For reasons I can’t get into – I’m taking some time off again. I hope you’ve enjoyed the reviews – at some point I’ll come out of retirement – but probably not for a little while. If you have any questions about anything – feel free to email me – otherwise – will see you on the other side. I tried to get a lot of shows in since this’ll be the one for the road.
Peace and thanks for all the fish.
DIGITAL COUCH out.
10.10.08
THE DEBATES (ABC/CBS/FOX/NBC/CNBC/CSPAN)
I have no interest in sharing my politics here, as I’m sure you have no interest in reading about them. But the actor who plays Obama is fantastic – doing this sort of – straight-man slow-burn while the actor playing McCain is wonderful. He makes McCain sad and pathetic – but very aggressive about his opinions and a bit like a dog wanting his belly scratched. Okay – I was trying something out here that didn’t really work – but basically – it doesn’t matter whose side you’re on – the debates are fucking hilarious. Biden seemed like a patient grade school teacher with a rambunctious young student. Palin seems like a lot of fun. Imagine getting her drunk? And McCain seems like this defeated sad/funny clown while Obama seems bright but about as humorless as they come. And his anger is so subtle. As far as who gets my vote – what do you care? But as for sole entertainment value:
Grade: A +
THE SARAH SILVERMAN SHOW (COMEDY CENTRAL)
Sarah returns with a bong! The first episode charted Sarah’s entry into the world of pot with hilarious results. The thing about leaving herself messages when she’s high – so brilliant – so true – not that I would know. I am SO GLAD this show is back - one my very favorites and Sarah and her talented cast will be a welcome addition this season. And based on the premeire - it's gonna be a great one.
Grade: A +
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (NBC)
Anne Hathaway and The Killers. Is it just me or is this ever-so-slowly getting slightly funnier. I actually laughed a few times and I thought Hathaway was a pretty good guest host. I love that Tina Fey is coming every week thus far to do Palin, and her bit about asking Biden if she can call him Joe, “because I practiced some zingers where I call you Joe” was hilarious. And some of the sketches were legitimately funny – The Killers were GREAT. I’ll tell you who is NOT funny– the new heavy set guy with the curly hair – this week we discovered that he can dance. While I’m not immune to the hilarity of a fat man dancing, I don’t know – they seem to really be pushing him and that woman who started last season whose name I still do not know but seems to fit in okay (I guess also on the heavyset side compared to the other woman.) She’s okay if not memorable – so far, he’s the killer of comedy. Literally.
Grade: B -
LIFE AND TIMES OF TIM (HBO)
Laugh out loud funny, this is one of the best things I’ve ever seen. No review – just watch it. It’s on the dirty side, so live a little.
Grade: A +
UPDATE:
I just watched the 2nd episode. Hilarious. Truly must-see. It’s insane, profane, and perfect.
Grade: A +
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
Continues to be a fairly uninspired effort. This had a couple of funny seasons in it, and I have no doubt that there will be future funny eps – but last season and this new one are anything but.
Grade: C -
GONE COUNTRY (CMT)
After a few mellow episodes, this built to the big show, where everyone had to sing their newly written song in front of a live audience and John Rich picks the winner. It was shocking how close Lorenzo Lamas came to pulling it off, Sean Young at the very least appeared normal and to have a good time, even if she sounded like shit. The guy who used to be in N’synch I thought personally had one of the best songs – but the two guys that had it down to the wire were none other than Jermaine Jackson – who is the sweatiest mother fucker I’ve ever seen, and who – frankly – I didn’t really get his song. But Sebastian Bach had a brilliant song about drinking called BATTLE WITH THE BOTTLE that was actually really good and he ended up winning the competition. This was a good series with a great ending. Looking forward to the next season of this.
Grade: B +
PRISON BREAK (FOX)
Has re-invented itself yet again – now it’s just the best action show – maybe ever. This last episode, with Michael going back to break out Mahone – was one of the best moments of the season. This is a unique show in that it really seemed to have stopped giving a shit about getting new fans and truly plays to the core audience. If you’re not one of them – go out and rent every season – this is THAT good.
Grade: A +
UPDATE: PRISON BREAK – the next episode
I just caught last night. The one in Vegas. Very outrageous, very slick, and there is nothing better than watching Theodore Bagwell (T-Bag) get fucked over. The thing with Sucre and the old man and his wife was priceless.
Grade: A +
THE SHIELD (FX)
What can I say? I’m the biggest fan of this show, but these final episodes are just sort of lacking in almost every way. The writing seems off, the acting is ok, the direction is weird – the storyline – while somewhat rewarding I guess to long time fans of the show, is fairly ridiculous and convoluted. I never really loved the money train season and now this just seems like a big re-do. I don’t believe this phony war Vic started – I REALLY don’t believe the bad acting and improbable situations of Vic’s daughter, Cassidy (played by Vic’s real-life daughter – poor thing. It’s as if someone said “just seem angry and sullen every second and you’ll win an Emmy!” Not only that – but the Billings stuff is worthless, the thing with the young serial killer in training is pretty ridiculous – worst of all, this Fed, played by a shitty actress named Lauren Holden (I’ve actually seen her in a movie from 10 years ago – she was bad then, worse now) is reciting some of the all time worst “tough banter” dialog – this thing is a mess. I think there are 5 eps left. This thing better really have some tricks up its sleeve to regain its good name and go out in style. But I’m not encouraged. It’s still The Shield – but it’s just not working like it used to – in their final season. Here’s hoping things pick up in the last batch of eps, which, if I’m looking at the show historically – they will. I just hope it won’t be too late.
Grade: B –
UPDATE: THE SHIELD (the latest ep)
FINALLY - things are back on track! They FINALLY put an end to the ridiculous Mexican-Armenian war thing – and they brought back some urgency to the storyline with our newest favorite subject of the last few seasons – the Vic/Shane/Lem situation. Last night’s episode was tense and gripping and surprising – I’m now looking forward to the last 5 or 6 original episodes left. They still need to get completely back on track – but they are more than half way there with this terrific episode.
