But the blog will change somewhat in that I’m now doing a sort of a mini-version of what I used to do. You’ll see – hope u like the subtle changes and if you don’t – complain to the man.
HOUSE “Joy” (FOX) (SPOILER)
Episode concerned Cuddy adopting a child while the team treated a sleepwalking patient. A solid episode, but the juice was in the last five minutes when House and Cuddy kissed.
ROB ZOMBIE’S “HALLOWEEN” (2 DISC DVD RELEASE)
This is kind of a strange movie. Rob Zombie, who made the brilliant, incomparable “Devil’s Rejects” remakes the 1979 classic with an assured touch and a reverence towards the original material. I’ll tell you what he gets right: the origin of the Michael Myers story. Rob’s wife, Sherry Moon plays mom to William Forthye’s raging, wheelchair bound dad (Forsthye had a serious injury which caused Zombie to rewrite his character as having just been in a major accident.) Zombie digs very deep into what the motivations were for Michael to go off the deep end, and sticks with him through the mental hospital. This is all really good, scary/real stuff – but where Zombie’s film nearly falls apart is the segment of Michael coming back to Haddonfield. (Remember the ads “The night HE came home!”
Since Jamie Lee Curtis was revealed to be Michael’s sister in HALLOWEEN II, it’s become lore that she’s the sister. Nobody seems to remember that they were not revealed as siblings in part 1 – for people who are still reading, the footage was shot for the original. However, John Carpenter ultimately felt that the movie was creepier if we had no idea why he was coming after Jamie Lee Curtis and that very footage was used both in longer TV prints (extended versions) of the original HALLOWEEN and also in the sequel, HALLOWEEN II (the only legit sequel till H20 20 years later.) HALLOWEEN II was not directed by Carpenter but he did write it and there was plenty of his unused footage in the film.
After II came HALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH which was supposed to be the beginning of a yearly Halloween film exploring a different storyline. This never came to pass as SEASON OF THE WITCH just seemed to confuse people. Starting out a new series with PART III in your title is also probably not the best way to launch a new anthology.
After SEASON, Carpenter left the HALLOWEEN series, and it was taken over by one of the producers, MUSTAFA AKKAD who made 4 more MIKE MYERS films before the Weinsteins (no relation) brought back Jamie Lee Curtis into the fold with H20 – set 20 years after the 2nd film. Then they did another one that involved Michael running around on a reality show killing people while Busta Rhymes made quips. Seriously.
Anyway – on this film, where Zombie falters is not bringing any real originality nor sense of dread to the final act. Instead, he goes through it in a very workman like approach as if he almost just wants to get it done and get out of there. With the exception of a slightly re-imagined final five minutes (which is pretty cool) he seemed to have lost interest in the last act of the film.
Ironically, this was not really the case. Listening to the excellent director’s commentary (Zombie is an extremely thoughtful and revealing filmmaker) the director reveals that he had to shoot the last part first and that they were plagued by a menagerie of production problems that seriously fucked up the first two weeks of shooting, which was mostly the entire last act. So he had much more time and care with the opening hour of the film. Is this worth it to see? Definitely. A top-rate horror director taking on a classic with new ideas and reverence, sure. Is it better than the original – nope. Does it add anything to the legend? In a way – the first hour is truly horrific and since there is no chance of another decent Halloween sequel, this is probably your best bet if you want to extend the experience. And this is way better than every sequel ever made to the original.
Grade: B +
THE HALLOWEEN MOVIES:
Halloween (Original) – A +
Halloween II – C + (expanded the story but mostly set in a dreary hospital with no dynamic or pacing.)
Halloween III: Season Of The Witch: D (fairly dumb story about evil toys taking over the world.)
ALL THE SEQUELS IN BETWEEN: F – 4,5 and 6 were all pretty bottom of the barrel entrys.
H20: 20 YEARS LATER – pretended that the series ended with 2 and picked up right after that. Boasting a script by the hot guy of the moment (I actually forgot who wrote it but I think it was the guy who wrote…no, that was story by – I don’t remember – I just know Steve Miner, who directed the first and second FRIDAY THE 13th directed with a sledgehammer and Jamie Lee Curtis was no longer playing Lori Strode but just a version of a STONG Jamie Lee (She’s not gonna take it, anymore!) Anyway – it mostly sucked, but was fun for the pop culture moment.
Grade: C +
HALLOWEEN: RESSURECTION – Oh, boy. So, as it turns out, Jamie Lee did not off Michael in the previous film. They restage it to make it look like she killed an ambulance driver (not so – in H20 it was clear she killed Michael.) Anyway – the first 10 minutes are of interest in that Jamie Lee once again reprises Lori Strode and she and Michael have the ending that they probably should have had in the previous film. But – what ultimately happens is that Busta Rhymes and his girlfriend, played by Tyra Banks, the most self important woman in history, do a reality show where 10 kids have to spend the night in the Myers home. Unwatchable. Michael is running around killing reality show contestants, Trya Banks is acting like Tyra Banks, Busta Rymes is busting out Kung-Fu on Michael (you read right) and people are watching it over the internet. God help us all.
Grade: F
I should also say – I watched FRIDAY THE 13th PART 4: The Final Chapter on Halloween night with some friends. (We watch a new installment every year.) Part 4 was probably the best of all the sequels, boasting an almost famous cast (Corey Feldman and Crispin Glover!) and even the star of LAST AMERICAN VIRGIN, Larry Monosoon! However, the film was not quite as good as I’d remembered it when I watched it first-run at the Canarsie Theater in Brooklyn. The effects, on the other hand – handled by the masterful Tom Savini, were even better than I had remembered. At the time, I recall Tom Savini saying he would do this film (he had done the effects in the very first Jason film) but only because they were killing Jason off in this final chapter. If only he knew.
By the way, FRIDAY is getting a HALLOWEEN style re-boot as well.
I really liked “W.”
I also really liked “IRON MAN”
LIFE & TIMES OF TIM (HBO)
Continues to find new and twisted ways to humiliate it’s game animated star.
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Probably the best prime-time reality show on the air at the moment.
TRUE BLOOD (HBO) has remained consistently surprising and spooky.
THE SHIELD (FX)
Is better than ever. The cat and mouse between Vic, Shane and Ronnie is awesome, although I thought Vic turning in his badge was handled more as an afterthought than a huge component of what made the series tick in the first place. Still, this is a first rate show shaking off the first few miserable eps of the season and settling down for a final 4 episode run of one of the most memorable cop shows ever. Even if it is still hanging on to its corruption theme by a thread.
Grade: A
I have about 9 episodes of SONS OF ANARCHY on my DVR. Should I banish them or watch?
I got rid of all the GENERATION KILLs on my DVR after not really following the opener – did I make a big mistake – I can get them next time around.
I sort of like the new ads for NIP/TUCK and kind of miss that show, even though they’ve been off the rail now for YEARS.
30 ROCK (NBC)
Had a funny opener, though I hated the fact that Alec Baldwin had to fight to get his job back. The show works best with everybody in place and I’m also not so sure how I feel about the Tina Fey adopting a baby thing – but – even at it’s most mediocre this show is always funny.
Grade: B +
THE OFFICE (NBC)
Clocked in with an episode that saw the end of the relationship between Michael and Amy Ryan. That stuff was good – the stuff with Dwight and the Cornell thing – not so much.
Ashley Olsen on LETTERMAN seemed kind of brain dead the other night.
Sarah Silverman was on KIMMEL LIVE the other night. She and Jimmy were hilarious trying to pretend that this was a straight interview – they then pulled a tape of a 15 year old Sarah belting out a number for a local cable audition show – the clip of the young Sarah was nothing short of astonishing.
ABOUT A SON (Sundance)
Great, great docu using actual recordings of Kurt Cobain as he sort of narrates his life and rise in music stardom accompanied by vintage pictures of Seattle, Kurt and co. I would say for Nirvana fans only, but Kurt’s insights are for anybody who has a mind. And it only gets better as it goes on - highly recommended.
Grade: B +
CELEBRITY CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING (CMT)
Hulk Hogan and a few other favorites from WWF wrestling (though this show seems to have no affiliation with the WWF) takes an impressive roster of celebs – Danny Bonaduce, seemingly possessed, Erin Murphy, who played Tabitha on BEWITCHED and now just seems like a bitter, nasty woman, former NBA oddity Dennis Rodman, who is still painfully shy (he really is – getting him to talk is like pulling teeth) Todd Bridges, Frank Stallone (who is the best looking 58 year old man I’ve ever seen – not that…never mind), teen singing sensation Tiffany; looking a complete mess, the gorgeous but unusually bubble headed Nikki Ziering, Dustin Diamond, way more normal than usual, and Butterbean. Who is as disgusting as he is fat. (Watch the show – you’ll see why.) Anyway – this is yet another production from mr. Jason Hervey – brother Wayne in THE WONDER YEARS. His first was Scott Baio is 40 and Single. Ok, this show is a LOT better than that show. In fact – I love this show – despite the fact that I think it could be produced a whole lot better. The show is simple enough – 12 celebs compete for the CMT belt (oh, brother) and every week a different celeb gets ousted. Bonaduce already reduced Erin to tears by saying “You should bet me fifty grand that I outlast you – but you won’t bet because you don’t have one dime in the bank and everyone hear knows it.” Danny than goes on to tell the camera that he’s been making this girl cry for 35 years. But – she did have it coming.
Anyway – it’s a really fun show – but don’t forget – wrestling in a ring – and I actually know from experience – fake or not fake – is HARD. The pain is REAL and to be honest – it’s just a chore getting through those ropes. It may not look it, but these celebs are not only killing themselves but learning a really hard sport/art. And it is an art. So far, I think Bonaduce, Willis and Screech have the best chance – but what do I know. I thought Stallone would’ve stuck around a little longer. But I watched 3 in a row of these and was never once bored.
Grade: B +
BABY MAMA (DVD) & MAID OF HONOR (DVD)
I got my mom both of these while she was sick – her review:
“Neither were Acadamy Award winners but they were very entertaining!”
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE w/ Jon Hamm and Coldplay (NBC)
This might’ve been the funniest installment in years. Maybe it was the precense of Jon Hamm, who not only did a funny MAD MEN sketch, but scored even further and deeper with the brilliant “Don Draper’s Guide To Picking Up Women.” Coldplay was superb, doing three songs instead of the usual 2, and the song to Amy Poehler leaving was sweet and warranted. We also got to see the great “Solid as Barack” sketch which I think was one of their best. SNL funny? This can’t possibly last.
Grade: B +
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE w/Ben Affleck, John McCain and musical guest (NBC)
With John McCain and Tina Fey in an absolutely terrific sketch as QVC salesman. I even though McCain was really funny with the otherwise useless Seth Myers. The rest of the show – not so much. Ben Affleck – not so much. The musical guest – I can’t remember who it was.
I really have been liking LIFE ON MARS (ABC.) It’s great to have Harvey Keitel and Michael Imporiolli (and his great, great mustache) back on TV. I haven’t seen the original so I’m not sure how it compares, but I love the soundtrack and the 70s stuff and appreciate that they went into 1973 instead of the late 70s that seems to permeate most period shows.
The Lakers have won 3 games in a row – could this be their season?
MAD MEN (AMC)
The last batch of these were amazing, literate and truly ambitiously written, directed and acted television. I will miss the show during its hiatus and can’t wait for season 3. Kudos to the entire cast, especially the writers, the set designers, the amazing actors, especially Jon Hamm and January Jones. There are so many other things to marvel at in this show, I’ll just say – if you have not seen this from episode 1, do so at once.
Grade: A + (Highest recommendation)
SNL: PRESIDENTIAL BASH (NBC)
I liked this rehash of the old and new – but really – it’s time to make this a new show all together – maybe show SOME of the great recent sketches but this was mostly a quickly thrown together “best of” which worked – to some degree.
Grade: B
If you do nothing else today get out and VOTE!
2008/11/04
2008/10/10
CLOSED FOR THE SEASON
For reasons I can’t get into – I’m taking some time off again. I hope you’ve enjoyed the reviews – at some point I’ll come out of retirement – but probably not for a little while. If you have any questions about anything – feel free to email me – otherwise – will see you on the other side. I tried to get a lot of shows in since this’ll be the one for the road.
Peace and thanks for all the fish.
DIGITAL COUCH out.
10.10.08
THE DEBATES (ABC/CBS/FOX/NBC/CNBC/CSPAN)
I have no interest in sharing my politics here, as I’m sure you have no interest in reading about them. But the actor who plays Obama is fantastic – doing this sort of – straight-man slow-burn while the actor playing McCain is wonderful. He makes McCain sad and pathetic – but very aggressive about his opinions and a bit like a dog wanting his belly scratched. Okay – I was trying something out here that didn’t really work – but basically – it doesn’t matter whose side you’re on – the debates are fucking hilarious. Biden seemed like a patient grade school teacher with a rambunctious young student. Palin seems like a lot of fun. Imagine getting her drunk? And McCain seems like this defeated sad/funny clown while Obama seems bright but about as humorless as they come. And his anger is so subtle. As far as who gets my vote – what do you care? But as for sole entertainment value:
Grade: A +
THE SARAH SILVERMAN SHOW (COMEDY CENTRAL)
Sarah returns with a bong! The first episode charted Sarah’s entry into the world of pot with hilarious results. The thing about leaving herself messages when she’s high – so brilliant – so true – not that I would know. I am SO GLAD this show is back - one my very favorites and Sarah and her talented cast will be a welcome addition this season. And based on the premeire - it's gonna be a great one.
Grade: A +
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (NBC)
Anne Hathaway and The Killers. Is it just me or is this ever-so-slowly getting slightly funnier. I actually laughed a few times and I thought Hathaway was a pretty good guest host. I love that Tina Fey is coming every week thus far to do Palin, and her bit about asking Biden if she can call him Joe, “because I practiced some zingers where I call you Joe” was hilarious. And some of the sketches were legitimately funny – The Killers were GREAT. I’ll tell you who is NOT funny– the new heavy set guy with the curly hair – this week we discovered that he can dance. While I’m not immune to the hilarity of a fat man dancing, I don’t know – they seem to really be pushing him and that woman who started last season whose name I still do not know but seems to fit in okay (I guess also on the heavyset side compared to the other woman.) She’s okay if not memorable – so far, he’s the killer of comedy. Literally.
Grade: B -
LIFE AND TIMES OF TIM (HBO)
Laugh out loud funny, this is one of the best things I’ve ever seen. No review – just watch it. It’s on the dirty side, so live a little.
Grade: A +
UPDATE:
I just watched the 2nd episode. Hilarious. Truly must-see. It’s insane, profane, and perfect.
Grade: A +
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
Continues to be a fairly uninspired effort. This had a couple of funny seasons in it, and I have no doubt that there will be future funny eps – but last season and this new one are anything but.
Grade: C -
GONE COUNTRY (CMT)
After a few mellow episodes, this built to the big show, where everyone had to sing their newly written song in front of a live audience and John Rich picks the winner. It was shocking how close Lorenzo Lamas came to pulling it off, Sean Young at the very least appeared normal and to have a good time, even if she sounded like shit. The guy who used to be in N’synch I thought personally had one of the best songs – but the two guys that had it down to the wire were none other than Jermaine Jackson – who is the sweatiest mother fucker I’ve ever seen, and who – frankly – I didn’t really get his song. But Sebastian Bach had a brilliant song about drinking called BATTLE WITH THE BOTTLE that was actually really good and he ended up winning the competition. This was a good series with a great ending. Looking forward to the next season of this.
