Okay, so I haven't posted in months, but here are some quick hits of stuff you should check out:
The Walking Dead (AMC / Amazon Download / Itunes)
Okay, so you can pretty much get any content in a variety of ways. That said, please check out the 6 part Walking Dead series from Frank Darabount based on a great graphic novel. It's a great show, the zombies and situations would make George A. Romero proud, and it's just been renewed for at least 2 more seasons. This was simply one of the best plesures of the entire year in television.
Grade: A (Despite a weak final episode)
Sons Of Anarchy (F/X)
Usually a monstrous fan, but thought the 3rd season went far astray in the trip to Ireland searching for Jax's kid. If the convuloluted plot didn't throw you, we're sure Charlie Huhan's fading accent did. The season somehow ended on a high note, but boy did this feel like a wasted season.
Grade: C -
Tiny Furniture (MOVIE - NOT OUT YET)
I was lucky enough to see a xcreener of this family drama about a SoHo NYC family that reeks a bit of money and their inate dysfunction. The lead actress was a bit plump, and everything else about this was also right on the money and seemingly real. One of my very favorite films of the year.
Grade: A
THE FIGHTER (In Theaters)
Based on a true story (HBO did a documentary that included the drug-addicted brother now played rather broadly by Christian Bale) this rousing fight drama stars Mark Wahlburg as an up and coming fighter constantly undone by his dope-addicted brother, played well by Christian Bale. Great story but too much of this play strictly by the numbers and so it never trancends itself to become great, it's merely very good.
Grade: B -
More to come!
2010/12/26
2010/09/14
THE 2010 VMA awards (snore)
2010 VMAS (MTV)
Hmm.....Chelsea Handler has 1 or 2 good lines. The rest was pure shit. Truly. I like Chelsea but boy was she out of her element. Her jokes fell really flat, she stumbled over almost every one of her punchlines, and I think she thought the public was much more into her than they were. Blah.
The La Lo thing was kind of both expected and lame. I love Lindsay, but that wasn't the sketch to get things rolling.
Who would've thought the Emmy show would be more spontaneous than the VMAs?
And what about Taylor Swifts RIDICULOUS forelorn song about "growing up" and her apparant "rape" by Kanye at last year's awards shows. Enough already. For her to sit and sing like she was Tori Amos about some traumatic event....please. That better be the last of it. We con't care anymore. Really.
Some of the music was good. I applaud Gaga's meat suit. I can't really remember much else except hating myself for loving Justin Bieber's bit.
But there was a real lack of humor and fun to this that was totally the most unexpected part of the night. Who knew the VMAs could be such a bore.
Congrats Chelsea! You did it!
Grade: D -
Hmm.....Chelsea Handler has 1 or 2 good lines. The rest was pure shit. Truly. I like Chelsea but boy was she out of her element. Her jokes fell really flat, she stumbled over almost every one of her punchlines, and I think she thought the public was much more into her than they were. Blah.
The La Lo thing was kind of both expected and lame. I love Lindsay, but that wasn't the sketch to get things rolling.
Who would've thought the Emmy show would be more spontaneous than the VMAs?
And what about Taylor Swifts RIDICULOUS forelorn song about "growing up" and her apparant "rape" by Kanye at last year's awards shows. Enough already. For her to sit and sing like she was Tori Amos about some traumatic event....please. That better be the last of it. We con't care anymore. Really.
Some of the music was good. I applaud Gaga's meat suit. I can't really remember much else except hating myself for loving Justin Bieber's bit.
But there was a real lack of humor and fun to this that was totally the most unexpected part of the night. Who knew the VMAs could be such a bore.
Congrats Chelsea! You did it!
Grade: D -
2010/09/08
George Romero Would Be Proud
Man Vs. Zombies (Twitter)
The best, starkest zombie story on the web, follow Gus' Tweets. He's the only survivor of a zombie holocaust and his Tweets are sharp, funny and very much in the pocket of the genre.
Any reader of this blog knows just how well I love all things Zombie, and this site has made my daily list. Somehow, with its stark, evocative imagry, mysterious pictures and intriguing storyline, this just might be one of the best zombie stories being told. And telling it through Twitter is both bold and ingenius and reinvigorates the genre in a way that makes me love it again.
And everytime you think it's jokes, suddenly things get very serious and dark.
Bravo.
Check it out and start from the beginning.
Truly a brilliant, creepy original.
A +
Man vs. Zombies
The best, starkest zombie story on the web, follow Gus' Tweets. He's the only survivor of a zombie holocaust and his Tweets are sharp, funny and very much in the pocket of the genre.
Any reader of this blog knows just how well I love all things Zombie, and this site has made my daily list. Somehow, with its stark, evocative imagry, mysterious pictures and intriguing storyline, this just might be one of the best zombie stories being told. And telling it through Twitter is both bold and ingenius and reinvigorates the genre in a way that makes me love it again.
And everytime you think it's jokes, suddenly things get very serious and dark.
Bravo.
Check it out and start from the beginning.
Truly a brilliant, creepy original.
A +
Man vs. Zombies
2010/08/16
After-Lost Thoughts and Nick Santora, part 2!
After-Lost thoughts.
So after all my grumbling about the Lost finale, I re-watched it with ABC’s “annotations.” Those are the informative subtitles that explain what the hell is going on. It had been sitting on my DVR and I thought I'd give it one more whirl. Not only did I like the finale much better the second time around, but like many series endings, it played much better without the sky-high expectations that had dogged it since day one. In fact, I actually had a new appreciation of it and found myself both moved and thankful it wasn't just an answer to every question the series ever posed.
Rather than a mythology defining episode that tried to address every question, the finale frankly left many, if not most burning questions unanswered. Instead the show went for the emotional jugular. In retrospect, I don’t know what I expected, but re-watching, while it certainly contained an endless amount of logic and storytelling flaws, it still worked profoundly well.
In the end, there might have been one too many intrigues for the show to answer anyway. Ultimately, I think people, myself included, wanted to see our core characters happy and resolved. And in that sense, this was satisfying.
But, since this is most likely the last time I’ll ever talk about LOST on this blog, here were my quibbles with the finale:
1.) Why did Michael seem to be the only one not happy with the news that he was dead? (Everybody else seemed to know it and be thrilled about it the moment they were told.)
2.) How in God’s name would Sayid end up for eternity with Shannon when Nadia was his clear love? (This seemed to be just a way to cram in an elder cast member.)
3.) The agonizing final shot over the credits seemed to go a long way in suggesting that the whole thing never happened and that the purgatory was not just for a time, but existed the entire time. Then came news that ABC execs just chose that shot for the Lost to News transition? I’m sorry, I actually don’t believe the very final shot of the show was left to chance. There is something more to this story that we’ll probably never find out. That said, if this were true, why re-run the shot during the repeat after they had declared…ah forget it.
Jimmy Kimmel did an excellent job hosting the post-Lost finale show. He did a great question and answer section with Mathew Fox, and the parodies were right on the money all month long leading to the finale. Particularly excellent: the commercial parody of Connect Four with the Man in Black and Jacob, and the final scene that parodied The Sopranos.
LOST: Finale re-graded: B +
Jimmy Kimmel Live: Aloha to LOST: A
Jimmy Kimmel Live has been on fire this season. From the Twitter Rap bit to the brilliantly inspired Mac-Book episode, to the recent Expendables spoof, Kimmel is the best reason to stay up late these days.
Jimmy Kimmel Live (ABC)
Grade: A
Endings and Network Television
That particular two-week period of television had an interesting impact on the future of network television.
In the same week, you had the Lost ending, the 24 ending and the final episode of American Idol to feature Simon Cowell as a judge. At the same time, Breaking Bad, Mad Men, True Blood and The Closer are all example of off-network programming that has become the talk of the town. Even after all the spectacular web failures, programming online will persist and expand beyond viral videos. Old fucks like me don’t like watching a movie on the computer, but my 11 year old niece doesn’t do it any other way.
What does this all mean for the big 4 networks? Frankly, I think there will always be a place for network television and event programming that cable simply can’t do and the internet doesn’t have the setup for. I think it’s entirely possible that 2 of the 4 major networks might someday fold into one, and if that happens you can say you read it here first. But it would make me sad as I like the idea of network television and grew up on it. When I was a kid, ABC, CBS, NBC and even FOX - those names meant something to me and each network had a very specific identity.
The big task now is to have a non-reality scripted programming hit. Modern Family is a great show, but it’s still no Seinfeld. And the great hour dramas seem to keep coming from cable and pay-tv (The Sopranos, Damages, The Shield, Nip/Tuck, The Wire, Deadwood, Oz.) Lost and 24 were unique in that way, too.
I guess we’ll see what happens. I just can’t believe there are no great serialized dramas on network television anymore. With all the re-boots in the movies, why not re-start Wiseguy, Hill Street Blues or even Twin Peaks?
I guess at this point those shows would be on HBO.
These are interesting times.
George A. Romero's Survival Of The Dead (In theaters and PS2)
Wow. The distribution says it all I guess. Who would've thought that perhaps the very final chapter of Romero's zombie saga would premiere on PS2? Maybe that's a sign of the times, but readers of this blog know just how much of a zombie fan, particularly a George A. Romero Zombie fan I am, so writing this review is nothing short of heartbreaking. But it must be said. This man has lost his mojo. If you’re at all into these movies, you know that the new zombie trilogy is like the new Star Wars for zombieheads. Who did it worse? That’s a question best left for others, but I will say this. Land Of The Dead was a misguided if at least worthy film. It was more DAY than DAWN, but it had some kind of plot and point of view. In truth, it was pretty much some great nuggets and moments in a sea of shit, but someone out there did a fan-edit that nearly saved the entire film. I prefer the fan-edited version that does away with all the groaning humor and erases money as a motivating factor. Still, at its core its still the same shitty Land Of The Dead. Then came Diary Of The Dead. This seemed promising. It was the first time in 30 years Romero was doing an indie zombie film and one had high hopes for this, in the way of his original masterpiece Night Of The Living Dead.
After a particularly rousing opening, the kids with the camera POV didn’t work very well due to some bad acting, some really bad dialogue and Romero’s deep misunderstanding of “those crazy kids on the net!” Lastly, (although I hear he’s making yet another) we have “Survival Of The Dead.” Which, for the first time is almost a sequel in that characters who made a brief appearance in DIARY are given the leads here.
What to say about this movie? I don't know. I think if you took the central story out, a take on the Hatfields and the McCoy's (I swear I'm not making this up) this could've been cool. Reviewing this almost makes no sense. It is what it is. And that isn't much. That said, I will probably watch any Romero zombie film that he shoots till the day I die. Maybe he'll rediscover himself at some point but....I don't know. I don't even know what to make of this film, much less the ridiculously pretentious final shot.
Still, Romero is the master, and just as Bob Dylan puts out some really shit CDs in between the good ones, I'm still hoping for Romero to knock one of these out of the park.
The Seth McFarlane 1 1/2 Animated Sunday Show (American Dad, Family Guy, The Cleveland Show)(Fox)
What better way to enjoy a Sunday evening with The Simpsons, followed by 90 minutes of Seth McFarlane's hijacking of Sunday night. American Dad, Family Guy and The Cleveland Show are all such reliable laugh getters that I'm starting to wish Seth could take over as showrunner on The Simpsons and maybe pump some new life into that veteran show. While The Simpsons can still come up with a great episode here and there, these days it plays more like an appetizer to the real Sunday night main course.
Losing It with Jillian (NBC)
Jillian, the lithe, angry trainer from The Biggest Loser, gets her own hour here in which she travels to new cities to scream at and belittle mostly minorities about their eating habits. After everybody cries, she comes back in 5 weeks to find the people who were yelled out lost 25 pounds because NBC told them to. Despite all this, I love it. Fat people losing weight never gets old.
Grade: B
88 Minutes (HBO)
Truly ludicrous. I could go on about the insane plot twists, the first-rate cast reduced to acting this out, Pacino's hammy performance, the insanity of the last ten minutes, the fact that this is called 88 minutes but lasts almost 2 hours, but then, you haven't quite lived till you've seen this film.
Grade: It's so bad it's good.
Face/Off (DVD)
A highly over-looked and slightly over-cooked piece of cinema from the late 90s when Travolta was still super-interesting after his Pulp Fiction turn. Nicholas Cage is terrific largely playing Travolta, and while the plot might be ludicrous, it somehow works as long as you don't ask too many questions. Overlong by about 20 minutes, this John Woo directed wannabe epic has a mighty score, some dynamite scenes, echoes of every film he's ever done, and stands as the sole project he's directed in America that comes close to the kind of films he made in Hong Kong.
Grade: B +
Big Brother (CBS – summer 2010)
A lot of fun this summer. I loved the mean redhead, can't get enough of the intelligence-challenged Enzo, and think they got it right this year casting-wise. Who will win? Tough to say since they got rid of Rachel who was my first bet, but Brendon seems to have been coated in Teflon. We'll see, but for the moment I'll go with Brendon if he can turn things around. Some might say he's playing like a chump, others might recognize he's playing a brilliant game.
Grade: B
Drawn Together Movie:The Movie! (DVD)
After 3 increasingly funny and outrageously profane seasons, Comedy Central mysteriously and quietly cancelled this animated half hour. I loved this show, and I liked the wrap-up movie that we never thought was coming. While not as fun as the series, this is a nice way to get some closure, and the DVD is chock full of extras that answer almost every question about the movie, the future, and the actors playing the roles. (Is that innocent Cree Summers from "A Different World" voicing the dirtiest character on TV, Foxxxy Brown?)
And the extras, including the 3D controversy, is plenty reason to check out this disc and say goodbye forever to these strange, disgusting and mostly hilarious characters
Series Grade: A
Finale Grade: B +
NICK SANTORA interview: part 2!
We talk about The Sopranos "Watching Too Much Television."
When we first started our interview with Nick, we covered how he went from being a Brooklyn lawyer to someone trying to break into TV writing. This time around, I get a very somber Nick as his great pilot, Breakout Kings, was not picked up for pilot season for an order. (Things have since changed, but at the time of this article, things for Breakout Kings seemed very dim.)
We pick up the story and dive right into one of this blog's favorite subjects: The Sopranos. Nick penned the very popular 4th season episode "Watching too much television" which had Adrianna planning to marry Chris so she could have an excuse not to testify against him, Tony & Co. planning a major HUD related scam to cheat the lower-income neighborhood out of housing money, but this episode is easily best known for the beat-down that occurred when Tony finally extrapolated from the news that his politico buddy, Zelman, was living with his ex-girlfriend, Irena. The scene that ended that episode is still one of the most talked about moments from the series and I got a chance to discuss the episode in detail with Nick, who was nice enough to give me the time even though he had many things going on. As usual, our conversation took place while Nick was driving around to various meetings and commitments.
Digital Couch: Welcome back, Nick. My readers enjoyed your last interview very much and I thought it was a nice buildup to talk about what went into you getting to write on one of this blog's all time favorite shows, and one of the best episodes to boot. Thanks for submitting to this again.
Nick Santora: No problem. My pleasure. If your readers want some Sopranos talk, I'm happy to provide it.
DC: Great. So, I know you're a busy man. Let's dive right in. Last we left off, you get a call and it's your agent telling you that you're meeting with David Chase, who had read your screenplay Slip & Fall, which later became your best-selling novel. What happens next?
Nick: I had to take this meeting with David Chase. I was practicing law in Brooklyn at the time. Around the corner from Silvercup Studios in Queens, where they filmed the show, was a parking lot and I remember sitting in that parking lot and being so nervous to get out of the car. Eventually I get out and start walking around to get to Chase’s office and I remember having this exact specific thought “Whatever happens in the next hour will dictate the rest of my life.”
I knew writing a Sopranos would change my life as I knew it. I also knew there were a million ways to not get the job, so I decided going in to 100 percent be myself and not pretend to be some slick writer because at the time I wasn’t really a writer; I was a lawyer with an office over a pizza place in Brooklyn. And I knew that Chase probably liked me as a writer because he enjoyed the screenplay's subject of a man who was naïve, who was essentially me.
DC: What was that day like, knowing you had a meeting with David Chase?
Nick: A stressful element was that the day I was supposed to meet with David I was supposed to be in court. I was told by one of the partners that I couldn’t get out of court. And I just said “I’m going.” He said “No, you’re going to court.” I stood my ground, and said “I quit.” So I left work that day thinking I no longer had a legal career. I called my wife and said “I no longer have a job anymore.” After the meeting with David, I called my office the next day and they gruffly said “come back to work.”
DC: Good thing. But let's get back to the meeting with David Chase.
Nick: The offices for The Sopranos were so much cooler and hipper than the pizza joint. I was led into a large writer’s room at a huge table where I met David Chase and Terry Winter, who later became a friend. Winter really is the nicest guy ever. Mitch Burgess and Robin Greene were in the room. And David Chase was in the room.
I sat across from David. There's this huge table but David sat right next to me. We started talking and it was crazy because it was the height of Sopranos popularity and he was telling me how much he loved my script. He asked me what I felt about The Sopranos. I told him the truth, that is was the best show on TV. He said “I hope you don’t like the characters because these guys are sociopaths. You have to write them as bad guys and killers, don’t get tricked into romanticizing them.” I told him “I won’t if I get the job.”
He smiles and said “in your screenplay there’s a character whose smile is real but then turns on the hero on a dime, and that's the world of the Sopranos.” We talked for a while. He was very concerned as to whether I would have the time to write the script with my legal practice. I said I will have more than enough time because I had a couple of weeks off for Christmas, but the truth was I just didn’t know if I had even had a job left for me. But I was scared to tell him about that because I didn’t want him to think I was a flake who quits a job over a meeting.
DC: So then what happens?
Nick: He thanks me for my time. They all said goodbye. During the meeting Terry didn’t say too much but we talked later and I found out that what we had in common is that he, in a past life, was a personal injury defense attorney and we knew a lot of the same people and I admired Terry because the only thing more horrible and boring than being a plaintiff’s personal injury lawyer was working for the insurance companies like he did and he found a way out too.
I left that meeting and went back home to my apt. in New York that I shared with my wife, but I wasn’t confident about the job because I couldn’t see Chase hiring an attorney who hadn't written television before. I started getting depressed because I thought I should’ve done something different in the meeting. I started getting into a dark, depressed place that night. My wife and I took a walk that night in the freezing cold. When we got back my agents called. I said “what’s up guys?” They said “Congrats. You got the job!"
I lost it. I pumped my fist in the air, my dog went nuts, my wife and I got in the car and drove to my parents house and went in and told them I didn’t get the job to goof with them, then I told them the good news. Called a few of my friends – everyone was so happy for me. That was one of the best feelings about the whole experience. True happiness for me from people who cared about me.
A few days later I was supposed to go through the beat sheet with the staff about what the episode would be. At this point, I’m back at work at my law firm like George Costanza – all was forgotten and forgiven. Then I was at court with all these motions and later that afternoon I was supposed to leave for David Chase. The judge showed up late and now it was time to go to Silvercup. So I pulled the judge’s court clerk aside and said “look man, you gotta help me and call my case.’ He said “I can’t play favorites.” I told him I had a big thing – he didn’t care. I begged him. He couldn’t do anything for me. I said “I’ll be completely honest with you: I have a meeting with the creator of the Sopranos." He says “are you lying? That's my favorite show." Next thing I know, they call my case, I rush from Brooklyn to Queens and next thing you know – I'm at Silvercup Studios.
Now I’m with the rest of the team. That was very interesting to me because it was the first time I had actually seen a beat sheet and I was surprised how lean it was. It was just bullet points like “Tony and the gang welcome Paulie back from prison,” “guys sit in the steam room and talk about the Hud scam,” etc. Then we talked in depth about the scenes and where the characters were headed and they gave me those episodes that hadn't aired yet. It was very top secret – signed disclosure forms. I just couldn’t wait to hand those scripts back to Silvercup so they knew I didn’t lose them.
