Jimmy Kimmel killed on a very entertaining HOLLYWOOD SALUTES MATT DAMON.
HOUSE, MD (Fox) (Season Finale)
Best. Season Finale. Ever.
Huddy!
HIGH LIFE (DVD)
I've never even heard of this movie but ended up watching it last week. Timothy Olyphant stars in this C-grade heist movie elevated mightily by Olyphant's performance as a junkie thief.
Grade: C +
TWO BROTHERS (DVD)
If you haven't seen this film about two tigers seperated at birth, it's a gem.
Grade: A
BUBBA THE LOVE SPONGE: RAW & UNCUT Vol. 1 (DVD)
Sort of the southern-fried version of Stern, without Howard's wit or charm. Just an upped anti on grossness. Kind of like a slightly dirtier Jack-Ass. This is some of his "best" bits from his radio show. Some of it is funny, some tedious, and most too racy to describe. I like Bubba, but I only have room in my heart for one radio guy.
Grade: B -
UNAMI BURGER (La Brea Avenue)
Best burger I have ever had. It's about 8 bucks a burger and about as good as it gets. I'll go so far to say that in a lot of ways, it redefines what you want in a hamburger. The menu has 100 burgers listed, but I would go for the original.
Grade: A
24 (Fox) Season Finale
I love 24. Completely. They've had some off seasons, but this one caught fire once they decided it was the last network run. From the time of Hassan's death, to the shooting at Jack's apt., to Jack's IRON MAN suit and abduction of the ex-president brilliantly played by Gregory Itzkin, this has been an insanely tense and exciting season. Despite the Dana insanity and some despite Freddie Prinze Jr.'s bad New York accent. Michael Madson did a great turn guest-starring, and this thing was on fire right up until...the final hour. Sorry, no spoilers but taking your man out of mostly all the action right at the top and pivoting the final hour on Cherry Jones' (who was superb) President...didn't feel right. It was frustrating to not have Jack driving the final hour. And the last few seconds was as cheesy as it gets. That said, the conversation with both the President and Chloe were great and cathartic, and this was one of the most kick-ass shows to ever be on television. It will be missed.
Final season grade: B +
Overal grade: A
AMERCAN IDOL (Season Finale) Fox
I could care less about this season's Idols. Really. But the final episodes had Simon leaving and presented Paula Abdul in a return visit to the show. She looked great and her taped bit was heartfelt. But that live performance - what a fucking doozy. Look it up on YouTube under "awkward." Boy can she not speak. And the Peter Cetera-less Chicago segment, oh well. Simon will be missed and I suspect I will migrate to the new show, as the idea of Randy and Ellen leaves me cold. Ellen by the way, was fucking horrible.
DAMAGES (F/X)
I never reviewed the finale, but this was a top-notch season and a great, if really overstuffed finale. I'm glad that they found a way to fund a 4th season.
Grade: A
DOWN IN THE VALLEY (DVD)
Some unwatchable mess about some porn thing in the valley. Yuck.
Grade: F
2010/05/28
2010/05/24
The end of LOST! (MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD) Season Finale of CELEB APPRENTICE (Winner revealed in review)
LOST (ABC) (Final Episode)
I don't have much to say. On the ho-hum side. I was expecting and hoping for something more. The show seems to have satisfied some viewers and really aliented another batch. I'm somewhere in between. The 2 1/2 hour finale didn't really bother with most of the nagging questions posted by long time Lost addicts, like the Dharma Initiative, why the women were losing their babies, etc. Instead focusing on a silly fight between the Locke Monster and Jack. I guess I was okay with the sideways world being a sort of purgatory, but the episode actually begged more questions than it answered. Was the island real at all? Was the entire thing a dream? Or just the sideways world part? Is Ben choosing to be a ghost the rest of his life? I mean - I'm not kidding. There are literally hundreds of questions I have, but I'm sure they're all explainable. Did this have an emotionally satisfying ending? I guess it did. The Sopranos might've left a lot of loose ends, but for the most part, you knew where the central relationships stood. This was like...I don't know. I had settled in for a fantastic night of mind-bending television and thought this was one of the weaker episodes in a way than many I'd seen before it. It relied so heavily on the super-natural that I'm not sure I quite connected with it. I am a TV geek and sure I could do 9 pages on this, but the finale left me so cold, I think I'm just kind of over it.
Grade: I have no idea. I don't know what to make of it. I liked the series so much for the most part, I guess in time I might have a different take on the finale. For now, I'm kind of frustrated with it. I suppose in some ways it makes sense even though the show broke most of the rules it had set up itself....and the last shots suggested that there was no Island life, yet someone said that you saw the shelters they had built....so, again. I guess my grade is just a sigh and a shrug.
