know if I want a GUY or a GIRL or what…” Now, the show was great, had great characters, truly some real fucking maniacs, and the conclusion was interesting enough. But I think it’s all bullshit. I’ve heard from a lot of people that Tila has a boyfriend, and is totally hetero (the scenes of her kissing other women didn’t really came off as authentic.) So I guess this was to promote her music career. Her what? I’ve heard some of it, and I prefer to listen to the SPIDERMAN THREE album. Oh my GOD, I’m talking like TILA now…I wonder if because she has a sing-song voice she thought she could sing?
Grade: C
How annoying do the new ads for PS I LOVE YOU with Hilary Swank look? How annoying is Hilary Swank? Bleeeeeeeeeeeeeech.
Remember when NIP/TUCK used to be smart, sexy, and daring? Now it’s one shitbag story after the other. And isn’t it funny how after they exploited living in Los Angeles for a few episodes, now the show could take place back in Miami for all of it’s CALIFORNIA vibe it wants to have? Honestly – the time has come. Maybe Ryan Murphy can come up with a great batch of episodes to finish this out – but this is the worst show on television. Let’s let all these talented people go on to something new and fresh and not this grim reminder of a once vibrant tv show that actually was cutting edge for its first few seasons.
I saw a few minutes of the HD BLADE RUNNER FINAL CUT at BEST BUY – it looked amazing I want to update every single component I own. It looks truly insane in HD. I’m ready to buy into this technology. I think the way to go is the hybrid HD/BLU RAY machine that plays both. And whoever reads this blog, if you wanted to get me a 70” HD PANASONIC, I would definitely not mind, nor accuse you of trying to buy my friendship.
IDEAS FOR XMAS/CHANUKA (Under 30 bux)
(Sorry – I should’ve had this blog posted 2 weeks ago, but I’ve been busy. So here it is, anyway – still a good way to spend 30 bux.)
1 - Meatloaf - 3 Bats Live
Meat's voice doesn't sound the same, and replacing Patti Russo with a 20 year old was a blunder, but this dvd still kind of rocks.
2 - Tom Petty - Runnin' Down A Dream (dvd at Best Buy only)
I think this is 8 hours long - for serious Petty fans only (I'm not one)
3 - Eagles - Long Road Out Of Eden (Walmart Only - but you can find it on Amazon)
This rocks.
4 - Led Zep - Mothership CD/DVD
Not a huge fan, but supposedly this is fantastic if you are.
5 - Knocked up DVD
Best comedy of the year.
6 - Superbad DVD
Based on the first 10 minutes of which I’ve seen, this is awesome.
7 - WINDY CITY HEAD DVD (always a great stocking stuffer)
Funniest. Movie. Ever.
8 - BLADE RUNNER - THE FINAL CUT (DVD - 2 dvd set)
Apparantly this is THE DIRECTOR'S CUT with some cleaning up of the film and some choice commentary and documentaries - but if you don't have it yet, it's a must have.
9 - CALIGULA Ultimate Edition (2 DVD SET)
Need I say more?
10 - FREAKS & GEEKS - THE ENTIRE SERIES (okay, this one might cost you more then 30, but well worth it)
This show was the bomb. NBC cancelled it, but these guys now seem unstoppable.
11 - THE OFFICE (BBC) - THE ENTIRE SERIES (my highest reccomendation)The best sitcom ever, on a shelf with Seinfeld and The Honeymooners.
LASTLY....
If you don't get the STERN RADIO SHOW on SIRIUS yet, you are only cheating yourself from the hands down funniest dialog you are ever likely to hear in your lifetime.
That’s a wrap for the year.
Don’t drink & drive.
Being that this is the exact same format the BBC OFFICE went (2 seasons and a wrap up,) this had a lot to live up to. TV GUIDE actually let some spoilers leak, so I went into this knowing a few things, which sucked. However, despite that, this was pretty bloody good. They took the Andy character about as far as they could take him as well as his platonic relationship with…(It can’t be a great sign that I don’t remember her name – although she was never my favorite part of the show.) I wish there had been more scenes of Andy and his agent, and the whole thing was a bit on the dark side, but that’s probably why I liked it so much. I wish there had been a bit more finesse to it, and a few of the jokes were a bit too self conscience (like the Kramer doll and the Direc TV bit) but mostly, this was pretty great. Who even knew we were getting a finale? Although – strangely enough, it kind of felt like a bigger rewrite of the last episode of the series (the ep with DeNiro.) While EXTRAS will never be in the same category as THE OFFICE BBC, it did have many many moments of greatness, particularly the second season. And to have this 90 minute finale was a great cap to a damn fine show. While I think they over stated their point a few times, and got a bit preachy here and there, this still worked exceedingly well and serves as a satisfying conclusion to the show.
Grade: A -
THERE WILL BE BLOOD (IN THEATERS)
Long. Tedious. And kind of brilliant. Daniel Day Lewis is so good. Paul Anderson Thomas, best known for the perfect BOOGIE NIGHTS, somehow changes who he is as a filmaker in this 3 hour epic based on the oil biz in the 20s. Lewis’ performance will haunt you for a long time to come.
Grade: A
LARS AND THE REAL GIRL (IN THEATERS)
Clever concept. Piss poor execution. For proof that Ryan Gosling can star in a horrible movie, look no further. If you really want to see what a REAL GIRL (an expensive sex doll) looks like, go to www.realgirl.com - at least you won’t have to sit through this movie. Which is bad. Really really bad.
Grade: D
THE SAVAGES (IN THEATRES)
Laura Linney and Phillip Seymour Hoffman are touching and real in this great film I recently saw directed by Tamara Jenkins – who you might remember from the great SLUMS OF BEVERLY HILLS. This is a lot more bleak than that film – but the performances are so good there is simply never a dull moment. As good as Linney is, I think that Hoffman might be the best actor of his generation.
Grade: A
SPIDERMAN 3 (DVD)
A 2 hour and 20 minute fucking insult. Some of the best special effects in recent memory as well as some of the very worst dialog, acting, pacing, directing, lighting, scoring and mostly every other aspect of this sitcom-like extension of the franchise. To get the big picture, this is the last BATMAN film with George Clooney that everybody hated and killed the franchise. This is the worst of the 3 new STAR WARS films, all of which were truly drop dead awful. Sam Raimi is a GREAT director. He made the EVIL DEAD trilogy, which is insanely good. He also made a great drama called A SIMPLE PLAN that features the best Bill Paxton and Billy Bob Thornton performances you’re ever likely to see. I even think he made a great actress out of Bridget Fonda in that movie. But this is dead on arrival. The bad sitcom like plotting in terms of the James Franco character and his….it’s too complicated. Anyway – very, very bad. With good intentions. Had they chopped this down to 90 minutes, it could’ve been okay – but probably not. It’s just bad. Really, really bad. Awful.
Gradeless.
Fuck you, Rami. Wasting my time with this bullshit.
PS: Why does the SPIDERMAN theme sound EXACTLY like the BATMAN theme? Did they think we wouldn’t notice? Even the music cues seem to be lifted directly from Batman. What’s up with that? I’m not kidding – it’s EXACTLY the same score only somehow not quite as good.
RUNNIN DOWN A DREAM: TOM PETTY DOCU (DVD)
Not a huge Petty fan but this 4 hour docu by Peter Bogdonavich almost made me one. This package comes with 2 dvds that cover the docu, another dvd of a unreleased great live show, and a 4th disc – a CD with live cuts and rarities. This is 25 bux at Best Buy. If you’re into Petty – this is an insane deal.
Highly recommended.
PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN 3 (DVD)
I had this for a month. I just sat down to watch it. I got through about 4 minutes.
I think women really love Depp and Bloom, for I know no man who likes these movies.
I don’t get it.
Not even a little.
T2: JUDGEMENT DAY (DVD - XTREME EDITION)
By the way, this double disc, loaded to the gills with extras and Easter eggs, is TARGET right now for 5.95 - which means it's probably about to be re-released - but you'd do well to own this version. Since this is one of the best action films ever made, with and ending as good and sentimental as the rest of the film is action fill led. The "extended version" has a few unfortunate moments that probably should've remained on the cutting room floor (like Eddie Furlong teaching Arnold's Terminator how to "smile".) However, when we get the entire REESE flashback - it's hard to argue with the longer edition. The extras are so plentiful on this 2 discer that the 5.95 price at TARGET is a bit of a lovely joke. By the way, T3 pretty much sucked, and T4 is coming. Imagine how exciting it would be if Cameron were returning to the series? With Eddie Furlong? Nah, it'll be Christian Bale and an action director. (sigh.)
Grade: A +
GOODFELLAS (DVD)
Watched a bit of this just recently - the newer editions have a great commentary track with the actual wiseguy himself, Henry Hill. Still, the scenes with Maury are still the greatest of all time, and Joe Pesci's "You think I'm funny" is still frightengly fantastic.
Grade: A+
COOL AS ICE (SHOWTIME)
I recently watched for the first time - this Vanilla Ice movie from the late 80s - and WOW, this is some bad shit. And not in the bad/good way - this is just BAD. Yet, it's so bad it's borderline brilliant. It's shot in the worst style I've ever seen, Vanilla Ice's wardrobe and hairstyle are ones for hte ages, his "friends" from the hood - trust me - this fucking thing just has to be seen to be believed. How Michael Gross got sucked into this is anybodies guess - but check out the first time we see the "normal" family and how the director wanted them to play out in a sort of "RAP"....this is impossible to explain - you have to see this stinking bad flick.