Grade: A -
THE RACHEL ZOE PROJECT (BRAVO)
I have no idea why I like this show so much – I don’t know much about Zoe, except that she’s a polarizing big time designer in NYC and that she’s married and has this very successful design biz. In the few eps I watched, she did outfits for Kate Hudson, Debra Messing and a few others – but the show is more about her day to life, her intereactions with her staff – she has a staff of two. The droll, put-upon Taylor - always seemingly out of patience. And the very gay, very excitable Brad, who has impeccable taste and an impeccable way of getting himself into trouble with Rachel. But, honestly – I don’t find Rachel – who the media really loves to eviscerate – all that bad. She’s completely humorless, but she seems nice enough – she loves what she does and evidently she’s really good at it. And the show is particularly well-produced and frankly, I think gives a lot more info on the fashion world than a lot of other fashion shows. And Rachel is just so….single minded it’s exhilarating to watch her – it’s fun to watch Taylor hating on the insanely likable and loveable Brad – and this is not a horrible way to spend an hour.
Grade: B
TRUE BLOOD (HBO)
The pilot was pretty great. I’m into episode 4 now and it’s still pretty cool. It has the best opening sequence I’ve seen in a long time which sets the tone for a pretty quirky hour. Anna Paquin, so fucking masterful as Holly Hunter’s little girl in THE PIANO has grown up and now sports a country bumpkin accent and resembles a young Amy Poehler. Which is to say she’s not only cute, but there is depth to her performance and I like the portrayal. I even like the idiot brother who keeps getting involved with woman who wind up dead. His “trip” on V-blood was awesome. In fact, I mostly like all the characters. And there are fascinating new Vampire rules and this awesome idea of a Japanese company marketing fake blood to vampires that has all the nutrients of the real thing. Somehow this show got a weird rap – but it’s a fine show and I’m kind of hooked. This is really interesting new work from Alan Ball and I think it’s a really fun and creepy hour. And I suspect it’s going to get even better.
Grade: B +
JIM NORTON: MONSTER RAIN (HBO)
Jim Norton is the real thing. He’s really funny. Really dirty. And shockingly open about his own sexuality and past adventures - or he has a wild imagination. His recounting of a 3-way with Ron Jeremy was insanely funny and humbling – and at the end of the set, he says “I don’t want to get political now at the end of my set, but….” (joke too dirty to be printed here.) Highly recommended.
Grade: B +
JIM NORTON’S DOWN & DIRTY COMIC SHOW (HBO)
This is a series that has Norton hosting a quartet of comedians over the space of an hour. This first hour I watched featured Artie Lange, Jimmy Florentine, Whitney Cummings and Anthony Jeselnik, who was really funny but way too taken with himself. He did have a great opening line though “My family was a lot like the Brady Bunch. My dad died of AIDS.” Great opening, too bad he spent another 10 minutes marveling at his own opening. Whitney Cummings, aside from one good dirty joke regarding her name, was pretty useless. Jimmy Florentine was worth the price of admission as he masterfully tore through a hilariously profane set, and Artie Lange closed with a less dirty, but very funny set. Norton himself is awesome – and the show actually has the timing and vibe of being in one of those clubs with these dirty minded comics. Pretty awesome.
Grade: A
DEXTER (SHOWTIME)
Opened its season with a first rate episode that sets up the entire arc of the season. I thought DEXTER had a really good first year, and in some ways, even a better 2nd year. I still think the sister is a bad actress, but she’s slightly less annoying this year. Jimmy Smits, who I thought ruined NYPD BLUE, was terrific in the pilot and the whole idea of Dexter killing somebody by accident is a great way to start the season. Looks like another thrilling ride.
Grade: A
UPDATE: Episode 2
Not so much. Seemed to go through the paces in a rather clumsy way, and set up a real credibility problem with the plot. Also – Smits’ acting got a lot worse and his “accent” – I don’t know what the fuck he’s up to. And the sister is so bad in ep 2, it almost had to be seen to be believed. Lastly, who’s responsible for the horrendous haircut Dexter’s sporting?
Grade: B -
HOLE IN THE WALL (FOX)
This is kind of cool, for a minute. The coolest part of the show is when the hole comes out of the wall and the person tries – almost always unsuccessfully – to shape themselves like the hole – and it just happens so fast. It’s really funny and wild – for about 30 minutes.
Grade: C-
90210 (THE CW)
Well, now that Brenda left in typical fashion – they went out of their way to have her remain the bitch we always thought she was – it’s just Kelly and the cast of newbies. Sorry, no can do. The sensibility seems…off. But then again, to be fair, I liked watching the old characters. I wish they would just gather the old actors back and have it just be about them. But I hated that they made Brenda a total bitch again – as if she hasn’t grown in years – maybe the actress hasn’t – I have no idea – but certainly you wish for more from these characters. Oh, the rest of the show – unwatchable.
Grade: D
RED BELT (DVD)
The newest David Mamet film deals with mixed martial-arts. Like many a Mamet film, there is a House Of Games structure to this, and getting there is most of the fun. I’ve never seen the lead before but he was great. All the Mamet regulars are here like Joe Mantegna, etc – but the real surprise is how good Tim Allen is as a humorless action star. The last half hour of this gets a little strained and Mamet never seems to figure out how to shoot action – a real shame because it mars the ending of this film. But up until then, this is a pretty neat ride.
Grade: B -
JUST FOR FUN: Grades on Mamet movies: (these are just films written & directed by Mamet – so no GLENGARRY)
HOUSE OF GAMES: A +
THINGS CHANGE: B +
HOMICIDE: C
OLEANA: B
THE WINSLOW BOY: C
STATE & MAIN: B +
THE DEWEY COX STORY (SPECIAL UNRATED 2 DISC DVD)
If you loved this movie like I did, this is a great way to enjoy it. Not only does it contain both the theatrical and unrated versions (called “the unbearably long director’s cut”) but has great commentary from all the principals, great shorts, Apatow disc regulars like line-o-rama and a crazy amount of deleted or extended scenes. Best of all, there’s a whole Dewey Cox concert on disc 2 not really seen in the movie. This is a great, funny film that I think will find its audience. Highly underrated and highly recommended.
Grade: A
INVINCIBLE (HBO)
Inspired by the true story of Vince Papale, Marky Mark Wahlburg plays a man with nothing to lose who ignores staggering odds and makes his dreams of football glory come true. When the coach (Greg Kinnear – very good) of hometown football team hosted an unprecedented open tryout, the public consensus was that it was a waste of time -- no one good enough to play professional football was going to be found this way. Certainly no one like Papale -- a down-on-his-luck, 30 year-old, substitute teacher and part-time bartender who never even played college football. He also had a failing marriage and no visible means of income. In one humiliated scene, his phone is turned off but he suits up and goes to school to do his sub-teacher bit, and they tell him they tried to call but that they won’t be needing him this summer. Then his wife, convinced he’ll never become anything – leaves him. But against these odds, Papale made the team and soon found himself living every fan's fantasy -- moving from his cheap seats in the upper deck to standing on the field as a professional football player. This is a good but not great movie with a great soundtrack and some serious allusions of being an adult RUDY – but this is no RUDY – it’s just kind of okay. It just never really takes flight.