That said, I loved a lot of what I saw these last few seasons, and I think sometimes the momementum and forward motion of a show is far better than its conclusion. At no point would I suggest this was bad like the Seinfeld finale (the worst of all time perhaps) but this was more of a big fat mediocre disappointment. I keep saying I'm done and writing more, because I think this one of those debates best left in cyberspace to the real Lost-heads. For me, as someone who has seen every episode, I was hoping for something that moved me and blew my mind, I didn't get that here, but there was some closure and the dog lived. So I guess...I'm just going to stop. I really don't know what to say. I just know this, great final episodes make you re-evaluate a series and want to go back and watch the whole thing again. The Sopranos did that. Cheers did that. Prison Break did such a good finale that it redeemed any negativity about the final season. That Lost would enter that group of fine endings seemed a foregone conclusion.
It's funny, the other night when Evangaline Lilly went on Letterman the other night, Letterman said the only ending that would make him happy would be one in which the whole thing was declared a dream. An appalled Lilly (who also announced she doesn't watch tv - what an intellectual!) said "That is the least imaginative thing I've ever heard." Was she trying to send a message to her producers, or was she watching a different show?
Either way, Lost provided us with years of good television, and some of the hours were ridiculously good. I just think the final batch of episodes being a match between a smoke monster (who you can apparently kill by throwing him on a rock) and Jack, because they were fighting over...a light in the island under the rocks I think....I don't know.
Moving on.
UPDATE: I wrote that last night in the heat of dissapointment. Now that the ending has sunk in somewhat, I'm much more forgiving and started looking at Lost as a whole series instead of one episode.
That said, Lost really was a breathrough network show. There may never be anything again like it, and while I might not have liked all the choices they ultimately made, I still think the ambition here is not to be ignored and will probably never be duplicated. The truth was, I think we all wanted an emotional ending and not something caught up in answering every question posed along the way. I'm not sure I'm really...moved by the answer, and I have some burning questions I would like answered that I felt could've been resolved last night, but I wonder with this final piece of the puzzle how Lost will eventually settle in my mind.
I'm withholding a final grade till I get a chance to see it again.
THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (ABC)
This was a pretty good year. We all know who won and if you don't, you can look it up. Sufice it to say that I thought while the wrong person won, it was clearly a case of the popular thing happening. It seems like the audience wrote the ending. And what the fuck was Cyndi Lauper singing? Could she have picked anything more obscure? Brett was fantastic on the show, but I don't think Holly Robinson could've been beat by anything but Brett becoming a national hero, which is exactly what happened. It was no accident that Snapple gave both winners the exact amount of money.
Grade: B
I don't have much to say. On the ho-hum side. I was expecting and hoping for something more. The show seems to have satisfied some viewers and really aliented another batch. I'm somewhere in between. The 2 1/2 hour finale didn't really bother with most of the nagging questions posted by long time Lost addicts, like the Dharma Initiative, why the women were losing their babies, etc. Instead focusing on a silly fight between the Locke Monster and Jack. I guess I was okay with the sideways world being a sort of purgatory, but the episode actually begged more questions than it answered. Was the island real at all? Was the entire thing a dream? Or just the sideways world part? Is Ben choosing to be a ghost the rest of his life? I mean - I'm not kidding. There are literally hundreds of questions I have, but I'm sure they're all explainable. Did this have an emotionally satisfying ending? I guess it did. The Sopranos might've left a lot of loose ends, but for the most part, you knew where the central relationships stood. This was like...I don't know. I had settled in for a fantastic night of mind-bending television and thought this was one of the weaker episodes in a way than many I'd seen before it. It relied so heavily on the super-natural that I'm not sure I quite connected with it. I am a TV geek and sure I could do 9 pages on this, but the finale left me so cold, I think I'm just kind of over it.
Grade: I have no idea. I don't know what to make of it. I liked the series so much for the most part, I guess in time I might have a different take on the finale. For now, I'm kind of frustrated with it. I suppose in some ways it makes sense even though the show broke most of the rules it had set up itself....and the last shots suggested that there was no Island life, yet someone said that you saw the shelters they had built....so, again. I guess my grade is just a sigh and a shrug.
That said, I loved a lot of what I saw these last few seasons, and I think sometimes the momementum and forward motion of a show is far better than its conclusion. At no point would I suggest this was bad like the Seinfeld finale (the worst of all time perhaps) but this was more of a big fat mediocre disappointment. I keep saying I'm done and writing more, because I think this one of those debates best left in cyberspace to the real Lost-heads. For me, as someone who has seen every episode, I was hoping for something that moved me and blew my mind, I didn't get that here, but there was some closure and the dog lived. So I guess...I'm just going to stop. I really don't know what to say. I just know this, great final episodes make you re-evaluate a series and want to go back and watch the whole thing again. The Sopranos did that. Cheers did that. Prison Break did such a good finale that it redeemed any negativity about the final season. That Lost would enter that group of fine endings seemed a foregone conclusion.