Grade: B +
PRISON BREAK (FOX)
Has re-invented itself yet again – now it’s just the best action show – maybe ever. This last episode, with Michael going back to break out Mahone – was one of the best moments of the season. This is a unique show in that it really seemed to have stopped giving a shit about getting new fans and truly plays to the core audience. If you’re not one of them – go out and rent every season – this is THAT good.
Grade: A +
UPDATE: PRISON BREAK – the next episode
I just caught last night. The one in Vegas. Very outrageous, very slick, and there is nothing better than watching Theodore Bagwell (T-Bag) get fucked over. The thing with Sucre and the old man and his wife was priceless.
Grade: A +
THE SHIELD (FX)
What can I say? I’m the biggest fan of this show, but these final episodes are just sort of lacking in almost every way. The writing seems off, the acting is ok, the direction is weird – the storyline – while somewhat rewarding I guess to long time fans of the show, is fairly ridiculous and convoluted. I never really loved the money train season and now this just seems like a big re-do. I don’t believe this phony war Vic started – I REALLY don’t believe the bad acting and improbable situations of Vic’s daughter, Cassidy (played by Vic’s real-life daughter – poor thing. It’s as if someone said “just seem angry and sullen every second and you’ll win an Emmy!” Not only that – but the Billings stuff is worthless, the thing with the young serial killer in training is pretty ridiculous – worst of all, this Fed, played by a shitty actress named Lauren Holden (I’ve actually seen her in a movie from 10 years ago – she was bad then, worse now) is reciting some of the all time worst “tough banter” dialog – this thing is a mess. I think there are 5 eps left. This thing better really have some tricks up its sleeve to regain its good name and go out in style. But I’m not encouraged. It’s still The Shield – but it’s just not working like it used to – in their final season. Here’s hoping things pick up in the last batch of eps, which, if I’m looking at the show historically – they will. I just hope it won’t be too late.
Grade: B –
UPDATE: THE SHIELD (the latest ep)
FINALLY - things are back on track! They FINALLY put an end to the ridiculous Mexican-Armenian war thing – and they brought back some urgency to the storyline with our newest favorite subject of the last few seasons – the Vic/Shane/Lem situation. Last night’s episode was tense and gripping and surprising – I’m now looking forward to the last 5 or 6 original episodes left. They still need to get completely back on track – but they are more than half way there with this terrific episode.
Grade: A -
THE RACHEL ZOE PROJECT (BRAVO)
I have no idea why I like this show so much – I don’t know much about Zoe, except that she’s a polarizing big time designer in NYC and that she’s married and has this very successful design biz. In the few eps I watched, she did outfits for Kate Hudson, Debra Messing and a few others – but the show is more about her day to life, her intereactions with her staff – she has a staff of two. The droll, put-upon Taylor - always seemingly out of patience. And the very gay, very excitable Brad, who has impeccable taste and an impeccable way of getting himself into trouble with Rachel. But, honestly – I don’t find Rachel – who the media really loves to eviscerate – all that bad. She’s completely humorless, but she seems nice enough – she loves what she does and evidently she’s really good at it. And the show is particularly well-produced and frankly, I think gives a lot more info on the fashion world than a lot of other fashion shows. And Rachel is just so….single minded it’s exhilarating to watch her – it’s fun to watch Taylor hating on the insanely likable and loveable Brad – and this is not a horrible way to spend an hour.
Grade: B
TRUE BLOOD (HBO)
The pilot was pretty great. I’m into episode 4 now and it’s still pretty cool. It has the best opening sequence I’ve seen in a long time which sets the tone for a pretty quirky hour. Anna Paquin, so fucking masterful as Holly Hunter’s little girl in THE PIANO has grown up and now sports a country bumpkin accent and resembles a young Amy Poehler. Which is to say she’s not only cute, but there is depth to her performance and I like the portrayal. I even like the idiot brother who keeps getting involved with woman who wind up dead. His “trip” on V-blood was awesome. In fact, I mostly like all the characters. And there are fascinating new Vampire rules and this awesome idea of a Japanese company marketing fake blood to vampires that has all the nutrients of the real thing. Somehow this show got a weird rap – but it’s a fine show and I’m kind of hooked. This is really interesting new work from Alan Ball and I think it’s a really fun and creepy hour. And I suspect it’s going to get even better.
Grade: B +
JIM NORTON: MONSTER RAIN (HBO)
Jim Norton is the real thing. He’s really funny. Really dirty. And shockingly open about his own sexuality and past adventures - or he has a wild imagination. His recounting of a 3-way with Ron Jeremy was insanely funny and humbling – and at the end of the set, he says “I don’t want to get political now at the end of my set, but….” (joke too dirty to be printed here.) Highly recommended.
Grade: B +
JIM NORTON’S DOWN & DIRTY COMIC SHOW (HBO)
This is a series that has Norton hosting a quartet of comedians over the space of an hour. This first hour I watched featured Artie Lange, Jimmy Florentine, Whitney Cummings and Anthony Jeselnik, who was really funny but way too taken with himself. He did have a great opening line though “My family was a lot like the Brady Bunch. My dad died of AIDS.” Great opening, too bad he spent another 10 minutes marveling at his own opening. Whitney Cummings, aside from one good dirty joke regarding her name, was pretty useless. Jimmy Florentine was worth the price of admission as he masterfully tore through a hilariously profane set, and Artie Lange closed with a less dirty, but very funny set. Norton himself is awesome – and the show actually has the timing and vibe of being in one of those clubs with these dirty minded comics. Pretty awesome.
Grade: A
DEXTER (SHOWTIME)
Opened its season with a first rate episode that sets up the entire arc of the season. I thought DEXTER had a really good first year, and in some ways, even a better 2nd year. I still think the sister is a bad actress, but she’s slightly less annoying this year. Jimmy Smits, who I thought ruined NYPD BLUE, was terrific in the pilot and the whole idea of Dexter killing somebody by accident is a great way to start the season. Looks like another thrilling ride.
Grade: A
UPDATE: Episode 2
Not so much. Seemed to go through the paces in a rather clumsy way, and set up a real credibility problem with the plot. Also – Smits’ acting got a lot worse and his “accent” – I don’t know what the fuck he’s up to. And the sister is so bad in ep 2, it almost had to be seen to be believed. Lastly, who’s responsible for the horrendous haircut Dexter’s sporting?
Grade: B -
HOLE IN THE WALL (FOX)
This is kind of cool, for a minute. The coolest part of the show is when the hole comes out of the wall and the person tries – almost always unsuccessfully – to shape themselves like the hole – and it just happens so fast. It’s really funny and wild – for about 30 minutes.
Grade: C-
90210 (THE CW)
Well, now that Brenda left in typical fashion – they went out of their way to have her remain the bitch we always thought she was – it’s just Kelly and the cast of newbies. Sorry, no can do. The sensibility seems…off. But then again, to be fair, I liked watching the old characters. I wish they would just gather the old actors back and have it just be about them. But I hated that they made Brenda a total bitch again – as if she hasn’t grown in years – maybe the actress hasn’t – I have no idea – but certainly you wish for more from these characters. Oh, the rest of the show – unwatchable.
Grade: D
RED BELT (DVD)
The newest David Mamet film deals with mixed martial-arts. Like many a Mamet film, there is a House Of Games structure to this, and getting there is most of the fun. I’ve never seen the lead before but he was great. All the Mamet regulars are here like Joe Mantegna, etc – but the real surprise is how good Tim Allen is as a humorless action star. The last half hour of this gets a little strained and Mamet never seems to figure out how to shoot action – a real shame because it mars the ending of this film. But up until then, this is a pretty neat ride.
Grade: B -
JUST FOR FUN: Grades on Mamet movies: (these are just films written & directed by Mamet – so no GLENGARRY)
HOUSE OF GAMES: A +
THINGS CHANGE: B +
HOMICIDE: C
OLEANA: B
THE WINSLOW BOY: C
STATE & MAIN: B +
THE DEWEY COX STORY (SPECIAL UNRATED 2 DISC DVD)
If you loved this movie like I did, this is a great way to enjoy it. Not only does it contain both the theatrical and unrated versions (called “the unbearably long director’s cut”) but has great commentary from all the principals, great shorts, Apatow disc regulars like line-o-rama and a crazy amount of deleted or extended scenes. Best of all, there’s a whole Dewey Cox concert on disc 2 not really seen in the movie. This is a great, funny film that I think will find its audience. Highly underrated and highly recommended.
Grade: A
INVINCIBLE (HBO)
Inspired by the true story of Vince Papale, Marky Mark Wahlburg plays a man with nothing to lose who ignores staggering odds and makes his dreams of football glory come true. When the coach (Greg Kinnear – very good) of hometown football team hosted an unprecedented open tryout, the public consensus was that it was a waste of time -- no one good enough to play professional football was going to be found this way. Certainly no one like Papale -- a down-on-his-luck, 30 year-old, substitute teacher and part-time bartender who never even played college football. He also had a failing marriage and no visible means of income. In one humiliated scene, his phone is turned off but he suits up and goes to school to do his sub-teacher bit, and they tell him they tried to call but that they won’t be needing him this summer. Then his wife, convinced he’ll never become anything – leaves him. But against these odds, Papale made the team and soon found himself living every fan's fantasy -- moving from his cheap seats in the upper deck to standing on the field as a professional football player. This is a good but not great movie with a great soundtrack and some serious allusions of being an adult RUDY – but this is no RUDY – it’s just kind of okay. It just never really takes flight.
Grade: B –
CALIFORNICATION (SHOWTIME)
Got off to a rousing start with an episode that picks up shortly after least season’s finale. Hank is now back with his ex-wife when he “accidently” goes down on another girl. Evan Handler is solid as Hank’s agent, and the show seemed to gel right off the bat this season. Still not crazy about the actress that plays Evan Handler’s wife, but otherwise, this is a first class offering about one of the most depraved characters on television. God bless Showtime for letting the creators run free with this stuff.
Grade: A
I just watched the CHRISTIAN THE LION youtube video and God – that has to be the best minute of media out there. I swear to God.
AT THE MOVIES (ABC – NEW VERSION)
I was at football Sunday and there was a discussion about whether or not this new version – without the endorsement of series creator Roger Ebert and series long-stay Richard Roeper (who reportedly has his own review series in the works – don’t hold your breath) but I have to admit – I think the new version is just fine. I like the reviewers even if they are a bit young and inexperienced. I like the round up they do on one movie a week where they talk to a whole bunch of critics over one film – and so far, so good. It’s essentially the same show with a bit more sexiness thrown in – frankly, I preferred Siskel & Ebert – their bickering over films was one of the high points of the show. But that ship has sailed. I wished the new version would’ve starred Roeper and my favorite stand-in critic, A.O. Scott (I went to sleepaway camp with him) – but the new guys are okay and this is still a great way to find out about the new weeks releases.
Grade: B
Reality TV hit a brand new low with the absolutely wretched, God-Awful PARIS HILTONS’S NEW BFF.
I AM LEGEND (DVD – AND ALTERNATE ENDING)
I recently re-watched this film (most of it) on HBO. My friend R.C. asked me to check out the “alternate ending.” Look, I really liked this movie – but I’ve now seen 3 “alternate endings” and they’re all kind of the same. The film – still rocks. I did a little research on the book, and found out that I AM LEGEND, the original novel, was the basis for most Hollywood zombie films and even preceded George A. Romero’s NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD.
Grade: A -
Just for fun, let’s review the Romero films:
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD: A +
DAWN OF THE DEAD (1979) A +
DAY OF THE DEAD (1985) B +
DAWN OF THE DEAD (remake) B +
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (Savini 90s remake) B (script by Romero!)
KNIGHTRIDERS (Romero): A +
THE CRAZIES: C
MARTIN: B
THE DARK HALF: D
MONKEY SHINES: B -
NEW YORK GOES HOLLYWOOD (VH1)
Taylor Made shows up. Then he angrily storms off. New York goes to an audition and gets it (sort of.) The producers offer her “I LOVE NEW YORK 3” – and overall, this thing didn’t quite live up to its potential. It felt like it needed to get deeper into NY – but there may not be all much there. I think her best bet is to do another I LOVE NY and involve her insane mother again. Tiffany is still some kind of star and this series did have plenty of great moments – but I’m ready for I LOVE NY 3!
Grade: B -
THE 25th AVN PORN AWARDS (SHOWTIME)
The real news here is that I think this was the 2nd or 3rd time that AVN has actually broadcast the event, which makes it almost sort of mainstream. In a way. Anyway – the awards, the stars – it’s all pretentious and laughable and hilarious for all the wrong reasons. To see an actress come up and deliver a truly inspirational speech about being awarded “Best Anal” is something to see. They also had a major Howard Stern show contingency on hand. First, the MC of the show is the great Greg Fitszimmons, a regular on the Stern show, a GREAT comic and he also has his own show under Howard’s umbrella channel. Greg was REALLY funny, but then it was just as funny to see him have to trade barbs with porn stars like…Anal Cassidy – seriously – and his perfect comic timing mixed with these porn stars horrific comic timing and mispronciation of the jokes – that was pretty funny in itself. Then they bring out Artie Lange – who not only looked really embarrassed to be there, but somehow got roped into doing this absolutely ridiculously unfunny and awful bit where he introduces Nick Manning – I can’t say what was said because it was way pornographic, but it wasn’t funny and it seemed like Artie was there as a favor to someone. And probably for the free trip to Vegas. Then they even brought out Richard Christy and Benji Bronc – two more Stern regulars, for a truly unfunny bit that I can’t even remember. By the time Chi Chi Larue took the stage with this unfunny drag queen shtick – I had had enough.
Grade: C
I love the new Bruce Springsteen song “The Wrestler” which Ally L. sent me the mp3 of. It’s probably one of my favorite recent Bruce songs, and if the Mickey Rourke film about a worn down wrestler is half as good as the song, I can understand why it was a festival sensation. It was directed by the brilliant Darren Aronofsky (Requiem for a Dream) and I can’t wait to see it. But I love that fucking song.
How bad is that video that seems to be everywhere for Kelly Pickler’s “Beautiful?” She’s talking to all these kids about how beautiful their body image should be – and she sings it while flaunting the flotation device tits she had surgically installed last year!!!! Now don’t get me wrong – I have NO PROBLEM with Kelly’s enhanced boobage – frankly, I like it – but let’s not be hypocritical, either. The song is okay – I just don’t know why she felt – okay, this is a ridiculous item. Forget I said anything.
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Something about Peter not being able to stop singing “the bird is the word” – I don’t remember much else about it.
Grade: B –
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
A sub-par tale about Bart getting ahold of Dennis Leary’s cell phone.
Grade: C –
SOUTH PARK (COMEDY CENTRAL – isn’t that a weird fucking name for a network?)
A sub-par tale about Cartman being racist against the Chinese – I couldn’t finish it. This show is sometimes brilliant – not this time.