Then I went off to write, and that weekend I started writing the script in my in-laws basement in NJ – my wife wanted to spend the weekend with her parents and my father in law had a nice quiet basement office.
DC: At this point, and for readers of this blog, it’s time for Sopranos geek-out time:
Okay, you said you had a basic beat sheet. One of the most memorable things about the episode is the way Tony beat Zelman with that belt. Where did that idea come from?
Nick: The idea of Tony going after Zelman at the end of the episode was in the beat sheet, and later in the day the idea was floated in the room but 10 years ago, not sure who came up with the belt idea specifically. But the idea of Tony going after Zelman was not my idea – all the credit goes to the Sopranos team. But when I wrote the script, I wanted Zelman to be naked, and the actor refused to be naked.
Writing it was exhilarating but halfway though the first scene when I typed in the name TONY and hit ENTER, I realized I was about to start putting words in Tony’s mouth, and I remember thinking “holy shit, I’m a guy with no produced writing credits in his in-laws basement and I’m about to start writing dialog for one of the most famous characters in television history." Then I took a deep breath, exhaled and started pounding the keys.
DC: Tony always walked the line between being likable and monstrous. But we'd never seen him be quite that petty and horrible before (that I could think of.) How did you feel about him beating Zelman?
Nick: My feeling is that it was in character with what Tony would do…when I was in my meeting with Chase, and he told me Tony would go after Zelman, I remember I said out loud, to myself: “this is going to be cool.” Chase mimicked me and laughed. He was getting a kick out if the excited kid lawyer.
DC: Was it the song "oh, girl" that set Tony off?
Nick: I don’t think it was only the song. One way or another, Tony would’ve found another reason to beat the shit out of the guy. But the song was the trigger.
DC: In Sopranos mythology, everyone always talks about the fact that when Zelman first talked about Irena, we saw some shots of him putting on his belt. The same belt he'd later beat Zelman with over this very issue. Was that in the script?
Nick: It wasn't. John Patterson directed the episode, but he’s unfortunately since passed and I'm not sure about the evolution of that sequence.
DC: I always thought after the beating that Irena wanted to leave with Tony. It looked like she wasn't sure what to do at the end.
Nick: That was performance and the director. I just had Tony leave them.
DC: How did you feel about the doomed romance between Furio and Carmella?
Nick: That was fun because it was a slow build but it had a great payoff in the season finale when it all came out.
DC: Anything big in the script that didn't get filmed?
Nick: The original C story was AJ having a crush on a girl at school and he gets a big sty in his eye and he gets teased for it and there was this whole parallel story about how Tony deals with Irena not being his – but Chase decided not to do that AJ storyline. I was already working on The Guardian when he made this decision so they came up with a new C story that dealt with Adrianna and that lead to one of the biggest honors of my career, sharing screen credit with Terry Winter.
DC: Do you remember some of your lines that made you happy to watch play out?
Nick: Oh, it was so long ago. I liked the line about Paulie getting laid in prison all the time. I also remember writing “Buy land, ‘cause God ain’t makin’ any more of it,” and Tony’s toast to the federal government, amongst others.
DC: What was one of the most surprising things about the experience for you?
Nick: The thing that really came across to me is how great the show's writers and producers are because every day they had created these underlying subliminal themes in the episode: no matter how hard you try 2you can’t get out of this world once you’ve made that choice. I thought that was all over my episode. That idea, that theme. You see with Irena, with Zelman and especially with Adrianna. But even Tony can’t get out of this world if you look at what he eventually did…..you can’t get away from the nature of that business.
DC: Was there anything very differently shot from your original intention?
Nick: No. The director did such a great job, I was just really honored. And writing that type of material was great. That HUD thing, the circle of corruption has so many victims. People don’t even realize that they’re victims of organized crime. People don't think that every slice of pizza you buy is jacked up 20 percent because the owner has to give something for protection. Details like that are what made The Sopranos such a great show. Because we liked these guys, but they were absolutely corrupt.
DC: So you finish the script, hand it in - then what?
Nick: After writing it and being done, right before Christmas 2001, that’s when I decided to give full time writing a chance. I got my bonus check from my law firm that Christmas and as soon as it cleared, I quit. It was so liberating. Then I went out to L.A. to look for writing work while my wife stayed in New York to finish up her job.
I was out here 16 days and the day my wife flew out to L.A. to spend a few days with me, I got the call that I'd been hired by the CBS show The Guardian, so me and my wife got to celebrate that together.
DC: So how long after you handed in your Sopranos script did it air?
Nick: Nine months later or so; I was working on The Guardian when it aired. We were in L.A. My wife and I invited our new friends in LA to our apartment for a huge Italian dinner for our Sopranos episode. We invited 12 people to sit in the tiny apartment to watch it. My wife cooked all day; pasta and meatballs, red wine. We were planning on watching the West Coast feed with our friends, but we had DIRECT TV and it just came on via the East Coast feed as we were getting ready for the party. So we just said "oh, crap, we can watch this earlier than everyone else," so my wife and I sat on the couch and we watched the episode by ourselves before everyone came over.
It was weird. The moment the credit came up and I saw my name on the screen, I started crying. So many people thought it was insane to leave a steady job and even though it turned out well, so many people told me I was crazy, stupid. People told me it was impossible to break into this business when you didn’t know anybody. I just felt this complete and utter release of pressure – after that aired I felt like I had proven to myself that I could do it. Just an incredibly emotional release. My wife was asking me what was wrong – I said “I’m just so damn happy.” It was such a cathartic moment – I’m so thankful to David Chase and Terry Winter, who was so great during the whole episode – just a prince. During the writing he had given me his home number, cell, etc. He said, “call if you have questions. I want this to be a good experience for you.”
The Guardian was a great situation, full 22 episodes were ordered but we wound up doing 23 and as a staff writer I wrote a whole bunch of scripts scripts and they wound up promoting me in a year to co-producer.
After The Sopranos aired, a lot of people who hadn’t been in touch with me for a long time saw my credit and reached out and expressed congratulations. I got a huge boost of confidence. I’ll always be able to say that I had a tiny tiny part/membership card to an exclusive club for a brief moment of time and that’s something I’ll always be proud of.
DC: What was James Gandolfini like?
Nick: He’s larger than life, he’s a physical presence and I’m not a small guy. He just kind of grumbled past and Terry says “Hey Jim, this is Nick Santora. He was the writer on the episode.” He goes “how you doing Nicky?” That was it. But I got to write for one of the great American actors of our generation.
DC: When's the last time you saw the episode?
Nick: Maybe nine years? I rarely get to go back and see my old work.
DC: Thanks again for the time. I thought it was one of the best episodes of the series and it was great to hear about it. Thanks again.
Next up: Prison Break and beyond!
So after all my grumbling about the Lost finale, I re-watched it with ABC’s “annotations.” Those are the informative subtitles that explain what the hell is going on. It had been sitting on my DVR and I thought I'd give it one more whirl. Not only did I like the finale much better the second time around, but like many series endings, it played much better without the sky-high expectations that had dogged it since day one. In fact, I actually had a new appreciation of it and found myself both moved and thankful it wasn't just an answer to every question the series ever posed.
Rather than a mythology defining episode that tried to address every question, the finale frankly left many, if not most burning questions unanswered. Instead the show went for the emotional jugular. In retrospect, I don’t know what I expected, but re-watching, while it certainly contained an endless amount of logic and storytelling flaws, it still worked profoundly well.
In the end, there might have been one too many intrigues for the show to answer anyway. Ultimately, I think people, myself included, wanted to see our core characters happy and resolved. And in that sense, this was satisfying.
But, since this is most likely the last time I’ll ever talk about LOST on this blog, here were my quibbles with the finale:
1.) Why did Michael seem to be the only one not happy with the news that he was dead? (Everybody else seemed to know it and be thrilled about it the moment they were told.)
2.) How in God’s name would Sayid end up for eternity with Shannon when Nadia was his clear love? (This seemed to be just a way to cram in an elder cast member.)
3.) The agonizing final shot over the credits seemed to go a long way in suggesting that the whole thing never happened and that the purgatory was not just for a time, but existed the entire time. Then came news that ABC execs just chose that shot for the Lost to News transition? I’m sorry, I actually don’t believe the very final shot of the show was left to chance. There is something more to this story that we’ll probably never find out. That said, if this were true, why re-run the shot during the repeat after they had declared…ah forget it.
Jimmy Kimmel did an excellent job hosting the post-Lost finale show. He did a great question and answer section with Mathew Fox, and the parodies were right on the money all month long leading to the finale. Particularly excellent: the commercial parody of Connect Four with the Man in Black and Jacob, and the final scene that parodied The Sopranos.
LOST: Finale re-graded: B +
Jimmy Kimmel Live: Aloha to LOST: A
Jimmy Kimmel Live has been on fire this season. From the Twitter Rap bit to the brilliantly inspired Mac-Book episode, to the recent Expendables spoof, Kimmel is the best reason to stay up late these days.
Jimmy Kimmel Live (ABC)
Grade: A
Endings and Network Television
That particular two-week period of television had an interesting impact on the future of network television.
In the same week, you had the Lost ending, the 24 ending and the final episode of American Idol to feature Simon Cowell as a judge. At the same time, Breaking Bad, Mad Men, True Blood and The Closer are all example of off-network programming that has become the talk of the town. Even after all the spectacular web failures, programming online will persist and expand beyond viral videos. Old fucks like me don’t like watching a movie on the computer, but my 11 year old niece doesn’t do it any other way.
What does this all mean for the big 4 networks? Frankly, I think there will always be a place for network television and event programming that cable simply can’t do and the internet doesn’t have the setup for. I think it’s entirely possible that 2 of the 4 major networks might someday fold into one, and if that happens you can say you read it here first. But it would make me sad as I like the idea of network television and grew up on it. When I was a kid, ABC, CBS, NBC and even FOX - those names meant something to me and each network had a very specific identity.
The big task now is to have a non-reality scripted programming hit. Modern Family is a great show, but it’s still no Seinfeld. And the great hour dramas seem to keep coming from cable and pay-tv (The Sopranos, Damages, The Shield, Nip/Tuck, The Wire, Deadwood, Oz.) Lost and 24 were unique in that way, too.
I guess we’ll see what happens. I just can’t believe there are no great serialized dramas on network television anymore. With all the re-boots in the movies, why not re-start Wiseguy, Hill Street Blues or even Twin Peaks?
I guess at this point those shows would be on HBO.
These are interesting times.
George A. Romero's Survival Of The Dead (In theaters and PS2)
Wow. The distribution says it all I guess. Who would've thought that perhaps the very final chapter of Romero's zombie saga would premiere on PS2? Maybe that's a sign of the times, but readers of this blog know just how much of a zombie fan, particularly a George A. Romero Zombie fan I am, so writing this review is nothing short of heartbreaking. But it must be said. This man has lost his mojo. If you’re at all into these movies, you know that the new zombie trilogy is like the new Star Wars for zombieheads. Who did it worse? That’s a question best left for others, but I will say this. Land Of The Dead was a misguided if at least worthy film. It was more DAY than DAWN, but it had some kind of plot and point of view. In truth, it was pretty much some great nuggets and moments in a sea of shit, but someone out there did a fan-edit that nearly saved the entire film. I prefer the fan-edited version that does away with all the groaning humor and erases money as a motivating factor. Still, at its core its still the same shitty Land Of The Dead. Then came Diary Of The Dead. This seemed promising. It was the first time in 30 years Romero was doing an indie zombie film and one had high hopes for this, in the way of his original masterpiece Night Of The Living Dead.
After a particularly rousing opening, the kids with the camera POV didn’t work very well due to some bad acting, some really bad dialogue and Romero’s deep misunderstanding of “those crazy kids on the net!” Lastly, (although I hear he’s making yet another) we have “Survival Of The Dead.” Which, for the first time is almost a sequel in that characters who made a brief appearance in DIARY are given the leads here.
What to say about this movie? I don't know. I think if you took the central story out, a take on the Hatfields and the McCoy's (I swear I'm not making this up) this could've been cool. Reviewing this almost makes no sense. It is what it is. And that isn't much. That said, I will probably watch any Romero zombie film that he shoots till the day I die. Maybe he'll rediscover himself at some point but....I don't know. I don't even know what to make of this film, much less the ridiculously pretentious final shot.
Still, Romero is the master, and just as Bob Dylan puts out some really shit CDs in between the good ones, I'm still hoping for Romero to knock one of these out of the park.
The Seth McFarlane 1 1/2 Animated Sunday Show (American Dad, Family Guy, The Cleveland Show)(Fox)
What better way to enjoy a Sunday evening with The Simpsons, followed by 90 minutes of Seth McFarlane's hijacking of Sunday night. American Dad, Family Guy and The Cleveland Show are all such reliable laugh getters that I'm starting to wish Seth could take over as showrunner on The Simpsons and maybe pump some new life into that veteran show. While The Simpsons can still come up with a great episode here and there, these days it plays more like an appetizer to the real Sunday night main course.
Losing It with Jillian (NBC)
Jillian, the lithe, angry trainer from The Biggest Loser, gets her own hour here in which she travels to new cities to scream at and belittle mostly minorities about their eating habits. After everybody cries, she comes back in 5 weeks to find the people who were yelled out lost 25 pounds because NBC told them to. Despite all this, I love it. Fat people losing weight never gets old.
Grade: B
88 Minutes (HBO)
Truly ludicrous. I could go on about the insane plot twists, the first-rate cast reduced to acting this out, Pacino's hammy performance, the insanity of the last ten minutes, the fact that this is called 88 minutes but lasts almost 2 hours, but then, you haven't quite lived till you've seen this film.
Grade: It's so bad it's good.
Face/Off (DVD)
A highly over-looked and slightly over-cooked piece of cinema from the late 90s when Travolta was still super-interesting after his Pulp Fiction turn. Nicholas Cage is terrific largely playing Travolta, and while the plot might be ludicrous, it somehow works as long as you don't ask too many questions. Overlong by about 20 minutes, this John Woo directed wannabe epic has a mighty score, some dynamite scenes, echoes of every film he's ever done, and stands as the sole project he's directed in America that comes close to the kind of films he made in Hong Kong.
Grade: B +
Big Brother (CBS – summer 2010)
A lot of fun this summer. I loved the mean redhead, can't get enough of the intelligence-challenged Enzo, and think they got it right this year casting-wise. Who will win? Tough to say since they got rid of Rachel who was my first bet, but Brendon seems to have been coated in Teflon. We'll see, but for the moment I'll go with Brendon if he can turn things around. Some might say he's playing like a chump, others might recognize he's playing a brilliant game.
Grade: B
Drawn Together Movie:The Movie! (DVD)
After 3 increasingly funny and outrageously profane seasons, Comedy Central mysteriously and quietly cancelled this animated half hour. I loved this show, and I liked the wrap-up movie that we never thought was coming. While not as fun as the series, this is a nice way to get some closure, and the DVD is chock full of extras that answer almost every question about the movie, the future, and the actors playing the roles. (Is that innocent Cree Summers from "A Different World" voicing the dirtiest character on TV, Foxxxy Brown?)
And the extras, including the 3D controversy, is plenty reason to check out this disc and say goodbye forever to these strange, disgusting and mostly hilarious characters
Series Grade: A
Finale Grade: B +
NICK SANTORA interview: part 2!
We talk about The Sopranos "Watching Too Much Television."
When we first started our interview with Nick, we covered how he went from being a Brooklyn lawyer to someone trying to break into TV writing. This time around, I get a very somber Nick as his great pilot, Breakout Kings, was not picked up for pilot season for an order. (Things have since changed, but at the time of this article, things for Breakout Kings seemed very dim.)
We pick up the story and dive right into one of this blog's favorite subjects: The Sopranos. Nick penned the very popular 4th season episode "Watching too much television" which had Adrianna planning to marry Chris so she could have an excuse not to testify against him, Tony & Co. planning a major HUD related scam to cheat the lower-income neighborhood out of housing money, but this episode is easily best known for the beat-down that occurred when Tony finally extrapolated from the news that his politico buddy, Zelman, was living with his ex-girlfriend, Irena. The scene that ended that episode is still one of the most talked about moments from the series and I got a chance to discuss the episode in detail with Nick, who was nice enough to give me the time even though he had many things going on. As usual, our conversation took place while Nick was driving around to various meetings and commitments.
Digital Couch: Welcome back, Nick. My readers enjoyed your last interview very much and I thought it was a nice buildup to talk about what went into you getting to write on one of this blog's all time favorite shows, and one of the best episodes to boot. Thanks for submitting to this again.
Nick Santora: No problem. My pleasure. If your readers want some Sopranos talk, I'm happy to provide it.
DC: Great. So, I know you're a busy man. Let's dive right in. Last we left off, you get a call and it's your agent telling you that you're meeting with David Chase, who had read your screenplay Slip & Fall, which later became your best-selling novel. What happens next?
Nick: I had to take this meeting with David Chase. I was practicing law in Brooklyn at the time. Around the corner from Silvercup Studios in Queens, where they filmed the show, was a parking lot and I remember sitting in that parking lot and being so nervous to get out of the car. Eventually I get out and start walking around to get to Chase’s office and I remember having this exact specific thought “Whatever happens in the next hour will dictate the rest of my life.”
I knew writing a Sopranos would change my life as I knew it. I also knew there were a million ways to not get the job, so I decided going in to 100 percent be myself and not pretend to be some slick writer because at the time I wasn’t really a writer; I was a lawyer with an office over a pizza place in Brooklyn. And I knew that Chase probably liked me as a writer because he enjoyed the screenplay's subject of a man who was naïve, who was essentially me.
DC: What was that day like, knowing you had a meeting with David Chase?
Nick: A stressful element was that the day I was supposed to meet with David I was supposed to be in court. I was told by one of the partners that I couldn’t get out of court. And I just said “I’m going.” He said “No, you’re going to court.” I stood my ground, and said “I quit.” So I left work that day thinking I no longer had a legal career. I called my wife and said “I no longer have a job anymore.” After the meeting with David, I called my office the next day and they gruffly said “come back to work.”
DC: Good thing. But let's get back to the meeting with David Chase.
Nick: The offices for The Sopranos were so much cooler and hipper than the pizza joint. I was led into a large writer’s room at a huge table where I met David Chase and Terry Winter, who later became a friend. Winter really is the nicest guy ever. Mitch Burgess and Robin Greene were in the room. And David Chase was in the room.
I sat across from David. There's this huge table but David sat right next to me. We started talking and it was crazy because it was the height of Sopranos popularity and he was telling me how much he loved my script. He asked me what I felt about The Sopranos. I told him the truth, that is was the best show on TV. He said “I hope you don’t like the characters because these guys are sociopaths. You have to write them as bad guys and killers, don’t get tricked into romanticizing them.” I told him “I won’t if I get the job.”
He smiles and said “in your screenplay there’s a character whose smile is real but then turns on the hero on a dime, and that's the world of the Sopranos.” We talked for a while. He was very concerned as to whether I would have the time to write the script with my legal practice. I said I will have more than enough time because I had a couple of weeks off for Christmas, but the truth was I just didn’t know if I had even had a job left for me. But I was scared to tell him about that because I didn’t want him to think I was a flake who quits a job over a meeting.
DC: So then what happens?
Nick: He thanks me for my time. They all said goodbye. During the meeting Terry didn’t say too much but we talked later and I found out that what we had in common is that he, in a past life, was a personal injury defense attorney and we knew a lot of the same people and I admired Terry because the only thing more horrible and boring than being a plaintiff’s personal injury lawyer was working for the insurance companies like he did and he found a way out too.