It's funny, the other night when Evangaline Lilly went on Letterman the other night, Letterman said the only ending that would make him happy would be one in which the whole thing was declared a dream. An appalled Lilly (who also announced she doesn't watch tv - what an intellectual!) said "That is the least imaginative thing I've ever heard." Was she trying to send a message to her producers, or was she watching a different show?
Either way, Lost provided us with years of good television, and some of the hours were ridiculously good. I just think the final batch of episodes being a match between a smoke monster (who you can apparently kill by throwing him on a rock) and Jack, because they were fighting over...a light in the island under the rocks I think....I don't know.
Moving on.
UPDATE: I wrote that last night in the heat of dissapointment. Now that the ending has sunk in somewhat, I'm much more forgiving and started looking at Lost as a whole series instead of one episode.
That said, Lost really was a breathrough network show. There may never be anything again like it, and while I might not have liked all the choices they ultimately made, I still think the ambition here is not to be ignored and will probably never be duplicated. The truth was, I think we all wanted an emotional ending and not something caught up in answering every question posed along the way. I'm not sure I'm really...moved by the answer, and I have some burning questions I would like answered that I felt could've been resolved last night, but I wonder with this final piece of the puzzle how Lost will eventually settle in my mind.
I'm withholding a final grade till I get a chance to see it again.
THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (ABC)
This was a pretty good year. We all know who won and if you don't, you can look it up. Sufice it to say that I thought while the wrong person won, it was clearly a case of the popular thing happening. It seems like the audience wrote the ending. And what the fuck was Cyndi Lauper singing? Could she have picked anything more obscure? Brett was fantastic on the show, but I don't think Holly Robinson could've been beat by anything but Brett becoming a national hero, which is exactly what happened. It was no accident that Snapple gave both winners the exact amount of money.
Grade: B
2010/05/18
Kick ass! 24: The end is coming.
KICK ASS (In Theaters)
Part superhero mythos, part Superbad, and lots of Tarantino inspired "Kill Bill" mayhem, this is a truly super-violent display of both tone and film-making bravado. The hero of this, Kick-Ass, is an average teenager who just wants to do something amazing. There are so many spoilers here that I don't want to give too much away. I'll leave it at this - the actors here are top notch. Particularly the kids. And especially that little girl who plays Nicholas Cage's (Cage is excellent here) daughter. I kind of loved this movie, even though while it presented its superheroes in somewhat realistic light, the bad guys and scenarios were a lot more by-the-book than you'd expect. I kind of need to see a sequel. (Although I don't quite know if this made enough money to warrant one.)
Grade: B +
24 (Fox)
With all the hype surrounding the LOST finale, not enough attention has been paid to the closing out of one of our greatest modern action hours, 24. No spoilers here, but the last 4 or 5 eps have been truly dazzling and is serving as a masterfully satisfying finish to what is sure to become a great film franchise. Jack has never been more ruthless and haunted. And the twists keep piling up. I fucking love it.
Grade: A
FRAT HOUSE (HBO DOC)
This is a banned docu that I got a chance to see (a friend had the original tape from HBO - I think it aired once.) Let me save you all the trouble. It is good filmmaking. Very good. I just don't think you're going to see anything much here that will surprise you. People are aware of just how crazy pledging a frat can be, and there is nothing here that calls for public outcry. Still pretty fun if you haven't seen it, and if you have no idea what goes on in these pledge weeks, by all means seek this out. But honestly, this was just okay.
Grade: C
DO I DRINK TOO MUCH (BBC DOC)
A fascinating docu by a guy who always had seen himself as a "regular" drinker. He starts to go to doctors to see what the alcohol is doing to him. He takes part in a variety of tests administered in offices to see what effects alcohol have on him. This is probably easy to find on the internet, and if you ever wondered about the effects of alcohol, seek this out.
Grade: B
The Breathing Technique (A Magazine)
Sorry. Can't remember the magazine, but I read about this technique and actually tried it - and it actually worked! The next time you're feeling stressed out and anxiety is over-taking you, try this: put your thumb lightly under your right nostril, and then breathe in through your left nostril deeply 30 times. You may not make it all the way to 30, but think about the process while it's happening and I swear, there are all kinds of reasons why this happens, but I'mn not a doctor and I don't even remember where I read about this. But - this will actually give you a physiological change that will mellow you the fuck out!