Grade: C –
CHRIS ROCK: Kill the Messenger (HBO)
Very good show. The rap on Rock is that every other special is great. His first BRING THE PAIN was legendary. Frankly his next two – not so great. But then his 4th special “Never Scared” was da bomb. In this, his 5th special – HBO went through the trouble of taping the same routine in London, New York and South Africa – which means that in the middle of routines, they cut to a different locale of Chris with a different audience and a different outfit – but doing the same bit. This innovative idea was cool for about five minutes, then got in the way and really distracted from what was a very very funny set. Not as good as BRING THE PAIN, not quite on the same level as NEVER SCARED, but in that top three. He’s a funny mother fucker, I just wasn’t crazy about all the weird jump cutting. But his routines on the election were really good. His ideas about sex and orgasms were hilarious – and hopefully next time they’ll just present a complete show. Still, this is not to be missed. This is one of our very best comedians working today in great form.
Grade: B +
There is a lot of stuff I never got to review here, but I still have every GENERATION KILL on my dvr, I still have last week’s HOUSE, I’m looking forward to CRASH on STARZ, looking forward to LIFE ON MARS – and I just got the DVDs of WE OWN THE NIGHT and FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL which I heard was really good, and I’m sorry, but again – this is the end of the line for this blog for the moment. I’m always here via email here at TheDigitalCouch@aol.com
Thanks again for reading all these years and I’m sure we’ll meet again.
Sincerely yours,
Digital Couch.
Peace and thanks for all the fish.
DIGITAL COUCH out.
10.10.08
THE DEBATES (ABC/CBS/FOX/NBC/CNBC/CSPAN)
I have no interest in sharing my politics here, as I’m sure you have no interest in reading about them. But the actor who plays Obama is fantastic – doing this sort of – straight-man slow-burn while the actor playing McCain is wonderful. He makes McCain sad and pathetic – but very aggressive about his opinions and a bit like a dog wanting his belly scratched. Okay – I was trying something out here that didn’t really work – but basically – it doesn’t matter whose side you’re on – the debates are fucking hilarious. Biden seemed like a patient grade school teacher with a rambunctious young student. Palin seems like a lot of fun. Imagine getting her drunk? And McCain seems like this defeated sad/funny clown while Obama seems bright but about as humorless as they come. And his anger is so subtle. As far as who gets my vote – what do you care? But as for sole entertainment value:
Grade: A +
THE SARAH SILVERMAN SHOW (COMEDY CENTRAL)
Sarah returns with a bong! The first episode charted Sarah’s entry into the world of pot with hilarious results. The thing about leaving herself messages when she’s high – so brilliant – so true – not that I would know. I am SO GLAD this show is back - one my very favorites and Sarah and her talented cast will be a welcome addition this season. And based on the premeire - it's gonna be a great one.
Grade: A +
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (NBC)
Anne Hathaway and The Killers. Is it just me or is this ever-so-slowly getting slightly funnier. I actually laughed a few times and I thought Hathaway was a pretty good guest host. I love that Tina Fey is coming every week thus far to do Palin, and her bit about asking Biden if she can call him Joe, “because I practiced some zingers where I call you Joe” was hilarious. And some of the sketches were legitimately funny – The Killers were GREAT. I’ll tell you who is NOT funny– the new heavy set guy with the curly hair – this week we discovered that he can dance. While I’m not immune to the hilarity of a fat man dancing, I don’t know – they seem to really be pushing him and that woman who started last season whose name I still do not know but seems to fit in okay (I guess also on the heavyset side compared to the other woman.) She’s okay if not memorable – so far, he’s the killer of comedy. Literally.
Grade: B -
LIFE AND TIMES OF TIM (HBO)
Laugh out loud funny, this is one of the best things I’ve ever seen. No review – just watch it. It’s on the dirty side, so live a little.
Grade: A +
UPDATE:
I just watched the 2nd episode. Hilarious. Truly must-see. It’s insane, profane, and perfect.
Grade: A +
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
Continues to be a fairly uninspired effort. This had a couple of funny seasons in it, and I have no doubt that there will be future funny eps – but last season and this new one are anything but.
Grade: C -
GONE COUNTRY (CMT)
After a few mellow episodes, this built to the big show, where everyone had to sing their newly written song in front of a live audience and John Rich picks the winner. It was shocking how close Lorenzo Lamas came to pulling it off, Sean Young at the very least appeared normal and to have a good time, even if she sounded like shit. The guy who used to be in N’synch I thought personally had one of the best songs – but the two guys that had it down to the wire were none other than Jermaine Jackson – who is the sweatiest mother fucker I’ve ever seen, and who – frankly – I didn’t really get his song. But Sebastian Bach had a brilliant song about drinking called BATTLE WITH THE BOTTLE that was actually really good and he ended up winning the competition. This was a good series with a great ending. Looking forward to the next season of this.
Grade: B +
PRISON BREAK (FOX)
Has re-invented itself yet again – now it’s just the best action show – maybe ever. This last episode, with Michael going back to break out Mahone – was one of the best moments of the season. This is a unique show in that it really seemed to have stopped giving a shit about getting new fans and truly plays to the core audience. If you’re not one of them – go out and rent every season – this is THAT good.
Grade: A +
UPDATE: PRISON BREAK – the next episode
I just caught last night. The one in Vegas. Very outrageous, very slick, and there is nothing better than watching Theodore Bagwell (T-Bag) get fucked over. The thing with Sucre and the old man and his wife was priceless.
Grade: A +
THE SHIELD (FX)
What can I say? I’m the biggest fan of this show, but these final episodes are just sort of lacking in almost every way. The writing seems off, the acting is ok, the direction is weird – the storyline – while somewhat rewarding I guess to long time fans of the show, is fairly ridiculous and convoluted. I never really loved the money train season and now this just seems like a big re-do. I don’t believe this phony war Vic started – I REALLY don’t believe the bad acting and improbable situations of Vic’s daughter, Cassidy (played by Vic’s real-life daughter – poor thing. It’s as if someone said “just seem angry and sullen every second and you’ll win an Emmy!” Not only that – but the Billings stuff is worthless, the thing with the young serial killer in training is pretty ridiculous – worst of all, this Fed, played by a shitty actress named Lauren Holden (I’ve actually seen her in a movie from 10 years ago – she was bad then, worse now) is reciting some of the all time worst “tough banter” dialog – this thing is a mess. I think there are 5 eps left. This thing better really have some tricks up its sleeve to regain its good name and go out in style. But I’m not encouraged. It’s still The Shield – but it’s just not working like it used to – in their final season. Here’s hoping things pick up in the last batch of eps, which, if I’m looking at the show historically – they will. I just hope it won’t be too late.
Grade: B –
UPDATE: THE SHIELD (the latest ep)
FINALLY - things are back on track! They FINALLY put an end to the ridiculous Mexican-Armenian war thing – and they brought back some urgency to the storyline with our newest favorite subject of the last few seasons – the Vic/Shane/Lem situation. Last night’s episode was tense and gripping and surprising – I’m now looking forward to the last 5 or 6 original episodes left. They still need to get completely back on track – but they are more than half way there with this terrific episode.
Grade: A -
THE RACHEL ZOE PROJECT (BRAVO)
I have no idea why I like this show so much – I don’t know much about Zoe, except that she’s a polarizing big time designer in NYC and that she’s married and has this very successful design biz. In the few eps I watched, she did outfits for Kate Hudson, Debra Messing and a few others – but the show is more about her day to life, her intereactions with her staff – she has a staff of two. The droll, put-upon Taylor - always seemingly out of patience. And the very gay, very excitable Brad, who has impeccable taste and an impeccable way of getting himself into trouble with Rachel. But, honestly – I don’t find Rachel – who the media really loves to eviscerate – all that bad. She’s completely humorless, but she seems nice enough – she loves what she does and evidently she’s really good at it. And the show is particularly well-produced and frankly, I think gives a lot more info on the fashion world than a lot of other fashion shows. And Rachel is just so….single minded it’s exhilarating to watch her – it’s fun to watch Taylor hating on the insanely likable and loveable Brad – and this is not a horrible way to spend an hour.
Grade: B
TRUE BLOOD (HBO)
The pilot was pretty great. I’m into episode 4 now and it’s still pretty cool. It has the best opening sequence I’ve seen in a long time which sets the tone for a pretty quirky hour. Anna Paquin, so fucking masterful as Holly Hunter’s little girl in THE PIANO has grown up and now sports a country bumpkin accent and resembles a young Amy Poehler. Which is to say she’s not only cute, but there is depth to her performance and I like the portrayal. I even like the idiot brother who keeps getting involved with woman who wind up dead. His “trip” on V-blood was awesome. In fact, I mostly like all the characters. And there are fascinating new Vampire rules and this awesome idea of a Japanese company marketing fake blood to vampires that has all the nutrients of the real thing. Somehow this show got a weird rap – but it’s a fine show and I’m kind of hooked. This is really interesting new work from Alan Ball and I think it’s a really fun and creepy hour. And I suspect it’s going to get even better.
Grade: B +
JIM NORTON: MONSTER RAIN (HBO)
Jim Norton is the real thing. He’s really funny. Really dirty. And shockingly open about his own sexuality and past adventures - or he has a wild imagination. His recounting of a 3-way with Ron Jeremy was insanely funny and humbling – and at the end of the set, he says “I don’t want to get political now at the end of my set, but….” (joke too dirty to be printed here.) Highly recommended.
Grade: B +
JIM NORTON’S DOWN & DIRTY COMIC SHOW (HBO)
This is a series that has Norton hosting a quartet of comedians over the space of an hour. This first hour I watched featured Artie Lange, Jimmy Florentine, Whitney Cummings and Anthony Jeselnik, who was really funny but way too taken with himself. He did have a great opening line though “My family was a lot like the Brady Bunch. My dad died of AIDS.” Great opening, too bad he spent another 10 minutes marveling at his own opening. Whitney Cummings, aside from one good dirty joke regarding her name, was pretty useless. Jimmy Florentine was worth the price of admission as he masterfully tore through a hilariously profane set, and Artie Lange closed with a less dirty, but very funny set. Norton himself is awesome – and the show actually has the timing and vibe of being in one of those clubs with these dirty minded comics. Pretty awesome.
Grade: A
DEXTER (SHOWTIME)
Opened its season with a first rate episode that sets up the entire arc of the season. I thought DEXTER had a really good first year, and in some ways, even a better 2nd year. I still think the sister is a bad actress, but she’s slightly less annoying this year. Jimmy Smits, who I thought ruined NYPD BLUE, was terrific in the pilot and the whole idea of Dexter killing somebody by accident is a great way to start the season. Looks like another thrilling ride.
Grade: A
UPDATE: Episode 2
Not so much. Seemed to go through the paces in a rather clumsy way, and set up a real credibility problem with the plot. Also – Smits’ acting got a lot worse and his “accent” – I don’t know what the fuck he’s up to. And the sister is so bad in ep 2, it almost had to be seen to be believed. Lastly, who’s responsible for the horrendous haircut Dexter’s sporting?
Grade: B -
HOLE IN THE WALL (FOX)
This is kind of cool, for a minute. The coolest part of the show is when the hole comes out of the wall and the person tries – almost always unsuccessfully – to shape themselves like the hole – and it just happens so fast. It’s really funny and wild – for about 30 minutes.
Grade: C-
90210 (THE CW)
Well, now that Brenda left in typical fashion – they went out of their way to have her remain the bitch we always thought she was – it’s just Kelly and the cast of newbies. Sorry, no can do. The sensibility seems…off. But then again, to be fair, I liked watching the old characters. I wish they would just gather the old actors back and have it just be about them. But I hated that they made Brenda a total bitch again – as if she hasn’t grown in years – maybe the actress hasn’t – I have no idea – but certainly you wish for more from these characters. Oh, the rest of the show – unwatchable.
Grade: D
RED BELT (DVD)
The newest David Mamet film deals with mixed martial-arts. Like many a Mamet film, there is a House Of Games structure to this, and getting there is most of the fun. I’ve never seen the lead before but he was great. All the Mamet regulars are here like Joe Mantegna, etc – but the real surprise is how good Tim Allen is as a humorless action star. The last half hour of this gets a little strained and Mamet never seems to figure out how to shoot action – a real shame because it mars the ending of this film. But up until then, this is a pretty neat ride.
Grade: B -
JUST FOR FUN: Grades on Mamet movies: (these are just films written & directed by Mamet – so no GLENGARRY)
HOUSE OF GAMES: A +
THINGS CHANGE: B +
HOMICIDE: C
OLEANA: B
THE WINSLOW BOY: C
STATE & MAIN: B +
THE DEWEY COX STORY (SPECIAL UNRATED 2 DISC DVD)
If you loved this movie like I did, this is a great way to enjoy it. Not only does it contain both the theatrical and unrated versions (called “the unbearably long director’s cut”) but has great commentary from all the principals, great shorts, Apatow disc regulars like line-o-rama and a crazy amount of deleted or extended scenes. Best of all, there’s a whole Dewey Cox concert on disc 2 not really seen in the movie. This is a great, funny film that I think will find its audience. Highly underrated and highly recommended.
Grade: A
INVINCIBLE (HBO)
Inspired by the true story of Vince Papale, Marky Mark Wahlburg plays a man with nothing to lose who ignores staggering odds and makes his dreams of football glory come true. When the coach (Greg Kinnear – very good) of hometown football team hosted an unprecedented open tryout, the public consensus was that it was a waste of time -- no one good enough to play professional football was going to be found this way. Certainly no one like Papale -- a down-on-his-luck, 30 year-old, substitute teacher and part-time bartender who never even played college football. He also had a failing marriage and no visible means of income. In one humiliated scene, his phone is turned off but he suits up and goes to school to do his sub-teacher bit, and they tell him they tried to call but that they won’t be needing him this summer. Then his wife, convinced he’ll never become anything – leaves him. But against these odds, Papale made the team and soon found himself living every fan's fantasy -- moving from his cheap seats in the upper deck to standing on the field as a professional football player. This is a good but not great movie with a great soundtrack and some serious allusions of being an adult RUDY – but this is no RUDY – it’s just kind of okay. It just never really takes flight.
Grade: B –
CALIFORNICATION (SHOWTIME)
Got off to a rousing start with an episode that picks up shortly after least season’s finale. Hank is now back with his ex-wife when he “accidently” goes down on another girl. Evan Handler is solid as Hank’s agent, and the show seemed to gel right off the bat this season. Still not crazy about the actress that plays Evan Handler’s wife, but otherwise, this is a first class offering about one of the most depraved characters on television. God bless Showtime for letting the creators run free with this stuff.
Grade: A
I just watched the CHRISTIAN THE LION youtube video and God – that has to be the best minute of media out there. I swear to God.
AT THE MOVIES (ABC – NEW VERSION)
I was at football Sunday and there was a discussion about whether or not this new version – without the endorsement of series creator Roger Ebert and series long-stay Richard Roeper (who reportedly has his own review series in the works – don’t hold your breath) but I have to admit – I think the new version is just fine. I like the reviewers even if they are a bit young and inexperienced. I like the round up they do on one movie a week where they talk to a whole bunch of critics over one film – and so far, so good. It’s essentially the same show with a bit more sexiness thrown in – frankly, I preferred Siskel & Ebert – their bickering over films was one of the high points of the show. But that ship has sailed. I wished the new version would’ve starred Roeper and my favorite stand-in critic, A.O. Scott (I went to sleepaway camp with him) – but the new guys are okay and this is still a great way to find out about the new weeks releases.
