The return of the couch! Decades edition. Sort of.

Part 1.

I haven't seen all the year end films and probably won't - so this is a highly subjective and limited list. None the less, I've seen quite a few films.

In no particular order, here are some of the best things about 2009. And some of the worst. And some in between.

1.) PRECIOUS
It's really bleak. It's pretty dark and it was never meant to be ROCKY. But it's about the best drama I've seen in a long time with such originality that all of its ghetto cliches feel fresh and new. Based on a harrowing true story of a real girl growing up in Harlem in the 80s, precious features out of the box performances by its lead, Gabourey Sidibe as the young girl and as her mother, Monique gives a completely unexpected and lived in performance. Mariah Carrey is shockingly good in her two quick scenes and the direction is quite good, if a little outlandish in some of the quick fantasy sequences that feel completely out of place and amateurishly executed. That very minor quibble aside - this is a must see.

2.) WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE
Completely original and wholly indescribable. The film, about the needs and yearnings of an aggressive young boy, quickly gets to a place where we are stuck for the rest of the movie. Initially it feels like a sentence. About 5 minutes later I realized I was literally in the mind of the boy and taken to a place in film I've never been before. The creatures are CGI marvels, James Gandolfini does some of his best work voicing the main puppet, and while I would not recommend this for kids at all - it's maybe one of the best kids films made for adults ever.

3.) PAUL BLART: MALL COP
Okay - not one of the year's best at all - but a far funnier film than it had a right to be. Kevin James can save almost any material and this had the feel of DIE HARD in a mall - and it all worked really well. I laughed out loud often. (not one of the year's best, just a great rental - but felt I should include this.)

4.) GOMORRAH
Unsentimental, hard, complicated to understand, and ultimately brilliant. Doing away with the kind of mob-sentimentality that made THE SOPRANOS the best show ever, this slow burn of multi-story mob tales builds to an overall feeling that - loyalty doesn't mean shit.

5.) I LOVE YOU, MAN
The best Judd Apatow film not directed by Judd Apatow. Paul Rudd and Jason Siegal are just great as new found pals and the supporting cast, particularly Jon Favrau and Jamie Presley, do killer work in this likable comedy.

6.) THE GREAT BUCK HOWARD
Offbeat film that's supposedly about The Amazing Kreskin, I really enjoyed this. Colin Hanks is great and John Malchovich is perfect as the age-addled Buck Howard.

7.) CRANK: HIGH VOLTAGE
Outrageous sequel to the outrageous and cult classic original - this film had no right to be funny, fresh and moving. Yet it was all those things. Way better than you'd think. And yes, it made no sense.

8.) TERMINATOR: SALVATION
Part 1 was great. T2 was probably one of the best of the genre. Part 3 sucked hard - this one almost fails to show up. The best thing this film produced was Christian Bale's outragous on set tirade at the sound man who kept stepping into frame during shooting: in fact, the following might be the best thing about 2009 (although - Tiger Woods was caught with 14 women right in time for Christmas) - in the meantime, enjoy one last jaunt through Mr. Bale's words:
...kick your fucking ass. I want you off the fucking set you prick. No, don't just be sorry, think for one fucking second. What the fuck are you doing? Are you professional or not? Do I fucking walk around and rip- no, shut the fuck up Bruce, do I-no! No! Don't shut me up. Am I going to walk around and rip your fucking lighs down? In the middle of a scene? Then why the fuck are you walking right through? a-tada-tada like this in the background, what the fuck is it with you? What don't you fucking understand? You got any fucking idea about- Hey! It's fucking distracting having somebody walking up behind bryce in the middle of the fucking scene. Gimme a fucking answer. What don't you get about it? ... fuck sake man you're amateur... you've got something to say to this prick? Well somebody's should be watching him and keeping an eye on him. It's the second time that he doesn't give a fuck about what is going on in front of the camera. Alright? I'm trying to fucking do a scene here and I'm going why the fuck is Shane walking in there? What is he doing there? Do you understand? My mind is not in the scene if you're doing that. Stay off the fucking set man, for fuck's set. Right let's go again. Let's not take a fucking minute, let's go again. And let's not have you fucking walking in... You're unbelievable man, you're un-fucking-believable. The number of times you stroll in the fucking background. I've never had a DP behave like this. You don't fucking understand what its like working with actors. That's what that is. I'm not asking you, I'm telling you. You wouldn't have done that otherwise. I'm gonna fucking kick your fucking ass if you don't shut up for a second, alright? I'm gonna go, do you want me to go and trash your lights? Do you want me to fucking trash them? Then why are you trashing my scene? You do it one more time, and I wain't walking back to set if you're still hired... seriously man - you and me, we're fucking done professionally.... fucking ass.