Grade: A
30 ROCK (NBC)
Jack choosing between Julianne Moore and Avery is ridiculous. Julianne Moore is one of my all time favorite actresses. But this is not a good role for her, the accent is truly beyond cheesy or cute, and Avery is every man's fantasy and the actress playing her is hilarious. So give us a break. And I still really like this show, even if its gotten too surreal for its own good.
WHITE POWER (DOCUMENTARY)
Another BBC docu on a subject and frankly, all these docs on white power are usually about the same. Very grim, depressing and rather boring subject matter. The skinheads or nazis or whoever is talking is usually really fucking super size dumb. We get it. It's not good to be a nazi. Point taken.
Grade: D
PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (DVD)
I recently saw this again on DVD just to catch the "alternate endings." There are no extras here. Just a chilling film perfect for a rental and of the 3 existing endings (one which is not on the dvd) I have no idea which I prefer. I think I wish they never showed the alternate endings so I can just have one idea of what happened. If you see this, stick with one or the other, but looking at the other endings exposes the whole docu feel of this subtle creep fest.
Grade: B +
PORT OF CALL: THE BAD LT. (DVD)
This was one of my favorites of the year. I just looked at the DVD and am sad to report there are NO extras whatsoever. Still a great movie.
Grade: A
Part superhero mythos, part Superbad, and lots of Tarantino inspired "Kill Bill" mayhem, this is a truly super-violent display of both tone and film-making bravado. The hero of this, Kick-Ass, is an average teenager who just wants to do something amazing. There are so many spoilers here that I don't want to give too much away. I'll leave it at this - the actors here are top notch. Particularly the kids. And especially that little girl who plays Nicholas Cage's (Cage is excellent here) daughter. I kind of loved this movie, even though while it presented its superheroes in somewhat realistic light, the bad guys and scenarios were a lot more by-the-book than you'd expect. I kind of need to see a sequel. (Although I don't quite know if this made enough money to warrant one.)
Grade: B +
24 (Fox)
With all the hype surrounding the LOST finale, not enough attention has been paid to the closing out of one of our greatest modern action hours, 24. No spoilers here, but the last 4 or 5 eps have been truly dazzling and is serving as a masterfully satisfying finish to what is sure to become a great film franchise. Jack has never been more ruthless and haunted. And the twists keep piling up. I fucking love it.
Grade: A
FRAT HOUSE (HBO DOC)
This is a banned docu that I got a chance to see (a friend had the original tape from HBO - I think it aired once.) Let me save you all the trouble. It is good filmmaking. Very good. I just don't think you're going to see anything much here that will surprise you. People are aware of just how crazy pledging a frat can be, and there is nothing here that calls for public outcry. Still pretty fun if you haven't seen it, and if you have no idea what goes on in these pledge weeks, by all means seek this out. But honestly, this was just okay.
Grade: C
DO I DRINK TOO MUCH (BBC DOC)
A fascinating docu by a guy who always had seen himself as a "regular" drinker. He starts to go to doctors to see what the alcohol is doing to him. He takes part in a variety of tests administered in offices to see what effects alcohol have on him. This is probably easy to find on the internet, and if you ever wondered about the effects of alcohol, seek this out.
Grade: B
The Breathing Technique (A Magazine)
Sorry. Can't remember the magazine, but I read about this technique and actually tried it - and it actually worked! The next time you're feeling stressed out and anxiety is over-taking you, try this: put your thumb lightly under your right nostril, and then breathe in through your left nostril deeply 30 times. You may not make it all the way to 30, but think about the process while it's happening and I swear, there are all kinds of reasons why this happens, but I'mn not a doctor and I don't even remember where I read about this. But - this will actually give you a physiological change that will mellow you the fuck out!
Grade: A
30 ROCK (NBC)
Jack choosing between Julianne Moore and Avery is ridiculous. Julianne Moore is one of my all time favorite actresses. But this is not a good role for her, the accent is truly beyond cheesy or cute, and Avery is every man's fantasy and the actress playing her is hilarious. So give us a break. And I still really like this show, even if its gotten too surreal for its own good.
WHITE POWER (DOCUMENTARY)
Another BBC docu on a subject and frankly, all these docs on white power are usually about the same. Very grim, depressing and rather boring subject matter. The skinheads or nazis or whoever is talking is usually really fucking super size dumb. We get it. It's not good to be a nazi. Point taken.