Grade: B –
CALIFORNICATION (SHOWTIME)
Got off to a rousing start with an episode that picks up shortly after least season’s finale. Hank is now back with his ex-wife when he “accidently” goes down on another girl. Evan Handler is solid as Hank’s agent, and the show seemed to gel right off the bat this season. Still not crazy about the actress that plays Evan Handler’s wife, but otherwise, this is a first class offering about one of the most depraved characters on television. God bless Showtime for letting the creators run free with this stuff.
Grade: A
I just watched the CHRISTIAN THE LION youtube video and God – that has to be the best minute of media out there. I swear to God.
AT THE MOVIES (ABC – NEW VERSION)
I was at football Sunday and there was a discussion about whether or not this new version – without the endorsement of series creator Roger Ebert and series long-stay Richard Roeper (who reportedly has his own review series in the works – don’t hold your breath) but I have to admit – I think the new version is just fine. I like the reviewers even if they are a bit young and inexperienced. I like the round up they do on one movie a week where they talk to a whole bunch of critics over one film – and so far, so good. It’s essentially the same show with a bit more sexiness thrown in – frankly, I preferred Siskel & Ebert – their bickering over films was one of the high points of the show. But that ship has sailed. I wished the new version would’ve starred Roeper and my favorite stand-in critic, A.O. Scott (I went to sleepaway camp with him) – but the new guys are okay and this is still a great way to find out about the new weeks releases.
Grade: B
Reality TV hit a brand new low with the absolutely wretched, God-Awful PARIS HILTONS’S NEW BFF.
I AM LEGEND (DVD – AND ALTERNATE ENDING)
I recently re-watched this film (most of it) on HBO. My friend R.C. asked me to check out the “alternate ending.” Look, I really liked this movie – but I’ve now seen 3 “alternate endings” and they’re all kind of the same. The film – still rocks. I did a little research on the book, and found out that I AM LEGEND, the original novel, was the basis for most Hollywood zombie films and even preceded George A. Romero’s NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD.
Grade: A -
Just for fun, let’s review the Romero films:
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD: A +
DAWN OF THE DEAD (1979) A +
DAY OF THE DEAD (1985) B +
DAWN OF THE DEAD (remake) B +
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (Savini 90s remake) B (script by Romero!)
KNIGHTRIDERS (Romero): A +
THE CRAZIES: C
MARTIN: B
THE DARK HALF: D
MONKEY SHINES: B -
NEW YORK GOES HOLLYWOOD (VH1)
Taylor Made shows up. Then he angrily storms off. New York goes to an audition and gets it (sort of.) The producers offer her “I LOVE NEW YORK 3” – and overall, this thing didn’t quite live up to its potential. It felt like it needed to get deeper into NY – but there may not be all much there. I think her best bet is to do another I LOVE NY and involve her insane mother again. Tiffany is still some kind of star and this series did have plenty of great moments – but I’m ready for I LOVE NY 3!
Grade: B -
THE 25th AVN PORN AWARDS (SHOWTIME)
The real news here is that I think this was the 2nd or 3rd time that AVN has actually broadcast the event, which makes it almost sort of mainstream. In a way. Anyway – the awards, the stars – it’s all pretentious and laughable and hilarious for all the wrong reasons. To see an actress come up and deliver a truly inspirational speech about being awarded “Best Anal” is something to see. They also had a major Howard Stern show contingency on hand. First, the MC of the show is the great Greg Fitszimmons, a regular on the Stern show, a GREAT comic and he also has his own show under Howard’s umbrella channel. Greg was REALLY funny, but then it was just as funny to see him have to trade barbs with porn stars like…Anal Cassidy – seriously – and his perfect comic timing mixed with these porn stars horrific comic timing and mispronciation of the jokes – that was pretty funny in itself. Then they bring out Artie Lange – who not only looked really embarrassed to be there, but somehow got roped into doing this absolutely ridiculously unfunny and awful bit where he introduces Nick Manning – I can’t say what was said because it was way pornographic, but it wasn’t funny and it seemed like Artie was there as a favor to someone. And probably for the free trip to Vegas. Then they even brought out Richard Christy and Benji Bronc – two more Stern regulars, for a truly unfunny bit that I can’t even remember. By the time Chi Chi Larue took the stage with this unfunny drag queen shtick – I had had enough.
Grade: C
I love the new Bruce Springsteen song “The Wrestler” which Ally L. sent me the mp3 of. It’s probably one of my favorite recent Bruce songs, and if the Mickey Rourke film about a worn down wrestler is half as good as the song, I can understand why it was a festival sensation. It was directed by the brilliant Darren Aronofsky (Requiem for a Dream) and I can’t wait to see it. But I love that fucking song.
How bad is that video that seems to be everywhere for Kelly Pickler’s “Beautiful?” She’s talking to all these kids about how beautiful their body image should be – and she sings it while flaunting the flotation device tits she had surgically installed last year!!!! Now don’t get me wrong – I have NO PROBLEM with Kelly’s enhanced boobage – frankly, I like it – but let’s not be hypocritical, either. The song is okay – I just don’t know why she felt – okay, this is a ridiculous item. Forget I said anything.
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Something about Peter not being able to stop singing “the bird is the word” – I don’t remember much else about it.
Grade: B –
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
A sub-par tale about Bart getting ahold of Dennis Leary’s cell phone.
Grade: C –
SOUTH PARK (COMEDY CENTRAL – isn’t that a weird fucking name for a network?)
A sub-par tale about Cartman being racist against the Chinese – I couldn’t finish it. This show is sometimes brilliant – not this time.
Grade: C –
CHRIS ROCK: Kill the Messenger (HBO)
Very good show. The rap on Rock is that every other special is great. His first BRING THE PAIN was legendary. Frankly his next two – not so great. But then his 4th special “Never Scared” was da bomb. In this, his 5th special – HBO went through the trouble of taping the same routine in London, New York and South Africa – which means that in the middle of routines, they cut to a different locale of Chris with a different audience and a different outfit – but doing the same bit. This innovative idea was cool for about five minutes, then got in the way and really distracted from what was a very very funny set. Not as good as BRING THE PAIN, not quite on the same level as NEVER SCARED, but in that top three. He’s a funny mother fucker, I just wasn’t crazy about all the weird jump cutting. But his routines on the election were really good. His ideas about sex and orgasms were hilarious – and hopefully next time they’ll just present a complete show. Still, this is not to be missed. This is one of our very best comedians working today in great form.