I left that meeting and went back home to my apt. in New York that I shared with my wife, but I wasn’t confident about the job because I couldn’t see Chase hiring an attorney who hadn't written television before. I started getting depressed because I thought I should’ve done something different in the meeting. I started getting into a dark, depressed place that night. My wife and I took a walk that night in the freezing cold. When we got back my agents called. I said “what’s up guys?” They said “Congrats. You got the job!"
I lost it. I pumped my fist in the air, my dog went nuts, my wife and I got in the car and drove to my parents house and went in and told them I didn’t get the job to goof with them, then I told them the good news. Called a few of my friends – everyone was so happy for me. That was one of the best feelings about the whole experience. True happiness for me from people who cared about me.
A few days later I was supposed to go through the beat sheet with the staff about what the episode would be. At this point, I’m back at work at my law firm like George Costanza – all was forgotten and forgiven. Then I was at court with all these motions and later that afternoon I was supposed to leave for David Chase. The judge showed up late and now it was time to go to Silvercup. So I pulled the judge’s court clerk aside and said “look man, you gotta help me and call my case.’ He said “I can’t play favorites.” I told him I had a big thing – he didn’t care. I begged him. He couldn’t do anything for me. I said “I’ll be completely honest with you: I have a meeting with the creator of the Sopranos." He says “are you lying? That's my favorite show." Next thing I know, they call my case, I rush from Brooklyn to Queens and next thing you know – I'm at Silvercup Studios.
Now I’m with the rest of the team. That was very interesting to me because it was the first time I had actually seen a beat sheet and I was surprised how lean it was. It was just bullet points like “Tony and the gang welcome Paulie back from prison,” “guys sit in the steam room and talk about the Hud scam,” etc. Then we talked in depth about the scenes and where the characters were headed and they gave me those episodes that hadn't aired yet. It was very top secret – signed disclosure forms. I just couldn’t wait to hand those scripts back to Silvercup so they knew I didn’t lose them.
Then I went off to write, and that weekend I started writing the script in my in-laws basement in NJ – my wife wanted to spend the weekend with her parents and my father in law had a nice quiet basement office.
DC: At this point, and for readers of this blog, it’s time for Sopranos geek-out time:
Okay, you said you had a basic beat sheet. One of the most memorable things about the episode is the way Tony beat Zelman with that belt. Where did that idea come from?
Nick: The idea of Tony going after Zelman at the end of the episode was in the beat sheet, and later in the day the idea was floated in the room but 10 years ago, not sure who came up with the belt idea specifically. But the idea of Tony going after Zelman was not my idea – all the credit goes to the Sopranos team. But when I wrote the script, I wanted Zelman to be naked, and the actor refused to be naked.
Writing it was exhilarating but halfway though the first scene when I typed in the name TONY and hit ENTER, I realized I was about to start putting words in Tony’s mouth, and I remember thinking “holy shit, I’m a guy with no produced writing credits in his in-laws basement and I’m about to start writing dialog for one of the most famous characters in television history." Then I took a deep breath, exhaled and started pounding the keys.
DC: Tony always walked the line between being likable and monstrous. But we'd never seen him be quite that petty and horrible before (that I could think of.) How did you feel about him beating Zelman?
Nick: My feeling is that it was in character with what Tony would do…when I was in my meeting with Chase, and he told me Tony would go after Zelman, I remember I said out loud, to myself: “this is going to be cool.” Chase mimicked me and laughed. He was getting a kick out if the excited kid lawyer.
DC: Was it the song "oh, girl" that set Tony off?
Nick: I don’t think it was only the song. One way or another, Tony would’ve found another reason to beat the shit out of the guy. But the song was the trigger.
DC: In Sopranos mythology, everyone always talks about the fact that when Zelman first talked about Irena, we saw some shots of him putting on his belt. The same belt he'd later beat Zelman with over this very issue. Was that in the script?
Nick: It wasn't. John Patterson directed the episode, but he’s unfortunately since passed and I'm not sure about the evolution of that sequence.
DC: I always thought after the beating that Irena wanted to leave with Tony. It looked like she wasn't sure what to do at the end.
Nick: That was performance and the director. I just had Tony leave them.
DC: How did you feel about the doomed romance between Furio and Carmella?
Nick: That was fun because it was a slow build but it had a great payoff in the season finale when it all came out.
DC: Anything big in the script that didn't get filmed?
Nick: The original C story was AJ having a crush on a girl at school and he gets a big sty in his eye and he gets teased for it and there was this whole parallel story about how Tony deals with Irena not being his – but Chase decided not to do that AJ storyline. I was already working on The Guardian when he made this decision so they came up with a new C story that dealt with Adrianna and that lead to one of the biggest honors of my career, sharing screen credit with Terry Winter.
DC: Do you remember some of your lines that made you happy to watch play out?
Nick: Oh, it was so long ago. I liked the line about Paulie getting laid in prison all the time. I also remember writing “Buy land, ‘cause God ain’t makin’ any more of it,” and Tony’s toast to the federal government, amongst others.
DC: What was one of the most surprising things about the experience for you?
Nick: The thing that really came across to me is how great the show's writers and producers are because every day they had created these underlying subliminal themes in the episode: no matter how hard you try 2you can’t get out of this world once you’ve made that choice. I thought that was all over my episode. That idea, that theme. You see with Irena, with Zelman and especially with Adrianna. But even Tony can’t get out of this world if you look at what he eventually did…..you can’t get away from the nature of that business.
DC: Was there anything very differently shot from your original intention?
Nick: No. The director did such a great job, I was just really honored. And writing that type of material was great. That HUD thing, the circle of corruption has so many victims. People don’t even realize that they’re victims of organized crime. People don't think that every slice of pizza you buy is jacked up 20 percent because the owner has to give something for protection. Details like that are what made The Sopranos such a great show. Because we liked these guys, but they were absolutely corrupt.
DC: So you finish the script, hand it in - then what?
Nick: After writing it and being done, right before Christmas 2001, that’s when I decided to give full time writing a chance. I got my bonus check from my law firm that Christmas and as soon as it cleared, I quit. It was so liberating. Then I went out to L.A. to look for writing work while my wife stayed in New York to finish up her job.
I was out here 16 days and the day my wife flew out to L.A. to spend a few days with me, I got the call that I'd been hired by the CBS show The Guardian, so me and my wife got to celebrate that together.
DC: So how long after you handed in your Sopranos script did it air?
Nick: Nine months later or so; I was working on The Guardian when it aired. We were in L.A. My wife and I invited our new friends in LA to our apartment for a huge Italian dinner for our Sopranos episode. We invited 12 people to sit in the tiny apartment to watch it. My wife cooked all day; pasta and meatballs, red wine. We were planning on watching the West Coast feed with our friends, but we had DIRECT TV and it just came on via the East Coast feed as we were getting ready for the party. So we just said "oh, crap, we can watch this earlier than everyone else," so my wife and I sat on the couch and we watched the episode by ourselves before everyone came over.
It was weird. The moment the credit came up and I saw my name on the screen, I started crying. So many people thought it was insane to leave a steady job and even though it turned out well, so many people told me I was crazy, stupid. People told me it was impossible to break into this business when you didn’t know anybody. I just felt this complete and utter release of pressure – after that aired I felt like I had proven to myself that I could do it. Just an incredibly emotional release. My wife was asking me what was wrong – I said “I’m just so damn happy.” It was such a cathartic moment – I’m so thankful to David Chase and Terry Winter, who was so great during the whole episode – just a prince. During the writing he had given me his home number, cell, etc. He said, “call if you have questions. I want this to be a good experience for you.”
The Guardian was a great situation, full 22 episodes were ordered but we wound up doing 23 and as a staff writer I wrote a whole bunch of scripts scripts and they wound up promoting me in a year to co-producer.
After The Sopranos aired, a lot of people who hadn’t been in touch with me for a long time saw my credit and reached out and expressed congratulations. I got a huge boost of confidence. I’ll always be able to say that I had a tiny tiny part/membership card to an exclusive club for a brief moment of time and that’s something I’ll always be proud of.
DC: What was James Gandolfini like?
Nick: He’s larger than life, he’s a physical presence and I’m not a small guy. He just kind of grumbled past and Terry says “Hey Jim, this is Nick Santora. He was the writer on the episode.” He goes “how you doing Nicky?” That was it. But I got to write for one of the great American actors of our generation.
DC: When's the last time you saw the episode?
Nick: Maybe nine years? I rarely get to go back and see my old work.
DC: Thanks again for the time. I thought it was one of the best episodes of the series and it was great to hear about it. Thanks again.
Next up: Prison Break and beyond!
2010/07/21
Hot Tub Time Machine! Bronson! And more!
TVBronson (DVD)
Nicolas Winding Refn, who made the absolutely brilliant Pusher trilogy, directs a film about Britain’s most known jailed criminal, Charles Bronson. I liked this film a lot, but it’s a huge departure in tone from Pusher. This is a lyrical, downbeat and sometimes hard to follow folly of a man who doesn’t know who he really is, and is happiest destroying his own life by getting into endless fights and crime sprees. I did not come away from this film loving it, but I did admire the filmmaking. Next up for Nicolas Winding Refn: supposdedly a reboot of Wonder Woman.
Grade: C +
TV's Greatest Surprises (CBS)
A pretty fun trip down memory lane and Jeff Probst did a very nice job hosting. Some of the clips were odd choices to say the least, but all were entertaining on some level.
Grade: B
Taken (HBO)
Liam Neeson is afraid to let his daughter (played by the worst actress of the moment, Maggie Grace (Shannon from Lost), go overseas because as a former government spy Liam has seen it all and doesn’t trust his girl being alone overseas. He relents, and a day later she calls him just as she is being kidnapped for sale in the white-slave prostitution market. He knew it!
Snarky remarks aside, this gets pretty great once Liam is in motion. SPOILER ALERT:
Why doesn’t anyone care about the girl that died?
Grade: B
Jesse James on NIGHTLINE (ABC)
Pathetic. Not only did he start the interview by claiming that he first thought Sandra Bullock was some “Hollywood bitch” before he met her. Then he met her and discovered she really had some smarts in her!
Then he started crying about child abuse he suffered that has since been refuted.
My guess: Jesse James has some nice guy persona that shield the fucking asshole that he really is – and this interview proved what a moron he is.
You had it all, Jesse. But as Elvis Costello and Bob Dylan before him once said” You threw it all away.”
For a tattooed Nazi.
Jesse James: F
Hot Tub Time Machine (DVD)
One of the real surprises in the last few months of onscreen comedy, Hot Tub looks and feels like an 80s movie with a modern sensibility. John Cusack’s presense only intensifies the 80s feel, and Craig Robinson just keeps getting better and funnier in every role. This is not a picture-perfect clever time-travel film that pays so much attention to the minute details of time-travel so much as it pays attention to the emotional core of these characters, and still has quite a few 80s suprises up its sleeve. There are some real belly laughs, Chevy Chase makes a memorable cameo, and the cast gels together wonderfully. The unrated version is what I watched. Completely profane, and I loved it.
Grade: B +
2012 (DVD)
I rented this and blasted the sound, ready to give myself over to a two hour world-ending bonanza. What I got instead was John Cusack running around and a lot of miserable scenes to accompany the destruction. This had to be one of the most poorly plotted and routine action pictures I have ever seen. Every other scene was “just because this man is a janitor, that does not mean he doesn’t deserve to live!” I wanted to love this because there is a great film to be made about the end of the world. This is about as far from it as you can get. The funniest thing about this film is that whenever it’s about to get interesting, the director would cut to something else. There is so much bad in this film, so little good, that I have nothing to really say except avoid this unless you like just-okay special effects.
Grade: D
Nicolas Winding Refn, who made the absolutely brilliant Pusher trilogy, directs a film about Britain’s most known jailed criminal, Charles Bronson. I liked this film a lot, but it’s a huge departure in tone from Pusher. This is a lyrical, downbeat and sometimes hard to follow folly of a man who doesn’t know who he really is, and is happiest destroying his own life by getting into endless fights and crime sprees. I did not come away from this film loving it, but I did admire the filmmaking. Next up for Nicolas Winding Refn: supposdedly a reboot of Wonder Woman.
Grade: C +
TV's Greatest Surprises (CBS)
A pretty fun trip down memory lane and Jeff Probst did a very nice job hosting. Some of the clips were odd choices to say the least, but all were entertaining on some level.
Grade: B
Taken (HBO)
Liam Neeson is afraid to let his daughter (played by the worst actress of the moment, Maggie Grace (Shannon from Lost), go overseas because as a former government spy Liam has seen it all and doesn’t trust his girl being alone overseas. He relents, and a day later she calls him just as she is being kidnapped for sale in the white-slave prostitution market. He knew it!
Snarky remarks aside, this gets pretty great once Liam is in motion. SPOILER ALERT:
Why doesn’t anyone care about the girl that died?
Grade: B
Jesse James on NIGHTLINE (ABC)
Pathetic. Not only did he start the interview by claiming that he first thought Sandra Bullock was some “Hollywood bitch” before he met her. Then he met her and discovered she really had some smarts in her!
Then he started crying about child abuse he suffered that has since been refuted.
My guess: Jesse James has some nice guy persona that shield the fucking asshole that he really is – and this interview proved what a moron he is.
You had it all, Jesse. But as Elvis Costello and Bob Dylan before him once said” You threw it all away.”
For a tattooed Nazi.
Jesse James: F
Hot Tub Time Machine (DVD)
One of the real surprises in the last few months of onscreen comedy, Hot Tub looks and feels like an 80s movie with a modern sensibility. John Cusack’s presense only intensifies the 80s feel, and Craig Robinson just keeps getting better and funnier in every role. This is not a picture-perfect clever time-travel film that pays so much attention to the minute details of time-travel so much as it pays attention to the emotional core of these characters, and still has quite a few 80s suprises up its sleeve. There are some real belly laughs, Chevy Chase makes a memorable cameo, and the cast gels together wonderfully. The unrated version is what I watched. Completely profane, and I loved it.
Grade: B +
2012 (DVD)
I rented this and blasted the sound, ready to give myself over to a two hour world-ending bonanza. What I got instead was John Cusack running around and a lot of miserable scenes to accompany the destruction. This had to be one of the most poorly plotted and routine action pictures I have ever seen. Every other scene was “just because this man is a janitor, that does not mean he doesn’t deserve to live!” I wanted to love this because there is a great film to be made about the end of the world. This is about as far from it as you can get. The funniest thing about this film is that whenever it’s about to get interesting, the director would cut to something else. There is so much bad in this film, so little good, that I have nothing to really say except avoid this unless you like just-okay special effects.
Grade: D
2010/07/06
Cabin Fever
Cabin Fever (IFC)
I finally caught this genuine creepfest of a horror film. The first scary movie directed by Eli Roth, this was the film that caught the eye of Quentin Tarantino who later would lend his name to HOSTEL, the torture-porn masterpiece Roth later wrote and directed. As for this movie, five friends take up in a remote woods cabin for a weekend getaway. What they encounter are very strange rednecks and flesh eating diseases. None of the horror comes from expected places and the film builds genuine tension. If the last 20 minutes get a little haywire, it's still quite a nice balancing act the director keeps for an extended eerie time. Far from a perfect film, this is a pretty terrific creepy rental.
Grade: B -
I finally caught this genuine creepfest of a horror film. The first scary movie directed by Eli Roth, this was the film that caught the eye of Quentin Tarantino who later would lend his name to HOSTEL, the torture-porn masterpiece Roth later wrote and directed. As for this movie, five friends take up in a remote woods cabin for a weekend getaway. What they encounter are very strange rednecks and flesh eating diseases. None of the horror comes from expected places and the film builds genuine tension. If the last 20 minutes get a little haywire, it's still quite a nice balancing act the director keeps for an extended eerie time. Far from a perfect film, this is a pretty terrific creepy rental.
Grade: B -
2010/06/21
Friday The 13th, Orphan & The Last House On The Left remake.
Orphan (Horror (2009) (DVD)
One of the most wretched films I'll ever love. This 2 hour creepfest is a true bad movie masterpiece grounded heavily by a terrific set of performances by the parents, a twisted performance by the lead little girl playing the orphan, an absolutly ludicrous plot that will astonish and inspire some weird sense of awe, and basic good filmaking. As much as I despise the horrifying things that happen to the kids in this, I loved every second of it.
Grade: B +
Friday The 13th (2009 Remake HBO)
Terrible, terrible remake/reboot of the 80s film which spawned more than 10 sequels. The truth is, aside from a 2 minute nonsensical opening which referred to the opening film, there is absolutely nothing original about this. Bad script, bad direction and very bad kills. Worst of all, I can't see what really seperates this from any of the bad sequels, with the one exception that this might be the very worst of them all. BORING!
Grade: F
The Last House On the Left (DVD - 2009 remake)
Another huge surprise. Get the unrated version for all the nastiness in a well-mounted and very well acted film about a gang of hooligans who do the unthinkable to a pair of young women in the woods, then accidentily look for shelter in the home of the parents of one of the missing girls. This is a porn-torture film and particularly grisly in its unedited form, but also glorious in its ideas of retribution. Very well staged and actually improves on the Wes Craven classic from which this is inspired by.
Grade: A
One of the most wretched films I'll ever love. This 2 hour creepfest is a true bad movie masterpiece grounded heavily by a terrific set of performances by the parents, a twisted performance by the lead little girl playing the orphan, an absolutly ludicrous plot that will astonish and inspire some weird sense of awe, and basic good filmaking. As much as I despise the horrifying things that happen to the kids in this, I loved every second of it.
Grade: B +
Friday The 13th (2009 Remake HBO)
Terrible, terrible remake/reboot of the 80s film which spawned more than 10 sequels. The truth is, aside from a 2 minute nonsensical opening which referred to the opening film, there is absolutely nothing original about this. Bad script, bad direction and very bad kills. Worst of all, I can't see what really seperates this from any of the bad sequels, with the one exception that this might be the very worst of them all. BORING!
Grade: F
The Last House On the Left (DVD - 2009 remake)
Another huge surprise. Get the unrated version for all the nastiness in a well-mounted and very well acted film about a gang of hooligans who do the unthinkable to a pair of young women in the woods, then accidentily look for shelter in the home of the parents of one of the missing girls. This is a porn-torture film and particularly grisly in its unedited form, but also glorious in its ideas of retribution. Very well staged and actually improves on the Wes Craven classic from which this is inspired by.
Grade: A
2010/06/15
The Dead Set, Breaking Bad, Confessions of a Superhero
The Simpsons (Fox)
I know this has not been a great season, but I recently caught the episode where Homer and Chief Wiggum get caught up in a bromance. Loved it. Wish the rest of the season was like that. More on The Simpsons and Sunday night on Fox coming.
The Dead Set (BBC)
A great 5 part half hour series from the BBC. It begins as a behind the scenes look at yet another variation of Big Brother. Only then Zombies come. And the cameras stay on. As weird as this sounds, it was terrific.
Grade: A -
Confessions Of A Superhero (IFC)
One of my recent favorite documentaries, Confessions tells the story about the superheroes of Hollywood Blvd. The wanna-be actors (I say that lovingly) who dress up as super heroes and go out on Hollywood Blvd. and shill for money by taking pics with tourists. While I kind of liked the guy that played Superman, fell in crazy love with the bombshell, albeit delusional gal who plays Wonder Woman, I was completely disturbed by the guy that dons the Batman outfit. Listening to him in his Batman suit describing a murder he might have committed - it doesn't get more surreal than that.
Grade: A
Breaking Bad (2nd season DVD)
Still going through, still LOVING this.
I know this has not been a great season, but I recently caught the episode where Homer and Chief Wiggum get caught up in a bromance. Loved it. Wish the rest of the season was like that. More on The Simpsons and Sunday night on Fox coming.
The Dead Set (BBC)
A great 5 part half hour series from the BBC. It begins as a behind the scenes look at yet another variation of Big Brother. Only then Zombies come. And the cameras stay on. As weird as this sounds, it was terrific.