Grade: B
Reality TV hit a brand new low with the absolutely wretched, God-Awful PARIS HILTONS’S NEW BFF.
I AM LEGEND (DVD – AND ALTERNATE ENDING)
I recently re-watched this film (most of it) on HBO. My friend R.C. asked me to check out the “alternate ending.” Look, I really liked this movie – but I’ve now seen 3 “alternate endings” and they’re all kind of the same. The film – still rocks. I did a little research on the book, and found out that I AM LEGEND, the original novel, was the basis for most Hollywood zombie films and even preceded George A. Romero’s NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD.
Grade: A -
Just for fun, let’s review the Romero films:
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD: A +
DAWN OF THE DEAD (1979) A +
DAY OF THE DEAD (1985) B +
DAWN OF THE DEAD (remake) B +
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (Savini 90s remake) B (script by Romero!)
KNIGHTRIDERS (Romero): A +
THE CRAZIES: C
MARTIN: B
THE DARK HALF: D
MONKEY SHINES: B -
NEW YORK GOES HOLLYWOOD (VH1)
Taylor Made shows up. Then he angrily storms off. New York goes to an audition and gets it (sort of.) The producers offer her “I LOVE NEW YORK 3” – and overall, this thing didn’t quite live up to its potential. It felt like it needed to get deeper into NY – but there may not be all much there. I think her best bet is to do another I LOVE NY and involve her insane mother again. Tiffany is still some kind of star and this series did have plenty of great moments – but I’m ready for I LOVE NY 3!
Grade: B -
THE 25th AVN PORN AWARDS (SHOWTIME)
The real news here is that I think this was the 2nd or 3rd time that AVN has actually broadcast the event, which makes it almost sort of mainstream. In a way. Anyway – the awards, the stars – it’s all pretentious and laughable and hilarious for all the wrong reasons. To see an actress come up and deliver a truly inspirational speech about being awarded “Best Anal” is something to see. They also had a major Howard Stern show contingency on hand. First, the MC of the show is the great Greg Fitszimmons, a regular on the Stern show, a GREAT comic and he also has his own show under Howard’s umbrella channel. Greg was REALLY funny, but then it was just as funny to see him have to trade barbs with porn stars like…Anal Cassidy – seriously – and his perfect comic timing mixed with these porn stars horrific comic timing and mispronciation of the jokes – that was pretty funny in itself. Then they bring out Artie Lange – who not only looked really embarrassed to be there, but somehow got roped into doing this absolutely ridiculously unfunny and awful bit where he introduces Nick Manning – I can’t say what was said because it was way pornographic, but it wasn’t funny and it seemed like Artie was there as a favor to someone. And probably for the free trip to Vegas. Then they even brought out Richard Christy and Benji Bronc – two more Stern regulars, for a truly unfunny bit that I can’t even remember. By the time Chi Chi Larue took the stage with this unfunny drag queen shtick – I had had enough.
Grade: C
I love the new Bruce Springsteen song “The Wrestler” which Ally L. sent me the mp3 of. It’s probably one of my favorite recent Bruce songs, and if the Mickey Rourke film about a worn down wrestler is half as good as the song, I can understand why it was a festival sensation. It was directed by the brilliant Darren Aronofsky (Requiem for a Dream) and I can’t wait to see it. But I love that fucking song.
How bad is that video that seems to be everywhere for Kelly Pickler’s “Beautiful?” She’s talking to all these kids about how beautiful their body image should be – and she sings it while flaunting the flotation device tits she had surgically installed last year!!!! Now don’t get me wrong – I have NO PROBLEM with Kelly’s enhanced boobage – frankly, I like it – but let’s not be hypocritical, either. The song is okay – I just don’t know why she felt – okay, this is a ridiculous item. Forget I said anything.
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Something about Peter not being able to stop singing “the bird is the word” – I don’t remember much else about it.
Grade: B –
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
A sub-par tale about Bart getting ahold of Dennis Leary’s cell phone.
Grade: C –
SOUTH PARK (COMEDY CENTRAL – isn’t that a weird fucking name for a network?)
A sub-par tale about Cartman being racist against the Chinese – I couldn’t finish it. This show is sometimes brilliant – not this time.
Grade: C –
CHRIS ROCK: Kill the Messenger (HBO)
Very good show. The rap on Rock is that every other special is great. His first BRING THE PAIN was legendary. Frankly his next two – not so great. But then his 4th special “Never Scared” was da bomb. In this, his 5th special – HBO went through the trouble of taping the same routine in London, New York and South Africa – which means that in the middle of routines, they cut to a different locale of Chris with a different audience and a different outfit – but doing the same bit. This innovative idea was cool for about five minutes, then got in the way and really distracted from what was a very very funny set. Not as good as BRING THE PAIN, not quite on the same level as NEVER SCARED, but in that top three. He’s a funny mother fucker, I just wasn’t crazy about all the weird jump cutting. But his routines on the election were really good. His ideas about sex and orgasms were hilarious – and hopefully next time they’ll just present a complete show. Still, this is not to be missed. This is one of our very best comedians working today in great form.
Grade: B +
There is a lot of stuff I never got to review here, but I still have every GENERATION KILL on my dvr, I still have last week’s HOUSE, I’m looking forward to CRASH on STARZ, looking forward to LIFE ON MARS – and I just got the DVDs of WE OWN THE NIGHT and FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL which I heard was really good, and I’m sorry, but again – this is the end of the line for this blog for the moment. I’m always here via email here at TheDigitalCouch@aol.com
Thanks again for reading all these years and I’m sure we’ll meet again.
Sincerely yours,
Digital Couch.
2008/10/04
JZ leaves GLAM GOD! The fix is in!
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (NBC)
Was not horrible this week. Tina Fey was funny as Sarah Palin. There were some funny sketches. I already forgot who hosted but I remember Duffy being kind of great. Is this show every going to be great again? It’s been five or so years since they’ve had a decent season. Hmm…and Seth Myers was made head writer a few years ago….
Grade: C -
GLAM GOD (VH1)
Wha’ happened! So long, Jess! JZ finally got the boot even though I liked her designs a lot better than some of those that stayed – but still, she came in fifth place! She should’ve won, but – this is a reality show. By the way, for those of you watching – how much of a fucking douchebag is Ignashio, the constipated odd looking bald buck-toothed bi-sexual cowboy? If he wins it must be because they all felt sorry for him. Still, Jess went out in great style and humor, and in the mind of the DIGITAL COUCH, Jess wins!
Grade: A
Jess Zaino: A+
WEEDS (SHOWTIME)
After a reinvented season where the focus of the show was a little unclear, WEEDS turns out to have many tricks up its sleeve in its last batch of first run episodes. The last three eps of this were absolutely hilarious, profane, morally ambiguous and terrifically exciting. With a doozey of a cliffhanger and many situations resolved and new ones revived (does Andy really love Nancy?) – I can hardly wait for season 6. Who knew after 5 seasons this show had this much life left in it? Kudos to the creative team for allowing the show to evolve to this point. Mary Louise Parker continues to amaze as Nancy Botwin. And Kevin Nealon brought his character to an all new low this season – fantastic.
Grade: A
BRIAN WILSON “LUCKY OLD SUN” (AUDIO CD)
Kind of a cool concept CD without many great songs. It’s short – on the 32 minute side – and there are flashes of old Beach Boys genius in the air – but really, this feels more like a one-off novelty than anything else. Not as good as SMILE and nowhere near as good as his 86’ self-titled masterpiece, BRIAN WILSON.
Grade: C
THE EMMY AWARDS (ABC)
This is not good. A few people scored. Bob Hope, Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, Jimmy Kimmel, Ricky Gervais….can’t think of anyone else. Most of it was unwatchable – the 5 hosts looked so insanely out of place that they should’ve probably been replaced during the broadcast. You know things are bad when Ryan Seacrest comes off as the most polished. But don’t blame them – blame the guy who thought that putting 5 reality hosts to run the Emmys was a good idea. The Josh Groban thing with him singing all the themes – well, that was just unfortunate and I’m sorry we all had to witness that. The DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES bullshit presentation made me sick and that weird move of Marcia Cross kissing Dana Delaney – it was just really cringe inducing. I’ve been watching the Emmys since I have been watching TV, and last night’s show was even worse than last year – which was the worst of all time. ABC – just imagine if you had your late night host - Jimmy Kimmel, did a superb job with NIGHT OF STARS - imagine if you had that guy actually hosting your show? Kathy Griffin was embarrassing, as was a dazed looking Christian Slater. As the night wore on, the jokes – those bad fucking jokes – they just grew worse and worse, and once again, THE AMAZING RACE won the Emmy for like – the 5th time in a row. Have you seen the show? It’s good but – 6 times? Is it THAT AMAZING? And Bryan Cranston over Jon Hamm? What is up with that??? Lastly, Heidi Klum might be the worst Emmy host, ever. She's fine on Project Runway - but my God, she was no camera-ready last Sunday night.
Grade: D
JIMMY KIMMEL’S NIGHT OF STARS (ABC)
In a zany take off of the pre-Oscar Barbara Walters special, Jimmy interviews a bunch of celebs but rather than a straight forward approach, this is satire in which Jimmy satirizes Walters in an attempt to get these celebs to cry. He was hilarious with Mike Phelps, asking him if there was a “little mermaid” in his life. The interview also included a hysterical parody of GREYS ANATOMY starring Phelps that’s probably making the rounds on YOUTUBE if you want to see it. When he introduced Tracey Morgan, he claimed that the job on SNL “got his family off welfare – 8 months later.” He also added that for 30 ROCK, Tracey was “almost nominated for an Emmy.” He even made Mr. Morgan cry, which lead to a tender embrace. He then egged Tracey on to destroy the set of “How I Married Your Mother” screaming about “Doogie Houser!” Morgan followed suit – with a baseball bat to that set. Ben Stein made a funny appearance, followed by a hilarious one-on-one with Selma Hayek that lead to a great singing duet between Jimmy and Selma in which Jimmy kept pleading for Selma to take her shirt off. That lead to a full blown musical number which probably should’ve been included in the actual Emmy telecast. The show concluded with Jimmy interviewing the 5 reality show hosts about what they planned for the Emmys – which was much funnier than anything the useless reality hosts actually did on the actual show. Why ABC didn’t just have Jimmy host the awards show is beyond me, but even if he does next year, I’d still love to see this hour become a perennial.
Grade: A +
MAD MEN (AMC)
Don Draper is finally called out on his bullshit by his wife. Jon Hamm is so good in this role it saddens me that I published a blog a few months ago that referred to Jon as PETER HAMM. My apologies to Jon – as he’s one of my very favorite actors working today and his performance not only should’ve taken home the Emmy Sunday night, but he’s now created the most interesting character on TV since Tony Soprano. And this show, by getting into some of the other characters and constantly upping the ante of what’s come before, has again become the event of the season.
Grade: A +
OASIS “NEW CD” (AUDIO CD)
I went into this skeptically. I’ve been a huge fan of OASIS since WONDERWALL and the MORNING GLORY CD. I even stayed with them through their last few worthless CDs. Up until about 3 CDs ago, they still managed to pull off a cool song here and there. But the last few yielded not one memorable tune. Not one. They went from cool pop songs with a Beatles-esque flair to bad harder-rock with useless Beatles-esque flairs. This new CD, their newest in years – blows. Hard. Not one fucking likable song. Well – there is ONE song that comes close to reminding me of why I used to love this band in the first place. But it’s not even that good. This is like – Dylan’s 80s period – just a string of one useless CD after the other. And they are so arrogant that when they go on tour they refuse to play the songs we like, opting for a full recreation of their latest piece of garbage. This new CD is basically like – hard guitar rock mixed with every old Beatles sound-effect that they could take out of context and drop it into their music as if would breathe life into this most careless collection. Track 5 is the only redeemable moment in this turgid hour. Will they ever make a good record again?
Grade: D –
THAT ONE SONG: B -
DANCING WITH THE STARS (ABC)
Ted McGinley got old and started wearing a very strange wig. But very likable. Jeff Ross was funny, Kim Kardashian looked downright retarded, with that strange bob of a haircut and her cold facial expressions. Chloris Leachman was funny, Susan Lucci was not. Brooke Burke might be the most dazzling woman on planet earth. But I can’t review the dancing – I truly know nothing of dance. I can only review the overall impact of the show. And I’ve always liked DANCING best when they give us what we want – true B-listers slumming it and making us remember what we loved about them while showing us how graceful they are. But this season, it seems like I don’t know half of these “stars” and to be honest – once the people I know are gone, I don’t stick around to find out who wins.
Grade: C
UPDATE: Now Kim Kardashian is gone. So am I.
BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
I think the reason I’ve been so hard on this show over the years is because it comes so frustratingly close to being great, yet it absolutely refuses to yield it’s “comedy” to let the drama breathe. And yes, there are moments of true wit, and yes, Spader and Shatner truly have unbelievable chemistry. But imagine if this had been set in the real world instead of this post-Ally McBeal weirdo universe. I remember the last season of McBeal, when a character would walk in the room they had this sort of, sound-off of all the character tics. The one guy would whistle, the dragon lady would hiss, someone would swoop their necks – all in drama-killing sound effects. This is essentially the same show with a classier cast and issue-oriented cases (mostly.) Shatner is great as Denny Crane, but they overplay his shtick shamelessly. James Spader, who seems to be finally underplaying Alan just a little bit, is undeniably great as Alan – but this show – in its last season, never cared enough about these characters to draw a real storyline – it’s just like, bad sitcom ideas with some juicy courtroom drama. Anyway, I’m sure I will watch this season to see what happens – but, if only the producers would just trust the acting and the stories to carry this instead of the Catskills Comedy vibe that infects every episode.
Grade: C +
UPDATE: BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
So – fucking BOSTON LEGAL bounced back the next week with an insanely good story that tackled the voting age, a little girl’s rape and a case against the big pharmaceutical companies – and it was great. They even made some inside jokes about this being their last year (Shatner asked “Can’t we try another time slot?”) but I have to admit – this was a great, gripping episode that definitely showed why Shatner and Spader have walked off with so many Emmys.
Grade: B +
TaLK TO ME (HBO)
Don Cheadle stars as real-life radio trailblazer Ralph "Petey" Greene, a high-school dropout and charismatic ex-con who leveraged a prison disc jockey gig into a stint at a Washington, D.C., radio station, a television show and an invitation to the White House. Don Cheadle is electrifying in the role, and the first hour of this film, which charts Greene’s ascension from Jail to radio star is fantastic. And then the film takes a completely unexpected turn (at least to me) and becomes less electrifying but very interesting. The supporting cast is stellar, and I personally thought this was going to be some kind of Howard Stern PRIVATE PARTS retread – but it’s completely original and real and highly recommended.
Grade: B
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 3rd episode)
Vince agrees to come to a sweet 16 for an appearance fee and Ari gets into an escalating war with his long time rival agent, Davies. This was the best of the first batch of 5th season eps, and the sweet 16 girl was hilarious and the place that Ari’s war goes was surprising, although – Ari is seen without his car at the end saying “there was a problem” that seemed to get left on the cutting room floor. Still – this was a particularly good episode.
Grade: A -
UPDATE: Next Episdoe.