Grade: D
PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (DVD)
I recently saw this again on DVD just to catch the "alternate endings." There are no extras here. Just a chilling film perfect for a rental and of the 3 existing endings (one which is not on the dvd) I have no idea which I prefer. I think I wish they never showed the alternate endings so I can just have one idea of what happened. If you see this, stick with one or the other, but looking at the other endings exposes the whole docu feel of this subtle creep fest.
Grade: B +
PORT OF CALL: THE BAD LT. (DVD)
This was one of my favorites of the year. I just looked at the DVD and am sad to report there are NO extras whatsoever. Still a great movie.
Grade: A
2010/05/10
Howard Stern, 24, and Nick Santora (Sopranos, Prison Break) interview.
The Howard Stern Radio Show (Sirius Satellite Radio)
Has been better than ever. Without the sorely missed Artie, Howard has somehow brought the show to another level, and he and Robin are now center stage again. It's certainly a different show from the one he and Artie were doing, but the last few weeks of shows have been as good as they've ever been. The Willie Nelson interview was a standout. The couple that won the million bucks was also superb. If only Fred would talk a bit more and am I the only one that thinks bringing back Jackie Martling would not be the worst thing to ever happen?
Conan O'Brien was kind of great on 60 MINUTES.
FACES (DVD)
I love John Casavetes films. I watched over an hour of this and needed aspirin. I'm sure at the time (the 60s) this made a lot of sense. I didn't get it.
SNL: Betty White (NBC)
Not only did Betty White come through, but SNL came through with one of its better episodes of the season. Bringing back a lot of the past female players was a great idea, but Betty stole the show. Truly.
Grade: A
FAMILY GUY 150th (Fox)
A full half hour of just Stewie and Brian in a locked vault. No cutaways, no gimicks, almost like a 28 minute stage play. That said, some of this was as absolutely profane and vile as the show ever gets. I loved every minute of it. I hope this runs forever. The dance numbers that followed were fun, but that original episode was a real winner.
Grade: A
24 (Fox)
The clock is ticking and with every episode, this gains more and more momentum. What started out as routine as become one of the best seasons of the entire run. This last episode that had Jack deciding on Dana's fate was completely gripping and
suprising. The stuff between Jack and Chloe is superb and I even have to say - Freddie Prinze Jr. is terrific in this. Wow, I said it.
Grade: A
MEET NICK SANTORA:
Nick Santora is a writer who’s written some of this blog’s favorite subjects. His first produced work was the great 4th season Sopranos episode “Watching too much television” which had Tony & Co. subverting HUD funds and ended with Tony giving Assemblyman Zelman a beat down with his belt for having the audacity to date Tony’s ex-girlfriend. It was one of the great 4th season episodes. From there Nick went on to write and produce The Guardian and Law & Order. He also created and executive produced the reality show Beauty & The Geek. He then began on season 1 of one of this blog’s favorite all time shows “Prison Break” and stayed on all the way through all four seasons. He even penned the series swan song “The Final Break.”
Along the way he wrote a National best-selling novel and – oh yeah – he used to be a lawyer in Brooklyn. He’s also a great guy and a friend of mine, so I asked him if he wouldn’t mind me barraging him with questions about his life and career. The following is part one of a four part interview. I caught up with Nick as he was getting lost between the 101 and 405 trying to get to Burbank to do a final mix on the edit of his brand new pilot “Breakout Kings” which he co-created with Prison Break showrunner, Matt Olmstead.
These are heady times for Nick as he awaits word from Fox over his pilot, but despite the stress and anxiety of prepping a pilot, Nick was nice enough to grant these interviews and I thought the shows he worked on were of particular interest to readers of this blog:
NICK SANTORA INTERVIEW PART I
Digital Couch: So, where do we start? Sly Stallone said that before Rocky, he was as low as one could be in this business and you kind of weren’t even in the business when you started. Can you take us through that as best you can?
Nick: I was a lawyer in Manhattan. I worked for Sullivan and Cromwell, one of the most prominent law firms in the world. I was doing so much paper pushing I knew I’d never get into a courtroom and actually litigate, so I switched my place of business, and went from a huge high-end firm to a firm with five lawyers literally located above a pizza place in Brooklyn. I went from dealing with Fortune 500 companies to guys who got hurt on construction sites or slipped and fell in supermarkets.
On the whole, I was a very unhappy person. I was in my mid-20s, I was a lawyer, and by the time I got to my late 20s and saw 30 approaching I was miserable. My wife one morning comes out of the bathroom - she saw me in my boxers and wearing a shirt sitting on the edge of the bed, not getting ready for work – I had been there for an hour. I looked at her and said “it’ll get better.” I was talking about my depression over this existence I had chosen and felt stuck in. My wife answered “it better.”