Grade: A -
Confessions Of A Superhero (IFC)
One of my recent favorite documentaries, Confessions tells the story about the superheroes of Hollywood Blvd. The wanna-be actors (I say that lovingly) who dress up as super heroes and go out on Hollywood Blvd. and shill for money by taking pics with tourists. While I kind of liked the guy that played Superman, fell in crazy love with the bombshell, albeit delusional gal who plays Wonder Woman, I was completely disturbed by the guy that dons the Batman outfit. Listening to him in his Batman suit describing a murder he might have committed - it doesn't get more surreal than that.
Grade: A
Breaking Bad (2nd season DVD)
Still going through, still LOVING this.
2010/06/07
True Beauty, Irene In Time, The Bachelorette, Breaking Bad.
True Beauty (ABC)
A new show in which the gorgeous young contestants think that they're on some kind of beauty/reality show. But there are hidden cameras and they are really being tested on their "inner beauty." I love the idea of this show, and its fun to watch beautiful people be total assholes, but something about the setup keeps this from really testing these people. They end up faced with these weird setups where you don't even blame them for doing the wrong thing. Making this a bit more interesting is the presence of Beth O., also known as the wife of Howard Stern. She's beautiful and fun and seems unusually nice, and her presence here is quite a welcome relief from the usual TV stiff. I like this show, but I think by the end it gets kind of hokey. At least it did last season.
Grade: B -
Irene In Time (Drama 2009 DVD)
I LOVE Henry Jaglom movies. Last Summer In The Hamptons is one of my very favorite films. That said, this one is a total failure. It's about these women and their daddy issues, but every conversation is an emotional catharsis, none of the improv seems remotely believable, and the lead actress gives a twitchy, disturbing performance that is hard to watch.
Grade: D
The Bachelorette (ABC)
I find her completely annoying and I loved the initial weirdness with the Weatherman and that older, aggressive angry guy. But now that he's gone, it's already a bit ho-hum. And the Bachelorette herself is a real bore.
Grade: C
Starting Out In The Evening (HBO)
Frank Langella is a famous author and Lauren Ambrose is a pretty young student doing a paper on him. Langella is solid as a rock here, but its a badly overly written role, with every writer cliché in the book present. Lauren is even more annoying here than in 6 FEET UNDER. She plays this girl like she's Woodward in All The President's Men. It's a really badly observed acting job. There is also some hokum involving some ludicrous and boring plotline about Langella's daughter, and by the time this thing rolls around to the end...it's not good. Only worth it if you are a Frank Langella completist, and he is good here but un-served by the production.
Grade: D +
Breaking Bad (2nd season DVD)
I'm in the middle and will report back once I'm finished, but so far, so great.
A new show in which the gorgeous young contestants think that they're on some kind of beauty/reality show. But there are hidden cameras and they are really being tested on their "inner beauty." I love the idea of this show, and its fun to watch beautiful people be total assholes, but something about the setup keeps this from really testing these people. They end up faced with these weird setups where you don't even blame them for doing the wrong thing. Making this a bit more interesting is the presence of Beth O., also known as the wife of Howard Stern. She's beautiful and fun and seems unusually nice, and her presence here is quite a welcome relief from the usual TV stiff. I like this show, but I think by the end it gets kind of hokey. At least it did last season.
Grade: B -
Irene In Time (Drama 2009 DVD)
I LOVE Henry Jaglom movies. Last Summer In The Hamptons is one of my very favorite films. That said, this one is a total failure. It's about these women and their daddy issues, but every conversation is an emotional catharsis, none of the improv seems remotely believable, and the lead actress gives a twitchy, disturbing performance that is hard to watch.
Grade: D
The Bachelorette (ABC)
I find her completely annoying and I loved the initial weirdness with the Weatherman and that older, aggressive angry guy. But now that he's gone, it's already a bit ho-hum. And the Bachelorette herself is a real bore.
Grade: C
Starting Out In The Evening (HBO)
Frank Langella is a famous author and Lauren Ambrose is a pretty young student doing a paper on him. Langella is solid as a rock here, but its a badly overly written role, with every writer cliché in the book present. Lauren is even more annoying here than in 6 FEET UNDER. She plays this girl like she's Woodward in All The President's Men. It's a really badly observed acting job. There is also some hokum involving some ludicrous and boring plotline about Langella's daughter, and by the time this thing rolls around to the end...it's not good. Only worth it if you are a Frank Langella completist, and he is good here but un-served by the production.
Grade: D +
Breaking Bad (2nd season DVD)
I'm in the middle and will report back once I'm finished, but so far, so great.
2010/05/28
New Reviews.
Jimmy Kimmel killed on a very entertaining HOLLYWOOD SALUTES MATT DAMON.
HOUSE, MD (Fox) (Season Finale)
Best. Season Finale. Ever.
Huddy!
HIGH LIFE (DVD)
I've never even heard of this movie but ended up watching it last week. Timothy Olyphant stars in this C-grade heist movie elevated mightily by Olyphant's performance as a junkie thief.
Grade: C +
TWO BROTHERS (DVD)
If you haven't seen this film about two tigers seperated at birth, it's a gem.
Grade: A
BUBBA THE LOVE SPONGE: RAW & UNCUT Vol. 1 (DVD)
Sort of the southern-fried version of Stern, without Howard's wit or charm. Just an upped anti on grossness. Kind of like a slightly dirtier Jack-Ass. This is some of his "best" bits from his radio show. Some of it is funny, some tedious, and most too racy to describe. I like Bubba, but I only have room in my heart for one radio guy.
Grade: B -
UNAMI BURGER (La Brea Avenue)
Best burger I have ever had. It's about 8 bucks a burger and about as good as it gets. I'll go so far to say that in a lot of ways, it redefines what you want in a hamburger. The menu has 100 burgers listed, but I would go for the original.
Grade: A
24 (Fox) Season Finale
I love 24. Completely. They've had some off seasons, but this one caught fire once they decided it was the last network run. From the time of Hassan's death, to the shooting at Jack's apt., to Jack's IRON MAN suit and abduction of the ex-president brilliantly played by Gregory Itzkin, this has been an insanely tense and exciting season. Despite the Dana insanity and some despite Freddie Prinze Jr.'s bad New York accent. Michael Madson did a great turn guest-starring, and this thing was on fire right up until...the final hour. Sorry, no spoilers but taking your man out of mostly all the action right at the top and pivoting the final hour on Cherry Jones' (who was superb) President...didn't feel right. It was frustrating to not have Jack driving the final hour. And the last few seconds was as cheesy as it gets. That said, the conversation with both the President and Chloe were great and cathartic, and this was one of the most kick-ass shows to ever be on television. It will be missed.
Final season grade: B +
Overal grade: A
AMERCAN IDOL (Season Finale) Fox
I could care less about this season's Idols. Really. But the final episodes had Simon leaving and presented Paula Abdul in a return visit to the show. She looked great and her taped bit was heartfelt. But that live performance - what a fucking doozy. Look it up on YouTube under "awkward." Boy can she not speak. And the Peter Cetera-less Chicago segment, oh well. Simon will be missed and I suspect I will migrate to the new show, as the idea of Randy and Ellen leaves me cold. Ellen by the way, was fucking horrible.
DAMAGES (F/X)
I never reviewed the finale, but this was a top-notch season and a great, if really overstuffed finale. I'm glad that they found a way to fund a 4th season.
Grade: A
DOWN IN THE VALLEY (DVD)
Some unwatchable mess about some porn thing in the valley. Yuck.
Grade: F
HOUSE, MD (Fox) (Season Finale)
Best. Season Finale. Ever.
Huddy!
HIGH LIFE (DVD)
I've never even heard of this movie but ended up watching it last week. Timothy Olyphant stars in this C-grade heist movie elevated mightily by Olyphant's performance as a junkie thief.
Grade: C +
TWO BROTHERS (DVD)
If you haven't seen this film about two tigers seperated at birth, it's a gem.
Grade: A
BUBBA THE LOVE SPONGE: RAW & UNCUT Vol. 1 (DVD)
Sort of the southern-fried version of Stern, without Howard's wit or charm. Just an upped anti on grossness. Kind of like a slightly dirtier Jack-Ass. This is some of his "best" bits from his radio show. Some of it is funny, some tedious, and most too racy to describe. I like Bubba, but I only have room in my heart for one radio guy.
Grade: B -
UNAMI BURGER (La Brea Avenue)
Best burger I have ever had. It's about 8 bucks a burger and about as good as it gets. I'll go so far to say that in a lot of ways, it redefines what you want in a hamburger. The menu has 100 burgers listed, but I would go for the original.
Grade: A
24 (Fox) Season Finale
I love 24. Completely. They've had some off seasons, but this one caught fire once they decided it was the last network run. From the time of Hassan's death, to the shooting at Jack's apt., to Jack's IRON MAN suit and abduction of the ex-president brilliantly played by Gregory Itzkin, this has been an insanely tense and exciting season. Despite the Dana insanity and some despite Freddie Prinze Jr.'s bad New York accent. Michael Madson did a great turn guest-starring, and this thing was on fire right up until...the final hour. Sorry, no spoilers but taking your man out of mostly all the action right at the top and pivoting the final hour on Cherry Jones' (who was superb) President...didn't feel right. It was frustrating to not have Jack driving the final hour. And the last few seconds was as cheesy as it gets. That said, the conversation with both the President and Chloe were great and cathartic, and this was one of the most kick-ass shows to ever be on television. It will be missed.
Final season grade: B +
Overal grade: A
AMERCAN IDOL (Season Finale) Fox
I could care less about this season's Idols. Really. But the final episodes had Simon leaving and presented Paula Abdul in a return visit to the show. She looked great and her taped bit was heartfelt. But that live performance - what a fucking doozy. Look it up on YouTube under "awkward." Boy can she not speak. And the Peter Cetera-less Chicago segment, oh well. Simon will be missed and I suspect I will migrate to the new show, as the idea of Randy and Ellen leaves me cold. Ellen by the way, was fucking horrible.
DAMAGES (F/X)
I never reviewed the finale, but this was a top-notch season and a great, if really overstuffed finale. I'm glad that they found a way to fund a 4th season.
Grade: A
DOWN IN THE VALLEY (DVD)
Some unwatchable mess about some porn thing in the valley. Yuck.
Grade: F
2010/05/24
The end of LOST! (MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD) Season Finale of CELEB APPRENTICE (Winner revealed in review)
LOST (ABC) (Final Episode)
I don't have much to say. On the ho-hum side. I was expecting and hoping for something more. The show seems to have satisfied some viewers and really aliented another batch. I'm somewhere in between. The 2 1/2 hour finale didn't really bother with most of the nagging questions posted by long time Lost addicts, like the Dharma Initiative, why the women were losing their babies, etc. Instead focusing on a silly fight between the Locke Monster and Jack. I guess I was okay with the sideways world being a sort of purgatory, but the episode actually begged more questions than it answered. Was the island real at all? Was the entire thing a dream? Or just the sideways world part? Is Ben choosing to be a ghost the rest of his life? I mean - I'm not kidding. There are literally hundreds of questions I have, but I'm sure they're all explainable. Did this have an emotionally satisfying ending? I guess it did. The Sopranos might've left a lot of loose ends, but for the most part, you knew where the central relationships stood. This was like...I don't know. I had settled in for a fantastic night of mind-bending television and thought this was one of the weaker episodes in a way than many I'd seen before it. It relied so heavily on the super-natural that I'm not sure I quite connected with it. I am a TV geek and sure I could do 9 pages on this, but the finale left me so cold, I think I'm just kind of over it.
Grade: I have no idea. I don't know what to make of it. I liked the series so much for the most part, I guess in time I might have a different take on the finale. For now, I'm kind of frustrated with it. I suppose in some ways it makes sense even though the show broke most of the rules it had set up itself....and the last shots suggested that there was no Island life, yet someone said that you saw the shelters they had built....so, again. I guess my grade is just a sigh and a shrug.
That said, I loved a lot of what I saw these last few seasons, and I think sometimes the momementum and forward motion of a show is far better than its conclusion. At no point would I suggest this was bad like the Seinfeld finale (the worst of all time perhaps) but this was more of a big fat mediocre disappointment. I keep saying I'm done and writing more, because I think this one of those debates best left in cyberspace to the real Lost-heads. For me, as someone who has seen every episode, I was hoping for something that moved me and blew my mind, I didn't get that here, but there was some closure and the dog lived. So I guess...I'm just going to stop. I really don't know what to say. I just know this, great final episodes make you re-evaluate a series and want to go back and watch the whole thing again. The Sopranos did that. Cheers did that. Prison Break did such a good finale that it redeemed any negativity about the final season. That Lost would enter that group of fine endings seemed a foregone conclusion.
It's funny, the other night when Evangaline Lilly went on Letterman the other night, Letterman said the only ending that would make him happy would be one in which the whole thing was declared a dream. An appalled Lilly (who also announced she doesn't watch tv - what an intellectual!) said "That is the least imaginative thing I've ever heard." Was she trying to send a message to her producers, or was she watching a different show?
Either way, Lost provided us with years of good television, and some of the hours were ridiculously good. I just think the final batch of episodes being a match between a smoke monster (who you can apparently kill by throwing him on a rock) and Jack, because they were fighting over...a light in the island under the rocks I think....I don't know.
Moving on.
UPDATE: I wrote that last night in the heat of dissapointment. Now that the ending has sunk in somewhat, I'm much more forgiving and started looking at Lost as a whole series instead of one episode.
That said, Lost really was a breathrough network show. There may never be anything again like it, and while I might not have liked all the choices they ultimately made, I still think the ambition here is not to be ignored and will probably never be duplicated. The truth was, I think we all wanted an emotional ending and not something caught up in answering every question posed along the way. I'm not sure I'm really...moved by the answer, and I have some burning questions I would like answered that I felt could've been resolved last night, but I wonder with this final piece of the puzzle how Lost will eventually settle in my mind.
I'm withholding a final grade till I get a chance to see it again.
THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (ABC)
This was a pretty good year. We all know who won and if you don't, you can look it up. Sufice it to say that I thought while the wrong person won, it was clearly a case of the popular thing happening. It seems like the audience wrote the ending. And what the fuck was Cyndi Lauper singing? Could she have picked anything more obscure? Brett was fantastic on the show, but I don't think Holly Robinson could've been beat by anything but Brett becoming a national hero, which is exactly what happened. It was no accident that Snapple gave both winners the exact amount of money.
Grade: B
I don't have much to say. On the ho-hum side. I was expecting and hoping for something more. The show seems to have satisfied some viewers and really aliented another batch. I'm somewhere in between. The 2 1/2 hour finale didn't really bother with most of the nagging questions posted by long time Lost addicts, like the Dharma Initiative, why the women were losing their babies, etc. Instead focusing on a silly fight between the Locke Monster and Jack. I guess I was okay with the sideways world being a sort of purgatory, but the episode actually begged more questions than it answered. Was the island real at all? Was the entire thing a dream? Or just the sideways world part? Is Ben choosing to be a ghost the rest of his life? I mean - I'm not kidding. There are literally hundreds of questions I have, but I'm sure they're all explainable. Did this have an emotionally satisfying ending? I guess it did. The Sopranos might've left a lot of loose ends, but for the most part, you knew where the central relationships stood. This was like...I don't know. I had settled in for a fantastic night of mind-bending television and thought this was one of the weaker episodes in a way than many I'd seen before it. It relied so heavily on the super-natural that I'm not sure I quite connected with it. I am a TV geek and sure I could do 9 pages on this, but the finale left me so cold, I think I'm just kind of over it.
Grade: I have no idea. I don't know what to make of it. I liked the series so much for the most part, I guess in time I might have a different take on the finale. For now, I'm kind of frustrated with it. I suppose in some ways it makes sense even though the show broke most of the rules it had set up itself....and the last shots suggested that there was no Island life, yet someone said that you saw the shelters they had built....so, again. I guess my grade is just a sigh and a shrug.
That said, I loved a lot of what I saw these last few seasons, and I think sometimes the momementum and forward motion of a show is far better than its conclusion. At no point would I suggest this was bad like the Seinfeld finale (the worst of all time perhaps) but this was more of a big fat mediocre disappointment. I keep saying I'm done and writing more, because I think this one of those debates best left in cyberspace to the real Lost-heads. For me, as someone who has seen every episode, I was hoping for something that moved me and blew my mind, I didn't get that here, but there was some closure and the dog lived. So I guess...I'm just going to stop. I really don't know what to say. I just know this, great final episodes make you re-evaluate a series and want to go back and watch the whole thing again. The Sopranos did that. Cheers did that. Prison Break did such a good finale that it redeemed any negativity about the final season. That Lost would enter that group of fine endings seemed a foregone conclusion.
It's funny, the other night when Evangaline Lilly went on Letterman the other night, Letterman said the only ending that would make him happy would be one in which the whole thing was declared a dream. An appalled Lilly (who also announced she doesn't watch tv - what an intellectual!) said "That is the least imaginative thing I've ever heard." Was she trying to send a message to her producers, or was she watching a different show?
Either way, Lost provided us with years of good television, and some of the hours were ridiculously good. I just think the final batch of episodes being a match between a smoke monster (who you can apparently kill by throwing him on a rock) and Jack, because they were fighting over...a light in the island under the rocks I think....I don't know.
Moving on.
UPDATE: I wrote that last night in the heat of dissapointment. Now that the ending has sunk in somewhat, I'm much more forgiving and started looking at Lost as a whole series instead of one episode.
That said, Lost really was a breathrough network show. There may never be anything again like it, and while I might not have liked all the choices they ultimately made, I still think the ambition here is not to be ignored and will probably never be duplicated. The truth was, I think we all wanted an emotional ending and not something caught up in answering every question posed along the way. I'm not sure I'm really...moved by the answer, and I have some burning questions I would like answered that I felt could've been resolved last night, but I wonder with this final piece of the puzzle how Lost will eventually settle in my mind.
I'm withholding a final grade till I get a chance to see it again.
THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (ABC)
This was a pretty good year. We all know who won and if you don't, you can look it up. Sufice it to say that I thought while the wrong person won, it was clearly a case of the popular thing happening. It seems like the audience wrote the ending. And what the fuck was Cyndi Lauper singing? Could she have picked anything more obscure? Brett was fantastic on the show, but I don't think Holly Robinson could've been beat by anything but Brett becoming a national hero, which is exactly what happened. It was no accident that Snapple gave both winners the exact amount of money.
Grade: B
2010/05/18
Kick ass! 24: The end is coming.
KICK ASS (In Theaters)
Part superhero mythos, part Superbad, and lots of Tarantino inspired "Kill Bill" mayhem, this is a truly super-violent display of both tone and film-making bravado. The hero of this, Kick-Ass, is an average teenager who just wants to do something amazing. There are so many spoilers here that I don't want to give too much away. I'll leave it at this - the actors here are top notch. Particularly the kids. And especially that little girl who plays Nicholas Cage's (Cage is excellent here) daughter. I kind of loved this movie, even though while it presented its superheroes in somewhat realistic light, the bad guys and scenarios were a lot more by-the-book than you'd expect. I kind of need to see a sequel. (Although I don't quite know if this made enough money to warrant one.)
Grade: B +
24 (Fox)
With all the hype surrounding the LOST finale, not enough attention has been paid to the closing out of one of our greatest modern action hours, 24. No spoilers here, but the last 4 or 5 eps have been truly dazzling and is serving as a masterfully satisfying finish to what is sure to become a great film franchise. Jack has never been more ruthless and haunted. And the twists keep piling up. I fucking love it.