Grade: B +
There is a lot of stuff I never got to review here, but I still have every GENERATION KILL on my dvr, I still have last week’s HOUSE, I’m looking forward to CRASH on STARZ, looking forward to LIFE ON MARS – and I just got the DVDs of WE OWN THE NIGHT and FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL which I heard was really good, and I’m sorry, but again – this is the end of the line for this blog for the moment. I’m always here via email here at TheDigitalCouch@aol.com
Thanks again for reading all these years and I’m sure we’ll meet again.
Sincerely yours,
Digital Couch.
2008/10/10
2008/10/04
JZ leaves GLAM GOD! The fix is in!
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (NBC)
Was not horrible this week. Tina Fey was funny as Sarah Palin. There were some funny sketches. I already forgot who hosted but I remember Duffy being kind of great. Is this show every going to be great again? It’s been five or so years since they’ve had a decent season. Hmm…and Seth Myers was made head writer a few years ago….
Grade: C -
GLAM GOD (VH1)
Wha’ happened! So long, Jess! JZ finally got the boot even though I liked her designs a lot better than some of those that stayed – but still, she came in fifth place! She should’ve won, but – this is a reality show. By the way, for those of you watching – how much of a fucking douchebag is Ignashio, the constipated odd looking bald buck-toothed bi-sexual cowboy? If he wins it must be because they all felt sorry for him. Still, Jess went out in great style and humor, and in the mind of the DIGITAL COUCH, Jess wins!
Grade: A
Jess Zaino: A+
WEEDS (SHOWTIME)
After a reinvented season where the focus of the show was a little unclear, WEEDS turns out to have many tricks up its sleeve in its last batch of first run episodes. The last three eps of this were absolutely hilarious, profane, morally ambiguous and terrifically exciting. With a doozey of a cliffhanger and many situations resolved and new ones revived (does Andy really love Nancy?) – I can hardly wait for season 6. Who knew after 5 seasons this show had this much life left in it? Kudos to the creative team for allowing the show to evolve to this point. Mary Louise Parker continues to amaze as Nancy Botwin. And Kevin Nealon brought his character to an all new low this season – fantastic.
Grade: A
BRIAN WILSON “LUCKY OLD SUN” (AUDIO CD)
Kind of a cool concept CD without many great songs. It’s short – on the 32 minute side – and there are flashes of old Beach Boys genius in the air – but really, this feels more like a one-off novelty than anything else. Not as good as SMILE and nowhere near as good as his 86’ self-titled masterpiece, BRIAN WILSON.
Grade: C
THE EMMY AWARDS (ABC)
This is not good. A few people scored. Bob Hope, Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, Jimmy Kimmel, Ricky Gervais….can’t think of anyone else. Most of it was unwatchable – the 5 hosts looked so insanely out of place that they should’ve probably been replaced during the broadcast. You know things are bad when Ryan Seacrest comes off as the most polished. But don’t blame them – blame the guy who thought that putting 5 reality hosts to run the Emmys was a good idea. The Josh Groban thing with him singing all the themes – well, that was just unfortunate and I’m sorry we all had to witness that. The DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES bullshit presentation made me sick and that weird move of Marcia Cross kissing Dana Delaney – it was just really cringe inducing. I’ve been watching the Emmys since I have been watching TV, and last night’s show was even worse than last year – which was the worst of all time. ABC – just imagine if you had your late night host - Jimmy Kimmel, did a superb job with NIGHT OF STARS - imagine if you had that guy actually hosting your show? Kathy Griffin was embarrassing, as was a dazed looking Christian Slater. As the night wore on, the jokes – those bad fucking jokes – they just grew worse and worse, and once again, THE AMAZING RACE won the Emmy for like – the 5th time in a row. Have you seen the show? It’s good but – 6 times? Is it THAT AMAZING? And Bryan Cranston over Jon Hamm? What is up with that??? Lastly, Heidi Klum might be the worst Emmy host, ever. She's fine on Project Runway - but my God, she was no camera-ready last Sunday night.
Grade: D
JIMMY KIMMEL’S NIGHT OF STARS (ABC)
In a zany take off of the pre-Oscar Barbara Walters special, Jimmy interviews a bunch of celebs but rather than a straight forward approach, this is satire in which Jimmy satirizes Walters in an attempt to get these celebs to cry. He was hilarious with Mike Phelps, asking him if there was a “little mermaid” in his life. The interview also included a hysterical parody of GREYS ANATOMY starring Phelps that’s probably making the rounds on YOUTUBE if you want to see it. When he introduced Tracey Morgan, he claimed that the job on SNL “got his family off welfare – 8 months later.” He also added that for 30 ROCK, Tracey was “almost nominated for an Emmy.” He even made Mr. Morgan cry, which lead to a tender embrace. He then egged Tracey on to destroy the set of “How I Married Your Mother” screaming about “Doogie Houser!” Morgan followed suit – with a baseball bat to that set. Ben Stein made a funny appearance, followed by a hilarious one-on-one with Selma Hayek that lead to a great singing duet between Jimmy and Selma in which Jimmy kept pleading for Selma to take her shirt off. That lead to a full blown musical number which probably should’ve been included in the actual Emmy telecast. The show concluded with Jimmy interviewing the 5 reality show hosts about what they planned for the Emmys – which was much funnier than anything the useless reality hosts actually did on the actual show. Why ABC didn’t just have Jimmy host the awards show is beyond me, but even if he does next year, I’d still love to see this hour become a perennial.
Grade: A +
MAD MEN (AMC)
Don Draper is finally called out on his bullshit by his wife. Jon Hamm is so good in this role it saddens me that I published a blog a few months ago that referred to Jon as PETER HAMM. My apologies to Jon – as he’s one of my very favorite actors working today and his performance not only should’ve taken home the Emmy Sunday night, but he’s now created the most interesting character on TV since Tony Soprano. And this show, by getting into some of the other characters and constantly upping the ante of what’s come before, has again become the event of the season.