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 4th episode)
Finally, after all that talk and wish fulfillment of the boys – we are returning to my favorite topic of ENTOURAGE – the art of the deal. This ep, which had Ari and Vince trying to sell SMOKEJUMPERS while E. tried to weasel out of his commitment to Vince’s old agent (I forget her name) – was awesome. Not a huge fan of Giavani Ribisi – but otherwise – these are killer eps.
Grade: A
DON’T FORGET THE LYRICS! (FOX)
The only thing more annoying than the two singing sisters was Wayne Brady himself. I would probably like this show if not for Brady. He’s either the most useless, phoniest guy in Hollywood, or just doing a great impression of it. The two sisters on the show I watched were so unbearable, seriously – did anybody see them? Yet I love the idea of this show. Replace the host and I’d watch it every week. Wayne Brady is to comedy what Adolph Hitler is to comedy.
Grade: C -
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Chef Ramsey had his toughest challenge yet with an incredibly arrogant young chef, and this continues to be one of the best reality shows on TV. Every episode is usually packed with great stuff and Ramsey is a great reality star. Funny, quick witted and real – although I still think the wrong person won last summers HELL’S KITCHEN.
Grade: A
ER (NBC)
ER debuted to their 15th and final season with a frantic and somber tale about Greg Pratt, who’s been on the show for 7 seasons. No spoilers – but this was as harrowing and tense hour as the show has had in a long time.
Grade B +
THE OFFICE ( NBC)
Would do you say about a show that believes itself to be the funniest show on television, but – in actuality – is one of the least funny shows on television?
Grade: C –
WAITRESS (HBO)
I loved this movie. I loved the story, I loved the theme – I especially loved the dialog. The dialog was as good as it gets in a wistful tale like this. At one point, Kerri Russel, who plays the married pregnant lead perfectly (and seems light years away from her FELICITY role,) is having this sort-of platonic relationship with a married man and they talk a lot in these scenes but it’s great talk. Kerri says in a VOICE OVER: “I became addicted to talking to him. And addicted to my words meaning something to someone.” The life observations in this are also real, shrewd and dead-on. At one point, Russel’s oafish husband, played to absolute perfection by Jeremy Sisto, doing yet another totally original take on the asshole, is having sex with her and asks her to talk dirty. She replies “what do you want me to…” and she’s interrupted by him finishing. This is just a great film and I really loved every single second of it. The director and co-star, Adrien Shelley did a superb job with this film, and days before its release she was killed in her apartment by a construction worker she had a beef with. I’m sketchy on the exact details – but – Jesus. In any case, I doubt she’d want the review to focus on her death, but if felt irresponsible not to mention it. Either way, she left behind 3 kids, a husband and a perfect film.
Grade: A+
IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA (FX)
I always thought this show tried way too hard to be funny and endearing. I recently watched a fresh batch of eps and found that I’m still right – except that the show is a bit more funny and endearing than I initially gave it credit for. Either they’ve really improved, or they’re simply more confident now in their storytelling and point of view. Danny Devito, such an 80s sitcom star – is completely reinvented as the wretched father and even though the main cast still tries a bit too hard - it all sort of works much better now and I will be watching and maybe catching up with some previous episodes. I sort of like the audacity of the stories even if I’m not always crazy about the execution.
Grade: B
KIMMEL LIVE! (ABC)
Jimmy had a really funny sketch on the other night – first they showed Matt Damon talking really vaguely about Sarah Palin and how it’s like a bad Disney movie –then they put a faux promo together that – this is impossible to explain – but really funny. Jon Hamm was on the same show and was hilarious with Jimmy.
Grade: A
IN BRUGES (DVD)
A very slow start that builds to a real depth in this look at these 2 hitmen who are laying low In Bruges after they’ve just completed some hit. It’s not at all an issue based film, but rather – it’s rumination on friendship and violence, movie violence – but it does so entertainingly and even wistfully. This is a rather unusual film in which there is nothing I can think of in recent memory that really compares to it. It’s truly unique and original and it will stay with you longer than you suspect. And by the way – Colin Farrell – best role of his career. Rest of the fairly unknown cast is as good – just can’t remember all their names. Highly recommended.
Grade: B +
BILL MAHR (HBO)
Is a great show, but did he really have to call Sarah Palin a bimbo? What is he?
Grade: A
OUTSIDERS INN (CMT)
So fucking ridiculous. So overly and obviously badly scripted. It started out okay – but by now, the 5th episode in, you literally can’t believe what you’re watching and how contrived, set up and god-awful the whole production is. You have these insane incidents that would NEVER happen in real life, then you have the three idiots, Bobby Brown, Maureen McCormick (Marcia Brady) and Carnie Wilson doing testimonials about there “night in jail.” (Because Maureen – in an insultingly scripted scene – was dancing with a cowboy in this empty bar when their central-casting hussies came by to make trouble and Maureen announced “Let’s throw down now!”) Then they got taken to the slammer. So you had Marcia Brady and Carnie Wilson complaining about being in jail because Maureen doesn’t back down from a fight….this is a fucking insult and everyone involved with this show should be arrested.
Grade: F -
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Reminded us why it’s one of the best half hours on Fox with their season premiere, in an episode that had Brian dressed as Snoopy (along with a Woodstock to complete the profane joke that followed,) Brian having sex with a civilian while Stewie proved himself to be more of a freak than ever, and ended with Cleveland (soon to be star of his own series) complaining that having sex with that woman is something he will never forget – she left him a genital wart. Brian and Cleveland looked at each other a long time after Cleveland revealed the information – and then Cleveland said “It hurts.”
Grade: A
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
Another winner – from the 20th season premiere. Ned and Homer became bounty hunters and Marge took to baking for an erotic bakery. While I think they missed about half the jokes re: the bakery – this show, after all these years, is still rock solid.
Grade: A
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
Not so much.
Grade: C -
Was not horrible this week. Tina Fey was funny as Sarah Palin. There were some funny sketches. I already forgot who hosted but I remember Duffy being kind of great. Is this show every going to be great again? It’s been five or so years since they’ve had a decent season. Hmm…and Seth Myers was made head writer a few years ago….
Grade: C -
GLAM GOD (VH1)
Wha’ happened! So long, Jess! JZ finally got the boot even though I liked her designs a lot better than some of those that stayed – but still, she came in fifth place! She should’ve won, but – this is a reality show. By the way, for those of you watching – how much of a fucking douchebag is Ignashio, the constipated odd looking bald buck-toothed bi-sexual cowboy? If he wins it must be because they all felt sorry for him. Still, Jess went out in great style and humor, and in the mind of the DIGITAL COUCH, Jess wins!
Grade: A
Jess Zaino: A+
WEEDS (SHOWTIME)
After a reinvented season where the focus of the show was a little unclear, WEEDS turns out to have many tricks up its sleeve in its last batch of first run episodes. The last three eps of this were absolutely hilarious, profane, morally ambiguous and terrifically exciting. With a doozey of a cliffhanger and many situations resolved and new ones revived (does Andy really love Nancy?) – I can hardly wait for season 6. Who knew after 5 seasons this show had this much life left in it? Kudos to the creative team for allowing the show to evolve to this point. Mary Louise Parker continues to amaze as Nancy Botwin. And Kevin Nealon brought his character to an all new low this season – fantastic.
Grade: A
BRIAN WILSON “LUCKY OLD SUN” (AUDIO CD)
Kind of a cool concept CD without many great songs. It’s short – on the 32 minute side – and there are flashes of old Beach Boys genius in the air – but really, this feels more like a one-off novelty than anything else. Not as good as SMILE and nowhere near as good as his 86’ self-titled masterpiece, BRIAN WILSON.
Grade: C
THE EMMY AWARDS (ABC)
This is not good. A few people scored. Bob Hope, Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, Jimmy Kimmel, Ricky Gervais….can’t think of anyone else. Most of it was unwatchable – the 5 hosts looked so insanely out of place that they should’ve probably been replaced during the broadcast. You know things are bad when Ryan Seacrest comes off as the most polished. But don’t blame them – blame the guy who thought that putting 5 reality hosts to run the Emmys was a good idea. The Josh Groban thing with him singing all the themes – well, that was just unfortunate and I’m sorry we all had to witness that. The DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES bullshit presentation made me sick and that weird move of Marcia Cross kissing Dana Delaney – it was just really cringe inducing. I’ve been watching the Emmys since I have been watching TV, and last night’s show was even worse than last year – which was the worst of all time. ABC – just imagine if you had your late night host - Jimmy Kimmel, did a superb job with NIGHT OF STARS - imagine if you had that guy actually hosting your show? Kathy Griffin was embarrassing, as was a dazed looking Christian Slater. As the night wore on, the jokes – those bad fucking jokes – they just grew worse and worse, and once again, THE AMAZING RACE won the Emmy for like – the 5th time in a row. Have you seen the show? It’s good but – 6 times? Is it THAT AMAZING? And Bryan Cranston over Jon Hamm? What is up with that??? Lastly, Heidi Klum might be the worst Emmy host, ever. She's fine on Project Runway - but my God, she was no camera-ready last Sunday night.
Grade: D
JIMMY KIMMEL’S NIGHT OF STARS (ABC)
In a zany take off of the pre-Oscar Barbara Walters special, Jimmy interviews a bunch of celebs but rather than a straight forward approach, this is satire in which Jimmy satirizes Walters in an attempt to get these celebs to cry. He was hilarious with Mike Phelps, asking him if there was a “little mermaid” in his life. The interview also included a hysterical parody of GREYS ANATOMY starring Phelps that’s probably making the rounds on YOUTUBE if you want to see it. When he introduced Tracey Morgan, he claimed that the job on SNL “got his family off welfare – 8 months later.” He also added that for 30 ROCK, Tracey was “almost nominated for an Emmy.” He even made Mr. Morgan cry, which lead to a tender embrace. He then egged Tracey on to destroy the set of “How I Married Your Mother” screaming about “Doogie Houser!” Morgan followed suit – with a baseball bat to that set. Ben Stein made a funny appearance, followed by a hilarious one-on-one with Selma Hayek that lead to a great singing duet between Jimmy and Selma in which Jimmy kept pleading for Selma to take her shirt off. That lead to a full blown musical number which probably should’ve been included in the actual Emmy telecast. The show concluded with Jimmy interviewing the 5 reality show hosts about what they planned for the Emmys – which was much funnier than anything the useless reality hosts actually did on the actual show. Why ABC didn’t just have Jimmy host the awards show is beyond me, but even if he does next year, I’d still love to see this hour become a perennial.
Grade: A +
MAD MEN (AMC)
Don Draper is finally called out on his bullshit by his wife. Jon Hamm is so good in this role it saddens me that I published a blog a few months ago that referred to Jon as PETER HAMM. My apologies to Jon – as he’s one of my very favorite actors working today and his performance not only should’ve taken home the Emmy Sunday night, but he’s now created the most interesting character on TV since Tony Soprano. And this show, by getting into some of the other characters and constantly upping the ante of what’s come before, has again become the event of the season.
Grade: A +
OASIS “NEW CD” (AUDIO CD)
I went into this skeptically. I’ve been a huge fan of OASIS since WONDERWALL and the MORNING GLORY CD. I even stayed with them through their last few worthless CDs. Up until about 3 CDs ago, they still managed to pull off a cool song here and there. But the last few yielded not one memorable tune. Not one. They went from cool pop songs with a Beatles-esque flair to bad harder-rock with useless Beatles-esque flairs. This new CD, their newest in years – blows. Hard. Not one fucking likable song. Well – there is ONE song that comes close to reminding me of why I used to love this band in the first place. But it’s not even that good. This is like – Dylan’s 80s period – just a string of one useless CD after the other. And they are so arrogant that when they go on tour they refuse to play the songs we like, opting for a full recreation of their latest piece of garbage. This new CD is basically like – hard guitar rock mixed with every old Beatles sound-effect that they could take out of context and drop it into their music as if would breathe life into this most careless collection. Track 5 is the only redeemable moment in this turgid hour. Will they ever make a good record again?
Grade: D –
THAT ONE SONG: B -
DANCING WITH THE STARS (ABC)
Ted McGinley got old and started wearing a very strange wig. But very likable. Jeff Ross was funny, Kim Kardashian looked downright retarded, with that strange bob of a haircut and her cold facial expressions. Chloris Leachman was funny, Susan Lucci was not. Brooke Burke might be the most dazzling woman on planet earth. But I can’t review the dancing – I truly know nothing of dance. I can only review the overall impact of the show. And I’ve always liked DANCING best when they give us what we want – true B-listers slumming it and making us remember what we loved about them while showing us how graceful they are. But this season, it seems like I don’t know half of these “stars” and to be honest – once the people I know are gone, I don’t stick around to find out who wins.
Grade: C
UPDATE: Now Kim Kardashian is gone. So am I.
BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
I think the reason I’ve been so hard on this show over the years is because it comes so frustratingly close to being great, yet it absolutely refuses to yield it’s “comedy” to let the drama breathe. And yes, there are moments of true wit, and yes, Spader and Shatner truly have unbelievable chemistry. But imagine if this had been set in the real world instead of this post-Ally McBeal weirdo universe. I remember the last season of McBeal, when a character would walk in the room they had this sort of, sound-off of all the character tics. The one guy would whistle, the dragon lady would hiss, someone would swoop their necks – all in drama-killing sound effects. This is essentially the same show with a classier cast and issue-oriented cases (mostly.) Shatner is great as Denny Crane, but they overplay his shtick shamelessly. James Spader, who seems to be finally underplaying Alan just a little bit, is undeniably great as Alan – but this show – in its last season, never cared enough about these characters to draw a real storyline – it’s just like, bad sitcom ideas with some juicy courtroom drama. Anyway, I’m sure I will watch this season to see what happens – but, if only the producers would just trust the acting and the stories to carry this instead of the Catskills Comedy vibe that infects every episode.
Grade: C +
UPDATE: BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
So – fucking BOSTON LEGAL bounced back the next week with an insanely good story that tackled the voting age, a little girl’s rape and a case against the big pharmaceutical companies – and it was great. They even made some inside jokes about this being their last year (Shatner asked “Can’t we try another time slot?”) but I have to admit – this was a great, gripping episode that definitely showed why Shatner and Spader have walked off with so many Emmys.
Grade: B +
TaLK TO ME (HBO)
Don Cheadle stars as real-life radio trailblazer Ralph "Petey" Greene, a high-school dropout and charismatic ex-con who leveraged a prison disc jockey gig into a stint at a Washington, D.C., radio station, a television show and an invitation to the White House. Don Cheadle is electrifying in the role, and the first hour of this film, which charts Greene’s ascension from Jail to radio star is fantastic. And then the film takes a completely unexpected turn (at least to me) and becomes less electrifying but very interesting. The supporting cast is stellar, and I personally thought this was going to be some kind of Howard Stern PRIVATE PARTS retread – but it’s completely original and real and highly recommended.
Grade: B
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 3rd episode)
Vince agrees to come to a sweet 16 for an appearance fee and Ari gets into an escalating war with his long time rival agent, Davies. This was the best of the first batch of 5th season eps, and the sweet 16 girl was hilarious and the place that Ari’s war goes was surprising, although – Ari is seen without his car at the end saying “there was a problem” that seemed to get left on the cutting room floor. Still – this was a particularly good episode.