The truth is, I was in a constant cloud of misery. I was looking down the barrel of 30 more years of practicing law, which is the last thing I wanted to do. I wanted to write.
When I was 6 years old, I wrote a poem and I remember what it felt like to put words together and see how they “fit” in place…to me that was an electrifying experience and to this day I remember that poem:
I Would Like To Be An Orange
By Nick Santora (at 6 years old)
I would like to be an orange.
To have some orange skin.
I would like to be an orange.
To have a lovely grin.
I would like to be an orange.
To be washed and to be dried.
I’m always an orange.
I’m an orange inside.
DC: Nick, that was beautiful.
Nick: Dude, I don’t even like fucking oranges. But it started the idea of putting words together for me. I remember it so well because I still get that feeling everyday where you think you pick the right word…it’s a chemical release in my brain. It feels like you’re high – a natural high. All through my life I would write stories. Back when I was dating my wife and I was broke, (Law School and the loans added up to being poor) I would write novellas for her as gifts. But even though I wanted to write, I felt that I owed my family a law degree since they had put up the funds to get me a very expensive education. In fact, I was the first male Santora to graduate college.
DC: Sounds great, but also sounds like a bit of a burden.
Nick: A heavy burden. Anyway, so now I’m in law for a living, I’m hating it and miserable and I felt like she’d (my wife) eventually catch my misery and leave me because I’m such a sad-sack bastard. And I wouldn’t blame her.
A few days later, I’m in Manhattan and I’m covering a few motions that are being dealt with at he same time. I’m running from courthouse to courthouse. I’m worried that one of my cases would get marked off the court calendar because maybe I’d be late. And while I’m running , this blind woman on the corner says “would somebody help me cross the street?” So, I blow past this woman like she’s a statue, I’m half-way across the street…now this becomes a major moment in my life. Here I am, running around, literally ignoring a disabled person who’s asking for help to get to a job I fucking hate. I wondered what my mom would think if she could see me right now? So go back, grab the woman, and she keeps thanking me and I’m thinking “I have to make a change.”
My wife and I were planning a vacation. I asked her if I could take the last week of my time off and just stay home and try my hand at writing a screenplay. My wife said “Absolutely! Stop talking about it and finally write something.”
So I had that last week off. Took out my wife to dinner that Friday night, went to bed early, then Saturday morning, I sat down at our shitty kitchen table and really shitty computer in our completely shitty apartment, and I started to write. I started Saturday morning and finished around midnight the next Sunday. Nine straight days of writing and I finished a script called “Slip & Fall.”
I was so naïve. I figured I finished a script, now some agent’s going to want to represent me. See, the thing is, in California, everyone has a script. From the taxi driver to the doorman to the executives, everybody has a script. New York is a little different (at the time.) Back then in New York, nobody wrote screenplays at that time. So I went online thinking I’ll search for an agent. I typed in “screenplay agent.” What came up was a screenplay competition that had agents showing up at it.
There was also a film festival portion, and then a competition for unproduced screenplays. The directions on the contest were not to send a script but rather a synopsis. So I did. A few days later I got a call saying they’d like to read the script. But the guy from the contest said “we get hundreds and we only pick about 20 or so.” So I send it and figure that’s the end of it.
A few weeks later, I get a call saying “you’re in the competition.” I’m such a rube, I go out to Nordstroms with my wife and buy a new suit and tie that I couldn’t afford, so I can make a spiffy showing at the competition. I get there, all the other writers are dressed like slobs and now because of my suit, they think I’m an agent. So I’m getting scripts handed to me by writers, I’m getting cornered by writers, but eventually I get to pitch the judges my script and by the time I realized what was going on I realized I had somehow blown this opportunity to mix it up with agents all over this fucking suit I had worn.
A few weeks later, I’m alone in the office working on a motion and my phone rings. It’s the film festival. “Congats, we’re going to announce tomorrow that you won best screenplay.” I say “great, what do I win?” The person says to me “You win your life is going to change.”
Sure enough, I started getting calls from agencies. I signed with United Talent Agency and within a few months they got me a job writing for a show that had a 13 episode script order for a show called AT END OF DAY which was an original series for A&E. I remember the day I was supposed to start writing it. September 11, 2001.
The guy who hired me, the showrunner, Mark Rosner, called and said “you don’t have to worry. I can find someone else. I don’t expect you to finish this script with what’s going on in New York.” My response was “I want to do this more than ever.” The tragedy pointed out that any day could be your last, and I wanted this. The show didn’t get picked up, but that script did two things for me, it showed my agents that I could do the job and got me into the Writer’s Guild.