Grade: A +
OASIS “NEW CD” (AUDIO CD)
I went into this skeptically. I’ve been a huge fan of OASIS since WONDERWALL and the MORNING GLORY CD. I even stayed with them through their last few worthless CDs. Up until about 3 CDs ago, they still managed to pull off a cool song here and there. But the last few yielded not one memorable tune. Not one. They went from cool pop songs with a Beatles-esque flair to bad harder-rock with useless Beatles-esque flairs. This new CD, their newest in years – blows. Hard. Not one fucking likable song. Well – there is ONE song that comes close to reminding me of why I used to love this band in the first place. But it’s not even that good. This is like – Dylan’s 80s period – just a string of one useless CD after the other. And they are so arrogant that when they go on tour they refuse to play the songs we like, opting for a full recreation of their latest piece of garbage. This new CD is basically like – hard guitar rock mixed with every old Beatles sound-effect that they could take out of context and drop it into their music as if would breathe life into this most careless collection. Track 5 is the only redeemable moment in this turgid hour. Will they ever make a good record again?
Grade: D –
THAT ONE SONG: B -
DANCING WITH THE STARS (ABC)
Ted McGinley got old and started wearing a very strange wig. But very likable. Jeff Ross was funny, Kim Kardashian looked downright retarded, with that strange bob of a haircut and her cold facial expressions. Chloris Leachman was funny, Susan Lucci was not. Brooke Burke might be the most dazzling woman on planet earth. But I can’t review the dancing – I truly know nothing of dance. I can only review the overall impact of the show. And I’ve always liked DANCING best when they give us what we want – true B-listers slumming it and making us remember what we loved about them while showing us how graceful they are. But this season, it seems like I don’t know half of these “stars” and to be honest – once the people I know are gone, I don’t stick around to find out who wins.
Grade: C
UPDATE: Now Kim Kardashian is gone. So am I.
BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
I think the reason I’ve been so hard on this show over the years is because it comes so frustratingly close to being great, yet it absolutely refuses to yield it’s “comedy” to let the drama breathe. And yes, there are moments of true wit, and yes, Spader and Shatner truly have unbelievable chemistry. But imagine if this had been set in the real world instead of this post-Ally McBeal weirdo universe. I remember the last season of McBeal, when a character would walk in the room they had this sort of, sound-off of all the character tics. The one guy would whistle, the dragon lady would hiss, someone would swoop their necks – all in drama-killing sound effects. This is essentially the same show with a classier cast and issue-oriented cases (mostly.) Shatner is great as Denny Crane, but they overplay his shtick shamelessly. James Spader, who seems to be finally underplaying Alan just a little bit, is undeniably great as Alan – but this show – in its last season, never cared enough about these characters to draw a real storyline – it’s just like, bad sitcom ideas with some juicy courtroom drama. Anyway, I’m sure I will watch this season to see what happens – but, if only the producers would just trust the acting and the stories to carry this instead of the Catskills Comedy vibe that infects every episode.
Grade: C +
UPDATE: BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
So – fucking BOSTON LEGAL bounced back the next week with an insanely good story that tackled the voting age, a little girl’s rape and a case against the big pharmaceutical companies – and it was great. They even made some inside jokes about this being their last year (Shatner asked “Can’t we try another time slot?”) but I have to admit – this was a great, gripping episode that definitely showed why Shatner and Spader have walked off with so many Emmys.
Grade: B +
TaLK TO ME (HBO)
Don Cheadle stars as real-life radio trailblazer Ralph "Petey" Greene, a high-school dropout and charismatic ex-con who leveraged a prison disc jockey gig into a stint at a Washington, D.C., radio station, a television show and an invitation to the White House. Don Cheadle is electrifying in the role, and the first hour of this film, which charts Greene’s ascension from Jail to radio star is fantastic. And then the film takes a completely unexpected turn (at least to me) and becomes less electrifying but very interesting. The supporting cast is stellar, and I personally thought this was going to be some kind of Howard Stern PRIVATE PARTS retread – but it’s completely original and real and highly recommended.
Grade: B
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 3rd episode)
Vince agrees to come to a sweet 16 for an appearance fee and Ari gets into an escalating war with his long time rival agent, Davies. This was the best of the first batch of 5th season eps, and the sweet 16 girl was hilarious and the place that Ari’s war goes was surprising, although – Ari is seen without his car at the end saying “there was a problem” that seemed to get left on the cutting room floor. Still – this was a particularly good episode.
Grade: A -
UPDATE: Next Episdoe.
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 4th episode)
Finally, after all that talk and wish fulfillment of the boys – we are returning to my favorite topic of ENTOURAGE – the art of the deal. This ep, which had Ari and Vince trying to sell SMOKEJUMPERS while E. tried to weasel out of his commitment to Vince’s old agent (I forget her name) – was awesome. Not a huge fan of Giavani Ribisi – but otherwise – these are killer eps.
Grade: A
DON’T FORGET THE LYRICS! (FOX)
The only thing more annoying than the two singing sisters was Wayne Brady himself. I would probably like this show if not for Brady. He’s either the most useless, phoniest guy in Hollywood, or just doing a great impression of it. The two sisters on the show I watched were so unbearable, seriously – did anybody see them? Yet I love the idea of this show. Replace the host and I’d watch it every week. Wayne Brady is to comedy what Adolph Hitler is to comedy.
Grade: C -
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Chef Ramsey had his toughest challenge yet with an incredibly arrogant young chef, and this continues to be one of the best reality shows on TV. Every episode is usually packed with great stuff and Ramsey is a great reality star. Funny, quick witted and real – although I still think the wrong person won last summers HELL’S KITCHEN.
Grade: A
ER (NBC)
ER debuted to their 15th and final season with a frantic and somber tale about Greg Pratt, who’s been on the show for 7 seasons. No spoilers – but this was as harrowing and tense hour as the show has had in a long time.
Grade B +
THE OFFICE ( NBC)
Would do you say about a show that believes itself to be the funniest show on television, but – in actuality – is one of the least funny shows on television?
Grade: C –
WAITRESS (HBO)
I loved this movie. I loved the story, I loved the theme – I especially loved the dialog. The dialog was as good as it gets in a wistful tale like this. At one point, Kerri Russel, who plays the married pregnant lead perfectly (and seems light years away from her FELICITY role,) is having this sort-of platonic relationship with a married man and they talk a lot in these scenes but it’s great talk. Kerri says in a VOICE OVER: “I became addicted to talking to him. And addicted to my words meaning something to someone.” The life observations in this are also real, shrewd and dead-on. At one point, Russel’s oafish husband, played to absolute perfection by Jeremy Sisto, doing yet another totally original take on the asshole, is having sex with her and asks her to talk dirty. She replies “what do you want me to…” and she’s interrupted by him finishing. This is just a great film and I really loved every single second of it. The director and co-star, Adrien Shelley did a superb job with this film, and days before its release she was killed in her apartment by a construction worker she had a beef with. I’m sketchy on the exact details – but – Jesus. In any case, I doubt she’d want the review to focus on her death, but if felt irresponsible not to mention it. Either way, she left behind 3 kids, a husband and a perfect film.