Grade: A -
UPDATE: Next Episdoe.
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 4th episode)
Finally, after all that talk and wish fulfillment of the boys – we are returning to my favorite topic of ENTOURAGE – the art of the deal. This ep, which had Ari and Vince trying to sell SMOKEJUMPERS while E. tried to weasel out of his commitment to Vince’s old agent (I forget her name) – was awesome. Not a huge fan of Giavani Ribisi – but otherwise – these are killer eps.
Grade: A
DON’T FORGET THE LYRICS! (FOX)
The only thing more annoying than the two singing sisters was Wayne Brady himself. I would probably like this show if not for Brady. He’s either the most useless, phoniest guy in Hollywood, or just doing a great impression of it. The two sisters on the show I watched were so unbearable, seriously – did anybody see them? Yet I love the idea of this show. Replace the host and I’d watch it every week. Wayne Brady is to comedy what Adolph Hitler is to comedy.
Grade: C -
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Chef Ramsey had his toughest challenge yet with an incredibly arrogant young chef, and this continues to be one of the best reality shows on TV. Every episode is usually packed with great stuff and Ramsey is a great reality star. Funny, quick witted and real – although I still think the wrong person won last summers HELL’S KITCHEN.
Grade: A
ER (NBC)
ER debuted to their 15th and final season with a frantic and somber tale about Greg Pratt, who’s been on the show for 7 seasons. No spoilers – but this was as harrowing and tense hour as the show has had in a long time.
Grade B +
THE OFFICE ( NBC)
Would do you say about a show that believes itself to be the funniest show on television, but – in actuality – is one of the least funny shows on television?
Grade: C –
WAITRESS (HBO)
I loved this movie. I loved the story, I loved the theme – I especially loved the dialog. The dialog was as good as it gets in a wistful tale like this. At one point, Kerri Russel, who plays the married pregnant lead perfectly (and seems light years away from her FELICITY role,) is having this sort-of platonic relationship with a married man and they talk a lot in these scenes but it’s great talk. Kerri says in a VOICE OVER: “I became addicted to talking to him. And addicted to my words meaning something to someone.” The life observations in this are also real, shrewd and dead-on. At one point, Russel’s oafish husband, played to absolute perfection by Jeremy Sisto, doing yet another totally original take on the asshole, is having sex with her and asks her to talk dirty. She replies “what do you want me to…” and she’s interrupted by him finishing. This is just a great film and I really loved every single second of it. The director and co-star, Adrien Shelley did a superb job with this film, and days before its release she was killed in her apartment by a construction worker she had a beef with. I’m sketchy on the exact details – but – Jesus. In any case, I doubt she’d want the review to focus on her death, but if felt irresponsible not to mention it. Either way, she left behind 3 kids, a husband and a perfect film.
Grade: A+
IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA (FX)
I always thought this show tried way too hard to be funny and endearing. I recently watched a fresh batch of eps and found that I’m still right – except that the show is a bit more funny and endearing than I initially gave it credit for. Either they’ve really improved, or they’re simply more confident now in their storytelling and point of view. Danny Devito, such an 80s sitcom star – is completely reinvented as the wretched father and even though the main cast still tries a bit too hard - it all sort of works much better now and I will be watching and maybe catching up with some previous episodes. I sort of like the audacity of the stories even if I’m not always crazy about the execution.
Grade: B
KIMMEL LIVE! (ABC)
Jimmy had a really funny sketch on the other night – first they showed Matt Damon talking really vaguely about Sarah Palin and how it’s like a bad Disney movie –then they put a faux promo together that – this is impossible to explain – but really funny. Jon Hamm was on the same show and was hilarious with Jimmy.
Grade: A
IN BRUGES (DVD)
A very slow start that builds to a real depth in this look at these 2 hitmen who are laying low In Bruges after they’ve just completed some hit. It’s not at all an issue based film, but rather – it’s rumination on friendship and violence, movie violence – but it does so entertainingly and even wistfully. This is a rather unusual film in which there is nothing I can think of in recent memory that really compares to it. It’s truly unique and original and it will stay with you longer than you suspect. And by the way – Colin Farrell – best role of his career. Rest of the fairly unknown cast is as good – just can’t remember all their names. Highly recommended.
Grade: B +
BILL MAHR (HBO)
Is a great show, but did he really have to call Sarah Palin a bimbo? What is he?
Grade: A
OUTSIDERS INN (CMT)
So fucking ridiculous. So overly and obviously badly scripted. It started out okay – but by now, the 5th episode in, you literally can’t believe what you’re watching and how contrived, set up and god-awful the whole production is. You have these insane incidents that would NEVER happen in real life, then you have the three idiots, Bobby Brown, Maureen McCormick (Marcia Brady) and Carnie Wilson doing testimonials about there “night in jail.” (Because Maureen – in an insultingly scripted scene – was dancing with a cowboy in this empty bar when their central-casting hussies came by to make trouble and Maureen announced “Let’s throw down now!”) Then they got taken to the slammer. So you had Marcia Brady and Carnie Wilson complaining about being in jail because Maureen doesn’t back down from a fight….this is a fucking insult and everyone involved with this show should be arrested.
Grade: F -
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Reminded us why it’s one of the best half hours on Fox with their season premiere, in an episode that had Brian dressed as Snoopy (along with a Woodstock to complete the profane joke that followed,) Brian having sex with a civilian while Stewie proved himself to be more of a freak than ever, and ended with Cleveland (soon to be star of his own series) complaining that having sex with that woman is something he will never forget – she left him a genital wart. Brian and Cleveland looked at each other a long time after Cleveland revealed the information – and then Cleveland said “It hurts.”
Grade: A
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
Another winner – from the 20th season premiere. Ned and Homer became bounty hunters and Marge took to baking for an erotic bakery. While I think they missed about half the jokes re: the bakery – this show, after all these years, is still rock solid.
Grade: A
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
Not so much.
Grade: C -
2008/09/21
THE TWO COREYS take home 9 Emmys!
Just kidding.
GLAM GOD (VH1)
Episode 4. “Low Life in High Heels” Maybe a series high point, this was probably the wildest episode yet as “Kiki” donned his wig and gave the world his “Jackie Blue” – and I sat and watched maybe the most gloriously sleazy nightclub scene in recent memory. Kiki is a very sad, very scary drunk – and he just about broke my heart in this episode which saw him sent off packing as his drinking became truly detrimental to the production. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone drink as much as Kiki – seriously. SERIOUSLY. In other Glam news, Jess Zaino won again, and the DIGITAL COUCH is hoping she walks away with the whole thing. Since Jess is one of my favorite people in the world – this has been obviously a particularly fun series to watch, but she’s really kicking ass in this competition. THE DIGITAL COUCH is really proud of Zaino. I don’t know why my links aren’t getting hot but, much like the horrible new version of FACEBOOK, Blogspot has screwed with the format so much that I can’t even include hot links on my site – great going, boys. Make this thing LESS user friendly – that’ll show us! Anyway – watch GLAM GOD on VH1 on Thursdays at 10 PM. And go here for GLAM GOD extras:
http://www.vh1.com/shows/series/glam_god/?source=globalnav
Grade: A +
SANDBAG'S on MELROSE (www.sandbagss.com – 323 – 932 – 9344)
I just recently got addicted to this great, great sandwich/sub shop on Melrose. They have every great hot and cold sandwich you can imagine made with awesome ingredients and the sandwiches sort of have this great homemade vibe to them. It costs as much or less than a SUBWAY or QUIZNOs – it’s just like – 100 thousand times better than either one of those chains. And – believe it or not – slightly cheaper. And they deliver their sandwiches with a choice of sides (2 extra dollars –the macaroni salad’s a bit soggy, the noodles in peanut sauce is intoxicating, the cole slaw is enhanced by wasabi and is superlative.) In addition to sandwiches they have a few great salads and the requisite chips – but the real bonus is the tiny cookie they give with every sandwich – it’s homemade and really could use a few more chips in that motherfucker – but it’s tasty nonetheless. And the sandwiches are a true gem. I would list my favorites but honestly – I haven’t had a bad one yet. And they deliver with a 15 dollar minimum.
Grade: A +
ENTOURAGE (HBO)
I caught up with the boys in the first 2 episodes of the 5th season. Things have taken an ugly turn for Vince since “Medillon” and Ari and Eric are doing everything they can to restore him to his “Aquaman” heights. Unfortunately, the world has now seen this shitty movie and nobody is making Vince any serious offers. As a viewer, we’ve watched the guys go through one wish fulfillment scenario after another. It seems as if the show is going to let the guys off easy and I won’t be surprised if Vince gets a great job quickly – but the idea of fucking with their money and future is tantalizing – and I hope the direction moves towards letting us see these guys go through some hard times. But the show, as usual, is fun, fast moving and kind of exactly like it’s always been. Drama is insane, Turtle is looking to get laid, E fights with an always agitated Ari (hopefully we won’t get the Ari family drama that plagued seasons 3 and 4.) And Vince remains a great lead, seemingly uncaring about his career but this season with everything on the line, I think there’ll be some new colors to Vince. At least – one could hope.
Grade: B
ADDICTION (A&E)
I haven’t watched this much, but I watched the story of Aya, the gay Mexican bulimic. Wow. Viewers beware – the show is insanely graphic and unflinching. Aya was a great sport and very open. He admitted that his friends used to call him “Gaya” when they found out about his sexuality (which he admitted was actually pretty funny.) Moreover, I’d never really seen the day to day life of a hardcore bulimic. Aya is a handsome funny guy who clearly wants to be loved by everyone – and that void he feels is fed by these insane binges and then the purge – which happens 3 times a day. When he cooks to vomit – he’ll make himself like – 8 pieces of chicken that he admits he doesn’t even taste because the whole meal is really just a ramp up to the comfort of throwing up. He’s done over 50 thousand dollars worth of damage to his teeth, which he claimed is small potatoes to look good. He’s highly educated and intelligent and someone who simply doesn’t seem to have this problem. If you met him on the street you’d probably be jealous of his lifestyle, which is why this series is so great. These episodes, which take on all difrerent kinds of addictions, are heartbreaking, scary and real – and relatable. This show is great – if you have the stomach for it.
Grade: A
I LOVE MONEY (VH1)
How the fuck is this show so successful again? It’s horrible. Oh yeah, it’s also sort of great. If you like watching a truly unlikable characters battle it out and humiliate themselves for money – and of course the hook of this show is that these are all people from previous VH1 shows – then this is your show. I have a love/hate relationship with it – but based on the last couple of eps, I’d say I’m in love. But with serious trepidation.
Grade: B -
WINDY CITY HEAT (DVD)
I watched this Saturday night with a friend who had never seen it. It’s been a while since I’d seen this and I checked out the DVD version for once instead of the Comedy Central dvd that I’ve had for a couple of years. So it might have been a couple of years since I’ve seen this. First, I want to note that the version I saw last night had scenes I had never seen before, so I guess they edited in an extra 5 minutes or so to the movie – all of which I loved as Perry explains his ingenius technique for remembering lines. In case I haven’t said it lately, this is probably one of the funniest movies I have ever seen in my life. It’s the real life JOE SCHMO (it’s industry legend that SCHMO completely ripped off that movie – and I believe it.) Perry is a terrible actor who is fooled into thinking that there is a major motion picture being filmed with him as the star. What he doesn’t know is that every single person in the film is on the joke except Perry. This film is a blessing of unbelievable people – great editing and a truly one of a kind human being named Perry Cavello. The film held up as if it were made yesterday, only every time I watch it I get about 100 jokes I didn’t see the first time. And this is something I’ve seen maybe 100 times. Don Barris is amazing as Perry’s buddy Don and Tony Barbieri (a writer/performer on the Jimmy Kimmel show) is amazing as Mole, and the whole thing is produced by Jimmy Kimmel’s production company, Jackhole – and we can only hope for a sequel, as I’m still not sure that Perry realizes what this film was really about. Kimmel himself shows up for the finale, which includes an award show in Van Nuys featuring the “President of Show Biz.” This is a great, great elaborate prank disguised as a film and the fact that it’s not more well known is a crime. But here at the DIGITAL COUCH, WINDY CITY HEAT receives our very highest praise and recommendation.
Grade: A +
I looked up Perry online – this is from his OWN WEBSITE:
Excellent at Playing Unstable Characters, Both Comedic and Sinister, Excellent at Scaring People.
JEFF ROSS: NO OFFENSE (COMEDY CENTRAL)
Ross absolutely kills in this brilliant set from a New Jersey casino. Try to watch the uncensored version. This is the best stand up set from Comedy Central in a LONG TIME. Ross is lovable and hilarious, never more so than when he thanks the slacker in the front row for wearing “his nicest flip flops” to the show.
Grade: A +
BROOKE KNOWS BEST (VH1)
I don’t know what’s more useless, this show or Brooke herself. Actually – that’s a lie. I kind of like Brooke. She was really game on HOWARD STERN this week – but I don’t really care for her scripted, inane and truly insipid show.
Grade: D
THE SHIELD (FX)
This is a surprise. While I’m interested in the final season of THE SHIELD, it’s simply not great. After 5 hardcore seasons, this seasons plot seems really convoluted and convenient – even for the Shield. While it pays lots of attention to the fans who have followed the show for the whole time (with the possible exception of a not great season 2, this has pretty much been a perfect series) it doesn’t have the edginess and natural controversy of seasons past. I still love Vic and the gang – but this last season is (so far – 3 eps in) a real let down with a been there – done that vibe. The characters have stopped surprising and the non-Vic storylines are particularly boring. And why oh why are we supposed to care so much about Billings??? (Maybe the worst storyline in the entire series.) Here’s hoping this towering cop show which redefined cable television and the limits of commercial taste finds itself again before they go out, hopefully in style.
Grade: C +
BIG BROTHER (CBS)
I forget if I previously reviewed this, but this finale further proved that this was a truly sub-par season.
Grade: C –
SWINGTOWN (CBS)
SWINGTOWN ended it’s fun run over the summer but I just watched the last 2 eps the other night. This was a really good show that had potential for greatness but never really quite got there. Instead of being sort of a searing look at 70s suburbia, it took on the properties of a cheesy soap opera – very fun but nothing I need to see for a second season. And for the record, the main couple had the two strangest looking kids in television. And both of their relationships were so bad and such cheesy writing it really did take its toll on this series. The finale even had the audacity to include a storyline involving the daughter and her lover/teacher and how his best friend might’ve been in an earthquake – I’m like – “Is this REALLY the last one and you’re bothering us with THIS?” Anyway – the finale also had a slash and burn quality that I admired since the show itself seemed to acknowledge they wouldn’t be back, they set up a never to be seen 2nd season that would have had some intrigue – but I didn’t really buy Molly Parker falling for Roger. Anyway – nice job – it’s a shame this series never saw itself to full potential, but this was a fun ride and some of this series was truly groundbreaking.