Grade: F / A (for camp value)
For some reason I reviewed this twice - I always find it interesting to compare what I was thinking on what day - the next review I must've wrote after just watching it - let's compare:
COOL AS ICE (HBO)I started watching this VANILLA ICE movie the other night on cable - I don't know who the girl is but she was gorgeous. The father of the girl who likes Vanilla Ice is played by Michael Gross. Now let me see if I can explain the plotline of this "film" - as I understand it. Vanilla Ice is cool. Cool as Ice. In fact, at the beginning of the movie, he's breakdancing in dry ice, so we KNOW he's cool. Also - his 3 best friends, his little motorcycle gang - is black. And one of them is a CHICK! So yeah - we know he's cool. After Ice and the girl meet cute around her horse (I'm not kidding) she sort of punches him in the chest to which Ice replies "You hit pretty good - for a girl." She smartly snaps back with "Well, coming from a big dangerous biker like you, I'll take that as a compliment." They almost smile at each other - but not quite. FUCK! This movie is COOL!!!!!!! They then show her family, lead by Michael Gross of FAMILY TIES as the dad, and for soem inexplicable reason, the family scene is initially shot in a bad hip-hop style that doesn't seem to make sense - u sort of have to see it to believe it. And then, even more inexpliciably, Ice and his friends take their bikes to be repaired by an old "funny" couple that live next door to this girl! (Like I said - it has to be seen to be believed.) Anyway - Ice and the girl get close, dad reveals that he's under the witness protection program due to some tomfoolery in his police career - you know what - just see the film - some movies are so bad they're just bad - this movie is so bad it's fucking GOLD, Jerry, GOLD.Grade: A
MEATLOAF: 3 BATS LIVE (DVD)
This is personally hard for me because I LOVE Meatloaf. He’s been a part of my musical reference since I was a kid. But there is some unfortunate things happening in this DVD. This is one of the best Meatloaf concerts ever put on dvd – and the man’s voice is not up to it. Meat is about 62, and his voice is slipping. This is a GREAT collection, and it works despite the vocal limitations, but still – what a shame. Also, OBJECTS and ANYTHING FOR LOVE are both strangely missing their middle verses (he did this in the show me and Steven G. saw in San Diego as well.) But – for the big fans – this is a must, and the videos are pretty cool, though for some reason at the last minute, a 2nd disc with a great docu on Meat is missing. (maybe they’ll release it later – but apparently this was a 90 minute docu that truly rocked.) Also, why does he choose to end this show with some horrible bad songs from NON BAT cds and then a horrifying cover of GIMME SHELTER? Still, a lot of this really does rock. And if his voice isn’t up to par, the band and his energy and even the blind enthusiasm of the new 20 year old singer that replaces Patti Russo, who’d been in the band for 20 years but has left in a cloud of mystery, giving way to this newer onstage singer, who resembles Meat’s granddaughter and makes watching then make out in PARADISE a bit creepy. It’s still a lot of great songs with Meatloaf at the helm. One only wonders what kind of encore they’d have if Meat were still in tip top voice and Jim Steinman was all the way involved in both Bat 3 and the following tour; as he was on BAT 2. Either way, if you ever loved BAT OUT OF HELL and you buy music dvds, this is definitely a must buy. The sound is superb. And some of the versions are really growing on me. Oh, fuck – don’t listen to me – I LOVE Meatloaf. Even when he’s not at his best. I just love the guy. Impossible for me to give him a bad grade when he’s out there killing himself singing his biggest hits.
Grade: B +
DRAWN TOGETHER (COM)
"Drawn Together Babies"This was a pretty funny, if completely inconsistent with the show's mythology, (which changes all the time anyway) but fun nonetheless to see the babies up for murder and mayhem even in diapers. Sometimes this show is SERIOUSLY funny – this was not one of those times.
Grade: B –
ER (NBC)Really seems to be chugging along. Most of the major players are gone, but there are enough new players and some revitilization of the older characters to make this season (reportedly the last) very satisfying.
THE SOPRANOS "WHOEVER DID THIS" (DVD)
I recently re watched this episode in which Joey Pants meets his maker. Brilliant. Tony lets Ralphie get away with killing a stripper but kills him over a horse. This show will be missed forever. Will there ever be characters like this again?
MY NIGHT AT THE GRAMMYS (CBS)
This could have been great – 2 hours of fantastic grammy moments. Unfortunately, it was ruined by placing celebrities in little boxes to comment on, and therefore ruin, every performance shown.
Grade:
Concept: A
Execution: D
BARRY MANILOW - SONGS OF THE 70s (PBS)
If you are a fan of Barry, and I admit, guilty - this was a masterful set of songs, both from the new cd and Barry’s own blistering 70s catalog. It’s not on dvd yet – but I hope it gets there, because it'd be a nice new collection and he puts delivers a stunning performance on I WRITE THE SONGS, which sounds like he just wrote it.
Grade: A +
FRANK TV (TBS)
Frank is a talented guy and a gifted mimic.
I’ve heard him on Stern and found him to be funny, affable and simply lovely.
His show, however, is totally unwatchable.
Grade: F
HOUSE (FOX)
I recently caught up and watched the 4 episodes before the break. Dazzling, smart, brilliantly acted - what sounded like a weird concept of House choosing his new team became a fantastic storytelling device and got House involved with lots of different personalities. Favorite moment: when House hired the chick from the government – then dispatched her when he realized she was an idiot.
Grade: A
SOUTH PARK (COMEDY CENTRAL) - "Imaginationland - parts 1,2 & 3"
This was so good it could’ve been their next feature. The sight of Cartman walking around grousing about Kyle not sucking his balls – maybe you had to be there – but in it’s – whatever number season – the creators have made this funnier, smarter, and more relevant with every episode.
Grade: B +
INTO THE WILD (DVD)
The best film Sean Penn ever made, the best acting by Emille Hirsch ever put on film, and a great retelling of a true story that I remember very well in the early 90s. This kid had graduated high school and decided to forgo his parents money (of which there was a lot of) and decided to go on this half-assed journey to Alaska. Lyrical, trenchant, but never overly romantic about this kid’s plight, this film is going to be talked about for a long time. I thought Eddie Vedder’s songs for the film were all fairly pointless and just took a few points away. (and now - a week and a half after writing this, I'm starting to come around to the soundtrack a little.)
Grade: A -
If you haven’t heard Artie “coming out” to George Takai on STERN – you haven’t lived.
I AM AN ANIMAL: (HBO)
Unforgettaqble images make the case here for going vegan. I haven’t finished watching because some of the images are so disturbing – but based on the first half, which I plan on finishing shortly, it’s a tough look at THE toughest subject.
Grade based on first half: A +
DEXTER (SHOWTIME)
I watched the last 7 episodes in the last couple of weeks. It’s the best. I was a little worried about the first batch of eps because it felt like a certain laziness had set in, but the next run of eps were uniformly exciting and the finale was pitch perfect and in some ways sort of horrifying. Dexter season 2 has a much more satsisfying conclusion than season one. Despite loads of bad acting (the sister actually got worse this year,) DEXTER is one hell of a show. Last year, they put on a great show. This year, they dazzled.
Grade: A +
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
I still love this show, but there were a lot of misses this season.
Grade: B
DAVE ATTEL: CAPTAIN MISERABLE (HBO)
I really like this guy and think he’s really funny. That said, I didn’t get this standup set at all. I thought it intimated comedy but didn’t really deliver any comedy. Which is not to say it doesn’t have its moments. It’s just few and far between.
Grade: D +
Because it’s not aggressively bad.
AN OPEN LETTER TO GEORGE LOPEZ
I saw you on some TV show the other day, talking about the Amy Winehouse nominations. You said something like "I guess if doing drugs, cutting yourself up gets you the nominations...etc.) - You went on to some very bad punchline that didn't even make the reporter laugh. Now here is the deal, Mister Lopez. How your show is still on the air, is truly a testament to good fucking luck and power of your own personal prayer. The reason she got the nominations is because no matter how fucked up her personal life is, Amy Winehouse is the best female singer to come along in about a decade. And I know late at night, when you think about how talented she is, you probably say to yourself "If I only had that talent, I would never do those fucked up things." Unfortunately, that's something you'll never know about, because as marginally talented as you are, and while you are certainly a success by anyone's measure, you will never know what it's like to be as uniquely talented as someone like Winehouse, so please continue to do your rotten sitcom and remember to thank God the next time you are nominated for anything. And as far as doing fucked up things, you did them all! So what the fuck are you talking about? Really, when it comes to Winehouse, keep your mouth shut, hack.
What's the deal with CHARLIE WILSON'S WAR? Tom Hanks in a movie with Julia Roberts?
JULIA ROBERTS as an old southern belle? Jesus fucking Christ. Does nobody remember "I kissed Sidney Pottier" at the Oscars???? Julia being in a movie in which she could potentially be nominated or even win, or even do a round of talk shows is a BAD BAD THING AND MUST BE STOPPED.
Ryan Seacrest is the only bad thing in KNOCKED UP. His promos on IN DEMAND where he spoofs his role, are so bad my cat recently learned how to change the channel.
GOOD OL' CHARLES SHULZ (PBS)
I am and always will be a huge fan of PEANUTS. It’s been a huge part of my life and it’s the classiest, funniest thing I’d ever read as a kid and kept reading for a long time after. This docu, which has a lot of testimonials from people close to the creator of Peanuts, Charles M. Schultz, and lots of footage of Schultz himself being interviewed. I would’ve liked to have seen the last hour, but TIME/WARNER fucked my shit up and erased everything on my DVR, and it was on PBS, so who knows when it’s be on again – but based on what I saw, and how interesting it managed to be and how Schulz is really a compelling subject….
Grade: A +
HOSTEL 2 (DVD)
Get the unrated version – I think I reviewed this last time, but ended up seeing it again with a friend, and I now think it’s even better than I initially gave it credit for. It’s creepy and funny and about the best they could do for an encore, to the first, better film. But this is pretty fun. The scene in which the various guys around the world are bidding is an instant classic.
Grade: B +
SUPERBAD (DVD – UNRATED EDITION)
This rocked. Maybe not as much as KNOCKED UP, but it's not a really fair comparison. They are two completely different, and hilarious, movies. As far as SUPERBAD goes, not quite everything works. The more outlandish and high-concept some of the bits get, the less fun they play out since this is mostly grounded in reality. But for straight out belly laughs, look no further. And as good as Michael Cera is, Jonah Hill, seen in 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN trying to buy boots at Kathy Keener's Ebay store - and in KNOCKED UP as Seth's fould mouthed friend - becomes a star in this movies. I think this guy could do anything - and he's one of the funniest guys to come around in a while.
Grade: A -
JANICE DICKENSON MODELING AGENCY (OXYGEN)
Janice is insanely unlikable and unpleasant, yet I really like this show, somehow a little better in it’s 3rd season than it was in its second.
BAD GIRLS CLUB (Season 2 – OXYGEN)
The new bad girls appear to be a pretty insane lot, but I don’t think anything will ever compare to the first season girls. They seemed to have personalities beyond the fighting. These girls are just truly insane on every level. And highly entertaining.
Grade: B -
DAVID GILMOUR: REMEMBER THAT NITE (DVD)
One of the best sounding dvds out there, and Gilmour, who has lost a LOT of credit to Roger Waters, IS the voice of Pink Floyd, plays some of the best guitar in the business, and has a lot of new great songs, particularly, SMILE. Plus the entire Pink Floyd cannon. Here, he performs COMFORTABLY NUMB with David Bowie and an acoustic version of SHINE ON with Crosby, Stills and Nash. Astonishing.
Grade: A
IN POT WE TRUST (SHOWTIME)
Very fine Showtime docu on people who really need medical marijuana. Don't we all?
Grade: B
REBA (SYND)
I recently took in a few eps of this while I was cleaning my apt. I think the success of this show is pretty good proof that the yahoos are winning.
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Da bomb. Bring this one back. I will never look at any restaurant the same way again, and Gordon Ramsey is a TV natural. Great subjects, great episodes.