Grade: A+
IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA (FX)
I always thought this show tried way too hard to be funny and endearing. I recently watched a fresh batch of eps and found that I’m still right – except that the show is a bit more funny and endearing than I initially gave it credit for. Either they’ve really improved, or they’re simply more confident now in their storytelling and point of view. Danny Devito, such an 80s sitcom star – is completely reinvented as the wretched father and even though the main cast still tries a bit too hard - it all sort of works much better now and I will be watching and maybe catching up with some previous episodes. I sort of like the audacity of the stories even if I’m not always crazy about the execution.
Grade: B
KIMMEL LIVE! (ABC)
Jimmy had a really funny sketch on the other night – first they showed Matt Damon talking really vaguely about Sarah Palin and how it’s like a bad Disney movie –then they put a faux promo together that – this is impossible to explain – but really funny. Jon Hamm was on the same show and was hilarious with Jimmy.
Grade: A
IN BRUGES (DVD)
A very slow start that builds to a real depth in this look at these 2 hitmen who are laying low In Bruges after they’ve just completed some hit. It’s not at all an issue based film, but rather – it’s rumination on friendship and violence, movie violence – but it does so entertainingly and even wistfully. This is a rather unusual film in which there is nothing I can think of in recent memory that really compares to it. It’s truly unique and original and it will stay with you longer than you suspect. And by the way – Colin Farrell – best role of his career. Rest of the fairly unknown cast is as good – just can’t remember all their names. Highly recommended.
Grade: B +
BILL MAHR (HBO)
Is a great show, but did he really have to call Sarah Palin a bimbo? What is he?
Grade: A
OUTSIDERS INN (CMT)
So fucking ridiculous. So overly and obviously badly scripted. It started out okay – but by now, the 5th episode in, you literally can’t believe what you’re watching and how contrived, set up and god-awful the whole production is. You have these insane incidents that would NEVER happen in real life, then you have the three idiots, Bobby Brown, Maureen McCormick (Marcia Brady) and Carnie Wilson doing testimonials about there “night in jail.” (Because Maureen – in an insultingly scripted scene – was dancing with a cowboy in this empty bar when their central-casting hussies came by to make trouble and Maureen announced “Let’s throw down now!”) Then they got taken to the slammer. So you had Marcia Brady and Carnie Wilson complaining about being in jail because Maureen doesn’t back down from a fight….this is a fucking insult and everyone involved with this show should be arrested.
Grade: F -
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Reminded us why it’s one of the best half hours on Fox with their season premiere, in an episode that had Brian dressed as Snoopy (along with a Woodstock to complete the profane joke that followed,) Brian having sex with a civilian while Stewie proved himself to be more of a freak than ever, and ended with Cleveland (soon to be star of his own series) complaining that having sex with that woman is something he will never forget – she left him a genital wart. Brian and Cleveland looked at each other a long time after Cleveland revealed the information – and then Cleveland said “It hurts.”
Grade: A
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
Another winner – from the 20th season premiere. Ned and Homer became bounty hunters and Marge took to baking for an erotic bakery. While I think they missed about half the jokes re: the bakery – this show, after all these years, is still rock solid.
Grade: A
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
Not so much.
Grade: C -
Was not horrible this week. Tina Fey was funny as Sarah Palin. There were some funny sketches. I already forgot who hosted but I remember Duffy being kind of great. Is this show every going to be great again? It’s been five or so years since they’ve had a decent season. Hmm…and Seth Myers was made head writer a few years ago….
Grade: C -
GLAM GOD (VH1)
Wha’ happened! So long, Jess! JZ finally got the boot even though I liked her designs a lot better than some of those that stayed – but still, she came in fifth place! She should’ve won, but – this is a reality show. By the way, for those of you watching – how much of a fucking douchebag is Ignashio, the constipated odd looking bald buck-toothed bi-sexual cowboy? If he wins it must be because they all felt sorry for him. Still, Jess went out in great style and humor, and in the mind of the DIGITAL COUCH, Jess wins!
Grade: A
Jess Zaino: A+
WEEDS (SHOWTIME)
After a reinvented season where the focus of the show was a little unclear, WEEDS turns out to have many tricks up its sleeve in its last batch of first run episodes. The last three eps of this were absolutely hilarious, profane, morally ambiguous and terrifically exciting. With a doozey of a cliffhanger and many situations resolved and new ones revived (does Andy really love Nancy?) – I can hardly wait for season 6. Who knew after 5 seasons this show had this much life left in it? Kudos to the creative team for allowing the show to evolve to this point. Mary Louise Parker continues to amaze as Nancy Botwin. And Kevin Nealon brought his character to an all new low this season – fantastic.
Grade: A
BRIAN WILSON “LUCKY OLD SUN” (AUDIO CD)
Kind of a cool concept CD without many great songs. It’s short – on the 32 minute side – and there are flashes of old Beach Boys genius in the air – but really, this feels more like a one-off novelty than anything else. Not as good as SMILE and nowhere near as good as his 86’ self-titled masterpiece, BRIAN WILSON.
Grade: C
THE EMMY AWARDS (ABC)
This is not good. A few people scored. Bob Hope, Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, Jimmy Kimmel, Ricky Gervais….can’t think of anyone else. Most of it was unwatchable – the 5 hosts looked so insanely out of place that they should’ve probably been replaced during the broadcast. You know things are bad when Ryan Seacrest comes off as the most polished. But don’t blame them – blame the guy who thought that putting 5 reality hosts to run the Emmys was a good idea. The Josh Groban thing with him singing all the themes – well, that was just unfortunate and I’m sorry we all had to witness that. The DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES bullshit presentation made me sick and that weird move of Marcia Cross kissing Dana Delaney – it was just really cringe inducing. I’ve been watching the Emmys since I have been watching TV, and last night’s show was even worse than last year – which was the worst of all time. ABC – just imagine if you had your late night host - Jimmy Kimmel, did a superb job with NIGHT OF STARS - imagine if you had that guy actually hosting your show? Kathy Griffin was embarrassing, as was a dazed looking Christian Slater. As the night wore on, the jokes – those bad fucking jokes – they just grew worse and worse, and once again, THE AMAZING RACE won the Emmy for like – the 5th time in a row. Have you seen the show? It’s good but – 6 times? Is it THAT AMAZING? And Bryan Cranston over Jon Hamm? What is up with that??? Lastly, Heidi Klum might be the worst Emmy host, ever. She's fine on Project Runway - but my God, she was no camera-ready last Sunday night.