The showrunner called my agent and said “he did a great job! You should work for this guy.” A few months later I’m still doing law, and the agents call and say I have to take a meeting. I say “I can’t just pick up and take off to LA anytime there’s a possible job.” The agent said “Trust me, you want to take this meeting, and it’s in New York.”
I though a minute and said “It’s not…”
My agent replied “Yes, the meeting is with David Chase. The show is The Sopranos.”
To be continued:
Has been better than ever. Without the sorely missed Artie, Howard has somehow brought the show to another level, and he and Robin are now center stage again. It's certainly a different show from the one he and Artie were doing, but the last few weeks of shows have been as good as they've ever been. The Willie Nelson interview was a standout. The couple that won the million bucks was also superb. If only Fred would talk a bit more and am I the only one that thinks bringing back Jackie Martling would not be the worst thing to ever happen?
Conan O'Brien was kind of great on 60 MINUTES.
FACES (DVD)
I love John Casavetes films. I watched over an hour of this and needed aspirin. I'm sure at the time (the 60s) this made a lot of sense. I didn't get it.
SNL: Betty White (NBC)
Not only did Betty White come through, but SNL came through with one of its better episodes of the season. Bringing back a lot of the past female players was a great idea, but Betty stole the show. Truly.
Grade: A
FAMILY GUY 150th (Fox)
A full half hour of just Stewie and Brian in a locked vault. No cutaways, no gimicks, almost like a 28 minute stage play. That said, some of this was as absolutely profane and vile as the show ever gets. I loved every minute of it. I hope this runs forever. The dance numbers that followed were fun, but that original episode was a real winner.
Grade: A
24 (Fox)
The clock is ticking and with every episode, this gains more and more momentum. What started out as routine as become one of the best seasons of the entire run. This last episode that had Jack deciding on Dana's fate was completely gripping and
suprising. The stuff between Jack and Chloe is superb and I even have to say - Freddie Prinze Jr. is terrific in this. Wow, I said it.
Grade: A
MEET NICK SANTORA:
Nick Santora is a writer who’s written some of this blog’s favorite subjects. His first produced work was the great 4th season Sopranos episode “Watching too much television” which had Tony & Co. subverting HUD funds and ended with Tony giving Assemblyman Zelman a beat down with his belt for having the audacity to date Tony’s ex-girlfriend. It was one of the great 4th season episodes. From there Nick went on to write and produce The Guardian and Law & Order. He also created and executive produced the reality show Beauty & The Geek. He then began on season 1 of one of this blog’s favorite all time shows “Prison Break” and stayed on all the way through all four seasons. He even penned the series swan song “The Final Break.”
Along the way he wrote a National best-selling novel and – oh yeah – he used to be a lawyer in Brooklyn. He’s also a great guy and a friend of mine, so I asked him if he wouldn’t mind me barraging him with questions about his life and career. The following is part one of a four part interview. I caught up with Nick as he was getting lost between the 101 and 405 trying to get to Burbank to do a final mix on the edit of his brand new pilot “Breakout Kings” which he co-created with Prison Break showrunner, Matt Olmstead.
These are heady times for Nick as he awaits word from Fox over his pilot, but despite the stress and anxiety of prepping a pilot, Nick was nice enough to grant these interviews and I thought the shows he worked on were of particular interest to readers of this blog:
NICK SANTORA INTERVIEW PART I
Digital Couch: So, where do we start? Sly Stallone said that before Rocky, he was as low as one could be in this business and you kind of weren’t even in the business when you started. Can you take us through that as best you can?
Nick: I was a lawyer in Manhattan. I worked for Sullivan and Cromwell, one of the most prominent law firms in the world. I was doing so much paper pushing I knew I’d never get into a courtroom and actually litigate, so I switched my place of business, and went from a huge high-end firm to a firm with five lawyers literally located above a pizza place in Brooklyn. I went from dealing with Fortune 500 companies to guys who got hurt on construction sites or slipped and fell in supermarkets.
On the whole, I was a very unhappy person. I was in my mid-20s, I was a lawyer, and by the time I got to my late 20s and saw 30 approaching I was miserable. My wife one morning comes out of the bathroom - she saw me in my boxers and wearing a shirt sitting on the edge of the bed, not getting ready for work – I had been there for an hour. I looked at her and said “it’ll get better.” I was talking about my depression over this existence I had chosen and felt stuck in. My wife answered “it better.”
The truth is, I was in a constant cloud of misery. I was looking down the barrel of 30 more years of practicing law, which is the last thing I wanted to do. I wanted to write.
When I was 6 years old, I wrote a poem and I remember what it felt like to put words together and see how they “fit” in place…to me that was an electrifying experience and to this day I remember that poem:
I Would Like To Be An Orange
By Nick Santora (at 6 years old)
I would like to be an orange.