Grade: B +
A SHOT AT LOVE W/ TILA TEQUILA (MTV)
I’m going to try and imitate Tila’s sing-song voice to try and convey how annoying she sounds. (She does this a lot when she’s trying to sound important.) Okay, so – this is Tila talking, and when she raises her voice, I’ll use caps. Tila Tequila: “Okay, so like, I brought them to my STUDIO. Where I’m a RECORDING ARTIST. And like, my producer has worked with PARIS HILTON and LINDSEY LOHAN, and now, most importantly, TILA TEQUILA.” I’m not kidding – I wish I could record a sample of what I mean and post it – I’m sure I could find a perfect you tube clip, but I’m too lazy to add these links that would make this a better blog. Tila looks kind of strange. Not that she’s ugly, she’s just…kind of weird. So – this was a dating show with a twist – Tila supposedly wanted to figure out if she wanted to end up with a guy or a girl. Tila: “I’m coming out now and it’s really IMPORTANT to me. And I don’t know if I want a GUY or a GIRL or what…” Now, the show was great, had great characters, truly some real fucking maniacs, and the conclusion was interesting enough. But I think it’s all bullshit. I’ve heard from a lot of people that Tila has a boyfriend, and is totally hetero (the scenes of her kissing other women didn’t really came off as authentic.) So I guess this was to promote her music career. Her what? I’ve heard some of it, and I prefer to listen to the SPIDERMAN THREE album. Oh my GOD, I’m talking like TILA now…I wonder if because she has a sing-song voice she thought she could sing?
Grade: C
How annoying do the new ads for PS I LOVE YOU with Hilary Swank look? How annoying is Hilary Swank? Bleeeeeeeeeeeeeech.
Remember when NIP/TUCK used to be smart, sexy, and daring? Now it’s one shitbag story after the other. And isn’t it funny how after they exploited living in Los Angeles for a few episodes, now the show could take place back in Miami for all of it’s CALIFORNIA vibe it wants to have? Honestly – the time has come. Maybe Ryan Murphy can come up with a great batch of episodes to finish this out – but this is the worst show on television. Let’s let all these talented people go on to something new and fresh and not this grim reminder of a once vibrant tv show that actually was cutting edge for its first few seasons.
I saw a few minutes of the HD BLADE RUNNER FINAL CUT at BEST BUY – it looked amazing I want to update every single component I own. It looks truly insane in HD. I’m ready to buy into this technology. I think the way to go is the hybrid HD/BLU RAY machine that plays both. And whoever reads this blog, if you wanted to get me a 70” HD PANASONIC, I would definitely not mind, nor accuse you of trying to buy my friendship.
IDEAS FOR XMAS/CHANUKA (Under 30 bux)
(Sorry – I should’ve had this blog posted 2 weeks ago, but I’ve been busy. So here it is, anyway – still a good way to spend 30 bux.)
1 - Meatloaf - 3 Bats Live
Meat's voice doesn't sound the same, and replacing Patti Russo with a 20 year old was a blunder, but this dvd still kind of rocks.
2 - Tom Petty - Runnin' Down A Dream (dvd at Best Buy only)
I think this is 8 hours long - for serious Petty fans only (I'm not one)
3 - Eagles - Long Road Out Of Eden (Walmart Only - but you can find it on Amazon)
This rocks.
4 - Led Zep - Mothership CD/DVD
Not a huge fan, but supposedly this is fantastic if you are.
5 - Knocked up DVD
Best comedy of the year.
6 - Superbad DVD
Based on the first 10 minutes of which I’ve seen, this is awesome.
7 - WINDY CITY HEAD DVD (always a great stocking stuffer)
Funniest. Movie. Ever.
8 - BLADE RUNNER - THE FINAL CUT (DVD - 2 dvd set)
Apparantly this is THE DIRECTOR'S CUT with some cleaning up of the film and some choice commentary and documentaries - but if you don't have it yet, it's a must have.
9 - CALIGULA Ultimate Edition (2 DVD SET)
Need I say more?
10 - FREAKS & GEEKS - THE ENTIRE SERIES (okay, this one might cost you more then 30, but well worth it)
This show was the bomb. NBC cancelled it, but these guys now seem unstoppable.
11 - THE OFFICE (BBC) - THE ENTIRE SERIES (my highest reccomendation)The best sitcom ever, on a shelf with Seinfeld and The Honeymooners.
LASTLY....
If you don't get the STERN RADIO SHOW on SIRIUS yet, you are only cheating yourself from the hands down funniest dialog you are ever likely to hear in your lifetime.
That’s a wrap for the year.
Don’t drink & drive.
2007/11/25
NIP/TUCK, WEEDS, DEXTER, INTO THE WILD and HOSTEL II!
Okay, so, the last blog was a bit ambitious with all those fucking links. However, I did have lots of pictures that I was going to put in this post - but for some reason I can't seem to work it that well - so - here is the "unplugged" version if you will - enjoy.
By the way, why does CBS keep hyping the Heather Locklear appearance on RULES OF ENGAGEMENT as if it were the second coming?
NIP/TUCK (FX) (5th season)
Well - they said that the move to LA would be really good for the show and revitalize the whole franchise. And it did! For one full episode! By episode two, the by now expected dramatic retardation had began and by eps 3, 4 & 5, they're already bringing back Julia in a new SHOCKING lesbian relationship!!! They've given Julia a softer haircut, but she still remains....kind of a blank. She's definitely not the sort of dynamo that Portia DiRossi would fall for - at least you'd think. In fact, their whole lesbian love affair is about the phoniest thing in this show about plastic surgery. They don't even resemble a real couple and Julia is as cold a fish as she was in season 1. And their "taboo" relationship?" In this day and age???? Give me a break - this is 2007 and they're treating this lesbian relationship like it was the very first one on tv. And it all revolves around DiRossi's daughter! But between all the Julia stuff, her girlfriend's scheming daughter (we've see a version of this character in every single season.) - the juvenile bullshit between the two leads as to who's really running the best game in town...it's just all so...wretchedly bad. Sean is dating an actress who shit the jacuzzi on ex-lax. I'm sure that was funny in the writer's room - on screen it was worth a chuckle I guess - but really, is this portrayal of a neurotic female tv star so engaging and new? And then more trouble with Matt and Kimber? This is starting to feel like outtakes from last year. But you gotta hand it to them, last year, they refurbished the show and it took about 7 episodes before it slid into bad camp. This year it only took them 4 to completely jump the shark, the rails, and the grand canyon. And Rosie O'Donnel and Oliver Platt? Is this really what passes as "innovative" these days? My God, Rosie is so bad on this show, with the "comical" New Yawk accent - what is this world coming to where people think that this is somehow funny? After the thrilling first episode, it seems like they have gone to every single cliche' ever built about Los Angeles, then dumbed it down by about 100. I think it's time for an intervention here - someone needs to have the strength to simply put the bullet into the head of this show that it's been begging for ever since THE CARVER storyline wrapped up. Stop the madness! This is truly becoming the most brain-dead hour on television.
Grade: D -(saved from an F for the occasional outrageous scene.)
DEXTER (SHOWTIME)
What happened, Dex? Season 1 was about the coolest thing on TV. The murders were horrifying, Dexter was unique, scary, dynamic - season 1 was so very good it made you forget it sported some of the worst acting on tv (the sister, the captain, the captain's captain, Dokes, etc.) - Season 2, which should have been superb, based on the fact that they really came up with a fantastic storyline where they find all of Dexter's bodies - but instead of a pulse pounding energy, we get this very lazily played chess game with Dexter slowly going through the motions as if this was the 8Th season. The sister's acting is worse then ever, and this bullshit about Dexter being on Heroin is really kind of dumb. I hope this show gets better, but for season 2, this is not very impressive. Season 2 is supposed to deepen the pool, not make it more shallow. Still, the tone is still right on the money and it is more interesting then other dramas currently on the air, so I'm hanging in there.
Grade: B -
WEEDS (SHOWTIME)
Finally, a show that goes into different territory for their third season. WEEDS seems to reinvent itself on some level every year, and this season was no different, with the actions and consequences of what these characters are up to finally coming to a very nasty head. Mary Louise Parker is frighteningly good and real in this role, and truly makes this whole thing work. Kevin Nealon is funnier then ever this year, they found a great way to bring Celia into the action, U-Turn was great this year, the romance between Nancy and Conrad is one I've always found compelling, and despite Nancy's low standards this year in choosing who to sleep with, I've always thought she should end up with Conrad. Hunter Parish as Nancy's son Silas has really developed as a character as well - though, I'm sad to report, the addition of Mary Kate Olsen in the role of the Church-loving weed slinging new girlfriend of Silas is more a step in the right direction for Mary Kate's career rather then a good direction for this show. When I heard about it, I thought it was interesting casting and I would love to see if Mary Kate, after all those tabloid years, can really act - and the answer is - she can - but not very compellingly and she didn't really offer much in this series. She reminds me of a beginning actor who just got her first job but wasn't really able to do much with it - even though it was a great role and I can only imagine what a better actress would've done with it. But I'm quibbling, this was a great, funny and very scary season and as usual - they had a scorched earth ending that doesn't leave the show much room to go - yet something tells me that WEEDS will find a way - it always does. Like real weeds themselves, this show always seems to get into areas you never thought you'd find it - and a special thanks for treating us to some Lexington Steele this year!
Grade: A
MR. BROOKS (DVD)
This was really good, though there appeared to be two simultaneous movies going on at the same time. Mr. Brooks, Kevin Costner, is the MAN OF THE YEAR (in a very tired, exhausted movie cliche at the beginning when he accepts his award - these "MAN OF THE YEAR" ceremonies are almost now a dead give a way that something is horribly wrong with the person receiving the award. Nonetheless, Costner is excellent at the man "addicted to murder" - no spoilers, this happens in the first 3 minutes of the film. Dane Cook, the world's very worst and most pathetic comic maybe ever, turns up as an overactor (Yup, he stink in comedy and he's pretty awful in drama) - yet, Cook does his very best ever here in this role, which, is not saying much. Still, he is not distracting enough to kill the movie. William Hurt plays Costner's devil on his shoulder, talking to him about the killings in imaginary conversations. And the newly minted mouth of Demi Moore (Have you seen her refurbished choppers? They're ready to take a bite out of a Sycamore tree) - stars here as a LIFETIME style of TV COP slowly trying to uncover the murder - and once again, even though she kind of sucks, the story is so intriguing that you get pulled in regardless. It also gets confusing when Mr. Brooks starts crossing his storyline with Demi Moore's weirdo divorce storyline. I'm not going to reveal specific plot points, but as much as this film has going against it, what it has going for it is a terrific perf. from Costner and Hurt, and a truly interesting screenplay. Recommended.
