Last Blog Of The Year! Hail Rocky Balboa!

I've been off-line on the blog for a few weeks because the new OPEN RIDE AOL or whatever they are calling it fucking SUCKS. It has possibly the worst design of any web browser ever in the history of the web, and the mail section is completely fucked, so when I try to send out a link, it tells me something is wrong with the address line, but it won't tell me what. Luckily, I figured out a way to get the old AOL 9.0 so I can resume my blogging activities.

The stuff between Trump and Rosie is INSANE. I tend to side with The Donald, Rosie shoots her mouth off and it's not usually funny or especially informed, but I think calling someone out on being unattractive is lower then low. Especially on that high a profile. Still, Rosie's response: making a face? Sounds like she actually is afraid of being sued.

Wasn't that cool that we finally filmed a 30 foot giant squid!!! Then we split it open and killed it - just in time for the holidays!

ROCKY BALBOA (In Theaters)
One of the most pleasant surprises of the year, though I still think that script could've used another draft, there's enough great stuff here to warrant going to the theater.

In fact, I've seen every ROCKY movie in the theatre - even the dreadful 5, which this has more in common with then anybody is willing to admit - though in a good way. This is almost a great rewrite of 5. The acting from everybody is top notch, and stallion, once again, is completely on the money as Rocky, even better. The story moves along slow till fiction' time comes, but this is a bit of a character piece, and it's amazing how much you find yourself caring for Rocky at this point. When I heard they were bringing back Marie from the corner, I rolled my eyes - but it works great.

I have some problems with this - but I can't talk about them without giving away spoilers - and it's not about the results, it's about some questionable flimsiness late in the game, but again - there is no reason not to see this. Unlike LAND OF THE DEAD, the new STAR WARS and all the other creaky resurrections, this one packs a punch - and I swear I will not be shocked if we get one more out of Balboa - after this, it would be welcome. But if this is the end, what a way to go. Most impressive of all was that Stallone was finally able to again craft a real story of heart and emotion and actually make a subtle film. This is perhaps his greatest victory.
Despite some reservations...
Grade: A

THE ACTOR'S STUDIO: EDDIE MURPHY
Pretty great - fun to see Eddie doing character and being funny and humble. Ever since he tried to pick up a trannie Eddie has shyed away from the press, so this was a treat. He talked about his family, his past - his rise, it was unusually good.
Grade: B

Elevator To The Gallows (IFC)
Louise Malle's first film - this is a really good story about a guy who commits murder in the opening minutes of the film, then gets stuck in the elevator en route to escape and all the weird shit that goes on around the incident.
Grade: B

King Of Queens (CBS)
This show returns for one last 13 episode season. Aside from Carrie suddenly being model-thin again, and her hair looking like it might be a bad wig, this is the same funny show it's always been. Some have been better then others, and there's a noticeable lack of Arthur this season - and the show also has the air of something that's a dead issue re: the ending. I'm sure everybody's salary got too high.

It's a shame this never grew into more - Doug and Carrie should've had a kid towards the end (maybe they still will) and it seems like Doug and Arthur could've gotten further in their relationship - but this show's main concern has always been being funny - and aside from a funny but REALLY mean spirited episode that had Doug and Carrie trying to get rid of a dog, (what the fuck were they thinking?), the show has been as funny as ever. Partaker the strolling that had Arthur pimping out old people to sit in people's cars so they could use the rainbow lane (is that what it's called?) Anyway - good stuff. This will be missed.
Grade: A -

DEXTER (Showtime)
Great show. So-so ending. I thought they kind of de-fanged the ice cream truck killer in the last moments and really went for a foregone conclusion to the story. The side characters never really rise above the retarded machinations of late-era NYPD BLUE, but Michael C. Hall absolutely stuns as Dexter, and I can't wait for next season.
Season Finale: B -
Full Season Grade: A

SLEEPER CELL (Showtime)
I've watched the first 2 or 3 and it's good - though not quite as riveting as the first go round.
Grade: B -


THE NOTORIOUS BETTIE PAGE (DVD)
A much bigger bore then I ever would've expected, but whoever plays Bettie is as hot as a pistol - it's a shame the movie couldn't be as sexy as it's subject.
Grade: C -

WHO KILLED THE ELECTRIC CAR (DVD)
Great docu on the ill-fated electric car - a subject which makes a lot of people angry, since this was our shot at getting over our addiction to foreign oil. Nonetheless, the movie is worth the rental just to check out Mel Gibson's crazy beard.
Grade: B+

Jimmy Kimmel had Howard Stern on 2 Fridays ago and it was probably Howard's best talk show appearance in forever. I don't know how they put Howard in Jimmy's chair, being that Howard was in NY, but the off-air buddies and the ABC technology has now found an absolutely flawless way to have inter-state guests. Also hilarious was the superheroes re-enactment of Chanuka. Mr. Kimmel has been on quite a roll.