Grade: D
JIMMY KIMMEL’S NIGHT OF STARS (ABC)
In a zany take off of the pre-Oscar Barbara Walters special, Jimmy interviews a bunch of celebs but rather than a straight forward approach, this is satire in which Jimmy satirizes Walters in an attempt to get these celebs to cry. He was hilarious with Mike Phelps, asking him if there was a “little mermaid” in his life. The interview also included a hysterical parody of GREYS ANATOMY starring Phelps that’s probably making the rounds on YOUTUBE if you want to see it. When he introduced Tracey Morgan, he claimed that the job on SNL “got his family off welfare – 8 months later.” He also added that for 30 ROCK, Tracey was “almost nominated for an Emmy.” He even made Mr. Morgan cry, which lead to a tender embrace. He then egged Tracey on to destroy the set of “How I Married Your Mother” screaming about “Doogie Houser!” Morgan followed suit – with a baseball bat to that set. Ben Stein made a funny appearance, followed by a hilarious one-on-one with Selma Hayek that lead to a great singing duet between Jimmy and Selma in which Jimmy kept pleading for Selma to take her shirt off. That lead to a full blown musical number which probably should’ve been included in the actual Emmy telecast. The show concluded with Jimmy interviewing the 5 reality show hosts about what they planned for the Emmys – which was much funnier than anything the useless reality hosts actually did on the actual show. Why ABC didn’t just have Jimmy host the awards show is beyond me, but even if he does next year, I’d still love to see this hour become a perennial.
Grade: A +
MAD MEN (AMC)
Don Draper is finally called out on his bullshit by his wife. Jon Hamm is so good in this role it saddens me that I published a blog a few months ago that referred to Jon as PETER HAMM. My apologies to Jon – as he’s one of my very favorite actors working today and his performance not only should’ve taken home the Emmy Sunday night, but he’s now created the most interesting character on TV since Tony Soprano. And this show, by getting into some of the other characters and constantly upping the ante of what’s come before, has again become the event of the season.
Grade: A +
OASIS “NEW CD” (AUDIO CD)
I went into this skeptically. I’ve been a huge fan of OASIS since WONDERWALL and the MORNING GLORY CD. I even stayed with them through their last few worthless CDs. Up until about 3 CDs ago, they still managed to pull off a cool song here and there. But the last few yielded not one memorable tune. Not one. They went from cool pop songs with a Beatles-esque flair to bad harder-rock with useless Beatles-esque flairs. This new CD, their newest in years – blows. Hard. Not one fucking likable song. Well – there is ONE song that comes close to reminding me of why I used to love this band in the first place. But it’s not even that good. This is like – Dylan’s 80s period – just a string of one useless CD after the other. And they are so arrogant that when they go on tour they refuse to play the songs we like, opting for a full recreation of their latest piece of garbage. This new CD is basically like – hard guitar rock mixed with every old Beatles sound-effect that they could take out of context and drop it into their music as if would breathe life into this most careless collection. Track 5 is the only redeemable moment in this turgid hour. Will they ever make a good record again?
Grade: D –
THAT ONE SONG: B -
DANCING WITH THE STARS (ABC)
Ted McGinley got old and started wearing a very strange wig. But very likable. Jeff Ross was funny, Kim Kardashian looked downright retarded, with that strange bob of a haircut and her cold facial expressions. Chloris Leachman was funny, Susan Lucci was not. Brooke Burke might be the most dazzling woman on planet earth. But I can’t review the dancing – I truly know nothing of dance. I can only review the overall impact of the show. And I’ve always liked DANCING best when they give us what we want – true B-listers slumming it and making us remember what we loved about them while showing us how graceful they are. But this season, it seems like I don’t know half of these “stars” and to be honest – once the people I know are gone, I don’t stick around to find out who wins.
Grade: C
UPDATE: Now Kim Kardashian is gone. So am I.
BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
I think the reason I’ve been so hard on this show over the years is because it comes so frustratingly close to being great, yet it absolutely refuses to yield it’s “comedy” to let the drama breathe. And yes, there are moments of true wit, and yes, Spader and Shatner truly have unbelievable chemistry. But imagine if this had been set in the real world instead of this post-Ally McBeal weirdo universe. I remember the last season of McBeal, when a character would walk in the room they had this sort of, sound-off of all the character tics. The one guy would whistle, the dragon lady would hiss, someone would swoop their necks – all in drama-killing sound effects. This is essentially the same show with a classier cast and issue-oriented cases (mostly.) Shatner is great as Denny Crane, but they overplay his shtick shamelessly. James Spader, who seems to be finally underplaying Alan just a little bit, is undeniably great as Alan – but this show – in its last season, never cared enough about these characters to draw a real storyline – it’s just like, bad sitcom ideas with some juicy courtroom drama. Anyway, I’m sure I will watch this season to see what happens – but, if only the producers would just trust the acting and the stories to carry this instead of the Catskills Comedy vibe that infects every episode.
Grade: C +
UPDATE: BOSTON LEGAL (ABC)
So – fucking BOSTON LEGAL bounced back the next week with an insanely good story that tackled the voting age, a little girl’s rape and a case against the big pharmaceutical companies – and it was great. They even made some inside jokes about this being their last year (Shatner asked “Can’t we try another time slot?”) but I have to admit – this was a great, gripping episode that definitely showed why Shatner and Spader have walked off with so many Emmys.
Grade: B +
TaLK TO ME (HBO)
Don Cheadle stars as real-life radio trailblazer Ralph "Petey" Greene, a high-school dropout and charismatic ex-con who leveraged a prison disc jockey gig into a stint at a Washington, D.C., radio station, a television show and an invitation to the White House. Don Cheadle is electrifying in the role, and the first hour of this film, which charts Greene’s ascension from Jail to radio star is fantastic. And then the film takes a completely unexpected turn (at least to me) and becomes less electrifying but very interesting. The supporting cast is stellar, and I personally thought this was going to be some kind of Howard Stern PRIVATE PARTS retread – but it’s completely original and real and highly recommended.