Grade: B -
INTO THE WILD (In Theatres - Rated R)
Written and directed by Sean Penn, in what is probably the best film he's ever made, this follows the true life story of a privileged young man (Emille Hirsh - almost always great) who decides to give his college fund away and go live in the wild. While we get bits of info on how his home life was riddled with hypocrisy and minor violence - both emotional and physical- we never really get exactly why this young man has decided to embark upon a journey to Alaska to live among the wild. I remember hearing about this kid when I was younger and there was - at the time - a big deal made out of the fact that he spent 9 weeks in an abandoned bus in Alaska and the fact that he kept a journal that represented the lunacy he was entering into. I remember at the time his biggest regret is that he killed a moose, and even though it's not portrayed in the film, this moose was his friend in the wilderness, he finally killed it for food, then completely botched eating it as maggots and creatures got ahold of the moose before he could eat it - and he truly regretted killing his friend and it haunted him for the rest of the days. While that sequence isn't given that kind of weight in the film, it's here, along with a host of other great characters he runs into on his journey into the wild. I guess my biggest problem with the film - which is truly shot in luminous and 70s style widescreen - it's a GREAT looking film, although i didn't really get the Eddie Vedder soundtrack, frankly - was that we never truly got into the kid's head. It ultimately seemed that he just wanted to be a guy on this romantic journey of being alone in the woods - but it felt....a little weak. I think a bit more into his psychic pain might have made this journey a bit more meaningful - still, pretty good stuff.
Grade: B
I LOVE NY 2 (VH1)
I just saw the ep where the Taylor-Made basically fought with everyone - fantastic.I watched a few more, including watching NEW YORK take that moron with her to the NIP/TUCK set, get farted on by her suitor (hilarious) and then get fawned over by NIP/TUCK creator RYAN MURPHY - and the scenes they filmed with Tiffany look like further evidence that I LOVE NY is probably more realistic then NIP/TUCK at this point. Maybe Ryan should not have looked so supremely satisfied with himself.
Grade: B -
SCARLETT DIVA (DVD)
This was made and directed by Asia Argento - the Italian sexpot who is the daughter of DARIO ARGENTO - a horror film maven from Italy who handled editing the Italian release/version of DAWN OF THE DEAD. In fact, Asia has a major role in the DAWN remake. All that aside - I had heard this film had tons of nudity and graphic sex - untrue. It's just a trippy little film about the plight of an actress who sleeps with almost everyone in her path, and it's not particularly compelling.
Grade: C -
EAGLES NEW CD AGAIN (WALMART)
I know I've already reviewed this, but really - WAITING IN THE WEEDS and LONG ROAD OUT OF EDEN are already instant EAGLES classics - download them at once.
REM "LIVE" (Double CD and DVD)
I'm a big fan of REM - but they haven't made a relevant CD in years and years. This double live set resurrects some of the high points of the last 2 decades, but comes too late and with too many half-baked late 90s songs. I haven't seen the dvd of this show yet, but it's all just sort of expertly recorded REM mediocrity.
Grade: C -
DAMAGES (FX)
I recently watched all 13 eps of this in the span of a week. Completely addicting - Danson and Close are revelations - particularly Danson. Close is doing sort of a variation of her FATAL ATTRACTION bitch with more finesse. I can't stand the actress who plays the new young attorney, nor can I remember her name, but thought she went from "innocent" to "hardened" in a unrealistic amount of time and the actor herself was quite unconvincing in her more "dangerous" personal. With the exception of a terrible final 5 minutes of the finale', this twisty legal thriller was a great example of off-network television at its very wicked best. I just heard they were renewed for 2 more seasons - this is a good thing.
GRADE: A -
PRISON BREAK (FOX)
Okay, I'm pissed - TIVO broke down and erased my whole PRISON BREAK block. JOE H. - I know you read this blog - please get me the dvds of the eps I missed (I only got to see the first 2 eps of the season.) I'm serious - this is one of my very favorite shows and I missed all but the first 2 eps - if someone has all these - including JOE H. - please contact me and get them to me?
HOGAN FAMILY (VH1)
"Brooke Breaks The Bank"
The most over-produced reality show of all time keeps getting more scripted. Soon they should ADD laugh track. Still, The Hulk is never less than compelling. Even when he is just following instructions from the producers.
Grade: C -
UPDATE: Just heard about the Hogan's upcoming divorce - I wonder if they'll continue to follow Hulk on his solo journey.
MAD MEN
The best show on tv. Period. If you're not watching it, you should be. If you are watching it, you should be ordering the soon to come 1st season dvd set. This is a ultra-cool show about advertising agents in the 60s, written and conceived by brilliant SOPRANOS scribe Mathew Weiner - this is a show that brings back subtlety, yet within these small moments, entire continents crash and burn. The most searing, original show since THE SOPRANOS. With maybe the best office boss, EVER.
Grade: A +
CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM (HBO)
Started weak, then got strong (the freak book ep was priceless), then they got into this thing with Cheryl leaving Larry - which was interesting. Then he made a wretched creative decision about the "choosing" of marital sides - I don't know. I watch, but I don't always like.
Grade: B -
UPDATE:
I just watched the season finale and found it to be near perfect. I'm dying to know if they go in that direction for next year.
FINALE GRADE: A
TELL ME YOU LOVE ME (HBO)
I kind of like this show - though it was never as sexually explicit as it was in the pilot. The characters represent a sort of "generations" of sexual couplings - I really like some of the acting although the sex scenes always feel a little strange to me for some reason. There is a 70s like earnestness to this show - at least in the initial batch of eps - and the "young woman" on the show seems to be doing a realy bad Sarah Silverman impression. That said - there is much to recommend about this show - and the universal truth of it is that marriage truly can be an illusion, and this relationship show really needs to up the ante in their next 6 episodes if they want to create an illusion as well.
Still on the fence, but at the moment:
Grade: C +
KNOCKED UP (DVD - unrated version)
I'm sure you've all seen it - I recommend the unrated version just because it's a tad bit dirtier, but this is a great, hilarious, touching film that nobody should miss because it's one of the very best of the year. That said, the double-disc version has TONS of extras. Highly recommended.
Grade: A +
THE STREET (DVD - BBC)
A fantastic BBC show that I just started watching. It's about the entanglements and lives of the people who live on this particular street in London, and the acting is realistic and the storytelling stellar, though I've only seen the first 2 (I think out of 9.)
Grade: B
America's Next Top Model (The CW)
I actually took this season off my DVR. It was just that....generic.
RULES OF ENGAGEMENT (CBS)
More of the same, but like last year, I liked it.
Grade: C +
LIFE (NBC)
Really cool, really quirky and really well executed. If you're looking for a real twist in the police procedural, look no further than this whip-smart procedural. And remember the girl who Tony Soprano partied with in Las Vegas this season - she's here as the lead detective (Sarah Sashi.) And Damion Lewis is perfection as the cop with the mysterious past. Seriously - this is different. Watch it.
Grade: A
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN - MAGIC
Bruce's first E STREET CD in a few years, this is not the sprawling amost-epic that THE RISING was. That said, this is a fun, hard rockin' BORN IN THE USA style album. RADIO NOWHERE is one of Bruce's catchiest tunes in years. Many of the songs sound a bit like updates of classic Bruce tunes. YOU'LL BE COMING DOWN sounds like another Bruce song I can't put my finger on. LIVING IN THE FUTURE sounds like a cross between 10th AVE FREEZE OUT and GLORY DAYS. I prefer the originals. YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY sounds like a wall of sound that could've fit on BORN TO RUN - although the lyrics are somewhat trite. GIRLS IN THEIR SUMMER CLOTHES arrives like a instant Springsteen classic, and succeeds wildly where WAITIN' ON A SUNNY DAY sort of failed. I'LL WORK FOR YOUR LOVE opens with some classic Springsteen piano - but ultimately doesn't really go anywhere. MAGIC is original, quiet and really cool. Maybe the best track on the CD. LAST TO DIE is war-themed song that work really well due to Bruce's impassioned vocals. LONG WALK HOME is cool, if forgettable. I liked DEVIL'S ARCADE a lot. TERRY'S SONG - Bruce's tribute to his fallen asst. Terry of 25 years is sort of beautiful - and there it is. The nice thing is that there is a great variety if no real theme here, the band sounds great, but the mix itself is unforgivably muddy. More often than not, the band sounds louder than Bruce. Still, going on 30 years, Bruce still kicks out these interesting records. I just wish it were as great as his ambition.
Grade: B -
Been really getting into PINK FLOYD lately - I've always loved THE WALL, DARK SIDE and THE FINAL CUT. Recently I started listening to ANIMALS and WISH YOU WERE HERE. ANIMALS is great, but WISH YOU WERE HERE is a masterpiece. As for live Floyd, you can't go wrong with the DVD of the Roger Waters' show IN THE FLESH. But you might be better off with the later incarnation of Floyd without Waters - the David Gilmour dvd of PULSE is fantastic. He does pretty much everything - and let's face it - Waters might be the mastermind behind Floyd, but it's Gilmour's guitar work and voice that has always been the signature sound of Floyd.
DARK SIDE OF THE MOON - A + *if you have a 5.1 system you MUST get the 5.1 mix dvd.
WISH YOU WERE HERE - A (Did we really need the SHINE ON reprise?)
ANIMALS - B (not as lofty as the above, but pretty great in it's own right.)
THE WALL - A + (Comfortably Numb might be there greatest moment, ever.)
THE FINAL CUT - B + (a most overlooked cd, the last waters/Gilmour collaboration and mostly sounding like a Waters solo work, but still pretty great.)
PINK FLOYD ON DVD
ROGER WATERS - IN THE FLESH? - A
PINK FLOYD - PULSE - A +
ALIENS IN AMERICAN (THE CW)
I've only seen the pilot, but can say this is easily the funniest show on the CW since MAYBE IT'S ME. The lead actor with his sad-sack voice over is truly hilarious, and the vibe of the show is off kilter enough that it draws you right in to the story of a high schooler who must take in a Pakistani foreign exchange student.
Grade: A
dirty sexy money (ABC)
WAY better than I had figured - this might be one of the best new shows of the season. Peter Krause is great as is just about everyone in this deliciously take on the rich, the righteous and the have-nots.
Grade: B
HOUSE, MD (FOX)
Thought the season premier was good but think that ep #2 where House starts to decide who to pick for his new diagnosis team was kind of great. I'm behind on this show by about 4 eps, so I'll do more in a future blog.
Grade: A
ROCK OF LOVE FINALE
I loved this whole show - I LOVED Rodeo, Brandy C. and Brandy M. (both can be seen in online porn as dirty as anything you've ever seen) and I thought Shannon was very pretty, very insane, and VERY entertaining. I loved Heather's 80s porno hair and her Bride Of Frankenstein makeup (made even funnier by the fact that every time Heather was scene sans makeup, she was kind of beautiful. But in the end, I think Mr. Michaels made exactly the right choice. But what is Heather going to do with that tatoo?