Grade: A

HOUSE (FOX)
House has been fun as usual, and thankfully, the Tritter storyline is coming to a close.
Grade: A

MY DATE WITH DREW (MAX)
Reminded me a lot of 30 DATES, another "cute" indie about a guy with a camera who thinks he's adorable because he has a camera. When he finally got his date with Drewtard I almost became nauseous.
Grade: D

SCARFACE (DVD PLATINUM EDITION)
I got suckered and bought this new edition with cleaned up sound - but you know what - the sound is now AWESOME. And there are some cool extras - but if you bought the box from 3 years ago, there's no reason to re-purchase. Best scene: too many to mention, but when Al tells the folks at the restaurant to "What are you looking at you fucking assholes? Say goodnight to the bad guy," there may be nothing else like that for a while.
Grade: A

EXTRAS (HBO ON DEMAND)
Been re-watching this Ricky Gervais show in anticipation of the new season - the first 3 were good - the last 3 eps were REALLY good. Still - it's no OFFICE.

REAL WORLD: COLORADO (MTV)
I like the new cast of developmentally challenged folks living together. Now, I hjust think they're going out of their way to pick out fucktards to live in the house.

BREAKING BONADUCE (VH1)
What a boring ending for such a usually crazy show.
SEASON FINALE: B -
FULL SEASON GRADE: B +


AWAKENINGS (DVD)
Re-watched this recently and forgot that this is one of the very best films of the 90s and a major tear jerker. Maybe Penny Marshal's finest hour as a director, ever. And perhaps Robin Williams finest acting until GOOD WILL HUNTING. There is also a haunting score to go along with it.
Grade: A +


24/7 (MTV)
Utterly fucking unwatchable.
Grade: F

STERN ON LETTERMAN (CBS)
Boring.

FROSTY THE SNOWMAN (CBS)
Great. Though I had completely forgotten the storyline with the crazy magician and his evil hat!

SNL: ANNETE BENNING AND GWEN STEPHANI (NBC)
As bad as it gets.
Grade: D

20/20 - the McDonalds prank caller case
Disgusting. (If you saw it.)

DR PHIL - DANNY & GRETCHEN BONADUCE (SYND)
I'm getting to the point where I've had quite enough of Mr. Bonaduce - what was so compelling last year seems very sad now - and I'm starting to not like her.


JARHEAD (HBO)
I didn't watch the last 20 minutes because it seemed to head into predictable territory, but Jake Gylenhall is really good - but Peter Skarsgard steals the show in this war movie based in Iraq.
Grade: C

HANNAH & HER SISTERS (DVD)
Saw this again recently - perfect film. Woody has made 4 perfect films which seem like sequels or rewrites of each other. Annie Hall is great, but Manhattan seems like the even better remake. Hannah is great, and CRIMES & MISDEMEANORS seems like a stellar sequel.
Grade: A+

30 ROCK (NBC)
Funniest new show of the season. Alec Baldwin is da bomb, y'all.
Grade: A


AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL (CW)
I can't remember who won. That can't be a good sign.

NIP/TUCK (FX)
Once again, what would Christmas be without a WILDLY off the rails NIP/TUCK doing what it does best - fucking up it's legacy. This year, they ripped off MAGNOLIA (???) and ended with the characters deciding to go to LA. Honestly - if you were someone following this show - this episode proved to be sort of a landmark in stupidity and indulgence. Can this show ever be saved? No.
Grade: D
But - If I were grading for sheer audacity and balls with no thought whatsoever to good storytelling: B

THE WIRE (HBO)
Brilliant ending to a brilliant next-to-last season. If season 5 is any bleaker, we may all kill ourselves.

Grade: A


THE BEST OF 2006

Best Talk show: JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE

Best Movie: Rocky Balboa, Babel, Borat, Jackass 2, Hard Candy, Who Killed The Electric Car, The Al Gore movie (forgot the name.)

Best TV Show: 30 Rock, THE OFFICE BBC, THE OFFICE AMERICA, Justice, Dexter, Weeds, The Sopranos, The Wire, King Of Queens, Family Guy, Entourage, Wonder Showzen, Drawn Together.

Best CDS: Meatloaf - Bat 3, My Chemical Romance, The KIlers - Tom's Town, Billy Joel - 12 Gardens Live (I admit, my musical taste runs a bit on the safe side.) But where was the new Dr. Drew CD they kept saying was coming out?

Best reason to get satellite radio: Howard Stern (and thanks for the plug!)

Too much stuff to mention, but thanks to everybody that read the blog this year, have a great holiday season, good luck and thanks for all the fish.

Shalom, Everybody.

Until Next Year,
The Digital Couch.