Grade: A
FRAT HOUSE (HBO DOC)
This is a banned docu that I got a chance to see (a friend had the original tape from HBO - I think it aired once.) Let me save you all the trouble. It is good filmmaking. Very good. I just don't think you're going to see anything much here that will surprise you. People are aware of just how crazy pledging a frat can be, and there is nothing here that calls for public outcry. Still pretty fun if you haven't seen it, and if you have no idea what goes on in these pledge weeks, by all means seek this out. But honestly, this was just okay.
Grade: C
DO I DRINK TOO MUCH (BBC DOC)
A fascinating docu by a guy who always had seen himself as a "regular" drinker. He starts to go to doctors to see what the alcohol is doing to him. He takes part in a variety of tests administered in offices to see what effects alcohol have on him. This is probably easy to find on the internet, and if you ever wondered about the effects of alcohol, seek this out.
Grade: B
The Breathing Technique (A Magazine)
Sorry. Can't remember the magazine, but I read about this technique and actually tried it - and it actually worked! The next time you're feeling stressed out and anxiety is over-taking you, try this: put your thumb lightly under your right nostril, and then breathe in through your left nostril deeply 30 times. You may not make it all the way to 30, but think about the process while it's happening and I swear, there are all kinds of reasons why this happens, but I'mn not a doctor and I don't even remember where I read about this. But - this will actually give you a physiological change that will mellow you the fuck out!
Grade: A
30 ROCK (NBC)
Jack choosing between Julianne Moore and Avery is ridiculous. Julianne Moore is one of my all time favorite actresses. But this is not a good role for her, the accent is truly beyond cheesy or cute, and Avery is every man's fantasy and the actress playing her is hilarious. So give us a break. And I still really like this show, even if its gotten too surreal for its own good.
WHITE POWER (DOCUMENTARY)
Another BBC docu on a subject and frankly, all these docs on white power are usually about the same. Very grim, depressing and rather boring subject matter. The skinheads or nazis or whoever is talking is usually really fucking super size dumb. We get it. It's not good to be a nazi. Point taken.
Grade: D
PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (DVD)
I recently saw this again on DVD just to catch the "alternate endings." There are no extras here. Just a chilling film perfect for a rental and of the 3 existing endings (one which is not on the dvd) I have no idea which I prefer. I think I wish they never showed the alternate endings so I can just have one idea of what happened. If you see this, stick with one or the other, but looking at the other endings exposes the whole docu feel of this subtle creep fest.
Grade: B +
PORT OF CALL: THE BAD LT. (DVD)
This was one of my favorites of the year. I just looked at the DVD and am sad to report there are NO extras whatsoever. Still a great movie.
Grade: A
Part superhero mythos, part Superbad, and lots of Tarantino inspired "Kill Bill" mayhem, this is a truly super-violent display of both tone and film-making bravado. The hero of this, Kick-Ass, is an average teenager who just wants to do something amazing. There are so many spoilers here that I don't want to give too much away. I'll leave it at this - the actors here are top notch. Particularly the kids. And especially that little girl who plays Nicholas Cage's (Cage is excellent here) daughter. I kind of loved this movie, even though while it presented its superheroes in somewhat realistic light, the bad guys and scenarios were a lot more by-the-book than you'd expect. I kind of need to see a sequel. (Although I don't quite know if this made enough money to warrant one.)
Grade: B +
24 (Fox)
With all the hype surrounding the LOST finale, not enough attention has been paid to the closing out of one of our greatest modern action hours, 24. No spoilers here, but the last 4 or 5 eps have been truly dazzling and is serving as a masterfully satisfying finish to what is sure to become a great film franchise. Jack has never been more ruthless and haunted. And the twists keep piling up. I fucking love it.
Grade: A
FRAT HOUSE (HBO DOC)
This is a banned docu that I got a chance to see (a friend had the original tape from HBO - I think it aired once.) Let me save you all the trouble. It is good filmmaking. Very good. I just don't think you're going to see anything much here that will surprise you. People are aware of just how crazy pledging a frat can be, and there is nothing here that calls for public outcry. Still pretty fun if you haven't seen it, and if you have no idea what goes on in these pledge weeks, by all means seek this out. But honestly, this was just okay.
Grade: C
DO I DRINK TOO MUCH (BBC DOC)
A fascinating docu by a guy who always had seen himself as a "regular" drinker. He starts to go to doctors to see what the alcohol is doing to him. He takes part in a variety of tests administered in offices to see what effects alcohol have on him. This is probably easy to find on the internet, and if you ever wondered about the effects of alcohol, seek this out.
Grade: B
The Breathing Technique (A Magazine)
Sorry. Can't remember the magazine, but I read about this technique and actually tried it - and it actually worked! The next time you're feeling stressed out and anxiety is over-taking you, try this: put your thumb lightly under your right nostril, and then breathe in through your left nostril deeply 30 times. You may not make it all the way to 30, but think about the process while it's happening and I swear, there are all kinds of reasons why this happens, but I'mn not a doctor and I don't even remember where I read about this. But - this will actually give you a physiological change that will mellow you the fuck out!
Grade: A
30 ROCK (NBC)
Jack choosing between Julianne Moore and Avery is ridiculous. Julianne Moore is one of my all time favorite actresses. But this is not a good role for her, the accent is truly beyond cheesy or cute, and Avery is every man's fantasy and the actress playing her is hilarious. So give us a break. And I still really like this show, even if its gotten too surreal for its own good.
WHITE POWER (DOCUMENTARY)
Another BBC docu on a subject and frankly, all these docs on white power are usually about the same. Very grim, depressing and rather boring subject matter. The skinheads or nazis or whoever is talking is usually really fucking super size dumb. We get it. It's not good to be a nazi. Point taken.
Grade: D
PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (DVD)
I recently saw this again on DVD just to catch the "alternate endings." There are no extras here. Just a chilling film perfect for a rental and of the 3 existing endings (one which is not on the dvd) I have no idea which I prefer. I think I wish they never showed the alternate endings so I can just have one idea of what happened. If you see this, stick with one or the other, but looking at the other endings exposes the whole docu feel of this subtle creep fest.
Grade: B +
PORT OF CALL: THE BAD LT. (DVD)
This was one of my favorites of the year. I just looked at the DVD and am sad to report there are NO extras whatsoever. Still a great movie.
Grade: A
2010/05/10
Howard Stern, 24, and Nick Santora (Sopranos, Prison Break) interview.
The Howard Stern Radio Show (Sirius Satellite Radio)
Has been better than ever. Without the sorely missed Artie, Howard has somehow brought the show to another level, and he and Robin are now center stage again. It's certainly a different show from the one he and Artie were doing, but the last few weeks of shows have been as good as they've ever been. The Willie Nelson interview was a standout. The couple that won the million bucks was also superb. If only Fred would talk a bit more and am I the only one that thinks bringing back Jackie Martling would not be the worst thing to ever happen?
Conan O'Brien was kind of great on 60 MINUTES.
FACES (DVD)
I love John Casavetes films. I watched over an hour of this and needed aspirin. I'm sure at the time (the 60s) this made a lot of sense. I didn't get it.
SNL: Betty White (NBC)
Not only did Betty White come through, but SNL came through with one of its better episodes of the season. Bringing back a lot of the past female players was a great idea, but Betty stole the show. Truly.
Grade: A
FAMILY GUY 150th (Fox)
A full half hour of just Stewie and Brian in a locked vault. No cutaways, no gimicks, almost like a 28 minute stage play. That said, some of this was as absolutely profane and vile as the show ever gets. I loved every minute of it. I hope this runs forever. The dance numbers that followed were fun, but that original episode was a real winner.
Grade: A
24 (Fox)
The clock is ticking and with every episode, this gains more and more momentum. What started out as routine as become one of the best seasons of the entire run. This last episode that had Jack deciding on Dana's fate was completely gripping and
suprising. The stuff between Jack and Chloe is superb and I even have to say - Freddie Prinze Jr. is terrific in this. Wow, I said it.
Grade: A
MEET NICK SANTORA:
Nick Santora is a writer who’s written some of this blog’s favorite subjects. His first produced work was the great 4th season Sopranos episode “Watching too much television” which had Tony & Co. subverting HUD funds and ended with Tony giving Assemblyman Zelman a beat down with his belt for having the audacity to date Tony’s ex-girlfriend. It was one of the great 4th season episodes. From there Nick went on to write and produce The Guardian and Law & Order. He also created and executive produced the reality show Beauty & The Geek. He then began on season 1 of one of this blog’s favorite all time shows “Prison Break” and stayed on all the way through all four seasons. He even penned the series swan song “The Final Break.”
Along the way he wrote a National best-selling novel and – oh yeah – he used to be a lawyer in Brooklyn. He’s also a great guy and a friend of mine, so I asked him if he wouldn’t mind me barraging him with questions about his life and career. The following is part one of a four part interview. I caught up with Nick as he was getting lost between the 101 and 405 trying to get to Burbank to do a final mix on the edit of his brand new pilot “Breakout Kings” which he co-created with Prison Break showrunner, Matt Olmstead.
These are heady times for Nick as he awaits word from Fox over his pilot, but despite the stress and anxiety of prepping a pilot, Nick was nice enough to grant these interviews and I thought the shows he worked on were of particular interest to readers of this blog:
NICK SANTORA INTERVIEW PART I
Digital Couch: So, where do we start? Sly Stallone said that before Rocky, he was as low as one could be in this business and you kind of weren’t even in the business when you started. Can you take us through that as best you can?
Nick: I was a lawyer in Manhattan. I worked for Sullivan and Cromwell, one of the most prominent law firms in the world. I was doing so much paper pushing I knew I’d never get into a courtroom and actually litigate, so I switched my place of business, and went from a huge high-end firm to a firm with five lawyers literally located above a pizza place in Brooklyn. I went from dealing with Fortune 500 companies to guys who got hurt on construction sites or slipped and fell in supermarkets.
On the whole, I was a very unhappy person. I was in my mid-20s, I was a lawyer, and by the time I got to my late 20s and saw 30 approaching I was miserable. My wife one morning comes out of the bathroom - she saw me in my boxers and wearing a shirt sitting on the edge of the bed, not getting ready for work – I had been there for an hour. I looked at her and said “it’ll get better.” I was talking about my depression over this existence I had chosen and felt stuck in. My wife answered “it better.”
The truth is, I was in a constant cloud of misery. I was looking down the barrel of 30 more years of practicing law, which is the last thing I wanted to do. I wanted to write.
When I was 6 years old, I wrote a poem and I remember what it felt like to put words together and see how they “fit” in place…to me that was an electrifying experience and to this day I remember that poem:
I Would Like To Be An Orange
By Nick Santora (at 6 years old)
I would like to be an orange.
To have some orange skin.
I would like to be an orange.
To have a lovely grin.
I would like to be an orange.
To be washed and to be dried.
I’m always an orange.
I’m an orange inside.
DC: Nick, that was beautiful.
Nick: Dude, I don’t even like fucking oranges. But it started the idea of putting words together for me. I remember it so well because I still get that feeling everyday where you think you pick the right word…it’s a chemical release in my brain. It feels like you’re high – a natural high. All through my life I would write stories. Back when I was dating my wife and I was broke, (Law School and the loans added up to being poor) I would write novellas for her as gifts. But even though I wanted to write, I felt that I owed my family a law degree since they had put up the funds to get me a very expensive education. In fact, I was the first male Santora to graduate college.
DC: Sounds great, but also sounds like a bit of a burden.
Nick: A heavy burden. Anyway, so now I’m in law for a living, I’m hating it and miserable and I felt like she’d (my wife) eventually catch my misery and leave me because I’m such a sad-sack bastard. And I wouldn’t blame her.
A few days later, I’m in Manhattan and I’m covering a few motions that are being dealt with at he same time. I’m running from courthouse to courthouse. I’m worried that one of my cases would get marked off the court calendar because maybe I’d be late. And while I’m running , this blind woman on the corner says “would somebody help me cross the street?” So, I blow past this woman like she’s a statue, I’m half-way across the street…now this becomes a major moment in my life. Here I am, running around, literally ignoring a disabled person who’s asking for help to get to a job I fucking hate. I wondered what my mom would think if she could see me right now? So go back, grab the woman, and she keeps thanking me and I’m thinking “I have to make a change.”
My wife and I were planning a vacation. I asked her if I could take the last week of my time off and just stay home and try my hand at writing a screenplay. My wife said “Absolutely! Stop talking about it and finally write something.”
So I had that last week off. Took out my wife to dinner that Friday night, went to bed early, then Saturday morning, I sat down at our shitty kitchen table and really shitty computer in our completely shitty apartment, and I started to write. I started Saturday morning and finished around midnight the next Sunday. Nine straight days of writing and I finished a script called “Slip & Fall.”
I was so naïve. I figured I finished a script, now some agent’s going to want to represent me. See, the thing is, in California, everyone has a script. From the taxi driver to the doorman to the executives, everybody has a script. New York is a little different (at the time.) Back then in New York, nobody wrote screenplays at that time. So I went online thinking I’ll search for an agent. I typed in “screenplay agent.” What came up was a screenplay competition that had agents showing up at it.
There was also a film festival portion, and then a competition for unproduced screenplays. The directions on the contest were not to send a script but rather a synopsis. So I did. A few days later I got a call saying they’d like to read the script. But the guy from the contest said “we get hundreds and we only pick about 20 or so.” So I send it and figure that’s the end of it.
A few weeks later, I get a call saying “you’re in the competition.” I’m such a rube, I go out to Nordstroms with my wife and buy a new suit and tie that I couldn’t afford, so I can make a spiffy showing at the competition. I get there, all the other writers are dressed like slobs and now because of my suit, they think I’m an agent. So I’m getting scripts handed to me by writers, I’m getting cornered by writers, but eventually I get to pitch the judges my script and by the time I realized what was going on I realized I had somehow blown this opportunity to mix it up with agents all over this fucking suit I had worn.
A few weeks later, I’m alone in the office working on a motion and my phone rings. It’s the film festival. “Congats, we’re going to announce tomorrow that you won best screenplay.” I say “great, what do I win?” The person says to me “You win your life is going to change.”
Sure enough, I started getting calls from agencies. I signed with United Talent Agency and within a few months they got me a job writing for a show that had a 13 episode script order for a show called AT END OF DAY which was an original series for A&E. I remember the day I was supposed to start writing it. September 11, 2001.
The guy who hired me, the showrunner, Mark Rosner, called and said “you don’t have to worry. I can find someone else. I don’t expect you to finish this script with what’s going on in New York.” My response was “I want to do this more than ever.” The tragedy pointed out that any day could be your last, and I wanted this. The show didn’t get picked up, but that script did two things for me, it showed my agents that I could do the job and got me into the Writer’s Guild.
The showrunner called my agent and said “he did a great job! You should work for this guy.” A few months later I’m still doing law, and the agents call and say I have to take a meeting. I say “I can’t just pick up and take off to LA anytime there’s a possible job.” The agent said “Trust me, you want to take this meeting, and it’s in New York.”
I though a minute and said “It’s not…”
My agent replied “Yes, the meeting is with David Chase. The show is The Sopranos.”
To be continued:
Has been better than ever. Without the sorely missed Artie, Howard has somehow brought the show to another level, and he and Robin are now center stage again. It's certainly a different show from the one he and Artie were doing, but the last few weeks of shows have been as good as they've ever been. The Willie Nelson interview was a standout. The couple that won the million bucks was also superb. If only Fred would talk a bit more and am I the only one that thinks bringing back Jackie Martling would not be the worst thing to ever happen?
Conan O'Brien was kind of great on 60 MINUTES.
FACES (DVD)
I love John Casavetes films. I watched over an hour of this and needed aspirin. I'm sure at the time (the 60s) this made a lot of sense. I didn't get it.
SNL: Betty White (NBC)
Not only did Betty White come through, but SNL came through with one of its better episodes of the season. Bringing back a lot of the past female players was a great idea, but Betty stole the show. Truly.
Grade: A
FAMILY GUY 150th (Fox)
A full half hour of just Stewie and Brian in a locked vault. No cutaways, no gimicks, almost like a 28 minute stage play. That said, some of this was as absolutely profane and vile as the show ever gets. I loved every minute of it. I hope this runs forever. The dance numbers that followed were fun, but that original episode was a real winner.
Grade: A
24 (Fox)
The clock is ticking and with every episode, this gains more and more momentum. What started out as routine as become one of the best seasons of the entire run. This last episode that had Jack deciding on Dana's fate was completely gripping and
suprising. The stuff between Jack and Chloe is superb and I even have to say - Freddie Prinze Jr. is terrific in this. Wow, I said it.
Grade: A
MEET NICK SANTORA:
Nick Santora is a writer who’s written some of this blog’s favorite subjects. His first produced work was the great 4th season Sopranos episode “Watching too much television” which had Tony & Co. subverting HUD funds and ended with Tony giving Assemblyman Zelman a beat down with his belt for having the audacity to date Tony’s ex-girlfriend. It was one of the great 4th season episodes. From there Nick went on to write and produce The Guardian and Law & Order. He also created and executive produced the reality show Beauty & The Geek. He then began on season 1 of one of this blog’s favorite all time shows “Prison Break” and stayed on all the way through all four seasons. He even penned the series swan song “The Final Break.”
Along the way he wrote a National best-selling novel and – oh yeah – he used to be a lawyer in Brooklyn. He’s also a great guy and a friend of mine, so I asked him if he wouldn’t mind me barraging him with questions about his life and career. The following is part one of a four part interview. I caught up with Nick as he was getting lost between the 101 and 405 trying to get to Burbank to do a final mix on the edit of his brand new pilot “Breakout Kings” which he co-created with Prison Break showrunner, Matt Olmstead.
These are heady times for Nick as he awaits word from Fox over his pilot, but despite the stress and anxiety of prepping a pilot, Nick was nice enough to grant these interviews and I thought the shows he worked on were of particular interest to readers of this blog:
NICK SANTORA INTERVIEW PART I
Digital Couch: So, where do we start? Sly Stallone said that before Rocky, he was as low as one could be in this business and you kind of weren’t even in the business when you started. Can you take us through that as best you can?
Nick: I was a lawyer in Manhattan. I worked for Sullivan and Cromwell, one of the most prominent law firms in the world. I was doing so much paper pushing I knew I’d never get into a courtroom and actually litigate, so I switched my place of business, and went from a huge high-end firm to a firm with five lawyers literally located above a pizza place in Brooklyn. I went from dealing with Fortune 500 companies to guys who got hurt on construction sites or slipped and fell in supermarkets.
On the whole, I was a very unhappy person. I was in my mid-20s, I was a lawyer, and by the time I got to my late 20s and saw 30 approaching I was miserable. My wife one morning comes out of the bathroom - she saw me in my boxers and wearing a shirt sitting on the edge of the bed, not getting ready for work – I had been there for an hour. I looked at her and said “it’ll get better.” I was talking about my depression over this existence I had chosen and felt stuck in. My wife answered “it better.”
The truth is, I was in a constant cloud of misery. I was looking down the barrel of 30 more years of practicing law, which is the last thing I wanted to do. I wanted to write.
When I was 6 years old, I wrote a poem and I remember what it felt like to put words together and see how they “fit” in place…to me that was an electrifying experience and to this day I remember that poem:
I Would Like To Be An Orange
By Nick Santora (at 6 years old)
I would like to be an orange.
To have some orange skin.
I would like to be an orange.
To have a lovely grin.
I would like to be an orange.
To be washed and to be dried.
I’m always an orange.
I’m an orange inside.
DC: Nick, that was beautiful.
Nick: Dude, I don’t even like fucking oranges. But it started the idea of putting words together for me. I remember it so well because I still get that feeling everyday where you think you pick the right word…it’s a chemical release in my brain. It feels like you’re high – a natural high. All through my life I would write stories. Back when I was dating my wife and I was broke, (Law School and the loans added up to being poor) I would write novellas for her as gifts. But even though I wanted to write, I felt that I owed my family a law degree since they had put up the funds to get me a very expensive education. In fact, I was the first male Santora to graduate college.