How fucking great is that? If I could live, breathe and work in that - I would. It's that good.

Fucking amateur.

The movie itself was really rubbish, though. A true waste of time.


9.) UP
I have the last half hour to go on this, and aside from the amazing first 20 minutes which show a life, a marriage and a death with unbelievable poetry and wisdom, I never got into the rest of this Pixar film the way some did. Sorry. I didn't really get this one.

10) THE HANGOVER
Kinda funny, but very overrated.

11.) LAND OF THE LOST
Had its moments, but considering the amazing source material - this could've been the best super specific spoof in the world or the coolest action movie ever. Instead, it was a middling Will Ferrel comedy that was saved occasionally by some crude humor courtesy of the always hilarious Danny McBride.

12.) PUBLIC ENEMIES
Considering the director and the star, this was a massive one-note disappointment.

13.) DISTRICT 9
One of the year's best and one of the more unique movies in the sci-fi category. Starts as a documentary then casually morphs into a straight narrative. The special effects are very special and the metaphors actually work the relationship between the two leads was both moving and original.

14.) INGLORIOUS BASTERDS
QT honestly did it again. I would say one of his best, but then - he's only made about 6 films and they're all spectacular. Even JACKIE BROWN, originally kind of dissed in its theatrical release, is amazing if you go back and look at it. I even really liked DEATH PROOF, though that may be the least of his efforts. But getting back to BASTARDS, the cast is great, particularly the Jew Hunter, Brad Pitt is perfect and the last sequence between the theatre owner and the star of the faux film - haunting. The finale is one of the best 15 minutes of 2009. One of the years, and decades, very best. It exists as both a great war film, and firmly a Tarantino film.

15.) THE INFORMANT!
Really good, if not great. But really good. Matt Damon , howeer, is great.

16.) ZOMBIELAND
I love zombie movies and was hoping for more pathos in this - but it remained mostly a comedy throughout and as that, worked just fine. I just felt it could've been so much more. They just announced a 3-D sequel - that should be fun.

17.) THE BLIND SIDE
Like Hilary Swank before her, Sandra Bullock bravely plays a white woman who feels a compassionate need to help a needy young black man. Only this movie, with all its white guilt cliches, is written and directed so well that it all works. And Bullock, who really has found a way to step up her acting game in this film. is pitch perfect. Based on a true story, this is way better than I ever thought it could be.

Ok, so - I promised 10, gave you 17 - and I still have many films to watch.

This is the first part of my year end series and will do a few blogs with the rest of the notable 2009 releases along with my best picks for tv of the year, the year in music, and then I will really fuck up the best of the decade list.

In the meantime, here are some of the best of the decade films:
THE WRESTLER (not just a Mickey Rourke comeback but a great film all on its own)
THE DARK KNIGHT (superhero masterpiece)
WALL.E
FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL (unrated version - one of my very favorites)
TOWELHEAD (very dark, very good - maybe not a decade best, but one of the years best.)
ROLE MODELS (maybe not best of the decade - but pretty awesome.)


Stay tuned for part 2.