GRADE: B +
UPDATE:
I watched the reunion special. So the cool Jen chick he picked turned out to be there for publicity and somehow came off as the fakest one in the pack - amazing. And Heather, who has now ruined her appearance with a medley of completely unnessary bad plastic surgery (all she needed to do was wash away the bad 80s makeup and redesign the porno hairstyle - she was a beautiful girl) is poised to go out with Brett? But will he still want her now that she's had more surgery then Liza Minilli?
The Sad Case of PEREZ HILTON and BRITTNY SPEARS.
I personally think Perez is obsessed with Brit. When he shows Brittny just sitting in her car being surrounded by the flashbulbs of the paparazzi (ie, scumbags) which to me resemble a swarm of flies descending on this confused but human young woman, Perez, whose site I must admit I read daily - but when he sits there kissing the ass of Paris and Angela Jolie and he tells Britt that she must "Stay Home!" - I wonder who the fuck Hilton thinks he is. Not that he's not entertaining, I just think he's an asshole. And his tv show, as bloodless as his blog is blood thirsty. Just Perez kissing the ass of every celeb he could possibly find. I'm thinking TMZ tv does it a bit better - though not by much. But on my original point, Perez seems to be absolutely obsessed with Britt long after our obsession has died down. What's wrong with this guy? Clearly, he has a massive talent as far as cobbling these stories together, but this seems to be just a mean-spirited vendetta against a really wayward confused young lady. BY the way, is it even possible to drive with 2000 paparazzi surrounding your car and the bulbs going off and NOT running over their feet - I defy anyone out there to figure that one out. What about the harrassment of Britney by the Pap?
I still miss THE SOPRANOS and thought they were ROBBED at the Emmys in the acting awards, especially for Gandolfini, Edie Falco and Michael Imperiolli. That the moron who plays Janice got nominated - well - Ryan Seacrest was hosting (after a decent monolouge, his uselessness became really apparent.)
James Spader should've been ashamed to take that Emmy home, especially since BOSTON LEGAL stopped being a real show about 3 seasons ago.
UPDATE: BOSTON LEGAS is SLIGHTLY better this year - still ridiculous.
THE SARAH SILVERMAN SHOW (DEBUT)
The way Sarah lamented her abortions to Green Day's "GOOD RIDDANCE" must be seen to be believed. Watch it here:
http://sarahsilverman.comedycentral.com/index.jhtml?c=vc&videoId=103794
HOWARD STERN SHOW
Has been great as ever, but the Dr. Keith Abalow session with Sal and Christine was the show at it's best. And Artie's impression of "emotional friend" is one for the ages.
UPDATE:
On the air, and then on HOWARD TV, I saw the trilogy of shows revolving around one of the shows most epic fights ever between Artie, Sal & Richard. I believe Howard could take two hours out of that conflict and release it as a movie. And it has the best ending ever.
BEST WEEK EVER is really, really funny.
FLIGHT OF THE CHONCORDS (HBO)
I saw the pilot, LOVED IT, for some reason never watched it again.
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Chef Gordon Ramsey is great tv, unfortunately, they already aired the first few explosive episodes (Gordon once found an infestation of bugs in an Indian resturaunt.) But now the places he's helping aren't that bad off. The worse the resturaunt, the better the show usually is.
Grade: B
THIS FILM IS NOT YET RATED (DVD)
Fascinating docu on the ratings board. Reccomended.
Grade: B
ZODIAC (DVD)
Really, really artfully done, well acting, and BORING. Sorry, but at 2 hours and forty five minutes (the director's cut) I never made it all the way to the end.
Grade: ???
DEATH PROOF (DVD)
This was the first half of GRINDHOUSE, which we all know was two movies in one. They stripped away the second movie (Released on its own,) added a disc of extras and gave this film an extra 40 minutes. I have a feeling the film was better with a shorter running time, because it's more a cool idea with some nifty scenes rather than a full fledged film, however, it's a fun ride, it's a Tarantino so that means some juicy dialog, a great lap dance scene (omitted from the original release) and some needless extra filler of some not-so-greatly delivered Q dialoge. On the whole, this is a very worthwhile endeavor. The movie has a fantastic look and feel from the 70s and a GREAT blistering lead performance in Kurt Russel, though he comes off much better in the first half then the very repetitive second half. Killer soundtrack. The extras are mostly about how they filmed the stunts for the film (which were not CGI'd) and some generic behind the scenes stuff. If you're a fan of Quentin, even though this isn't a fully realized film - you gotta see it. Even more importantly, I wish they would eventually release the whole thing on DVD - the two movies, the faux trailers - I mean, they have to, right?
Grade: B+
KID NATION
This bored me too much - I left after the 2nd commercial break. Did I miss anything?
HALLOWEEN (NOT YET ON DVD)
Fairly pointless remake with Rob Zombie (the great, DEVIL'S REJECTS) helming the retelling of this classic story. We get a LOT more of young Michael and how he became a killer, but once the movie shifts to HALLOWEEN night, which is where the majority of the original film took place, it becomes almost a bad shot for shot remake, with Rob not really adding much to what we already know and have seen. Reccomended, but barely. By the way, Rob manages to get in every player from DEVIL'S REJECTS in starring roles and cameos here - sounds like Mr. Zombie is very happy with his little acting troupe. The last guy to do that a lot was George A. Romero.
Grade: B -
THE SHOOTER (DVD)
Coming from Antoin Fuqua, who directed TRAINING DAY (an A) - I expected a lot more than this insanely predictable tale of Marky Mark pretending to be a great sharp shooter. It was needlessly complicated and very boring mixed with utter predictablity.
HOSTEL II (DVD)
ALIENS IN AMERICA (THE CW)
Continues to get funnier and funnier. Now the dad is getting in on the comedy, and he's especially adept at it - this is truly a great show and if you aren't watching it, really - check it out.
Grade: A
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
The episode in which Peter finds out he is an illegal alien was wrenchingly funny.
Grade: B +
THE SARAH SILVERMAN SHOW (COM)
The second season proves as devlish as the first, with Sarah, at this time, being the funniest woman on television. The recent episode in which she did battle on the COOKIE SHOW was masterful in its irreverence. I also loved the ep about her maid being deported and the revelation that Brian is into SPIN DOCTORS (they spoofed the video - hilarious) and that Jay is into "Gentle Comedy."
Grade: A
Speaking of which, I though Jimmy Kimmel killed, as usual, at the American Music Awards, and the current issue of PLAYBOY has a GREAT article on Jimmy, which becomes a bit of a love song to both Jimmy and Sarah, and reveals very much of both. It's one of the best articles I've read about Jimmy and it's highly reccomended.
HOSTEL II (DVD)
A worthy follow up, though not nearly as scary or original as the first, this does continue the mythology and puts enough of a twist on the first movie to have a right to exist. There is a bit too much dumb dialoge, the girls are not really fleshed out, and Eli Roth, as a director, does far worse to Heather Matarazzo then all the bullies did to her as Dawn Weiner in WELCOME TO THE DOLLHOUSE (An "A" movie, by the way.) The extras are really plentiful, and in some ways more entertaining then the film - but - at 90 minutes this is enjoyable enough with some truly inspired moments. When I was a kid I used to watch ANOTHER WORLD which is a now-defunct soap opera on NBC. I doubt anyone reading this remembers, but before Richard Burgi became a USA NETWORK SENSATION in a forgettable drama, he was the evil pimp CHAD in that show - here, he's just as evil.
Grade: B -
That's it for now.
Coming:
CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM (new season)
SHOOTER (DVD)
MARGOT AT THE WEDDING (IN THEATRES)
3 10 TO YUMA (DVD SCREENER)
2007/11/04
The Digital Couch returns!
CALIFORNICATION (SHOWTIME)
http://television.aol.com/show/californication/1342172/main?flv=1&ncid=yInozwVMCu0000000742&icid=rbox_tv_shows.M
Okay, once you get over the concept that on this show - every single female in the world, straight and bi, wants to fuck David Duchovny, this becomes an enjoyable show that tries very hard to expose the pain and loathing that tags along with sex, drugs and debauchery. They don't quite hit the mark - but get close enough and some of the stories are truly memorable. Duchovny plays Hank Moody, a novelist whose book got turned into a high grossing shitty movie, so he's angry at the world. (Most can only wish for these problems.) Moody still holds a torch for his ex wife who he shares a child with, and some of the sex scenes go pretty far on the outrageous meter. The entire show though, is pretty much stolen from Duchovny by Evan Handler, who plays Hank's agent. Though his storyline seems directly lifted out of SECRETARY, the very good James Spader film, there is something very real about Handler (you might remember him as Charlotte's lawyer boyfriend on SEX AND THE CITY. The apex of the show probably hits when the two ex-wives walk in during a 3 way between Hank, Handler and a very foxy lady who covers Handler's face with a special talent. While all the stuff with Mia (sorry, you have to know the show) and the way that Handler gets his new associate and all the stuff with them and the stolen (supposedly genius book) written by Hank...it's too complicated - needless to say, for a show about Hollywood, it doesn't seem to really have any idea of the way things actually work. And while the conclusion was very satisfying - the last 2 minutes undid much good will towards the show I only hope if this makes it to season 2, that this last minute piss poor plot twist (a very bad GRADUATE homage) was just fantasy. Still - recommended.
Grade: B -
DIRTY SEXY MONEY (ABC)
http://television.aol.com/show/dirty-sexy-money/1342101/main?flv=1&ncid=oyjqUzrKfk0000000465&icid=rbox_tv_shows.M
I haven't seen all of these, (my dvr got wiped a few weeks ago and I lost HOURS of programming) I've really liked what I've seen.
Grade: B
I just heard from THE SURF REPORT that HBO is airing a series finale' of EXTRAS. This is cause of celebration. Now if only they could give a proper ending to DEADWOOD (though I contend the final episode would probably serve as a better finale' than one they would construct), get THE SOPRANOS to do a few more seasons (sorry, there's nothing else like it) and do another season of Lisa Kudrow's ill fated THE COMEBACK....now that would be something.