To have some orange skin.
I would like to be an orange.
To have a lovely grin.
I would like to be an orange.
To be washed and to be dried.
I’m always an orange.
I’m an orange inside.
DC: Nick, that was beautiful.
Nick: Dude, I don’t even like fucking oranges. But it started the idea of putting words together for me. I remember it so well because I still get that feeling everyday where you think you pick the right word…it’s a chemical release in my brain. It feels like you’re high – a natural high. All through my life I would write stories. Back when I was dating my wife and I was broke, (Law School and the loans added up to being poor) I would write novellas for her as gifts. But even though I wanted to write, I felt that I owed my family a law degree since they had put up the funds to get me a very expensive education. In fact, I was the first male Santora to graduate college.
DC: Sounds great, but also sounds like a bit of a burden.
Nick: A heavy burden. Anyway, so now I’m in law for a living, I’m hating it and miserable and I felt like she’d (my wife) eventually catch my misery and leave me because I’m such a sad-sack bastard. And I wouldn’t blame her.
A few days later, I’m in Manhattan and I’m covering a few motions that are being dealt with at he same time. I’m running from courthouse to courthouse. I’m worried that one of my cases would get marked off the court calendar because maybe I’d be late. And while I’m running , this blind woman on the corner says “would somebody help me cross the street?” So, I blow past this woman like she’s a statue, I’m half-way across the street…now this becomes a major moment in my life. Here I am, running around, literally ignoring a disabled person who’s asking for help to get to a job I fucking hate. I wondered what my mom would think if she could see me right now? So go back, grab the woman, and she keeps thanking me and I’m thinking “I have to make a change.”
My wife and I were planning a vacation. I asked her if I could take the last week of my time off and just stay home and try my hand at writing a screenplay. My wife said “Absolutely! Stop talking about it and finally write something.”
So I had that last week off. Took out my wife to dinner that Friday night, went to bed early, then Saturday morning, I sat down at our shitty kitchen table and really shitty computer in our completely shitty apartment, and I started to write. I started Saturday morning and finished around midnight the next Sunday. Nine straight days of writing and I finished a script called “Slip & Fall.”
I was so naïve. I figured I finished a script, now some agent’s going to want to represent me. See, the thing is, in California, everyone has a script. From the taxi driver to the doorman to the executives, everybody has a script. New York is a little different (at the time.) Back then in New York, nobody wrote screenplays at that time. So I went online thinking I’ll search for an agent. I typed in “screenplay agent.” What came up was a screenplay competition that had agents showing up at it.
There was also a film festival portion, and then a competition for unproduced screenplays. The directions on the contest were not to send a script but rather a synopsis. So I did. A few days later I got a call saying they’d like to read the script. But the guy from the contest said “we get hundreds and we only pick about 20 or so.” So I send it and figure that’s the end of it.
A few weeks later, I get a call saying “you’re in the competition.” I’m such a rube, I go out to Nordstroms with my wife and buy a new suit and tie that I couldn’t afford, so I can make a spiffy showing at the competition. I get there, all the other writers are dressed like slobs and now because of my suit, they think I’m an agent. So I’m getting scripts handed to me by writers, I’m getting cornered by writers, but eventually I get to pitch the judges my script and by the time I realized what was going on I realized I had somehow blown this opportunity to mix it up with agents all over this fucking suit I had worn.
A few weeks later, I’m alone in the office working on a motion and my phone rings. It’s the film festival. “Congats, we’re going to announce tomorrow that you won best screenplay.” I say “great, what do I win?” The person says to me “You win your life is going to change.”
Sure enough, I started getting calls from agencies. I signed with United Talent Agency and within a few months they got me a job writing for a show that had a 13 episode script order for a show called AT END OF DAY which was an original series for A&E. I remember the day I was supposed to start writing it. September 11, 2001.
The guy who hired me, the showrunner, Mark Rosner, called and said “you don’t have to worry. I can find someone else. I don’t expect you to finish this script with what’s going on in New York.” My response was “I want to do this more than ever.” The tragedy pointed out that any day could be your last, and I wanted this. The show didn’t get picked up, but that script did two things for me, it showed my agents that I could do the job and got me into the Writer’s Guild.
The showrunner called my agent and said “he did a great job! You should work for this guy.” A few months later I’m still doing law, and the agents call and say I have to take a meeting. I say “I can’t just pick up and take off to LA anytime there’s a possible job.” The agent said “Trust me, you want to take this meeting, and it’s in New York.”
I though a minute and said “It’s not…”
My agent replied “Yes, the meeting is with David Chase. The show is The Sopranos.”
To be continued:
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