DC: Sounds great, but also sounds like a bit of a burden.
Nick: A heavy burden. Anyway, so now I’m in law for a living, I’m hating it and miserable and I felt like she’d (my wife) eventually catch my misery and leave me because I’m such a sad-sack bastard. And I wouldn’t blame her.
A few days later, I’m in Manhattan and I’m covering a few motions that are being dealt with at he same time. I’m running from courthouse to courthouse. I’m worried that one of my cases would get marked off the court calendar because maybe I’d be late. And while I’m running , this blind woman on the corner says “would somebody help me cross the street?” So, I blow past this woman like she’s a statue, I’m half-way across the street…now this becomes a major moment in my life. Here I am, running around, literally ignoring a disabled person who’s asking for help to get to a job I fucking hate. I wondered what my mom would think if she could see me right now? So go back, grab the woman, and she keeps thanking me and I’m thinking “I have to make a change.”
My wife and I were planning a vacation. I asked her if I could take the last week of my time off and just stay home and try my hand at writing a screenplay. My wife said “Absolutely! Stop talking about it and finally write something.”
So I had that last week off. Took out my wife to dinner that Friday night, went to bed early, then Saturday morning, I sat down at our shitty kitchen table and really shitty computer in our completely shitty apartment, and I started to write. I started Saturday morning and finished around midnight the next Sunday. Nine straight days of writing and I finished a script called “Slip & Fall.”
I was so naïve. I figured I finished a script, now some agent’s going to want to represent me. See, the thing is, in California, everyone has a script. From the taxi driver to the doorman to the executives, everybody has a script. New York is a little different (at the time.) Back then in New York, nobody wrote screenplays at that time. So I went online thinking I’ll search for an agent. I typed in “screenplay agent.” What came up was a screenplay competition that had agents showing up at it.
There was also a film festival portion, and then a competition for unproduced screenplays. The directions on the contest were not to send a script but rather a synopsis. So I did. A few days later I got a call saying they’d like to read the script. But the guy from the contest said “we get hundreds and we only pick about 20 or so.” So I send it and figure that’s the end of it.
A few weeks later, I get a call saying “you’re in the competition.” I’m such a rube, I go out to Nordstroms with my wife and buy a new suit and tie that I couldn’t afford, so I can make a spiffy showing at the competition. I get there, all the other writers are dressed like slobs and now because of my suit, they think I’m an agent. So I’m getting scripts handed to me by writers, I’m getting cornered by writers, but eventually I get to pitch the judges my script and by the time I realized what was going on I realized I had somehow blown this opportunity to mix it up with agents all over this fucking suit I had worn.
A few weeks later, I’m alone in the office working on a motion and my phone rings. It’s the film festival. “Congats, we’re going to announce tomorrow that you won best screenplay.” I say “great, what do I win?” The person says to me “You win your life is going to change.”
Sure enough, I started getting calls from agencies. I signed with United Talent Agency and within a few months they got me a job writing for a show that had a 13 episode script order for a show called AT END OF DAY which was an original series for A&E. I remember the day I was supposed to start writing it. September 11, 2001.
The guy who hired me, the showrunner, Mark Rosner, called and said “you don’t have to worry. I can find someone else. I don’t expect you to finish this script with what’s going on in New York.” My response was “I want to do this more than ever.” The tragedy pointed out that any day could be your last, and I wanted this. The show didn’t get picked up, but that script did two things for me, it showed my agents that I could do the job and got me into the Writer’s Guild.
The showrunner called my agent and said “he did a great job! You should work for this guy.” A few months later I’m still doing law, and the agents call and say I have to take a meeting. I say “I can’t just pick up and take off to LA anytime there’s a possible job.” The agent said “Trust me, you want to take this meeting, and it’s in New York.”
I though a minute and said “It’s not…”
My agent replied “Yes, the meeting is with David Chase. The show is The Sopranos.”
To be continued:
2010/04/28
New Meatloaf and Lopez Tonight!
Meatloaf: Be Cool Teddy Bear (AUDIO CD) *Early review!
Readers of this blog know how much I worship Meatloaf. I love the guy. Bat I & II were among the best CDs ever made, and even Bat III had moments of greatness, if not real cohesiveness. I've been to many Meatloaf shows, but the one I went to a few years back in San Diego made me realize something - Meat's getting old. In his 60s now, that voice, at least on stage, can't really do what it used to. Truth be told, his vocals have really fallen apart live.
The studio is a much different story. I don't know what tools they use, but Meatloaf can definitely belt it out old-school style in the studio and easily sounds like the Meat of years ago.
That is what's so frustrating about writing this review. Here we have Meatloaf, ready and super-game to do something truly different, and he does. To some seriously mixed results. I'm not saying one couldn't like this CD, and I'm sure it will find its fans...but something really doesn't work here. The production is better than it’s been in years. His songs have a musicality I've not heard from him in forever. (Bat III was great - but it relied heavily on his age-old formula. A formula I love.)
Produced by Rob Cavallo, who does the Green Day albums among others, here was a case of a truly great producer, great musicians and best of all, Cavallo has always idolized Meatloaf and wanted to make a great album with him.
The CD supposedly is a concept album about a dying soldier dreaming of all the things he'll never have...but I defy anyone to find that thread in the songs or lyrics. Although there is certainly a particular style and a unification of sound here, the concept completely eluded me, as I'm sure it will most.
Okay, so is the CD any good? Yes and no. It SOUNDS good. It has a nice production value and Meat's voice sounds stronger than it has any right to and game enough to handle all kinds of lyrical patterns we've never heard from him. And yet, that's part of the problem.
We just want a great Meatloaf album. Which usually means soaring pianos, melodramatic lyrics about lost love and most of all - a sense of humor about the proceedings.
As I write this, I'm giving it a 3rd listen. It rocks harder than most Mead CDs, and again, not really a good thing. That said, there are some moments here that work. I think this might be the very first time an entire CD goes by without any Steinman tracks. (Maybe there were one or two others, but I honestly can't think of any. Possibly that one right before Bat III.)
Backstory: Meat and Steinman did Bat I together, then fought and parted. But in the 5 or so subsequent Meat CDs, Meatloaf often turned to the Steinman back catalogue for some guaranteed winners on each CD. Great Meatloaf songs without Steinman involved in some way are a rarity, but they do exist. (I'd Lie For You, Piece Of The Action, Hot Patootie (RHPS) and Blind as a Bat are all non-Steinman penned, but heavily Steinman influenced.)
Here it's all guest-stars and behind the scenes names that...I don't know. Kara Dioguardi from American Idol is here, singing and penning one tune. Hugh Laurie, who plays HOUSE is here playing piano on the CD's arguably best cut, the Springsteen-esque If I Can't Have You (it's no Springsteen.) He even duets with Jack Black on one tune that's instantly forgettable and…I mean – what the fuck? He’s now doing flat out parody and not knowing it? It reminds me of Eddie Murphy trying to be a singer with PARTY ALL THE TIME (that actually wasn’t bad.)
And that's the problem with the entire CD, its just way too forgettable. Meatloaf sings well, the music sounds good and well-produced, yet this might be the very first Meatloaf CD ever that I have not found one song to cling to. It sounds very generic with that great voice trapped in songs that never take off. Again, there are moments were you can see how this might've worked, but sadly, it really doesn't. And since he usually takes at least 3/4 years between CDs, this is a massive disappointment. Just way too much electric guitar, just so much noise when all we really want is a piano, Meatloaf and Jim Steinman.
Here is my suggestion for the next Meatloaf CD. If you can't patch things up with Steinman, do a BEST OF BAT: UNPLUGGED with stripped, slowed down versions of hits like Bat out of Hell and Anything For Love.
I love Meatloaf. I had such high hopes. But it's hard to review these songs because they are just so unsubstantial I wouldn't know where to begin.
If you have to listen to a few cuts, I'd go with If I Can't Have You (at least it tries) and the CD closer Elvis In Vegas just might grow on me....I don't know. This is...really disappointing.
Grade: C -
UPDATE: I just saw on AMAZON that with the release of HANG COOL TEDDY BEAR (a line from a Russ Meyer film written by Roger Ebert) will come a 2nd CD of a new Meatloaf concert - so, there is now some justification to buy the "deluxe" version of this...I guess. I'll let you know how that concert CD is once I get it.
ONE MORE THOUGHT: I really do love Meatloaf. It'd be great if he can pull one more CD off with Jim Steinman, but if not, what's good here is that its very clear that Meat can pull off complicated vocals in a studio setting. Now with the right mix of writers and producers (not catch of the day people - I love Jack Black, but his mere presence here doesn't represent anything good) - but, and call me crazy, I think the NEXT Meatloaf CD is going to rock in a good way. And for whatever its worth, some people might love this disc as its a lot more grounded than the previous work, so - please support Meat and buy this CD so he's encouraged to record more. That's it on Meatloaf for a while.
Hachi: A Dog's Tale (DVD)
Direct to DVD (and PPV) this is a very famous story about an Akido dog found at a train station by Richard Gere. Directed by Lasse Halstron, this is not your average straight-to-video. With the exception of a slightly annoying framing device, which kind of works but just feels unnecessary, this might be a classic on the order of Old Yeller. Even thinking about the story, which frankly, I don't want to get into because anything said here will be a spoiler, just know that this is not your average dog movie, it's unusually concerned with the relationship with Gere and the dog, it is true, and there are scenes in the last 40 minutes that you will remember forever.
This is not perfect, as there are some basic questions here that go unanswered. (Like - the dog always goes to the train station and nobody ever seems concerned that something will happen to him....) - but it doesn't matter, because the vast majority of this not only works, it works so well you may never forget certain images.
We should all be so lucky to one day have a dog like Hachi. I love him, and I loved this movie.
That said, there is much subtlety here, so don't expect something grand like the overblown movie version of Marley & Me (this is a much better film.) This is a real movie from a real director in which one of the two actors here happens to be a dog.
Grade: A (A must-see.)
UPDATE: It's been a few days and I can't stop thinking about some of the images and scenes in this movie. I'm giving it a rare upgrade:
Grade: A + (despite some flaws) because what works here works so well. For contrast, see MARLY & ME to see how NOT to do a dog movie. (I recently watched it again with my friend Gail and like it even more. It's a really small subtle movie so I don't want to overhype, but this is the real deal.)
I was watching Eddie Murphy on Letterman the other night and remembering how great he used to be and how cool he always seemed. It was a very funny interview and Murphy was as open as he could be, avoiding the obvious. It almost made me think he can put together another stand up special if he wasn't so hung up about his past.
Speaking of late night, well, Leno is back and unfunny as ever. Truly. Only now it’s with confidence!
Conan, as I'm sure you've heard, is going to TBS. But in order to do that, he had to push George Lopez of LOPEZ TONIGHT! back an hour. Lopez was only to happen to have a reconizable lead in.
In fact, truth be told, by reading this blog, you know what a TV freak I am, yet I honestly had NO IDEA Lopez even had a late night show.
Look, for my money, it's Kimmel and Letterman. With Letterman as the elder statesman who runs the job like a pro, and Jimmy taking the talk show into the next century. The two shows are different enough that it's great to have both of them around. I think Jimmy's monologue is the best in television and his bits are always top-notch and best of all, he really has a way with his guests. Unlike Conan or Jay, he's a real listener and a gifted ad-libber. He and Letterman have it going on.
I don't particularly like Craig Ferguson, but at least I get it. He's a funny man. He has some good instincts. He was very funny on Drew Carrey, but c'mon - I'd rather take a bullet in the head than watch the full hour. He can only try so hard.
Then there's Conan, who frankly, I never got, and I suspect his TBS show will get some attention and then die a very painfully slow death.
And then where does that leave George Lopez?
LOPEZ TONIGHT! (TBS)
As far as George Lopez goes, the only think I ever really knew about him is that he was on a truly middle-of-the-road sitcom, that Sandra Bullock would occasionally come on and literally do pratfall all over the set. (At the time, Sandra was determined, to ugly comic non-effect) that she was the next Lucille Ball and that her "whacky" falls were knee-slapping comedy incarnate. She was also quite proud of herself for finding Lopez in a sea of comedians and putting her name behind him. (They could remake the whole thing as The Other Blind Side.) But the truth is that show wasn’t bad, Lopez was a sympathetic character and the supporting cast was quite good, if not particularly memorable.
At some point after 4 or 5 unremarkable seasons and really not remembering even one episode even though I somehow had watched quite a few, Lopez disappears from the market, and then shows up occasionally as a super-funny guest on Jimmy Kimmel's show. (I'm not going to say the man is unfunny nor not talented. His shtick seems to work for the first few minutes and he’s a better guest than host.)
Ok, now to the late night show – Lopez Tonight!
Right off the bat, his audience appears to be the size of Staples Center. I'm not kidding. There are like, THOUSANDS of audience members. It's weird. They sometimes cut to the back row and it seems like a Dodger game. Then George Lopez appears to be un-miked - so it sounds like he's SCREAMING to be heard by everyone. Maybe that's his thing, but he's constantly SCREAMING his jokes. Oh, and those jokes. Those terrible, wretched fucking jokes, delivered by a panting, desperate screaming man who stumbles over 90 percent of the punchlines. What an opening. He and his jokes both seem exhausted.
Then he might have some insanely bad bit, he'll bring on his guests...he had Benjamin Bratt one night, you would've thought he was bringing on Brad Pitt the way he carried on. And he's so nervous around his guests the banter is as forced as a hostage negotiation. I feel bad for the guests who have to fake laugh their way through the whole thing. And Lopez says some very...strange stuff. He said to Bratt many times during that interview "Look at you, all tall and skinny - I'm so jealous!" He did this like 8 times. Was he fishing?
I will tell Lopez what The Godfather once said "Be a man! Be a man!"
Oh, and here is the breakdown of almost every single Lopez joke:
Here is how WHITE people do it.
Here is how LATINOS do it.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
He had on Jennifer Lopez the other night, you would've thought he was bringing on the Queen of England. Lopez himself seemed shocked he had on a big guest, and again, he was weird about how – he told this very complicated and bungled story of he and J.Lo and friends at some charity function and mentioned how they all got bad looking at the end of the night but J. Lo always looks great. Why is this man always fishing for compliments? You’re a comedian. Relax. It’s okay that you look like a fucking monster.
Anyway - what else can I say. This is either the worst show in the history of late night (and I'm including the Magic Hour and the Chevy Chase show) or the best, I guess depending on what you're on at the time you're watching it.
Stone cold sober, this show gets a:
Grade: F -
16 & Pregnant (MTV)
Great show. Huge bummer. The girls are great, in that they were so crazy to get pregnant at such a young age, but in most cases, from what I've watched, the pregnancy really forces them to get their shit together. It's the guys here that are unbelievably awful. The whole thing is a little too depressing for me. But in its way, it's an important show for the MTV audience. It's real, gritty and not soft soaped. Class from the people that brought us JERSEY SHORE? I guess so.
Grade: B
SNL: Ryan Phillipe
Dead on arrival. One of their very worst. Ryan was game - the cast was lame.
Grade: D -
SNL: Gabourey Sidibe
After a lively opening, this went from worse to worse. Sidibe was lively, but apparently thinks that loud and obnoxious equals funny. The sketches were ghastly.
Grade: D -
SNL: The 2000s: Ups and Downs.
Not quite as good as the previous decade wrap ups somehow, which all seemed more documentary like. This felt more like a greatest hits episode of the last year, but that said, there was some great stuff here. Particularly the Lonely Island talking about their evolution on the show through Andy Samberg and how the digital shorts going viral made such a huge impact in how SNL has been interpreted in the age of YouTube.
Grade: B
SoberHouse (Vh1)
You're still the one I love, still the one I care for...
Grade: A
Readers of this blog know how much I worship Meatloaf. I love the guy. Bat I & II were among the best CDs ever made, and even Bat III had moments of greatness, if not real cohesiveness. I've been to many Meatloaf shows, but the one I went to a few years back in San Diego made me realize something - Meat's getting old. In his 60s now, that voice, at least on stage, can't really do what it used to. Truth be told, his vocals have really fallen apart live.
The studio is a much different story. I don't know what tools they use, but Meatloaf can definitely belt it out old-school style in the studio and easily sounds like the Meat of years ago.
That is what's so frustrating about writing this review. Here we have Meatloaf, ready and super-game to do something truly different, and he does. To some seriously mixed results. I'm not saying one couldn't like this CD, and I'm sure it will find its fans...but something really doesn't work here. The production is better than it’s been in years. His songs have a musicality I've not heard from him in forever. (Bat III was great - but it relied heavily on his age-old formula. A formula I love.)
Produced by Rob Cavallo, who does the Green Day albums among others, here was a case of a truly great producer, great musicians and best of all, Cavallo has always idolized Meatloaf and wanted to make a great album with him.
The CD supposedly is a concept album about a dying soldier dreaming of all the things he'll never have...but I defy anyone to find that thread in the songs or lyrics. Although there is certainly a particular style and a unification of sound here, the concept completely eluded me, as I'm sure it will most.
Okay, so is the CD any good? Yes and no. It SOUNDS good. It has a nice production value and Meat's voice sounds stronger than it has any right to and game enough to handle all kinds of lyrical patterns we've never heard from him. And yet, that's part of the problem.
We just want a great Meatloaf album. Which usually means soaring pianos, melodramatic lyrics about lost love and most of all - a sense of humor about the proceedings.
As I write this, I'm giving it a 3rd listen. It rocks harder than most Mead CDs, and again, not really a good thing. That said, there are some moments here that work. I think this might be the very first time an entire CD goes by without any Steinman tracks. (Maybe there were one or two others, but I honestly can't think of any. Possibly that one right before Bat III.)
Backstory: Meat and Steinman did Bat I together, then fought and parted. But in the 5 or so subsequent Meat CDs, Meatloaf often turned to the Steinman back catalogue for some guaranteed winners on each CD. Great Meatloaf songs without Steinman involved in some way are a rarity, but they do exist. (I'd Lie For You, Piece Of The Action, Hot Patootie (RHPS) and Blind as a Bat are all non-Steinman penned, but heavily Steinman influenced.)
Here it's all guest-stars and behind the scenes names that...I don't know. Kara Dioguardi from American Idol is here, singing and penning one tune. Hugh Laurie, who plays HOUSE is here playing piano on the CD's arguably best cut, the Springsteen-esque If I Can't Have You (it's no Springsteen.) He even duets with Jack Black on one tune that's instantly forgettable and…I mean – what the fuck? He’s now doing flat out parody and not knowing it? It reminds me of Eddie Murphy trying to be a singer with PARTY ALL THE TIME (that actually wasn’t bad.)
And that's the problem with the entire CD, its just way too forgettable. Meatloaf sings well, the music sounds good and well-produced, yet this might be the very first Meatloaf CD ever that I have not found one song to cling to. It sounds very generic with that great voice trapped in songs that never take off. Again, there are moments were you can see how this might've worked, but sadly, it really doesn't. And since he usually takes at least 3/4 years between CDs, this is a massive disappointment. Just way too much electric guitar, just so much noise when all we really want is a piano, Meatloaf and Jim Steinman.
Here is my suggestion for the next Meatloaf CD. If you can't patch things up with Steinman, do a BEST OF BAT: UNPLUGGED with stripped, slowed down versions of hits like Bat out of Hell and Anything For Love.
I love Meatloaf. I had such high hopes. But it's hard to review these songs because they are just so unsubstantial I wouldn't know where to begin.
If you have to listen to a few cuts, I'd go with If I Can't Have You (at least it tries) and the CD closer Elvis In Vegas just might grow on me....I don't know. This is...really disappointing.