Speaking of finale's, how outrageous is it that Seinfeld wanted to shoot another final episode of SEINFELD to coincide with the new box set? Jerry - PLEASE do the episode anyway and erase memories of your own season final - the worst in the entire 9 year run. Speaking of which, I've been watching season 4 again on DVD and THE CHEEVER LETTERS might be one of the funniest eps they've ever done. But really, for the sake of humanity, Jerry - give us a proper ending to the greatest comedy of all time! (Along with the Honeymooners and The Office BBC)
THE FLY (DVD - DAVID CRONENBERG REMAKE)
http://www.amazon.com/Fly-Two-Disc-Collectors-Jeff-Goldblum/dp/B0009X768W/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194225656&sr=8-1
Fox recently released this 80s classic in a great 2-disc set. While I have not yet gone through the oodles and oodles of extras, the centerpiece remains the story of a man, Jeff Goldblum, a shy scientist who strikes up a very unlikely romance with the adorable reporter Geena Davis. Goldblum has created a machine that can transport entities through time, and I had forgotten how truly spectacular the effects were, the acting of Goldblum (I think he was nominated), and how incredibly sad a story this was. And the writing and direction is truly topnotch, as it mines many of Cronenberg's favorite obsessions. An creepy, dreadful masterpiece and a lesson in efficient storytelling.
Grade: A +
TAXI DRIVER (DVD)
http://www.amazon.com/Taxi-Driver-Two-Disc-Collectors-Robert/dp/B000R8YC18/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194226132&sr=1-1
They just did a 2 disc reissue of this, but I just watched the 2 disc reissue I bought a few years ago. What a great, intense and fascinating movie. DeNiro is perfect, as is Jodie Foster and every other element of the film. There is not one false note here, and DeNiro's speed taking, alcohol swigging street avenger is just as powerful now as it was 30 years ago. The bomb. And Scorsesee's first great movie (MEAN STREETS was good - this is great.)
Grade: A +
EAGLES "Long Road Out Of Eden" (CD - first Eagles CD in 23 years!)
http://www.amazon.com/Eagles-Long-Road-Eden-Release/dp/B000XQX6H0/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=miscellaneous&qid=1194226796&sr=1-1
I can't believe as I write this blog, my first in a few months, I'm listening to the first Eagle's CD - I think - in 23 years (The Long Run was I believe released in 79 or something like that.) There are 20 new songs here that barely qualify as a double disc (if they'd ridden themselves of 3 songs, they'd be a single disc.) Actually - "How Long" which sort of sounds like "Take It Easy," is an unrecorded song from the 70s era that sounds exactly like it just came off THE BEST OF THE EAGLES. Frey and Henley's vocals have never sound crisper and the band, including the awesome Joe Walsh, is as tight as ever. They've apparently been working on this for 5 years, and 1 song that appears here "No More Cloudy Days" appeared on 2005's THE FIRST FAREWELL DVD. Another song to be included from that DVD was a great song by Joe Walsh called "One Day At A Time" but somehow didn't make it to this collection. "Cloudy Days" is GREAT by the way with a killer Glen Frey vocal. My friend, Dave D., recently pointed out to me how far these guys had gotten away from greatness - at one point Frey had a minor hit with SMUGGLER'S BLUES and even acted on MIAMI VICE as the smuggler with the blues. Jesus. I also think it's interesting that they are clearly labelled now as "country rock" - somehow I never saw them that way, but between that self promotion of country and the fact that the CD will only be available at Walmart exclusively for the next year (Shame on you, Don Henley - after all your corporate screaming) - this all seems to be part of a financial arrangement to market specifically to the Midwest. This is a shame because the CD is really good and feels like it came right after THE LONG RUN with no seams showing. Maybe a few too many shitty ballads, but mostly this CD rocks hard and makes you remember why you loved The Eagles in the first place. Standouts: "Waiting In The Weeds, No More Cloudy Days, You Are Not Alone, Long Road Out Of Eden (a new 10 minute Eagles masterpiece - well, maybe I need to hear it more to proclaim masterpiece, but it sounds really good, definitely in the vein of "the last resort" and other classics,) I Dreamed There Was No War, Somebody, Last Good Time In Town (a new Joe Walsh/Eagles classic in the vein of Life's Been Good,) Center Of The Universe and It's Your World Now. The Eagles are definitely back, and I think that's a good thing. If they can make their next CD in less time, that'll be a great thing - but still - this is a gift to the true believers.
Grade: B +
MICK JAGGER "BEST OF MICK SOLO" (CD/DVD)
http://www.amazon.com/Very-Best-Mick-Jagger-Dvd/dp/B000V9M0E4/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1194227730&sr=8-2
Good collection, but how's they miss PARADISE and BRAND NEW SET OF RULES? The best 2 solo Mick offerings EVER! And where is STATE OF SHOCK with Michael Jackson? (Just kidding.)
Grade: B
ELTON JOHN AT 60: MADISON SQUARE GARDEN
http://www.amazon.com/Elton-60-Madison-Square-Garden/dp/B000UZD4AS/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194228203&sr=8-2
One of the best Elton packages ever offered, EVER! This has him at his 60th birthday at Madison Square Garden belting out around 40 songs in perfect pitch, and there's about 24 more archival performances of his. This pretty much covers everything. Even though I will always love the ONE NIGHT ONLY dvd, this will be the one I watch for a while. There are like - 64 songs on here - and all are in stellar versions - the 5.1 mix is superb - this is one of the best Elton dvds ever produced, and Elton sings like a champ. At 60 years old, this fucker is still doing it.
Grade: A +
JOHN FOGERTY "Revival"
Great - kind of sounds like a Clearwater CD. His best collection since CENTERFIELD.
Grade: B
JACKASS 2 (DVD)
http://www.amazon.com/Jackass-Number-Unrated-Willie-Garson/dp/B000JLTRJK/ref=pd_bbs_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194228661&sr=1-1
I recently re-watched this with some friends and forgot just how profanely funny this is. And I also could not believe that none of these guys have ended up dead yet. But Knoxville and Co. are some inventive, funny mother fuckers. Some of the bits here are off the charts, but for my money, the switcheroo involving Bam's dad and an impostor might be the funniest thing I've seen in ages. But I think the main attraction here is the commoradirty between the guys - their good naturedness towards each other in the face of personal atrocities perpetrated on each other is truly admirable. And "Grandpa's Balls" has to be seen to be believed.
Grade: A
I LOVE NEW YORK 2 (VH1)
http://www.vh1.com/shows/series/i_love_new_york_2/splash.jhtml
Twice as outrageous as last year and about twice as staged. Definitely off the MUST WATCH list, due to the obvious prodding and scripting by producers. Even New York's mom, complete with a whole new makeover which makes her almost indistinguishable from her daughter, seems to be in on the storylining this year. Why can't reality shows just let shit HAPPEN?
Grade: C -
FLAVA FLAV ROAST (COM CENTRAL)
http://www.amazon.com/Comedy-Central-Roast-Flavor-Flav/dp/B000V2SQ80/ref=pd_bbs_sr_5/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=digital-video&qid=1194228970&sr=8-5
Jimmy Kimmel killed, as did Ross Schwartz, and this was one of the funniest roasts Comedy Central has ever done.
Grade: A
ALIENS IN AMERICA (The CW)
http://www.cwtv.com/shows/aliens-in-america
A show that has absolutely no right to be nearly as warm, funny and sharp as it is - but it's all that and more. Here it is - the best new comedy of this season. It's about a nerd and the Pakistani student who comes to stay with them - and yet - this single camera half hour has the best comic sensibility of all the new comedies on the air right now. If you haven't seen this yet, catch up!
Grade: A
ROCK OF LOVE FINALE
http://www.vh1.com/shows/dyn/rock_of_love/series_characters.jhtml
I loved this whole show - I LOVED Rodeo, Brandy C. and Brandy M. (both can be seen in online porn as dirty as anything you've ever seen) and I thought Shannon was very pretty, very insane, and VERY entertaining. I loved Heather's 80s porno hair and her Bride Of Frankenstein makeup (made even funnier by the fact that every time Heather was scene sans makeup, she was kind of beautiful. But in the end, I think Mr. Michaels made exactly the right choice. But what is Heather going to do with that tattoo?
GRADE: B +
The Next Great American Band (FOX)
Pretty good - at 2 hours, pretty long. Not enough there to make me watch this every week.
Grade: C-
KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS (E!)
Ridiculous - and not in the good way. Bruce Jenner should have his medals stripped away.
Grade: F
SNL - THE NEW SEASON
It truly sucks out loud. And with Seth Myers now co-hosting UPDATE - there is truly no more compelling reason to watch this sinking ship. Is it even TRYING to be funny?
Grade: F
I still miss THE SOPRANOS and thought they were ROBBED at the Emmys in the acting awards, especially for Gandolfini, Edie Falco and Michael Imperiolli. That the moron who plays Janice got nominated - well - Ryan Seacrest was hosting (after a decent monologue, his uselessness became really apparent.) James Spader should've been ashamed to take that Emmy home, especially since BOSTON LEGAL stopped being a real show about 3 seasons ago.
Did anyone hear that massive fight between Sal and Artie on the STERN RADIO SHOW - it was insane, real - and I wonder if Sal still has a job. For the record, Sal was so far out of line I was sort of surprised that he wasn't fired on the spot. Still, he makes for compelling radio, and I wonder if he'll be given some slack over this - but this was about as uncomfortable and riveting as live radio goes. There's a reason Howard is the King. Here is the synopsis from their official site:
www.howardstern.com
"DOWNTRODDEN” COMEDIANS STAND UP
Howard railed against Richard and Sal's claim (made on the Wrap-Up Show yesterday) that he gives Artie more slack with the guests. Howard and Artie explained that it was Artie's job to be a larger part of the show,
and he's paid accordingly. Sal came in to defend himself, but Howard immediately speculated that Sal’s complaint was just an extension of his jealousy over Howard's close relationship with Artie.
Artie told Sal that he and Richard were just “glorified radio contest winners,” and Howard wondered why Sal and Richard always felt so “downtrodden.” Richard remarked that he was just offended when people mocked the validity of his ideas and claimed they couldn't care less if he died. Artie noted that Sal crosses the line with guests, like when he insulted Jon Stewart's comedy and asked Ace Frehley for his phone number.
ARTIE, SAL, AND RICHARD GET AGGRESSIVE
Sal began yelling that he always defended Artie, even though Artie “rips off” audiences by performing the same act over and over. Sal also told Artie that he was "nothing" before the Stern show, that he was horrible on MAD TV and that BEER LEAGUE is the worst shit ever and that Artie walks around like he's God's gift to comedy. Artie told Sal that he should go f’ himself, watch his “gay” kids die ofR>TRONG>AIDS, and meet him downstairs later for an asskicking. Howard said Artie really didn't want Sal's kids to die of AIDS, and Artie admitted that Howard was right; he hoped Sal kids live to “at least 25” before the disease kills them.
Gary came in to say that Richard was being less than honest about his feelings, so Richard confessed that he thought Gary didn’t like him or want to hear any of his bits. Gary told Richard that “it's not that I don't want to hear anything, it's that I don't want to hear everything,” adding that Richard is “passive-aggressive” to the “nth-degree” when his bits don't get played. Howard then informed Richard that Gary's intuition was right 99% of the time.