Grade: B
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 3rd episode)
Vince agrees to come to a sweet 16 for an appearance fee and Ari gets into an escalating war with his long time rival agent, Davies. This was the best of the first batch of 5th season eps, and the sweet 16 girl was hilarious and the place that Ari’s war goes was surprising, although – Ari is seen without his car at the end saying “there was a problem” that seemed to get left on the cutting room floor. Still – this was a particularly good episode.
Grade: A -
UPDATE: Next Episdoe.
ENTOURAGE (HBO – 4th episode)
Finally, after all that talk and wish fulfillment of the boys – we are returning to my favorite topic of ENTOURAGE – the art of the deal. This ep, which had Ari and Vince trying to sell SMOKEJUMPERS while E. tried to weasel out of his commitment to Vince’s old agent (I forget her name) – was awesome. Not a huge fan of Giavani Ribisi – but otherwise – these are killer eps.
Grade: A
DON’T FORGET THE LYRICS! (FOX)
The only thing more annoying than the two singing sisters was Wayne Brady himself. I would probably like this show if not for Brady. He’s either the most useless, phoniest guy in Hollywood, or just doing a great impression of it. The two sisters on the show I watched were so unbearable, seriously – did anybody see them? Yet I love the idea of this show. Replace the host and I’d watch it every week. Wayne Brady is to comedy what Adolph Hitler is to comedy.
Grade: C -
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES (FOX)
Chef Ramsey had his toughest challenge yet with an incredibly arrogant young chef, and this continues to be one of the best reality shows on TV. Every episode is usually packed with great stuff and Ramsey is a great reality star. Funny, quick witted and real – although I still think the wrong person won last summers HELL’S KITCHEN.
Grade: A
ER (NBC)
ER debuted to their 15th and final season with a frantic and somber tale about Greg Pratt, who’s been on the show for 7 seasons. No spoilers – but this was as harrowing and tense hour as the show has had in a long time.
Grade B +
THE OFFICE ( NBC)
Would do you say about a show that believes itself to be the funniest show on television, but – in actuality – is one of the least funny shows on television?
Grade: C –
WAITRESS (HBO)
I loved this movie. I loved the story, I loved the theme – I especially loved the dialog. The dialog was as good as it gets in a wistful tale like this. At one point, Kerri Russel, who plays the married pregnant lead perfectly (and seems light years away from her FELICITY role,) is having this sort-of platonic relationship with a married man and they talk a lot in these scenes but it’s great talk. Kerri says in a VOICE OVER: “I became addicted to talking to him. And addicted to my words meaning something to someone.” The life observations in this are also real, shrewd and dead-on. At one point, Russel’s oafish husband, played to absolute perfection by Jeremy Sisto, doing yet another totally original take on the asshole, is having sex with her and asks her to talk dirty. She replies “what do you want me to…” and she’s interrupted by him finishing. This is just a great film and I really loved every single second of it. The director and co-star, Adrien Shelley did a superb job with this film, and days before its release she was killed in her apartment by a construction worker she had a beef with. I’m sketchy on the exact details – but – Jesus. In any case, I doubt she’d want the review to focus on her death, but if felt irresponsible not to mention it. Either way, she left behind 3 kids, a husband and a perfect film.
Grade: A+
IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA (FX)
I always thought this show tried way too hard to be funny and endearing. I recently watched a fresh batch of eps and found that I’m still right – except that the show is a bit more funny and endearing than I initially gave it credit for. Either they’ve really improved, or they’re simply more confident now in their storytelling and point of view. Danny Devito, such an 80s sitcom star – is completely reinvented as the wretched father and even though the main cast still tries a bit too hard - it all sort of works much better now and I will be watching and maybe catching up with some previous episodes. I sort of like the audacity of the stories even if I’m not always crazy about the execution.
Grade: B
KIMMEL LIVE! (ABC)
Jimmy had a really funny sketch on the other night – first they showed Matt Damon talking really vaguely about Sarah Palin and how it’s like a bad Disney movie –then they put a faux promo together that – this is impossible to explain – but really funny. Jon Hamm was on the same show and was hilarious with Jimmy.
Grade: A
IN BRUGES (DVD)
A very slow start that builds to a real depth in this look at these 2 hitmen who are laying low In Bruges after they’ve just completed some hit. It’s not at all an issue based film, but rather – it’s rumination on friendship and violence, movie violence – but it does so entertainingly and even wistfully. This is a rather unusual film in which there is nothing I can think of in recent memory that really compares to it. It’s truly unique and original and it will stay with you longer than you suspect. And by the way – Colin Farrell – best role of his career. Rest of the fairly unknown cast is as good – just can’t remember all their names. Highly recommended.
Grade: B +
BILL MAHR (HBO)
Is a great show, but did he really have to call Sarah Palin a bimbo? What is he?
Grade: A
OUTSIDERS INN (CMT)
So fucking ridiculous. So overly and obviously badly scripted. It started out okay – but by now, the 5th episode in, you literally can’t believe what you’re watching and how contrived, set up and god-awful the whole production is. You have these insane incidents that would NEVER happen in real life, then you have the three idiots, Bobby Brown, Maureen McCormick (Marcia Brady) and Carnie Wilson doing testimonials about there “night in jail.” (Because Maureen – in an insultingly scripted scene – was dancing with a cowboy in this empty bar when their central-casting hussies came by to make trouble and Maureen announced “Let’s throw down now!”) Then they got taken to the slammer. So you had Marcia Brady and Carnie Wilson complaining about being in jail because Maureen doesn’t back down from a fight….this is a fucking insult and everyone involved with this show should be arrested.
Grade: F -
FAMILY GUY (FOX)
Reminded us why it’s one of the best half hours on Fox with their season premiere, in an episode that had Brian dressed as Snoopy (along with a Woodstock to complete the profane joke that followed,) Brian having sex with a civilian while Stewie proved himself to be more of a freak than ever, and ended with Cleveland (soon to be star of his own series) complaining that having sex with that woman is something he will never forget – she left him a genital wart. Brian and Cleveland looked at each other a long time after Cleveland revealed the information – and then Cleveland said “It hurts.”
Grade: A
THE SIMPSONS (FOX)
Another winner – from the 20th season premiere. Ned and Homer became bounty hunters and Marge took to baking for an erotic bakery. While I think they missed about half the jokes re: the bakery – this show, after all these years, is still rock solid.
Grade: A
AMERICAN DAD (FOX)
Not so much.
Grade: C -
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