Grade: C -
UPDATE: I just saw on AMAZON that with the release of HANG COOL TEDDY BEAR (a line from a Russ Meyer film written by Roger Ebert) will come a 2nd CD of a new Meatloaf concert - so, there is now some justification to buy the "deluxe" version of this...I guess. I'll let you know how that concert CD is once I get it.
ONE MORE THOUGHT: I really do love Meatloaf. It'd be great if he can pull one more CD off with Jim Steinman, but if not, what's good here is that its very clear that Meat can pull off complicated vocals in a studio setting. Now with the right mix of writers and producers (not catch of the day people - I love Jack Black, but his mere presence here doesn't represent anything good) - but, and call me crazy, I think the NEXT Meatloaf CD is going to rock in a good way. And for whatever its worth, some people might love this disc as its a lot more grounded than the previous work, so - please support Meat and buy this CD so he's encouraged to record more. That's it on Meatloaf for a while.
Hachi: A Dog's Tale (DVD)
Direct to DVD (and PPV) this is a very famous story about an Akido dog found at a train station by Richard Gere. Directed by Lasse Halstron, this is not your average straight-to-video. With the exception of a slightly annoying framing device, which kind of works but just feels unnecessary, this might be a classic on the order of Old Yeller. Even thinking about the story, which frankly, I don't want to get into because anything said here will be a spoiler, just know that this is not your average dog movie, it's unusually concerned with the relationship with Gere and the dog, it is true, and there are scenes in the last 40 minutes that you will remember forever.
This is not perfect, as there are some basic questions here that go unanswered. (Like - the dog always goes to the train station and nobody ever seems concerned that something will happen to him....) - but it doesn't matter, because the vast majority of this not only works, it works so well you may never forget certain images.
We should all be so lucky to one day have a dog like Hachi. I love him, and I loved this movie.
That said, there is much subtlety here, so don't expect something grand like the overblown movie version of Marley & Me (this is a much better film.) This is a real movie from a real director in which one of the two actors here happens to be a dog.
Grade: A (A must-see.)
UPDATE: It's been a few days and I can't stop thinking about some of the images and scenes in this movie. I'm giving it a rare upgrade:
Grade: A + (despite some flaws) because what works here works so well. For contrast, see MARLY & ME to see how NOT to do a dog movie. (I recently watched it again with my friend Gail and like it even more. It's a really small subtle movie so I don't want to overhype, but this is the real deal.)
I was watching Eddie Murphy on Letterman the other night and remembering how great he used to be and how cool he always seemed. It was a very funny interview and Murphy was as open as he could be, avoiding the obvious. It almost made me think he can put together another stand up special if he wasn't so hung up about his past.
Speaking of late night, well, Leno is back and unfunny as ever. Truly. Only now it’s with confidence!
Conan, as I'm sure you've heard, is going to TBS. But in order to do that, he had to push George Lopez of LOPEZ TONIGHT! back an hour. Lopez was only to happen to have a reconizable lead in.
In fact, truth be told, by reading this blog, you know what a TV freak I am, yet I honestly had NO IDEA Lopez even had a late night show.
Look, for my money, it's Kimmel and Letterman. With Letterman as the elder statesman who runs the job like a pro, and Jimmy taking the talk show into the next century. The two shows are different enough that it's great to have both of them around. I think Jimmy's monologue is the best in television and his bits are always top-notch and best of all, he really has a way with his guests. Unlike Conan or Jay, he's a real listener and a gifted ad-libber. He and Letterman have it going on.
I don't particularly like Craig Ferguson, but at least I get it. He's a funny man. He has some good instincts. He was very funny on Drew Carrey, but c'mon - I'd rather take a bullet in the head than watch the full hour. He can only try so hard.
Then there's Conan, who frankly, I never got, and I suspect his TBS show will get some attention and then die a very painfully slow death.
And then where does that leave George Lopez?
LOPEZ TONIGHT! (TBS)
As far as George Lopez goes, the only think I ever really knew about him is that he was on a truly middle-of-the-road sitcom, that Sandra Bullock would occasionally come on and literally do pratfall all over the set. (At the time, Sandra was determined, to ugly comic non-effect) that she was the next Lucille Ball and that her "whacky" falls were knee-slapping comedy incarnate. She was also quite proud of herself for finding Lopez in a sea of comedians and putting her name behind him. (They could remake the whole thing as The Other Blind Side.) But the truth is that show wasn’t bad, Lopez was a sympathetic character and the supporting cast was quite good, if not particularly memorable.
At some point after 4 or 5 unremarkable seasons and really not remembering even one episode even though I somehow had watched quite a few, Lopez disappears from the market, and then shows up occasionally as a super-funny guest on Jimmy Kimmel's show. (I'm not going to say the man is unfunny nor not talented. His shtick seems to work for the first few minutes and he’s a better guest than host.)
Ok, now to the late night show – Lopez Tonight!
Right off the bat, his audience appears to be the size of Staples Center. I'm not kidding. There are like, THOUSANDS of audience members. It's weird. They sometimes cut to the back row and it seems like a Dodger game. Then George Lopez appears to be un-miked - so it sounds like he's SCREAMING to be heard by everyone. Maybe that's his thing, but he's constantly SCREAMING his jokes. Oh, and those jokes. Those terrible, wretched fucking jokes, delivered by a panting, desperate screaming man who stumbles over 90 percent of the punchlines. What an opening. He and his jokes both seem exhausted.
Then he might have some insanely bad bit, he'll bring on his guests...he had Benjamin Bratt one night, you would've thought he was bringing on Brad Pitt the way he carried on. And he's so nervous around his guests the banter is as forced as a hostage negotiation. I feel bad for the guests who have to fake laugh their way through the whole thing. And Lopez says some very...strange stuff. He said to Bratt many times during that interview "Look at you, all tall and skinny - I'm so jealous!" He did this like 8 times. Was he fishing?
I will tell Lopez what The Godfather once said "Be a man! Be a man!"
Oh, and here is the breakdown of almost every single Lopez joke:
Here is how WHITE people do it.
Here is how LATINOS do it.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
He had on Jennifer Lopez the other night, you would've thought he was bringing on the Queen of England. Lopez himself seemed shocked he had on a big guest, and again, he was weird about how – he told this very complicated and bungled story of he and J.Lo and friends at some charity function and mentioned how they all got bad looking at the end of the night but J. Lo always looks great. Why is this man always fishing for compliments? You’re a comedian. Relax. It’s okay that you look like a fucking monster.
Anyway - what else can I say. This is either the worst show in the history of late night (and I'm including the Magic Hour and the Chevy Chase show) or the best, I guess depending on what you're on at the time you're watching it.
Stone cold sober, this show gets a:
Grade: F -
16 & Pregnant (MTV)
Great show. Huge bummer. The girls are great, in that they were so crazy to get pregnant at such a young age, but in most cases, from what I've watched, the pregnancy really forces them to get their shit together. It's the guys here that are unbelievably awful. The whole thing is a little too depressing for me. But in its way, it's an important show for the MTV audience. It's real, gritty and not soft soaped. Class from the people that brought us JERSEY SHORE? I guess so.
Grade: B
SNL: Ryan Phillipe
Dead on arrival. One of their very worst. Ryan was game - the cast was lame.
Grade: D -
SNL: Gabourey Sidibe
After a lively opening, this went from worse to worse. Sidibe was lively, but apparently thinks that loud and obnoxious equals funny. The sketches were ghastly.
Grade: D -
SNL: The 2000s: Ups and Downs.
Not quite as good as the previous decade wrap ups somehow, which all seemed more documentary like. This felt more like a greatest hits episode of the last year, but that said, there was some great stuff here. Particularly the Lonely Island talking about their evolution on the show through Andy Samberg and how the digital shorts going viral made such a huge impact in how SNL has been interpreted in the age of YouTube.
Grade: B
SoberHouse (Vh1)
You're still the one I love, still the one I care for...
Grade: A
2010/04/21
The Animal Review.
THE ANIMAL REVIEW (in bookstores and Amazon.com)
(click HERE to order book!)
The Animal Review reminds me of my own blog, if my own blog were actually witty and funny on a line by line basis. But instead of reviewing film and television, the genius writing team of Jake Lentz and Steve Nash have chosen to review animals as if they were objectively gradable.
They gave the Panda an F which landed them in a lot of mock hot water, as they pointed out the national obsession with Pandas disinterest in mating and their "refusal to act like real bears."
They give the King Cobra an A +, since, as the writers put it "like you're going to be the one to give King Cobra an A -. Yeah, good luck with that one."
Not only is this hilarious but educational in the best way, you don't realize you're being educated because you're laughing too hard. This is literally the best thing I've read in ages.
I will tell you from a jaded media sponge who sees and watches everything, this book made me laugh out loud and hope for a second book. I even went and bought copies through Amazon for all my friends. It's probably the most original take on the role of a critic I've ever seen, and I urge all my readers to go out and buy this immediately.
Grade: A +
LOST (ABC)
I know I've been really giving LOST a hard time, but I have to say the last few episodes have been pretty good. The one with Hurley was actually great, and this week has been good as well with things finally coming to a head. Although...if I had to nitpick:
SPOILERS AHEAD: IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED THE LAST 2 WEEKS OF LOST, DO NOT READ
1.) Last week the Locke Monster threw a torch into the well and we never heard it land. He then through Desmond into the well, leading us to believe Desmond was dead and setting up Locke Monster as a real piece of shit. This week, to accomidate story, not only was Desmond fine in that well, but the well appeared to be about 4 feet deep and easily able to climb out of.
2.) They said Clair had the same disease that Sayid now has - that she died and came back and turned evil (pointed out by her big bad floppy makeup-room nightmare hair that is clearly some kind of fright wig that LOST producers didn't realize looked like a bad Halloween joke.) Okay, so Clair has this disease that Sayid the emotionless killer now has. The problem, Clair, after getting yelled at by a few cast members, now seems perfectly fine. So again, the mythology seems to bend for story convenience at every turn.
That said, I was completely impressed by the fact that they managed to tie the scene from the mental hospital with Hurley and Libby in from season 2 with the curent storyline. I was convinced that it was a huge error back then that went very far in suggesting that the entire thing was in Hurley's mind - but they have explained that very long gestating sore point of storytelling, and even though I didn't care for a lot of the direction, the finale is starting to really pick up steam and I'm kind of somewhere in between on it now. I can't say I'm not looking forward to the finale, although I'm not sure my original predictions are correct. I have a bit more to say about LOST but I'm going to wait a few more episodes and see how this last leg develops.
Final Season Grade So Far: B + (and climbing)
STANLEY KUBRICK: BOXES (Sundance)
A great documentary in a sea of documentaries about the late, great director, this tale revolves around the Kubrick estate and is narrated mostly by his brother. It seems Kubrick had about a million ideas on everything from TV to movies to building new types of everyday equipment. He kept all the ideas, scripts, notes, prototypes - in these boxes. And this fascinating 90 minute doc goes through the boxes and it doing so, treads over the director's life.
Grade: B
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (Fox)
I've already written enough about this show, but let me say a few more things about maybe one of the best reality shows ever. First of all, I fucking HATE Hell's Kitchen. That show outlived its usefulness after about 2 seasons. But in this, it has this great formula where Chef Ramsey, a natural reality TV star if there ever was one, go into the resturaunt in question and taste their best dishes. This segment usually ends with the Chef either throwing up or pulling the food apart to reveal the ingredients like a 5 year old. Then he screams at everybody till they come around and usually, by the 3rd act, the owners, who are ready to fist fight Ramsey initially are hugging him and thanking him for completely re-doing his restaurant. I was at Dupar's last night on Ventura, famous for their pies and I was thinking hmmm......I could pull a Chef Ramsey in this place. It's just the greatest. I don't normally give such a high grade to these shows, and I'm sure we're all being manipulated by editing, but....
Grade: A
24 (Fox)
The last hours have proved to really perk up this initially dreary installment. The killing of Hassan, the promotion of Chloe, Jacks ill-fated romance (with a woman who had sex just a few hours earlier with a bad guy!), the return of Logan, they are really going balls-out on this finale and I am loving it. I know some of the turns are a bit wonky, but 24 has never been the most accurately detailed show - just one of the funnest. And these final hours have given the writers the freedom to really do everything they want, and suddenly this show is great again. If only it all didn't pivot around the Peace Talks! Still....
Grade: A
(I know it seems like I'm loving everything these days, but hey, I don't try to watch shows I don't like!)
I have more coming up.
Stay tuned.
I have a full review of the DAMAGES season finale on its way.
And check out THE ANIMAL REVIEW!
2010/04/13
I LOVE SARAH JANE
I LOVE SARAH JANE (SUNDANCE)
This was a great 15 minute short about a British trio of families living in a post apocolyptic world with zombies. As amped up as that sounds, it's small, subtle and quite moving. I wish George A. Romero could still pull some drama out of the genre he created, but he'd be wise to team up with whoever was responsible for this film.
Grade: A
By the way, I have seen the 3rd film in George Romero's latter day trilogy "Survival Of the Dead."
Since I was shown an early cut, I wanted to see a final cut before I review it. But an early review is coming - maybe as early as next week.
For those of us who were into the DEAD films of Romero, Land Of The Dead, Diary of the Dead and now, Survival of the Dead - this is like the new Star Wars trilogy for Zombie freaks. Unfortuntely, we're been just as dissapointed. Frankly, I liked the 2004 remaked of DAWN OF THE DEAD better than the new Romero Zombie films.
UNDERCOVER BOSS (CBS)
I still like it, I just think it's completely predictable. The same experience happens every single week. They need to mix it up a bit more for next season.
Adam Lambert Unplugged (MTV)
I loved Lambert on Idol. Here he just reprises some of those tunes and a few new ones, but it's a bore. Adam sings well, but somewhere along his road to fame, something cool was lost somehow.
Grade: C -
SOUTH PARK has been outragously funny this season. They have not had one sub-par episode yet. Who knew in its 15th year the show would be on fire? The recent Facebook themed ep, "YOU HAVE ZERO FRIENDS" was the bomb.
DAMAGES is coming to a conclusion. Last night they had their penultimate episode. What a great season. Martin short is fantastic as I've said earlier, but I wasn't crazy about the twist that storyline took, and frankly, the storytelling in the final leg is pushing credibility, but I love it nonetheless and can't wait for the finale - in what will probably end up being the series finale, as DAMAGES can't seem to get enough veiwers to warrant another year. Too bad, since its easily one of the finest dramas on TV.
Speaking of which, Hugh Larie did a great job directing himself on HOUSE, M.D. last night. They actually had some fun with the traditional "bottle" episode.
This was a great 15 minute short about a British trio of families living in a post apocolyptic world with zombies. As amped up as that sounds, it's small, subtle and quite moving. I wish George A. Romero could still pull some drama out of the genre he created, but he'd be wise to team up with whoever was responsible for this film.
Grade: A
By the way, I have seen the 3rd film in George Romero's latter day trilogy "Survival Of the Dead."
Since I was shown an early cut, I wanted to see a final cut before I review it. But an early review is coming - maybe as early as next week.
For those of us who were into the DEAD films of Romero, Land Of The Dead, Diary of the Dead and now, Survival of the Dead - this is like the new Star Wars trilogy for Zombie freaks. Unfortuntely, we're been just as dissapointed. Frankly, I liked the 2004 remaked of DAWN OF THE DEAD better than the new Romero Zombie films.
UNDERCOVER BOSS (CBS)
I still like it, I just think it's completely predictable. The same experience happens every single week. They need to mix it up a bit more for next season.
Adam Lambert Unplugged (MTV)
I loved Lambert on Idol. Here he just reprises some of those tunes and a few new ones, but it's a bore. Adam sings well, but somewhere along his road to fame, something cool was lost somehow.
Grade: C -
SOUTH PARK has been outragously funny this season. They have not had one sub-par episode yet. Who knew in its 15th year the show would be on fire? The recent Facebook themed ep, "YOU HAVE ZERO FRIENDS" was the bomb.
DAMAGES is coming to a conclusion. Last night they had their penultimate episode. What a great season. Martin short is fantastic as I've said earlier, but I wasn't crazy about the twist that storyline took, and frankly, the storytelling in the final leg is pushing credibility, but I love it nonetheless and can't wait for the finale - in what will probably end up being the series finale, as DAMAGES can't seem to get enough veiwers to warrant another year. Too bad, since its easily one of the finest dramas on TV.
Speaking of which, Hugh Larie did a great job directing himself on HOUSE, M.D. last night. They actually had some fun with the traditional "bottle" episode.
2010/04/11
Damages, Idol and Lost.
DAMAGES (F/X)
What a fantastic season. I think there are 2 left, but last week I started unspooling these from the DVR. Glenn Close is more brilliant than ever as Patty Hewes. Rose Byrne...still not so much. But less seen and therefore, more effective thise season. She's not a terribly good actress, but the staff seems to have found a better way to posit her into the action this year. Although did we REALLY need her adoption story line in the 3rd leg of this? Also, Ted Danson is back as Arthur Frobisher. It's an incredibly self-reflexive storyline that really pushes the limit of how much your remember season 1 - which is not a great thing to do when you're only in season 3. That said, Danson is good in the role (even though the whole storyline is really dodgy) - it just kind of works. And I do wish they'd do away with the dream sequences. I really don't know why TV can't get over the fucking dream sequence. We don't care. Honestly. But getting back to the show, while all the actors, especially Tate Donavin, are excellent - and we have some all stars here, from Lily Tomlin's cold turn as mom, Cambell Scott as the son and even Uncle Jun himself, Dominick Chianese as a money launderer - special merit must be given to the best performance of the season: Martin Short as the family lawyer.
I've always loved Martin short from SCTV, to his one solid SNL year, to many of his great insane film roles. And yes, the last few years....not so much. But as this lawyer, Short not only does away with every single comic trick he's developed, he has created an entirely new persona, and maybe one of the most intriguing ones on modern television. He's that good. By underplaying the entire thing, he's brought it to life and given this sad sack the kind of empathy we need to care about him - even though he's kind of a horrible guy. It's Emmy worthy and nothing short of brilliant. Martin Short is stealing the show by not stealing the show.
As for DAMAGES itself, this could be the last season (most likely.) If it is, they are going out on a sky-high note, and bringing back Danson for the end would turn out to be a stroke of luck/genius.
Sesaon 2 really wobbled, season 3 is rock solid. Better than ever.
Grade: A
AMERICAN IDOL (ABC)
I don't really get it this year. I like the guy with the acoustic guitar who did STRAIGHT UP and FOREVER (Andrew Garcia I think?) and some of the girls are okay - but honestly, between Ellen's god-awful jokes and Randy's pathetic "you went too far, now I'm gonna crack-up" laugh when she tells them - to Carla trying to create intrigue by cozying up to Simon, blech. The only compelling thing left here is the end of the doomed love story thats playing out. Soon to be dashed lover Ryan Seacrest occasionally trying to draw fire from Simon since this is Simon's last season. Ryan clearly feels betrayed and it shows. How pathetic and yet wonderful for tv. Thank God there is some drama going on here.
Grade: C -
UPDATE: Ruben and Clay from season 2 are going on tour together! Does anybody really need to see that show?
Well, I actually do.
LOST (ABC)
One of the most compelling dramas on TV has now become the most ambitious, and the drama is suffering from the ambition.
While there is SO much to criticize these days on LOST, and I am talking some REALLY loopy mythology that only makes sense in a writer's room after 4 days of no sleep...there is much to admire.
The ambition and scope of it is admirable, and the acting is top-notch. Especially since most of the actors are having to play year 6 on the island, as well as newly formed characters as part of a flash-sideways (although to be honest...those flash-sideways are supposed to be from the FIRST plane ride - meaning that those flash-sideways are REALLY, flashbacks!)