THE NEXT DAY:
A MOMENT WITH FRED
Howard took a moment with Fred, who “endorsed” Artie in his fight with Sal and Richard because they'd “crossed the line” by throwing “everything but the kitchen sink” at Artie during their “attack” on him yesterday. Fred also said he thought Jerry Seinfeld was a “wacko,” as Jerry's “America's sweetheart” status doesn't agree with the fact that he once dated a 17 year-old and “stole” a newlywed woman. Robin agreed with Fred on both counts.
A MESSAGE FROM THE STERN SHOW OMBUDSMAN
Jason came in to say he mistakenly gave the impression yesterday that Richard has been pulling people aside to talk trash about Artie. Jason clarified that Richard had just mentioned (in the course of a “casual conversation”) he was upset with Artie for insulting his bits and “undermining” his work. Artie wondered why he was brought up in a “casual conversation,” but Jason couldn't remember, saying Richard just seemed angry with the fact that Artie says one thing to his face and the opposite on-air.
JD: SAL & RICHARD'S “REPRESENTATIVE”
Howard asked Sal and Richard if they wanted to “work out the parameters” of their new relationship with Artie, so JD came in as their “representative” and said they were doing fine. JD explained that the guys were hard at work on some new projects, and everyone was surprised they were turning down airtime. Howard noted that Richard told people he was bummed that yesterday's fight happened on Halloween. JD then read a statement from Sal and Richard in which they claimed they were upset with the listener emails Howard had read in support of Artie, as he'd skipped over all the ones that defended them. Howard told JD that he was the only real winner in this debacle, but JD didn't seem to buy it.
LATER:
ROBIN BEGINS (AND ENDS) HER CAREER AS A MODERATOR
Sal & Richard came in to say that Robin had convinced them to return to the studio. Sal requested that Robin be their “moderator,” so Howard begrudgingly obliged. Sal then said he and Artie were very passionate about their work, so when someone insults that work, they tend to lash out. Sal apologized for insulting Artie's resume, and Richard said that while Artie's comments sometimes hurt, they'll just deal with it from now on.
Howard asked how Sal making fun of Gary's work was different than Artie making fun of Sal's work, but Sal claimed it was “different.” Artie said Richard and Sal were asking him to edit himself, so Richard replied that he didn't want Artie to censor himself, just be aware that his statements hurt. Sal then apologized to Artie but still maintained that “Beer League” was “OK” – and not as good as his own film, “Robin's Meats & Vegetables.”
BUT HOW DO YOU REALLY FEEL?
Artie said he didn't like Sal and Richard, calling them “serpent pussy homos,” and never wanted to see them again, adding that when Howard retires, Sal will be an “asswipe without a hole.” Artie then became so angry, he started throwing things in Sal’s direction (but missing), scaring everyone in the studio into near-silence. Howard remarked that he missed Artie's outburst because he was “drawing pictures” and told Artie that throwing things wasn't cool. Artie indignantly told Howard he didn't care what he thought, saying, “Fire me.” Artie repeated his threats to “drop” Sal, noting that he couldn't be around “phony asswipes like that.” Fred began picking up the items that Artie threw, and Sal said he was fine and understood Artie's anger. Howard explained that Sal might be retarded, but he doesn't hate Artie. Artie again said he didn't care and refused to cooperate with Howard's attempts at diplomacy.
HOWARD PUTS OUT THE FIRE
Howard eventually succeeded in calming everyone down, and Artie apologized for his actions and asked if he could light a cigarette. Howard allowed Artie to light
up, and apologized for allowing the situation to escalate. Artie laughed that he just remembered Cara, his “Beer League” co-star, was in the green room the whole time. Howard then thanked everyone and told Artie to get some pussy this weekend. (This entire synopsis reprinted from the official HOWARD STERN WEBSITE www.howardstern.com
In the next Digital Couch:
DAMAGES (FX)
DEXTER: SEASON 2 (SHOWTIME)
WEEDS: SEASON 3 (SHOWTIME)
SPRINGSTEEN: MAGIC and LA SPORTS ARENA SHOW
and much more!
http://television.aol.com/show/californication/1342172/main?flv=1&ncid=yInozwVMCu0000000742&icid=rbox_tv_shows.M
Okay, once you get over the concept that on this show - every single female in the world, straight and bi, wants to fuck David Duchovny, this becomes an enjoyable show that tries very hard to expose the pain and loathing that tags along with sex, drugs and debauchery. They don't quite hit the mark - but get close enough and some of the stories are truly memorable. Duchovny plays Hank Moody, a novelist whose book got turned into a high grossing shitty movie, so he's angry at the world. (Most can only wish for these problems.) Moody still holds a torch for his ex wife who he shares a child with, and some of the sex scenes go pretty far on the outrageous meter. The entire show though, is pretty much stolen from Duchovny by Evan Handler, who plays Hank's agent. Though his storyline seems directly lifted out of SECRETARY, the very good James Spader film, there is something very real about Handler (you might remember him as Charlotte's lawyer boyfriend on SEX AND THE CITY. The apex of the show probably hits when the two ex-wives walk in during a 3 way between Hank, Handler and a very foxy lady who covers Handler's face with a special talent. While all the stuff with Mia (sorry, you have to know the show) and the way that Handler gets his new associate and all the stuff with them and the stolen (supposedly genius book) written by Hank...it's too complicated - needless to say, for a show about Hollywood, it doesn't seem to really have any idea of the way things actually work. And while the conclusion was very satisfying - the last 2 minutes undid much good will towards the show I only hope if this makes it to season 2, that this last minute piss poor plot twist (a very bad GRADUATE homage) was just fantasy. Still - recommended.
Grade: B -
DIRTY SEXY MONEY (ABC)
http://television.aol.com/show/dirty-sexy-money/1342101/main?flv=1&ncid=oyjqUzrKfk0000000465&icid=rbox_tv_shows.M
I haven't seen all of these, (my dvr got wiped a few weeks ago and I lost HOURS of programming) I've really liked what I've seen.
Grade: B
I just heard from THE SURF REPORT that HBO is airing a series finale' of EXTRAS. This is cause of celebration. Now if only they could give a proper ending to DEADWOOD (though I contend the final episode would probably serve as a better finale' than one they would construct), get THE SOPRANOS to do a few more seasons (sorry, there's nothing else like it) and do another season of Lisa Kudrow's ill fated THE COMEBACK....now that would be something.
Speaking of finale's, how outrageous is it that Seinfeld wanted to shoot another final episode of SEINFELD to coincide with the new box set? Jerry - PLEASE do the episode anyway and erase memories of your own season final - the worst in the entire 9 year run. Speaking of which, I've been watching season 4 again on DVD and THE CHEEVER LETTERS might be one of the funniest eps they've ever done. But really, for the sake of humanity, Jerry - give us a proper ending to the greatest comedy of all time! (Along with the Honeymooners and The Office BBC)
THE FLY (DVD - DAVID CRONENBERG REMAKE)
http://www.amazon.com/Fly-Two-Disc-Collectors-Jeff-Goldblum/dp/B0009X768W/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194225656&sr=8-1
Fox recently released this 80s classic in a great 2-disc set. While I have not yet gone through the oodles and oodles of extras, the centerpiece remains the story of a man, Jeff Goldblum, a shy scientist who strikes up a very unlikely romance with the adorable reporter Geena Davis. Goldblum has created a machine that can transport entities through time, and I had forgotten how truly spectacular the effects were, the acting of Goldblum (I think he was nominated), and how incredibly sad a story this was. And the writing and direction is truly topnotch, as it mines many of Cronenberg's favorite obsessions. An creepy, dreadful masterpiece and a lesson in efficient storytelling.
Grade: A +
TAXI DRIVER (DVD)
http://www.amazon.com/Taxi-Driver-Two-Disc-Collectors-Robert/dp/B000R8YC18/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194226132&sr=1-1
They just did a 2 disc reissue of this, but I just watched the 2 disc reissue I bought a few years ago. What a great, intense and fascinating movie. DeNiro is perfect, as is Jodie Foster and every other element of the film. There is not one false note here, and DeNiro's speed taking, alcohol swigging street avenger is just as powerful now as it was 30 years ago. The bomb. And Scorsesee's first great movie (MEAN STREETS was good - this is great.)
Grade: A +
EAGLES "Long Road Out Of Eden" (CD - first Eagles CD in 23 years!)
http://www.amazon.com/Eagles-Long-Road-Eden-Release/dp/B000XQX6H0/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=miscellaneous&qid=1194226796&sr=1-1
I can't believe as I write this blog, my first in a few months, I'm listening to the first Eagle's CD - I think - in 23 years (The Long Run was I believe released in 79 or something like that.) There are 20 new songs here that barely qualify as a double disc (if they'd ridden themselves of 3 songs, they'd be a single disc.) Actually - "How Long" which sort of sounds like "Take It Easy," is an unrecorded song from the 70s era that sounds exactly like it just came off THE BEST OF THE EAGLES. Frey and Henley's vocals have never sound crisper and the band, including the awesome Joe Walsh, is as tight as ever. They've apparently been working on this for 5 years, and 1 song that appears here "No More Cloudy Days" appeared on 2005's THE FIRST FAREWELL DVD. Another song to be included from that DVD was a great song by Joe Walsh called "One Day At A Time" but somehow didn't make it to this collection. "Cloudy Days" is GREAT by the way with a killer Glen Frey vocal. My friend, Dave D., recently pointed out to me how far these guys had gotten away from greatness - at one point Frey had a minor hit with SMUGGLER'S BLUES and even acted on MIAMI VICE as the smuggler with the blues. Jesus. I also think it's interesting that they are clearly labelled now as "country rock" - somehow I never saw them that way, but between that self promotion of country and the fact that the CD will only be available at Walmart exclusively for the next year (Shame on you, Don Henley - after all your corporate screaming) - this all seems to be part of a financial arrangement to market specifically to the Midwest. This is a shame because the CD is really good and feels like it came right after THE LONG RUN with no seams showing. Maybe a few too many shitty ballads, but mostly this CD rocks hard and makes you remember why you loved The Eagles in the first place. Standouts: "Waiting In The Weeds, No More Cloudy Days, You Are Not Alone, Long Road Out Of Eden (a new 10 minute Eagles masterpiece - well, maybe I need to hear it more to proclaim masterpiece, but it sounds really good, definitely in the vein of "the last resort" and other classics,) I Dreamed There Was No War, Somebody, Last Good Time In Town (a new Joe Walsh/Eagles classic in the vein of Life's Been Good,) Center Of The Universe and It's Your World Now. The Eagles are definitely back, and I think that's a good thing. If they can make their next CD in less time, that'll be a great thing - but still - this is a gift to the true believers.