Grade: B +
CHRIS ANGEL: MINDFREAK (A&E)
What’s so weird about this is I very recently became a Chris Angel fan after catching (by accident) the ep in which he really did walk on water. I will never know how he pulled that off. The next week, they promised that Chris would perform his last dangerous stunt ever – trying to escape from an building about to implode from massive amounts of dynamite. Watching it, I got the sinking feeling that I was watching bullshit. When Chris didn’t make it out of the building, then emerged seconds before the live broadcast went to credits – and you should see the way he emerged. First of all, the building was blown to bits, then you don’t see anything. Yet, everyone seems very calm and collected. Then, out of nowhere and honestly looking like a fucking retard, Angel emerges as if a house just fell on him with this insane lookon his face that’s supposed to read “A building just fell on me!” Not only is this an insult to everyone who was affected by 9/11 (I guess if Chris Angel were in the towers he would've survived easily) I call bullshit, as did anyone else who watched this truly insulting live broadcast. This link just proves it beyond a shadow of a doubt. Again - BLOGSPOT wants to make it really hard to add hot links to these posts - so you'll have to cut and paste this into your browser - but you have to see this.
The Chris Angel Building Implosion completely de-bunked.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hH2utgVAMt0
PRISON BREAK (FOX)
I watched the last batch of eps from last season and thought it was completely re-invented and still pretty fun. T-Bag is a great character, and I’m looking forward to the new season piling up on my DVR. While not quite as vital as the first season or two, this is still a highly imaginative show that has – against all odds – found a way to keep rocking.
Grade: B +
Lastly, how is it possible that Jenifer Hudson is marrying PUNK from I LOVE NY???
GLAM GOD (VH1)
Episode 4. “Low Life in High Heels” Maybe a series high point, this was probably the wildest episode yet as “Kiki” donned his wig and gave the world his “Jackie Blue” – and I sat and watched maybe the most gloriously sleazy nightclub scene in recent memory. Kiki is a very sad, very scary drunk – and he just about broke my heart in this episode which saw him sent off packing as his drinking became truly detrimental to the production. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone drink as much as Kiki – seriously. SERIOUSLY. In other Glam news, Jess Zaino won again, and the DIGITAL COUCH is hoping she walks away with the whole thing. Since Jess is one of my favorite people in the world – this has been obviously a particularly fun series to watch, but she’s really kicking ass in this competition. THE DIGITAL COUCH is really proud of Zaino. I don’t know why my links aren’t getting hot but, much like the horrible new version of FACEBOOK, Blogspot has screwed with the format so much that I can’t even include hot links on my site – great going, boys. Make this thing LESS user friendly – that’ll show us! Anyway – watch GLAM GOD on VH1 on Thursdays at 10 PM. And go here for GLAM GOD extras:
http://www.vh1.com/shows/series/glam_god/?source=globalnav
Grade: A +
SANDBAG'S on MELROSE (www.sandbagss.com – 323 – 932 – 9344)
I just recently got addicted to this great, great sandwich/sub shop on Melrose. They have every great hot and cold sandwich you can imagine made with awesome ingredients and the sandwiches sort of have this great homemade vibe to them. It costs as much or less than a SUBWAY or QUIZNOs – it’s just like – 100 thousand times better than either one of those chains. And – believe it or not – slightly cheaper. And they deliver their sandwiches with a choice of sides (2 extra dollars –the macaroni salad’s a bit soggy, the noodles in peanut sauce is intoxicating, the cole slaw is enhanced by wasabi and is superlative.) In addition to sandwiches they have a few great salads and the requisite chips – but the real bonus is the tiny cookie they give with every sandwich – it’s homemade and really could use a few more chips in that motherfucker – but it’s tasty nonetheless. And the sandwiches are a true gem. I would list my favorites but honestly – I haven’t had a bad one yet. And they deliver with a 15 dollar minimum.
Grade: A +
ENTOURAGE (HBO)
I caught up with the boys in the first 2 episodes of the 5th season. Things have taken an ugly turn for Vince since “Medillon” and Ari and Eric are doing everything they can to restore him to his “Aquaman” heights. Unfortunately, the world has now seen this shitty movie and nobody is making Vince any serious offers. As a viewer, we’ve watched the guys go through one wish fulfillment scenario after another. It seems as if the show is going to let the guys off easy and I won’t be surprised if Vince gets a great job quickly – but the idea of fucking with their money and future is tantalizing – and I hope the direction moves towards letting us see these guys go through some hard times. But the show, as usual, is fun, fast moving and kind of exactly like it’s always been. Drama is insane, Turtle is looking to get laid, E fights with an always agitated Ari (hopefully we won’t get the Ari family drama that plagued seasons 3 and 4.) And Vince remains a great lead, seemingly uncaring about his career but this season with everything on the line, I think there’ll be some new colors to Vince. At least – one could hope.
Grade: B
ADDICTION (A&E)
I haven’t watched this much, but I watched the story of Aya, the gay Mexican bulimic. Wow. Viewers beware – the show is insanely graphic and unflinching. Aya was a great sport and very open. He admitted that his friends used to call him “Gaya” when they found out about his sexuality (which he admitted was actually pretty funny.) Moreover, I’d never really seen the day to day life of a hardcore bulimic. Aya is a handsome funny guy who clearly wants to be loved by everyone – and that void he feels is fed by these insane binges and then the purge – which happens 3 times a day. When he cooks to vomit – he’ll make himself like – 8 pieces of chicken that he admits he doesn’t even taste because the whole meal is really just a ramp up to the comfort of throwing up. He’s done over 50 thousand dollars worth of damage to his teeth, which he claimed is small potatoes to look good. He’s highly educated and intelligent and someone who simply doesn’t seem to have this problem. If you met him on the street you’d probably be jealous of his lifestyle, which is why this series is so great. These episodes, which take on all difrerent kinds of addictions, are heartbreaking, scary and real – and relatable. This show is great – if you have the stomach for it.
Grade: A
I LOVE MONEY (VH1)
How the fuck is this show so successful again? It’s horrible. Oh yeah, it’s also sort of great. If you like watching a truly unlikable characters battle it out and humiliate themselves for money – and of course the hook of this show is that these are all people from previous VH1 shows – then this is your show. I have a love/hate relationship with it – but based on the last couple of eps, I’d say I’m in love. But with serious trepidation.
Grade: B -
WINDY CITY HEAT (DVD)
I watched this Saturday night with a friend who had never seen it. It’s been a while since I’d seen this and I checked out the DVD version for once instead of the Comedy Central dvd that I’ve had for a couple of years. So it might have been a couple of years since I’ve seen this. First, I want to note that the version I saw last night had scenes I had never seen before, so I guess they edited in an extra 5 minutes or so to the movie – all of which I loved as Perry explains his ingenius technique for remembering lines. In case I haven’t said it lately, this is probably one of the funniest movies I have ever seen in my life. It’s the real life JOE SCHMO (it’s industry legend that SCHMO completely ripped off that movie – and I believe it.) Perry is a terrible actor who is fooled into thinking that there is a major motion picture being filmed with him as the star. What he doesn’t know is that every single person in the film is on the joke except Perry. This film is a blessing of unbelievable people – great editing and a truly one of a kind human being named Perry Cavello. The film held up as if it were made yesterday, only every time I watch it I get about 100 jokes I didn’t see the first time. And this is something I’ve seen maybe 100 times. Don Barris is amazing as Perry’s buddy Don and Tony Barbieri (a writer/performer on the Jimmy Kimmel show) is amazing as Mole, and the whole thing is produced by Jimmy Kimmel’s production company, Jackhole – and we can only hope for a sequel, as I’m still not sure that Perry realizes what this film was really about. Kimmel himself shows up for the finale, which includes an award show in Van Nuys featuring the “President of Show Biz.” This is a great, great elaborate prank disguised as a film and the fact that it’s not more well known is a crime. But here at the DIGITAL COUCH, WINDY CITY HEAT receives our very highest praise and recommendation.
Grade: A +
I looked up Perry online – this is from his OWN WEBSITE:
Excellent at Playing Unstable Characters, Both Comedic and Sinister, Excellent at Scaring People.
JEFF ROSS: NO OFFENSE (COMEDY CENTRAL)
Ross absolutely kills in this brilliant set from a New Jersey casino. Try to watch the uncensored version. This is the best stand up set from Comedy Central in a LONG TIME. Ross is lovable and hilarious, never more so than when he thanks the slacker in the front row for wearing “his nicest flip flops” to the show.
Grade: A +
BROOKE KNOWS BEST (VH1)
I don’t know what’s more useless, this show or Brooke herself. Actually – that’s a lie. I kind of like Brooke. She was really game on HOWARD STERN this week – but I don’t really care for her scripted, inane and truly insipid show.
Grade: D
THE SHIELD (FX)
This is a surprise. While I’m interested in the final season of THE SHIELD, it’s simply not great. After 5 hardcore seasons, this seasons plot seems really convoluted and convenient – even for the Shield. While it pays lots of attention to the fans who have followed the show for the whole time (with the possible exception of a not great season 2, this has pretty much been a perfect series) it doesn’t have the edginess and natural controversy of seasons past. I still love Vic and the gang – but this last season is (so far – 3 eps in) a real let down with a been there – done that vibe. The characters have stopped surprising and the non-Vic storylines are particularly boring. And why oh why are we supposed to care so much about Billings??? (Maybe the worst storyline in the entire series.) Here’s hoping this towering cop show which redefined cable television and the limits of commercial taste finds itself again before they go out, hopefully in style.
Grade: C +
BIG BROTHER (CBS)
I forget if I previously reviewed this, but this finale further proved that this was a truly sub-par season.
Grade: C –
SWINGTOWN (CBS)
SWINGTOWN ended it’s fun run over the summer but I just watched the last 2 eps the other night. This was a really good show that had potential for greatness but never really quite got there. Instead of being sort of a searing look at 70s suburbia, it took on the properties of a cheesy soap opera – very fun but nothing I need to see for a second season. And for the record, the main couple had the two strangest looking kids in television. And both of their relationships were so bad and such cheesy writing it really did take its toll on this series. The finale even had the audacity to include a storyline involving the daughter and her lover/teacher and how his best friend might’ve been in an earthquake – I’m like – “Is this REALLY the last one and you’re bothering us with THIS?” Anyway – the finale also had a slash and burn quality that I admired since the show itself seemed to acknowledge they wouldn’t be back, they set up a never to be seen 2nd season that would have had some intrigue – but I didn’t really buy Molly Parker falling for Roger. Anyway – nice job – it’s a shame this series never saw itself to full potential, but this was a fun ride and some of this series was truly groundbreaking.
Grade: B +
CHRIS ANGEL: MINDFREAK (A&E)
What’s so weird about this is I very recently became a Chris Angel fan after catching (by accident) the ep in which he really did walk on water. I will never know how he pulled that off. The next week, they promised that Chris would perform his last dangerous stunt ever – trying to escape from an building about to implode from massive amounts of dynamite. Watching it, I got the sinking feeling that I was watching bullshit. When Chris didn’t make it out of the building, then emerged seconds before the live broadcast went to credits – and you should see the way he emerged. First of all, the building was blown to bits, then you don’t see anything. Yet, everyone seems very calm and collected. Then, out of nowhere and honestly looking like a fucking retard, Angel emerges as if a house just fell on him with this insane lookon his face that’s supposed to read “A building just fell on me!” Not only is this an insult to everyone who was affected by 9/11 (I guess if Chris Angel were in the towers he would've survived easily) I call bullshit, as did anyone else who watched this truly insulting live broadcast. This link just proves it beyond a shadow of a doubt. Again - BLOGSPOT wants to make it really hard to add hot links to these posts - so you'll have to cut and paste this into your browser - but you have to see this.
The Chris Angel Building Implosion completely de-bunked.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hH2utgVAMt0
PRISON BREAK (FOX)
I watched the last batch of eps from last season and thought it was completely re-invented and still pretty fun. T-Bag is a great character, and I’m looking forward to the new season piling up on my DVR. While not quite as vital as the first season or two, this is still a highly imaginative show that has – against all odds – found a way to keep rocking.
Grade: B +
Lastly, how is it possible that Jenifer Hudson is marrying PUNK from I LOVE NY???
2008/09/14
SNL returns, Bob Saget on the hotseat and SWINGTOWN swings!
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (NBC)
The opening sketch with Tina Fey playing Sarah Palin was weird in the sense that for the last few weeks everybody noticed how much Palin resembles Fey, imagined Fey doing the impression – and then it was on TV and it was kind of like – exactly what you had in your head. Like the viewers had written the opening sketch – but it was still kind of funny – though every single sketch that followed bombed huge. Michael Phelps could not have been worse – and SNL’s decision to have the important political season start out with Phelps at the helm reminded me why Seth Myers is their head writer.
Grade: D
GLAM GOD (VH1)
GLAM continues to be one of the more entertaining offerings on VH1. In their 3rd of 8 episodes, this is the one that really took off. The challenge this time around was really fun, and guess who brought home the gold – Jess Zaino! But the real story might’ve been Kiki’s insane drinking and chanting and raging – the man is a drunk, albeit one of the most entertaining ones I’ve ever seen. If you are not watching this show, you are missing one of the finer reality shows of the moment.
Grade: A
THE HEARTBREAK KID (HBO)
I happen to catch this on HBO the other night. Way better than you’ve heard, it takes a huge misstep about half way through and never recovers. This was the summer comedy last year that was to mark the return of Ben Stiller and The Farrely Brothers – but somewhere on this one something went wrong. The first half is legitimately funny. There is a great joke about the new couple and the bathroom that made me laugh out loud but is too raunchy to repeat here. Then the movie takes a really shitty turn and just keeps getting shittier until it unveils one of the shittiest endings ever. But the first half is funny.
Grade: C
Speaking of shit, why did ABC pick the 5 biggest shitheads on TV to host the Emmys when they had other great choices – like, say – the guy that does the late night talk show on their own network, who would’ve been superb?
And speaking of comedy, ROLLING STONE did it’s big COMEDY issue this month. How do you do a comedy issue with people like Dane Cook and Craig Ferguson – not to mention star of the unwatchable vh1 show – Margaret Cho – funny to those only who are stuck in the mid-90s – this issue was ok but really – how do you do the COMEDY issue and not include Howard Stern and Jimmy Kimmel? By the way, Dane Cook talks as if he’s Richard Pryor and knows every in and out of the comedy biz. Dane Cook? I mean – Cook looks like a nice enough guy and he’s pleasant to watch at times – horrifyingly unfunny many other times – his new film BEST FRIEND’S GIRL looks like it just might be the worst thing ever committed to celluloid – but he’s in ROLLING STONE as a comedy EXPERT? The only thing the issue got right was in excluding Jay Leno from almost any talk of comedy – since Jay took over the Tonight Show – he seems to have made a rule about no actual laughs on the show – so I guess that sort of worked out.
One thing that came out of the issue that was really surprising to me – they interviewed the still great David Letterman – who revealed that Johnny Carson – after his retirement, was a sometimes contributor to the Letterman show for many years after Johnny’s “retirement.” The only other shocking thing in this issue was that Billy Crystal actually believes that today – in 2008 – the funniest movie ever made – the funniest film EVER – is…..SOME LIKE IT HOT.
Good night, Billy. You had a great run being relevant, that “mahvalous” shtick in the 80s was awesome - but it seems your wish of being a dotty old comedian with weird ideas about comedy has arrived not a moment too soon. Truly – after that Rolling Stone statement and the bit on the HBO telethon with you doing an old black musician which you recited in some kind of retarded Louie Armstrong dialect, maybe it’s time to admit that it’s over. If you can’t admit it to yourself, watch Mr. Saturday Night (a film you made when you were “hot”) and the answer should be depressingly clear.