Anyway, the hour about Ben Linus being a teacher was kind of great, the hour where the Richard Alpert character kills a doctor to get medicine for his wife...not so much. I kind of loved the fact that he sees a doctor who just happens to be evil, who has a potion to cure his wife even though he had never examined the wife, and that this doctor expected a million dollars for the potion from Richard - even though they clearly lived in a poor hovel. Lastly, after Richard gets the potion, he has no idea how to use it so apparantly she just needs to drink it. And the self-reflexive jokes don't help any. And there are plenty of them. Usually delivered by Hurley.
That said - I really like LOST and admire the direction its gone in, even as they've taken away the possibility of death from most of the characters, making the drama a bit toothless. (I have also grown very weary of SUN and her bad angry acting which seems to get worse every season. She's sometimes okay, but when her character is forced to be angry - oh, boy. And she hit her head on a coconut tree and forgot English? Yikes.)
For the moment though, I am goign to leave this to the last few episodes to find out if this ending really ties it all up in a satisfying way. Here's hoping.
Grade: ???
What a fantastic season. I think there are 2 left, but last week I started unspooling these from the DVR. Glenn Close is more brilliant than ever as Patty Hewes. Rose Byrne...still not so much. But less seen and therefore, more effective thise season. She's not a terribly good actress, but the staff seems to have found a better way to posit her into the action this year. Although did we REALLY need her adoption story line in the 3rd leg of this? Also, Ted Danson is back as Arthur Frobisher. It's an incredibly self-reflexive storyline that really pushes the limit of how much your remember season 1 - which is not a great thing to do when you're only in season 3. That said, Danson is good in the role (even though the whole storyline is really dodgy) - it just kind of works. And I do wish they'd do away with the dream sequences. I really don't know why TV can't get over the fucking dream sequence. We don't care. Honestly. But getting back to the show, while all the actors, especially Tate Donavin, are excellent - and we have some all stars here, from Lily Tomlin's cold turn as mom, Cambell Scott as the son and even Uncle Jun himself, Dominick Chianese as a money launderer - special merit must be given to the best performance of the season: Martin Short as the family lawyer.
I've always loved Martin short from SCTV, to his one solid SNL year, to many of his great insane film roles. And yes, the last few years....not so much. But as this lawyer, Short not only does away with every single comic trick he's developed, he has created an entirely new persona, and maybe one of the most intriguing ones on modern television. He's that good. By underplaying the entire thing, he's brought it to life and given this sad sack the kind of empathy we need to care about him - even though he's kind of a horrible guy. It's Emmy worthy and nothing short of brilliant. Martin Short is stealing the show by not stealing the show.
As for DAMAGES itself, this could be the last season (most likely.) If it is, they are going out on a sky-high note, and bringing back Danson for the end would turn out to be a stroke of luck/genius.
Sesaon 2 really wobbled, season 3 is rock solid. Better than ever.
Grade: A
AMERICAN IDOL (ABC)
I don't really get it this year. I like the guy with the acoustic guitar who did STRAIGHT UP and FOREVER (Andrew Garcia I think?) and some of the girls are okay - but honestly, between Ellen's god-awful jokes and Randy's pathetic "you went too far, now I'm gonna crack-up" laugh when she tells them - to Carla trying to create intrigue by cozying up to Simon, blech. The only compelling thing left here is the end of the doomed love story thats playing out. Soon to be dashed lover Ryan Seacrest occasionally trying to draw fire from Simon since this is Simon's last season. Ryan clearly feels betrayed and it shows. How pathetic and yet wonderful for tv. Thank God there is some drama going on here.
Grade: C -
UPDATE: Ruben and Clay from season 2 are going on tour together! Does anybody really need to see that show?
Well, I actually do.
LOST (ABC)
One of the most compelling dramas on TV has now become the most ambitious, and the drama is suffering from the ambition.
While there is SO much to criticize these days on LOST, and I am talking some REALLY loopy mythology that only makes sense in a writer's room after 4 days of no sleep...there is much to admire.
The ambition and scope of it is admirable, and the acting is top-notch. Especially since most of the actors are having to play year 6 on the island, as well as newly formed characters as part of a flash-sideways (although to be honest...those flash-sideways are supposed to be from the FIRST plane ride - meaning that those flash-sideways are REALLY, flashbacks!)
Anyway, the hour about Ben Linus being a teacher was kind of great, the hour where the Richard Alpert character kills a doctor to get medicine for his wife...not so much. I kind of loved the fact that he sees a doctor who just happens to be evil, who has a potion to cure his wife even though he had never examined the wife, and that this doctor expected a million dollars for the potion from Richard - even though they clearly lived in a poor hovel. Lastly, after Richard gets the potion, he has no idea how to use it so apparantly she just needs to drink it. And the self-reflexive jokes don't help any. And there are plenty of them. Usually delivered by Hurley.
That said - I really like LOST and admire the direction its gone in, even as they've taken away the possibility of death from most of the characters, making the drama a bit toothless. (I have also grown very weary of SUN and her bad angry acting which seems to get worse every season. She's sometimes okay, but when her character is forced to be angry - oh, boy. And she hit her head on a coconut tree and forgot English? Yikes.)
For the moment though, I am goign to leave this to the last few episodes to find out if this ending really ties it all up in a satisfying way. Here's hoping.
Grade: ???
2010/04/05
South Park, Kate Perry, The Office, 30 Rock, Grey Gardens & Celeb Apprentice
Kate Perry: Unplugged (MTV)
The absolutely luminous Kate Perry kicks this off with a great re-working of I KISSED A GIRL and goes on to thoughtfuly talk about her new songs, some old song, her life and her artistic process. She's beautiful, she's great and she's funny. And while I'm not super familiar with all the cuts on her debut CD, I love the acoustic treatment she gives them here.
Grade: B
THE OFFICE (NBC)
I love Ed Helms. I think he's the best thing to happen to this show.
GREY GARDENS (HBO)
I know this won all kinds of awards and stuff, but I'm at a loss. Drew Barrymore could not have been more affected. The makeup was horrible. It didn't work. Sorry, really didn't work for me. I gave up after an hour.
Grade: D
30 ROCK (NBC)
Having a very good season. That said, I wish they'd stick more to real office situations and stay less with the more surreal aspects of the show, which sometimes threaten to take over the entire enterprise.
Grade: B +
THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (NBC)
Another great installment with just the right amount of lunacy, Brett Michaels is really coming off as quite the befuddled character out of his ROCK OF LOVE element, and who knew Cyndi Lauper was so crazy/awesome? Sharon Osbourne is surprisingly grounded and ex-Governer Rob Blagojevich is really a scream. I think this is going to be a great edition.
Grade: B +
V (NBC)
Still getting into it...grade forthcoming.
JUSTIFIED (F/X)
Wow, what a difference a few episodes make. While I found the pilot somewhat pedestrian, the following two episodes have been fantastic, and as far as a fun action/adventure hour with some adult dialog and always good acting - look no further.
Grade: B +
MODERN FAMILY (ABC)
While I like this show more and more, some eps are just not up to snuff. Like the one I watched last night with guest star Ed Norton.
SOUTH PARK (COM CEN)
"Scrotum McBoogerBalls"
Fantastic.
"KFC weed episode (forgot the name)"
Unbelievable. The sight of those men jumping along on their balls.....
This is not the best show ever made. It's just a great show having a (so far) unbelievable season.
Grade: A
The absolutely luminous Kate Perry kicks this off with a great re-working of I KISSED A GIRL and goes on to thoughtfuly talk about her new songs, some old song, her life and her artistic process. She's beautiful, she's great and she's funny. And while I'm not super familiar with all the cuts on her debut CD, I love the acoustic treatment she gives them here.
Grade: B
THE OFFICE (NBC)
I love Ed Helms. I think he's the best thing to happen to this show.
GREY GARDENS (HBO)
I know this won all kinds of awards and stuff, but I'm at a loss. Drew Barrymore could not have been more affected. The makeup was horrible. It didn't work. Sorry, really didn't work for me. I gave up after an hour.
Grade: D
30 ROCK (NBC)
Having a very good season. That said, I wish they'd stick more to real office situations and stay less with the more surreal aspects of the show, which sometimes threaten to take over the entire enterprise.
Grade: B +
THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (NBC)
Another great installment with just the right amount of lunacy, Brett Michaels is really coming off as quite the befuddled character out of his ROCK OF LOVE element, and who knew Cyndi Lauper was so crazy/awesome? Sharon Osbourne is surprisingly grounded and ex-Governer Rob Blagojevich is really a scream. I think this is going to be a great edition.
Grade: B +
V (NBC)
Still getting into it...grade forthcoming.
JUSTIFIED (F/X)
Wow, what a difference a few episodes make. While I found the pilot somewhat pedestrian, the following two episodes have been fantastic, and as far as a fun action/adventure hour with some adult dialog and always good acting - look no further.
Grade: B +
MODERN FAMILY (ABC)
While I like this show more and more, some eps are just not up to snuff. Like the one I watched last night with guest star Ed Norton.
SOUTH PARK (COM CEN)
"Scrotum McBoogerBalls"
Fantastic.
"KFC weed episode (forgot the name)"
Unbelievable. The sight of those men jumping along on their balls.....
This is not the best show ever made. It's just a great show having a (so far) unbelievable season.
Grade: A
2010/04/04
ARCHER
HOME DEPOT STORY (CNBC)
I started catching a few of these CNBC docs that take huge businesses and try to figure out what they did right. A lot of them have similar stories in the rags-to-riches sense, but I really liked this edition, I just don't have much to review.
REM: THIS IS NOT A DOCUMENTARY (IFC)
A set the guys did live in....I forget. This was a brush up for the Olympic Stadium CD they did and also they were running through their new CDs set lest. Frankly, I LOVE REM - and I didn't know one song on this thing. If you liked that CD they released at the time of this, you'll probably love this show.
ARCHER (F/X)
Really funny, but very tied to its spy-game genre. If you're not hip on spy films, I suspect you may not appreciate just how well done this is. I am a fan and a lot of this made me laugh out loud.
I started catching a few of these CNBC docs that take huge businesses and try to figure out what they did right. A lot of them have similar stories in the rags-to-riches sense, but I really liked this edition, I just don't have much to review.
REM: THIS IS NOT A DOCUMENTARY (IFC)
A set the guys did live in....I forget. This was a brush up for the Olympic Stadium CD they did and also they were running through their new CDs set lest. Frankly, I LOVE REM - and I didn't know one song on this thing. If you liked that CD they released at the time of this, you'll probably love this show.
ARCHER (F/X)
Really funny, but very tied to its spy-game genre. If you're not hip on spy films, I suspect you may not appreciate just how well done this is. I am a fan and a lot of this made me laugh out loud.
2010/03/20
The Lovely Bones, Undercover Boss and Parnormal Activity.
I am in a real rush so these will not be fully fleshed out. But, for the record - can you fucking BELIEVE this Sandra Bullock/Jesse James shit? Unusual to the say the least. Anyway, on to my cutting edge reviews:
THE LOVELY BONES (DVD Screener)
Better than you might think, this kind of bombed at the box office. Peter Jackson has a great book to rely on here for source material, and the actress playing the young murdered girl (no spoilers - it happens really fast) is both beautiful and evokes the entire idea of wasted youth and people cut down just as they're starting to grow. So does this film make a great rental? Maybe not, but a pretty good one; especially if you have the time. With lots of unexpected twists and great performances, particularly from Stanley Tucci, this is a meaty film with a lot of ambition. Where Jackson really goes wrong is in his handling of the dreamscape sequences from the book. At its heart, the story is a pulpy gritty tale of a girl raped and murdered and somehow, she's around in some sort of purgatory to try and help her family figure out who murdered her (sort of.) What Jackson does is get lost in this visual dreamscapes to the point of where - it almost looks insanely fun to get killed because you get to hang out in a wonderland of snow and magic, while your family grows closer and blossoms. That said, this is still very effective in parts and while not any kind of classic, a story well told, that could've used a 20 minute chop.
Grade: C +
UNDERCOVER BOSS (CBS)
One of my favorite new reality shows, this is the biggest his CBS has had in forever. No wonder. It's that good. The bosses of huge, reconizable companies go undercover to see what's up and meet the people who really work for them on the front lines. Is it partly manipulated and scripted? Completely. Every worked the boss comes into contact with usually has an AMAZING story, they all know they're on film so there is no real UNDERCOVER aspect to this as everyone is probably on their best behavior (Do I really believe that if you went undercover in a Los Angeles 7-11 that the worst thing that would happen is a light bulb would be out? Not bloodly likely - since I knew of a 7-11 that was in close proximity to the one on the TV show - that store's biggest issue is that you could walk in and literally purchase crack-cocaine from the clerk.)
Still, it's an informative, uplifting hour and as long as they stick to big companies (they're starting to get into companies I've never even heard of) this a realy interesting bit of reality tv - which is to say- they pull back the curtain a tad - but not enough to really show anything.
Grade: B
ARCHER (F/X)
I've only seen the pilot thus far but I must say - it was really funny and offbeat. Looks like another winner for F/X.
Grade: B +
PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (DVD Screener)
NO SPOILERS! Suffice it to say this is a study in tension. It's 90 minutes long and if you watch it straight through, I promise a satisfying pay off. And yes, I liked it better than Blair Witch. The non-actors (or rather - actors we've just not ever heard of) are almost pitch-perfect and their banter does sort of lull you into thinking they're not really onto anything. The payoffs here are small, but it works in a big way.
Grade: A -
24 (FOX)
Kind of a dreary season, but with news that it's the final season, suddenly every episode feels very vital.
UPDATE: Hold on the 24 movie franchise, NBC might pick this up for a 9th season.
PS: Freddie Prinze - on this show - fucking sucks.
SOBER HOUSE (VH1)
Nothing compares, nothing compares....to you.
Grade: A
SOUTH PARK (COM CEN) Season Premiere
South Park opens with maybe one of the best eps in its 14 seasons. The subject was rich celebs cheating on their spouses. Laugh out loud funny and of course, very thoughtful on its subject. When this show is on its game - there is nothing better.
Grade: A
Bonus Episode:
Woodland Critters Special
I saw this old ep for the first time the other night - no spoilers and I'm too pressed for time - but it's about Stan coming across a bunch of seemingly harmless woods critters and trying to help them. From there the show gets insane.
Grade: A
JUSTIFIED (F/X)
Wasn't nuts about the pilot, Walton Goggons should be ashamed of himself at this point. How many times is he going to play a dumb hillbilly? And the story didn't really work that well. That said, I love the lead, Tim Olyphant and the supporting cast is pretty excellent. I think this should get much better. And since I have high hopes for this show, I'm going to reserve my grade.
BAD GIRLS REUNION (Part 1) (OXY)
Da bomb. Can't wait for part 2. Nathalie is a HO!
UPDATE: Part 2 was just as insane, and Flo might be the sickest
girl in the house...no, has to be Nathalie.
Perez Hilton does a great job holding the reunion
together.
Grade: A (for lovers of trash TV only)
DR. OZ (Syndicated)
I love this show. They just rush too fast through the subjects. Slow down, Oz. Give an important topic more than 2 minutes. We won't tune out. Every episode seems like he's racing to get to the next segment.
CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (NBC/CNBC)
I just started watching this but so far, I fucking love it. Great cast and I love Cyndi Lauper.
Kimmel was great on Letterman the other night.
Sorry for the short reviews, but my time was limited this week.
THE LOVELY BONES (DVD Screener)
Better than you might think, this kind of bombed at the box office. Peter Jackson has a great book to rely on here for source material, and the actress playing the young murdered girl (no spoilers - it happens really fast) is both beautiful and evokes the entire idea of wasted youth and people cut down just as they're starting to grow. So does this film make a great rental? Maybe not, but a pretty good one; especially if you have the time. With lots of unexpected twists and great performances, particularly from Stanley Tucci, this is a meaty film with a lot of ambition. Where Jackson really goes wrong is in his handling of the dreamscape sequences from the book. At its heart, the story is a pulpy gritty tale of a girl raped and murdered and somehow, she's around in some sort of purgatory to try and help her family figure out who murdered her (sort of.) What Jackson does is get lost in this visual dreamscapes to the point of where - it almost looks insanely fun to get killed because you get to hang out in a wonderland of snow and magic, while your family grows closer and blossoms. That said, this is still very effective in parts and while not any kind of classic, a story well told, that could've used a 20 minute chop.
Grade: C +
UNDERCOVER BOSS (CBS)
One of my favorite new reality shows, this is the biggest his CBS has had in forever. No wonder. It's that good. The bosses of huge, reconizable companies go undercover to see what's up and meet the people who really work for them on the front lines. Is it partly manipulated and scripted? Completely. Every worked the boss comes into contact with usually has an AMAZING story, they all know they're on film so there is no real UNDERCOVER aspect to this as everyone is probably on their best behavior (Do I really believe that if you went undercover in a Los Angeles 7-11 that the worst thing that would happen is a light bulb would be out? Not bloodly likely - since I knew of a 7-11 that was in close proximity to the one on the TV show - that store's biggest issue is that you could walk in and literally purchase crack-cocaine from the clerk.)
Still, it's an informative, uplifting hour and as long as they stick to big companies (they're starting to get into companies I've never even heard of) this a realy interesting bit of reality tv - which is to say- they pull back the curtain a tad - but not enough to really show anything.
Grade: B
ARCHER (F/X)
I've only seen the pilot thus far but I must say - it was really funny and offbeat. Looks like another winner for F/X.
Grade: B +
PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (DVD Screener)
NO SPOILERS! Suffice it to say this is a study in tension. It's 90 minutes long and if you watch it straight through, I promise a satisfying pay off. And yes, I liked it better than Blair Witch. The non-actors (or rather - actors we've just not ever heard of) are almost pitch-perfect and their banter does sort of lull you into thinking they're not really onto anything. The payoffs here are small, but it works in a big way.
Grade: A -
24 (FOX)
Kind of a dreary season, but with news that it's the final season, suddenly every episode feels very vital.
UPDATE: Hold on the 24 movie franchise, NBC might pick this up for a 9th season.
PS: Freddie Prinze - on this show - fucking sucks.
SOBER HOUSE (VH1)
Nothing compares, nothing compares....to you.
Grade: A
SOUTH PARK (COM CEN) Season Premiere
South Park opens with maybe one of the best eps in its 14 seasons. The subject was rich celebs cheating on their spouses. Laugh out loud funny and of course, very thoughtful on its subject. When this show is on its game - there is nothing better.
Grade: A
Bonus Episode:
Woodland Critters Special
I saw this old ep for the first time the other night - no spoilers and I'm too pressed for time - but it's about Stan coming across a bunch of seemingly harmless woods critters and trying to help them. From there the show gets insane.
Grade: A
JUSTIFIED (F/X)
Wasn't nuts about the pilot, Walton Goggons should be ashamed of himself at this point. How many times is he going to play a dumb hillbilly? And the story didn't really work that well. That said, I love the lead, Tim Olyphant and the supporting cast is pretty excellent. I think this should get much better. And since I have high hopes for this show, I'm going to reserve my grade.
BAD GIRLS REUNION (Part 1) (OXY)
Da bomb. Can't wait for part 2. Nathalie is a HO!
UPDATE: Part 2 was just as insane, and Flo might be the sickest
girl in the house...no, has to be Nathalie.
Perez Hilton does a great job holding the reunion
together.
Grade: A (for lovers of trash TV only)
DR. OZ (Syndicated)
I love this show. They just rush too fast through the subjects. Slow down, Oz. Give an important topic more than 2 minutes. We won't tune out. Every episode seems like he's racing to get to the next segment.
CELEBRITY APPRENTICE (NBC/CNBC)
I just started watching this but so far, I fucking love it. Great cast and I love Cyndi Lauper.
Kimmel was great on Letterman the other night.
Sorry for the short reviews, but my time was limited this week.
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