Grade: B +
MICK JAGGER "BEST OF MICK SOLO" (CD/DVD)
http://www.amazon.com/Very-Best-Mick-Jagger-Dvd/dp/B000V9M0E4/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1194227730&sr=8-2
Good collection, but how's they miss PARADISE and BRAND NEW SET OF RULES? The best 2 solo Mick offerings EVER! And where is STATE OF SHOCK with Michael Jackson? (Just kidding.)
Grade: B
ELTON JOHN AT 60: MADISON SQUARE GARDEN
http://www.amazon.com/Elton-60-Madison-Square-Garden/dp/B000UZD4AS/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194228203&sr=8-2
One of the best Elton packages ever offered, EVER! This has him at his 60th birthday at Madison Square Garden belting out around 40 songs in perfect pitch, and there's about 24 more archival performances of his. This pretty much covers everything. Even though I will always love the ONE NIGHT ONLY dvd, this will be the one I watch for a while. There are like - 64 songs on here - and all are in stellar versions - the 5.1 mix is superb - this is one of the best Elton dvds ever produced, and Elton sings like a champ. At 60 years old, this fucker is still doing it.
Grade: A +
JOHN FOGERTY "Revival"
Great - kind of sounds like a Clearwater CD. His best collection since CENTERFIELD.
Grade: B
JACKASS 2 (DVD)
http://www.amazon.com/Jackass-Number-Unrated-Willie-Garson/dp/B000JLTRJK/ref=pd_bbs_1/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1194228661&sr=1-1
I recently re-watched this with some friends and forgot just how profanely funny this is. And I also could not believe that none of these guys have ended up dead yet. But Knoxville and Co. are some inventive, funny mother fuckers. Some of the bits here are off the charts, but for my money, the switcheroo involving Bam's dad and an impostor might be the funniest thing I've seen in ages. But I think the main attraction here is the commoradirty between the guys - their good naturedness towards each other in the face of personal atrocities perpetrated on each other is truly admirable. And "Grandpa's Balls" has to be seen to be believed.
Grade: A
I LOVE NEW YORK 2 (VH1)
http://www.vh1.com/shows/series/i_love_new_york_2/splash.jhtml
Twice as outrageous as last year and about twice as staged. Definitely off the MUST WATCH list, due to the obvious prodding and scripting by producers. Even New York's mom, complete with a whole new makeover which makes her almost indistinguishable from her daughter, seems to be in on the storylining this year. Why can't reality shows just let shit HAPPEN?
Grade: C -
FLAVA FLAV ROAST (COM CENTRAL)
http://www.amazon.com/Comedy-Central-Roast-Flavor-Flav/dp/B000V2SQ80/ref=pd_bbs_sr_5/103-7085827-8050222?ie=UTF8&s=digital-video&qid=1194228970&sr=8-5
Jimmy Kimmel killed, as did Ross Schwartz, and this was one of the funniest roasts Comedy Central has ever done.
Grade: A
ALIENS IN AMERICA (The CW)
http://www.cwtv.com/shows/aliens-in-america
A show that has absolutely no right to be nearly as warm, funny and sharp as it is - but it's all that and more. Here it is - the best new comedy of this season. It's about a nerd and the Pakistani student who comes to stay with them - and yet - this single camera half hour has the best comic sensibility of all the new comedies on the air right now. If you haven't seen this yet, catch up!
Grade: A
ROCK OF LOVE FINALE
http://www.vh1.com/shows/dyn/rock_of_love/series_characters.jhtml
I loved this whole show - I LOVED Rodeo, Brandy C. and Brandy M. (both can be seen in online porn as dirty as anything you've ever seen) and I thought Shannon was very pretty, very insane, and VERY entertaining. I loved Heather's 80s porno hair and her Bride Of Frankenstein makeup (made even funnier by the fact that every time Heather was scene sans makeup, she was kind of beautiful. But in the end, I think Mr. Michaels made exactly the right choice. But what is Heather going to do with that tattoo?
GRADE: B +
The Next Great American Band (FOX)
Pretty good - at 2 hours, pretty long. Not enough there to make me watch this every week.
Grade: C-
KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS (E!)
Ridiculous - and not in the good way. Bruce Jenner should have his medals stripped away.
Grade: F
SNL - THE NEW SEASON
It truly sucks out loud. And with Seth Myers now co-hosting UPDATE - there is truly no more compelling reason to watch this sinking ship. Is it even TRYING to be funny?
Grade: F
I still miss THE SOPRANOS and thought they were ROBBED at the Emmys in the acting awards, especially for Gandolfini, Edie Falco and Michael Imperiolli. That the moron who plays Janice got nominated - well - Ryan Seacrest was hosting (after a decent monologue, his uselessness became really apparent.) James Spader should've been ashamed to take that Emmy home, especially since BOSTON LEGAL stopped being a real show about 3 seasons ago.
Did anyone hear that massive fight between Sal and Artie on the STERN RADIO SHOW - it was insane, real - and I wonder if Sal still has a job. For the record, Sal was so far out of line I was sort of surprised that he wasn't fired on the spot. Still, he makes for compelling radio, and I wonder if he'll be given some slack over this - but this was about as uncomfortable and riveting as live radio goes. There's a reason Howard is the King. Here is the synopsis from their official site:
www.howardstern.com
"DOWNTRODDEN” COMEDIANS STAND UP
Howard railed against Richard and Sal's claim (made on the Wrap-Up Show yesterday) that he gives Artie more slack with the guests. Howard and Artie explained that it was Artie's job to be a larger part of the show,
and he's paid accordingly. Sal came in to defend himself, but Howard immediately speculated that Sal’s complaint was just an extension of his jealousy over Howard's close relationship with Artie.
Artie told Sal that he and Richard were just “glorified radio contest winners,” and Howard wondered why Sal and Richard always felt so “downtrodden.” Richard remarked that he was just offended when people mocked the validity of his ideas and claimed they couldn't care less if he died. Artie noted that Sal crosses the line with guests, like when he insulted Jon Stewart's comedy and asked Ace Frehley for his phone number.
ARTIE, SAL, AND RICHARD GET AGGRESSIVE
Sal began yelling that he always defended Artie, even though Artie “rips off” audiences by performing the same act over and over. Sal also told Artie that he was "nothing" before the Stern show, that he was horrible on MAD TV and that BEER LEAGUE is the worst shit ever and that Artie walks around like he's God's gift to comedy. Artie told Sal that he should go f’ himself, watch his “gay” kids die of
Gary came in to say that Richard was being less than honest about his feelings, so Richard confessed that he thought Gary didn’t like him or want to hear any of his bits. Gary told Richard that “it's not that I don't want to hear anything, it's that I don't want to hear everything,” adding that Richard is “passive-aggressive” to the “nth-degree” when his bits don't get played. Howard then informed Richard that Gary's intuition was right 99% of the time.
THE NEXT DAY:
A MOMENT WITH FRED
Howard took a moment with Fred, who “endorsed” Artie in his fight with Sal and Richard because they'd “crossed the line” by throwing “everything but the kitchen sink” at Artie during their “attack” on him yesterday. Fred also said he thought Jerry Seinfeld was a “wacko,” as Jerry's “America's sweetheart” status doesn't agree with the fact that he once dated a 17 year-old and “stole” a newlywed woman. Robin agreed with Fred on both counts.
A MESSAGE FROM THE STERN SHOW OMBUDSMAN
Jason came in to say he mistakenly gave the impression yesterday that Richard has been pulling people aside to talk trash about Artie. Jason clarified that Richard had just mentioned (in the course of a “casual conversation”) he was upset with Artie for insulting his bits and “undermining” his work. Artie wondered why he was brought up in a “casual conversation,” but Jason couldn't remember, saying Richard just seemed angry with the fact that Artie says one thing to his face and the opposite on-air.
JD: SAL & RICHARD'S “REPRESENTATIVE”
Howard asked Sal and Richard if they wanted to “work out the parameters” of their new relationship with Artie, so JD came in as their “representative” and said they were doing fine. JD explained that the guys were hard at work on some new projects, and everyone was surprised they were turning down airtime. Howard noted that Richard told people he was bummed that yesterday's fight happened on Halloween. JD then read a statement from Sal and Richard in which they claimed they were upset with the listener emails Howard had read in support of Artie, as he'd skipped over all the ones that defended them. Howard told JD that he was the only real winner in this debacle, but JD didn't seem to buy it.
LATER:
ROBIN BEGINS (AND ENDS) HER CAREER AS A MODERATOR
Sal & Richard came in to say that Robin had convinced them to return to the studio. Sal requested that Robin be their “moderator,” so Howard begrudgingly obliged. Sal then said he and Artie were very passionate about their work, so when someone insults that work, they tend to lash out. Sal apologized for insulting Artie's resume, and Richard said that while Artie's comments sometimes hurt, they'll just deal with it from now on.
Howard asked how Sal making fun of Gary's work was different than Artie making fun of Sal's work, but Sal claimed it was “different.” Artie said Richard and Sal were asking him to edit himself, so Richard replied that he didn't want Artie to censor himself, just be aware that his statements hurt. Sal then apologized to Artie but still maintained that “Beer League” was “OK” – and not as good as his own film, “Robin's Meats & Vegetables.”
BUT HOW DO YOU REALLY FEEL?
Artie said he didn't like Sal and Richard, calling them “serpent pussy homos,” and never wanted to see them again, adding that when Howard retires, Sal will be an “asswipe without a hole.” Artie then became so angry, he started throwing things in Sal’s direction (but missing), scaring everyone in the studio into near-silence. Howard remarked that he missed Artie's outburst because he was “drawing pictures” and told Artie that throwing things wasn't cool. Artie indignantly told Howard he didn't care what he thought, saying, “Fire me.” Artie repeated his threats to “drop” Sal, noting that he couldn't be around “phony asswipes like that.” Fred began picking up the items that Artie threw, and Sal said he was fine and understood Artie's anger. Howard explained that Sal might be retarded, but he doesn't hate Artie. Artie again said he didn't care and refused to cooperate with Howard's attempts at diplomacy.
HOWARD PUTS OUT THE FIRE
Howard eventually succeeded in calming everyone down, and Artie apologized for his actions and asked if he could light a cigarette. Howard allowed Artie to light
up, and apologized for allowing the situation to escalate. Artie laughed that he just remembered Cara, his “Beer League” co-star, was in the green room the whole time. Howard then thanked everyone and told Artie to get some pussy this weekend. (This entire synopsis reprinted from the official HOWARD STERN WEBSITE www.howardstern.com
In the next Digital Couch:
DAMAGES (FX)
DEXTER: SEASON 2 (SHOWTIME)
WEEDS: SEASON 3 (SHOWTIME)
SPRINGSTEEN: MAGIC and LA SPORTS ARENA SHOW
and much more!
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