Lastly, in this issue I learned that Arsenio Hall is responsible for discovering George Lopez. At least now we know who to blame. Did Arsenio Hall die last year?
Kobe Bryant did a rare talk-show appearance on Kimmel the other night and seems like the weirdest dude in basketball. But watching Uncle Frank use $234 dollars to make a salmon skin and shrimp cocktail sauce pizza was worth the price of admission.
MTV VMAS (MTV)
Brittney Spears turned into a robot. She was so afraid of slipping – instead of being herself – she pretended the last 3 years didn’t happen. It almost worked. What a major fucking weirdo. That host guy – English dude with long hair – can’t think of his name - maybe he’s funny otherwise – but he particularly sucked. Anyway – I ended up tuning out pretty quickly.
THE ROAST OF BOB SAGET (COMEDY CENTRAL)
A mixed bag but largely successful. My individual reviews: Greg Giraldo was funny, Chloris Leachman was sort of funny in a “I can’t believe it’s Chloris Leachman saying that” way, Jon Lovitz was horrible, Jeffrey Ross killed, Norm McDonald was brilliant in a widely misunderstood bit, Susie Essman was doing jokes from the 70s that were old in the 50s, Brian Posehn was really funny, Jeff Garland (last minute stand-in for a Heroin Overdosing Artie Lange) was truly God-awful. Garland’s bit and delivery was one of the very worst pieces of comedy I’ve ever witnessed. Jim Norton was shockingly funny. Probably the best he ever did at a roast. John Stamos was a surprisingly decent MC – game and well-written. Gilbert Gottfried killed in ways that most comedians would die for. Overall, a pretty great night for everyone except Artie Lange.
Grade: A -
THE CHO SHOW (VH1)
I watched the episode where Cho and her gang went “off the grid.” This is the worst fucking half hour on TV. Not only that, it completely throws off any goodwill you might’ve once had for Cho. Her and her posse are pathetic and unfunny – worse yet – the show seems really badly scripted. With the exception of Cho’s occasional wit which somehow shines through here and again– this is the absolute pits.
Grade: D -
HOWARD TV – FRED’S WAXING (HOWARD TV)
Unlike the ARTIE HEROIN CONFESSION last week, which Howard TV reduced to a measly 40 minutes when on the radio it ran a mighty 2 hours and was one of the most scary/funny/real things EVER. Fred The Elephant Boy (now 50 – hardly a boy) was one of those instances where the TV segment was light years better and funnier than the radio segment. Fred made a bet with Howard that he could answer any question regarding the WWE (formerly the WWWF, the WWF – now the WWE) – but when Fred got one of these wrestling questions wrong, he had to undergo serious genital waxing. The waxing was shown in shocking graphic detail – there are disturbing images of The Elephant Boy that I will never forget – but this was probably one of the funniest segments I’d ever heard, and Fred’s sense of humor about the whole thing made the segment somehow a lot more lighthearted than you’d think male-genital-waxing might be. I also learned that in waxing, there is actually a spot called the “anus anus.” This is NOTHING you ever want waxed. Trust me on this one.
Grade: A
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES: LAST YEAR REVISITED (FOX)
Chef Gordon Ramsey went back and visited nearly every restaurant from his first season and shockingly –they are all in great shape since Gordon fixed their menus and kitchens. Absent were quite a few restaurants and one has to wonder if its because they were not success stories and didn’t want to participate. The fact that every single place remained successful was heartwarming but didn’t’ make for the most interesting TV.
Grade: B -
UPDATE: KITCHEN NIGHTMARES – SEASON PREMIERE (FOX)
So Gordon Ramsey came into this little mom and pop diner, mixed it up with a much surlier than expected diner owner, flipped out when he found out the chef was this woman who was a waitress who didn’t even want to be there – and yet – once again, Ramsey was able to transform the restaurant into that small town’s first gastropub (a phrase used a lot in NYC – gastropub means a pub for any kind of patron) and of course – he succeeded wildly. I really like this show and find every episode sort of fascinating in its own way. This edition was no exception. If you are really curious about the ins and outs of the food business, there is no better, entertaining show to watch than KITCHEN NIGHTMARES.
Grade: A
BIG BROTHER (CBS)
After the last strike-season’s batch of episodes, this one feels like a bad re-do. I know a lot of readers of this blog like this season’s edition – but I think the casting this year just wasn’t up to par. It’s a really boring, predictable, unlikable crew. Frankly, I was hoping for a Jerry win – just because it would be interesting to see a 75 year old win the whole thing – but this guy Memphis? He’s a bore. Maybe the most boring man ever to be on a reality show. I think of his face and I fall asleep.
Grade: C -
SWINGTOWN (CBS)
These had been sitting on my DVR for quite a while. I watched the first 8 or so over the last few weeks and have about 4 to go. The show has been cancelled already so this is more a post-mortem than a real review. The brief history of this show is that it was developed for SHOWTIME – they rejected it and it ended up on corporate partner CBS. Only they had to do the much less frank version of this tale of the swinging 70s. Grant Show plays the husband in an open marriage (he’s shockingly good and makes you forget his entire run on MELROSE PLACE.) Show is revelatory in this role as the airline pilot wife-swapping husband. His wife, played by Molly Parker, is the perfect sexy counterpoint to Show. She really has that 70s vibe about her. And they actually pull off appearing like a real 70s couple. Their new neighbors are straight-laced until they meet Show and Parker and do some partner-swapping in the pilot (a move which has not been repeated since the pilot) and their REALLY square neighbors from across town are pretty funny as the couple who can’t really figure out what’s going on. There are some other “forbidden love” stories on display here – one of the daughters is having a passionate affair with a teacher – that feels forced and dated. The juice here is in the swapping couples and their soap-opera like lives. Frankly, there’s nothing really that wild going on here in this CBS version – however – it IS racy for a network show – and – the cast is game and uniformly excellent. Whoever plays “Janet” is brilliant, sorry I don’t know her name – and I will miss this key party when it ends.
Grade: B +
The opening sketch with Tina Fey playing Sarah Palin was weird in the sense that for the last few weeks everybody noticed how much Palin resembles Fey, imagined Fey doing the impression – and then it was on TV and it was kind of like – exactly what you had in your head. Like the viewers had written the opening sketch – but it was still kind of funny – though every single sketch that followed bombed huge. Michael Phelps could not have been worse – and SNL’s decision to have the important political season start out with Phelps at the helm reminded me why Seth Myers is their head writer.
Grade: D
GLAM GOD (VH1)
GLAM continues to be one of the more entertaining offerings on VH1. In their 3rd of 8 episodes, this is the one that really took off. The challenge this time around was really fun, and guess who brought home the gold – Jess Zaino! But the real story might’ve been Kiki’s insane drinking and chanting and raging – the man is a drunk, albeit one of the most entertaining ones I’ve ever seen. If you are not watching this show, you are missing one of the finer reality shows of the moment.
Grade: A
THE HEARTBREAK KID (HBO)
I happen to catch this on HBO the other night. Way better than you’ve heard, it takes a huge misstep about half way through and never recovers. This was the summer comedy last year that was to mark the return of Ben Stiller and The Farrely Brothers – but somewhere on this one something went wrong. The first half is legitimately funny. There is a great joke about the new couple and the bathroom that made me laugh out loud but is too raunchy to repeat here. Then the movie takes a really shitty turn and just keeps getting shittier until it unveils one of the shittiest endings ever. But the first half is funny.
Grade: C
Speaking of shit, why did ABC pick the 5 biggest shitheads on TV to host the Emmys when they had other great choices – like, say – the guy that does the late night talk show on their own network, who would’ve been superb?
And speaking of comedy, ROLLING STONE did it’s big COMEDY issue this month. How do you do a comedy issue with people like Dane Cook and Craig Ferguson – not to mention star of the unwatchable vh1 show – Margaret Cho – funny to those only who are stuck in the mid-90s – this issue was ok but really – how do you do the COMEDY issue and not include Howard Stern and Jimmy Kimmel? By the way, Dane Cook talks as if he’s Richard Pryor and knows every in and out of the comedy biz. Dane Cook? I mean – Cook looks like a nice enough guy and he’s pleasant to watch at times – horrifyingly unfunny many other times – his new film BEST FRIEND’S GIRL looks like it just might be the worst thing ever committed to celluloid – but he’s in ROLLING STONE as a comedy EXPERT? The only thing the issue got right was in excluding Jay Leno from almost any talk of comedy – since Jay took over the Tonight Show – he seems to have made a rule about no actual laughs on the show – so I guess that sort of worked out.
One thing that came out of the issue that was really surprising to me – they interviewed the still great David Letterman – who revealed that Johnny Carson – after his retirement, was a sometimes contributor to the Letterman show for many years after Johnny’s “retirement.” The only other shocking thing in this issue was that Billy Crystal actually believes that today – in 2008 – the funniest movie ever made – the funniest film EVER – is…..SOME LIKE IT HOT.
Good night, Billy. You had a great run being relevant, that “mahvalous” shtick in the 80s was awesome - but it seems your wish of being a dotty old comedian with weird ideas about comedy has arrived not a moment too soon. Truly – after that Rolling Stone statement and the bit on the HBO telethon with you doing an old black musician which you recited in some kind of retarded Louie Armstrong dialect, maybe it’s time to admit that it’s over. If you can’t admit it to yourself, watch Mr. Saturday Night (a film you made when you were “hot”) and the answer should be depressingly clear.
Lastly, in this issue I learned that Arsenio Hall is responsible for discovering George Lopez. At least now we know who to blame. Did Arsenio Hall die last year?
Kobe Bryant did a rare talk-show appearance on Kimmel the other night and seems like the weirdest dude in basketball. But watching Uncle Frank use $234 dollars to make a salmon skin and shrimp cocktail sauce pizza was worth the price of admission.
MTV VMAS (MTV)
Brittney Spears turned into a robot. She was so afraid of slipping – instead of being herself – she pretended the last 3 years didn’t happen. It almost worked. What a major fucking weirdo. That host guy – English dude with long hair – can’t think of his name - maybe he’s funny otherwise – but he particularly sucked. Anyway – I ended up tuning out pretty quickly.
THE ROAST OF BOB SAGET (COMEDY CENTRAL)
A mixed bag but largely successful. My individual reviews: Greg Giraldo was funny, Chloris Leachman was sort of funny in a “I can’t believe it’s Chloris Leachman saying that” way, Jon Lovitz was horrible, Jeffrey Ross killed, Norm McDonald was brilliant in a widely misunderstood bit, Susie Essman was doing jokes from the 70s that were old in the 50s, Brian Posehn was really funny, Jeff Garland (last minute stand-in for a Heroin Overdosing Artie Lange) was truly God-awful. Garland’s bit and delivery was one of the very worst pieces of comedy I’ve ever witnessed. Jim Norton was shockingly funny. Probably the best he ever did at a roast. John Stamos was a surprisingly decent MC – game and well-written. Gilbert Gottfried killed in ways that most comedians would die for. Overall, a pretty great night for everyone except Artie Lange.
Grade: A -
THE CHO SHOW (VH1)
I watched the episode where Cho and her gang went “off the grid.” This is the worst fucking half hour on TV. Not only that, it completely throws off any goodwill you might’ve once had for Cho. Her and her posse are pathetic and unfunny – worse yet – the show seems really badly scripted. With the exception of Cho’s occasional wit which somehow shines through here and again– this is the absolute pits.
Grade: D -
HOWARD TV – FRED’S WAXING (HOWARD TV)
Unlike the ARTIE HEROIN CONFESSION last week, which Howard TV reduced to a measly 40 minutes when on the radio it ran a mighty 2 hours and was one of the most scary/funny/real things EVER. Fred The Elephant Boy (now 50 – hardly a boy) was one of those instances where the TV segment was light years better and funnier than the radio segment. Fred made a bet with Howard that he could answer any question regarding the WWE (formerly the WWWF, the WWF – now the WWE) – but when Fred got one of these wrestling questions wrong, he had to undergo serious genital waxing. The waxing was shown in shocking graphic detail – there are disturbing images of The Elephant Boy that I will never forget – but this was probably one of the funniest segments I’d ever heard, and Fred’s sense of humor about the whole thing made the segment somehow a lot more lighthearted than you’d think male-genital-waxing might be. I also learned that in waxing, there is actually a spot called the “anus anus.” This is NOTHING you ever want waxed. Trust me on this one.
Grade: A
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES: LAST YEAR REVISITED (FOX)
Chef Gordon Ramsey went back and visited nearly every restaurant from his first season and shockingly –they are all in great shape since Gordon fixed their menus and kitchens. Absent were quite a few restaurants and one has to wonder if its because they were not success stories and didn’t want to participate. The fact that every single place remained successful was heartwarming but didn’t’ make for the most interesting TV.
Grade: B -
UPDATE: KITCHEN NIGHTMARES – SEASON PREMIERE (FOX)
So Gordon Ramsey came into this little mom and pop diner, mixed it up with a much surlier than expected diner owner, flipped out when he found out the chef was this woman who was a waitress who didn’t even want to be there – and yet – once again, Ramsey was able to transform the restaurant into that small town’s first gastropub (a phrase used a lot in NYC – gastropub means a pub for any kind of patron) and of course – he succeeded wildly. I really like this show and find every episode sort of fascinating in its own way. This edition was no exception. If you are really curious about the ins and outs of the food business, there is no better, entertaining show to watch than KITCHEN NIGHTMARES.
Grade: A
BIG BROTHER (CBS)
After the last strike-season’s batch of episodes, this one feels like a bad re-do. I know a lot of readers of this blog like this season’s edition – but I think the casting this year just wasn’t up to par. It’s a really boring, predictable, unlikable crew. Frankly, I was hoping for a Jerry win – just because it would be interesting to see a 75 year old win the whole thing – but this guy Memphis? He’s a bore. Maybe the most boring man ever to be on a reality show. I think of his face and I fall asleep.
Grade: C -
SWINGTOWN (CBS)
These had been sitting on my DVR for quite a while. I watched the first 8 or so over the last few weeks and have about 4 to go. The show has been cancelled already so this is more a post-mortem than a real review. The brief history of this show is that it was developed for SHOWTIME – they rejected it and it ended up on corporate partner CBS. Only they had to do the much less frank version of this tale of the swinging 70s. Grant Show plays the husband in an open marriage (he’s shockingly good and makes you forget his entire run on MELROSE PLACE.) Show is revelatory in this role as the airline pilot wife-swapping husband. His wife, played by Molly Parker, is the perfect sexy counterpoint to Show. She really has that 70s vibe about her. And they actually pull off appearing like a real 70s couple. Their new neighbors are straight-laced until they meet Show and Parker and do some partner-swapping in the pilot (a move which has not been repeated since the pilot) and their REALLY square neighbors from across town are pretty funny as the couple who can’t really figure out what’s going on. There are some other “forbidden love” stories on display here – one of the daughters is having a passionate affair with a teacher – that feels forced and dated. The juice here is in the swapping couples and their soap-opera like lives. Frankly, there’s nothing really that wild going on here in this CBS version – however – it IS racy for a network show – and – the cast is game and uniformly excellent. Whoever plays “Janet” is brilliant, sorry I don’t know her name – and I will miss this key party when it ends.
Grade: B +
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